Pryor is in and out of consciousness for the next few days. Part of it is because of having been injured. But a part of it is because it’s much easier to close your eyes and pretend things are okay than to live in the real world. I’m guessing when she closes her eyes, Sam is alive and all is well. The only trouble is, sooner or later you will have to open your eyes.

When she is awake, she’s quiet. I give her updates as I get them from the team. Most of the humans are out of immediate danger, but a few are still clinging to life in ICU. I wondered if giving her updates was wise, but if it were me I would not want to be left in the dark.

The rainstorms haven’t let up. There are times when it’s stronger than others but it’s still raining. Pryor’s dad, Marcus, must be having a hard time consoling his wife, Emmy. However, I’m sure the rain will stop eventually because Marcus won’t give up until she gets better.

How long does it take to get over the death of your child?

I sit up on the bed and look out into the gloomy sky. I silently offer my condolences to Pryor’s parents. I then turn to look at their child lying beside me. And the thoughts that I had been trying to push away, now invade my mind.

Was there something I could have done to prevent Harm from getting to Sam? Would things have been better if I didn’t stay away? Did I allow The Center to turn me into a coward? Or did I do the brave thing by staying away?

I hate when I go down this road in my head. There is simply no way to know if the choices I’ve made were the right ones. All I know is staying away was the only way I could keep The Center from sending the Omari bastards after me.

I recall all the rat holes, dive bars, and back alleys I frequented after Diana and I parted ways. I didn’t fight like before or blow anything up. And except for the occasional one-night stand, I pretty much left the girls alone. I wore a black hoodie, kept my mouth shut, and faded into the background.

I was a pathetic miserable soul and wanted nothing to do with the Angel world. I hated most of them, especially Paras. Yet I was unable to summon up enough hate to really harm them even after all they did to me.

To make matters worse, the only thing I had to look forward to was also the thing I dreaded: the moment when Pryor needed me. On one hand I looked forward to it because it meant that I would be able to lay eyes on her again. On the other hand, Pryor is skilled and powerful. If she needed me, it meant she was in real trouble.

It wasn’t just Pryor I was worried about; it was the whole team. Like Pryor, Key and Swoop are skilled but that didn’t mean they couldn’t get hurt. Take East for example, he’s one of the most powerful Quos I know but sometimes he second-guesses himself because he’s only half angel. That doubt can sometimes cause him to make mistakes during battle. And then there’s Bex...

Bex and I were cool once, a long time ago. But I caught him looking at Pryor after a training session one day. It was just a quick flash but I swear there was longing in his eyes. It irritated me. That was just schoolboy crap though; nothing too serious.

Then I was taken to The Center where my life was essentially taken from me. I later learned The Center was run by Paras, and that made me detest most of them, including Bex. Yet however I may feel about him, Bex is on the team and I wouldn’t let him get killed. So no matter how far off the grid I was, I watched the angel channel to ensure everything was okay back home.

I recall the night I heard about Malakaro and whose child he was. I knew Pryor would be distraught and I wanted to be there with her. I forced myself not to go near her. But I paid extra attention to current events. When I heard about the Pathway explosion I was Recharging under a bridge in Oslo, Norway. I headed back to the team immediately.

I knew the Angel world would try and protect the team, but I also knew Pryor. I knew she could be impulsive. Then I learned about this human named Randy who needed Stirr and Pryor was helping him get it from a demon. I sought them out and found them just outside some bar that had been trashed.

As soon as I landed, the team told me Pry had gone after the demon named Kill. We all split up and tried to find her. I fought hard to keep the panic at bay. I had to believe that I had gotten there in time.

Once I saw a house in flames a few blocks away, I knew Kill was behind it. Demons loved setting things on fire. When I got closer, I saw a human laying dead at the front door. I scouted out the scene and saw the demons attacking Pryor.

I was about to intervene when I heard a human baby cry. I knew I needed to see to the baby’s safety first. I quietly entered through the window and carried the baby out. When I went back in, Pryor was on fire on the floor. The demons tried to stop me from saving her.

I killed one of them; the other escaped. I then carried Pryor away. It was only when she was safe and sound in the warehouse that I started to think clearly.

Bex and East had gone to watch over Randy. Meanwhile Key had come out of her makeshift hospital room and told us Pryor was better and should wake soon. That’s when the tension in the air began to lift. I knew for sure because that’s when I was attacked by Swoop. Well, attacked is the wrong word, but she did leap onto my back and wrap her legs and hands around me.

