23.0 Marriage The Christian View
( By David Clarke 23 rd June 1996 amended June 1999) God from the beginning of creation instituted marriage. Adam was made first and Eve was made from Adam’s flesh and bone as his help meet. After they had fallen into sin God spoke reprovingly to Adam for harkening to the voice of his wife after she had sinned in the garden of Eden. God also spoke to the women condemingly saying,
Gen 2 18.
“I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband and he shall rule over thee “.
Gen 3 17
To Adam he said because you have harkened to the voice of your wife and disobeyed my voice he cursed the ground saying in sorrow would he eat of it all the days of his life. Thorns and thistles would grow and in the sweat of his brow would he eat bread. Until he die.
As women suffer in child birth and thorns and thistles grow and men have to work by the sweat of their brow so this curse remains and has not been removed because God uses this for his own glory. We may learn from it if we listen and hearken to his voice.
The Christian view of marriage has always been clear
Ephesians 5 22
“ wives submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is head of the church : and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be subject to their own husband in every thing.
Husbands love you wives even as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it. etc. So ought men to love their wives as their own body. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
1 Cor 12 3
There is clarity about the position of man and women before God. In this light we can view marriage.
The is no direct indication in the scripture as to how a marriage is entered into but it is generally agreed the man and woman wishing to marry:
1 Marriage promises are made in public before witnesses.
2 must do so willingly
3 there is a leaving the parental home and a cleaving too each other.
4 the intention is for life
5 partners cannot leave the marriage
6 A marriage can only be devolved if ;
a) adultery takes place and that only by the injured party. Divorce does not have to take place if adultery happens.
b) The unbelieving partner wishes to leave (this leaving being an act of the will and ceasing to behave as a married person) and the believer releases them.
7 The legal part to marriage and divorce is only a technical aspect. It is not the actuality. Just like a death certificate does not make the person dead nor a birth certificate give life to the baby, neither does a marriage or divorce certificate make a marriage or give rise to divorce.
Christian marriage involves the marriage partners promising each other certain things. The following marriage vows are derived from scripture and are longstanding Christian beliefs.
a The man promises his bride to love , honour, cherish, care and look after her even as Christ loves and cares for his church. ( Christ is his pattern). Col 3 19, Eph 5 25, 1 Pet 3 7.
b The women in return promises to love honour and obey her man ( as the church does to Christ). This is the pattern spoken of in Eph. 5 22-24. This order and pattern of promises are only derived from the scripture and has been the order of things throughout the Church age.
These promises form a covenant and they are made before God and in presence of witnesses. It is not a contract but a covenant and should not be broken. Even if partners fail to fulfil their promises. They are still bound by promise to fulfil their vows. Even if they ignore their vows they are still married. Each partner is responsible to go the second mile in making the relationship work.
In the marriage all the husband has is his wife’s even his body and likewise all the wife has belongs to her husband.
This form of marriage is how God intends it to be and I would argue to depart for the scriptural view of marriage is to turn from what God has revealed. I cannot see how any one in their right mind would turn from Gods way of things.
Open to discussion.
It sounds alright to me I would value any feedback.
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