“How dare you stay away so long? Look how hot and amazing I’ve gotten during your absence,” she demanded. 

I playfully threw her off of me knowing she’s impossibly agile and would land on her feet. Sure enough, Swoop did a few back flips and landed right in front of me. She stood there poised and ready to be marveled over. 

The truth is Swoop had turned into a hot chick. Before she was pretty but now she was an absolute babe. That’s what most guys would see, but not me. Swoop was like my little sister. I could never think of her in those terms.

“Actually, you’re a little on the scrawny side. In fact you’re kind of ugly,” I replied with a smile.

“I never liked you,” she informed me as she beamed and embraced me tightly.

Key told me she was glad that I was safe as she wrapped her arms around me. I’ve always admired her skills. Watching her kill is truly like watching an artist at work. I never got as close to Key as I did to her sister. I think it was because I knew Bex had feelings for Pry and it didn’t feel right that I never mentioned it to her. And even if I did, I’m not sure she’d believe me. And anyway what would be the point?

A few hours later the twins told me that Pryor was awake and wanted to see me. I thought of all the things I wanted to say to her. Unlike most girls, Pryor was never into the pretty flowers and scenic places. She loved anything odd and out of place. 

She said odd things on earth were examples of Omnis’s humor. And that discovering something odd was like catching Omnis in an unguarded moment of laugher. So she made a list of strange and unusual things she’d like to see. She called it her “Ha-Ha” list.

I wanted to tell her that she was never far from my mind and that I kept up the list in my travels. I added things that I thought she’d get a kick out of seeing. There’s the blob fish. Humans consider them ugly because they’re a misshaped blob. Yet I knew Pryor would find them intriguing if not adorable. Then there’s the tree I found with a car embedded in the trunk. And a river so salty that when the humans go into it, they come out twice the size they went in.

I wanted her to know that I visited every place she ever told me she traveled to with her mom so that I could see what she saw. And most of all I needed her to know that I wanted her. I always wanted her.

Yet when I entered the room and saw her standing there with the new clothes the twins went out and got her, all I could think was how close I came to losing her. The more I thought about it, the more it upset me. And in true “Silver” fashion, I blew it. I lost my temper and yelled at her.

“Hey, what are you doing?” Pryor asks, pulling me out of my flashback.

Focus, Aaden. She’s mourning her brother and she needs you to stay focused on the here and now.

“Oh, I was just gonna take care of the fire, it’s dying,” I reply as I send a small Powerball into the fireplace. The dying embers are now bright flames. 

“You seem pretty far away. What were you thinking about?” she asks.

“Nothing. How are you feeling?”

“Like I want to sleep forever,” she shares.

“My dad was like that after my mom died. It took a while for him to snap out of it.”

“How long?” she asks.

“Too long.”

I go over and apply more of Diana’s mixture to her wings. Then I make her drink more of Key’s mixture. She tells me it tastes awful but it does help.

“Has it been raining all this time?” she asks.

“Yeah, but it’ll stop,” I promise her.

“I wish I could talk to my parents—tell them how sorry I am that I didn’t protect Sam.”

“Pry, they already know. And blaming yourself won’t help.

“If you’re feeling up to it we can maybe take a walk? The rain has slowed down,” I tell her, hoping to improve her mood.

She doesn’t reply. Her eyes are already closed. She’s gone again.

The next day, I head back to the Seller shop to get more supplies for us. When I get back,

I knock on the door of the cabin before entering.

“Hey, can I come in?” I ask.

“Just a sec,” she says.

I’m glad she’s awake but what she says will take a few seconds takes like ten minutes. I still don’t know what girls do that makes them take so long to get ready, but I have come to accept that as a fact of life. Pryor calls out and tells me to enter. I open the door and find her standing there in a tee shirt and nothing else.

She is easily the most amazing thing Omnis has ever created. But honestly I felt that way when she had her clothes on...

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were—I’ll come back,” I tell her as I quickly head for the door.

“No, don’t go. When I said come in, I meant it,” she says with a soft smile.

“Um...where are your pants?” I ask.

“Well, these few days all I’ve been doing is going from ‘sorrow’ and ‘rage’ to ‘more sorrow’ and ‘more rage.’ I want to feel something new. So I thought we could...you know,” she says shyly.

“Oh.” Is all I can think to say.

“So...you want to?” she asks.

“I’m gonna go so you can put your clothes back on.”

“What? Why?” she pushes, sounding hurt and insulted.

“We can’t do this.”

“Why not?”

“Because you’re in mourning for someone you love, someone we both loved.”

“I know what I’m mourning. You don’t need to remind me. Why can’t we just do this? I mean really who cares?”

“Pryor, we can’t.”

“Why? And don’t blame it on grief.”

“Okay, you want another reason? How about this: you’re not ready.”

“You’re not in my head or my body. How do you know I’m not ready to...you know,” she says.

“For one thing, people who are ready to have sex don’t call it ‘you know.’”

“So you’re turning me down because my vocabulary is too childish for you?” she replies.

“I’m saying—”

“Okay, fine. Let’s try it again. Aaden, would you like to fuck?” she replies crudely.

I march up to her and lean in; I can tell by her wide eyes, she’s thrown by how near I am to her. She thinks it’s about to happen. We are about to have sex. Instead I reach past her shoulder, grab her jeans, and hand them to her. 

“Put your pants on,” I order firmly.

She rolls her eyes and I look away as she steps back into her jeans.

“You’re such an asshole,” she snaps.

“Why, because I don’t want to take advantage of you?”

“Because I need you right now and you aren’t there for me,” she barks.

“I am the only one who’s here for you. There’s no one else around.”

“Too bad there isn’t. Then maybe I could get some,” she says. 

“Well, I’m sorry okay, but even if you weren’t in mourning I would never fuck you.”

“WHY?”

“BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT THE KIND OF GIRL I’D FUCK; YOU’RE THE KIND OF GIRL I’D...”

I don’t finish my thought because it’s pointless. She doesn’t need to know how many times I’ve thought about being with her. She doesn’t need to know that she’s my first and last thought every single day. And she certainly doesn’t need to know what even the thought of holding her hand does to me.

“The kind of girl you’d what?” she asks.

I can’t make eye contact with her. She moves in closer and tries to get me to look her in the face.

“Aaden, help me out here. I thought you and I...we used to be close. And now it’s different. What happened?”

“Things that I couldn’t control. Now isn’t the time to get into all that. Just please trust me when I say that us having sex isn’t going make your pain go away,” I reply.

“How do you know?”

“I just do. Sex takes all the bad stuff away but only for an hour or maybe even two. Then it all comes back; the black hole that was threatening to swallow you gets even bigger,” I admit.

“It’s just as well. I’d probably be really bad at it,” she confesses as she plops down on the bed.

“Why would you think that?”

“Because I’m not like Key or Swoop. They know stuff. I’d get it all confused and put things places they don’t belong,” she says, only half joking.

I smile despite myself and sit down beside her.

“That’s crap. Whoever gets to be your first is damn lucky.”

“I wouldn’t even know where to start with him. I’d be clumsy and uncertain,” she adds, mostly to herself.

“He would be the same,” I reply.

“Why?”

“Because he’d know what to do with other girls but you’re not like other girls. The wonder and sparkle in your eyes would pull him in so deep he’d never be able to look away. When he leaned in to brush a stray hair from your face, he’d inhale your scent. And the fragrance would give him a peace he’d never been able to find, even in the light. And if he ever got the chance to lay with you...he’d fumble and his hands would shake like an idiot because he just couldn’t believe that kind of grace would be granted to him.”

I didn’t even realize I had run my hand through her hair while I was talking. I had no idea that I had placed my hand on the nape of her neck. Her eyes had lured me in and distracted me from the fact that we were inches away from kissing and getting closer.

I then did the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my entire life; I pulled away from Pryor.

“Gonna check for ...demons. Make sure the area is safe,” I lie.

I run out without waiting for a reply. I head to the small shed a few yards from the cabin. Once inside, I lock the door and gasp as the pain in my chest pulsates and then spreads throughout my body. The agony is so severe I’m brought to my knees, panting. The pain lasts for only a few minutes, but it’s enough to make me wish I were dead.

I crawl over to the tool table and grab a piece from a mirror I had broken awhile back. I aim it at my chest so I can get a good look at the damage: The black mark carved into my stomach had been extended nearly two inches because of my encounter with Pryor a few moments ago. Had I kissed her, the carving would have extended even further. Had we made love like I wanted to, it would have brought me that much closer to The Center. And this time, they would surely kill me...