Chapter 4: Transforming Your Mindset
Before you really begin developing your growth mindset, you need to be prepared to transform your mindset. Dweck, the founder of the theory of growth mindset, always claimed that there were three “stages” for people: fixed mindset, transition, and growth mindset. Before you can really embrace the growth mindset, you need to enter the transitional period.
The transformational part of the process requires you to focus more on identifying your fixed mindset patterns than it does with specific behavioral changes. Before you can start focusing on specific changes, you have to identify what needs to be changed. You can do this by taking your time and understanding where your fixed mindset lies in your life, and how you can really identify it. This process does take some time, so you want to be slow and intentional with it.
While you are in the transformational process, there is one thing you must understand: your fixed mindset likely runs a lot deeper than it appears to on a surface level. There is likely something that brought you towards reading this book but understand the more you pay attention, the more you are going to notice your fixed mindset and all of the ways it has rooted itself in your life. Since this is likely the first time you are truly investing in a growth mindset, you have probably had a fixed mindset for many years. This means that the symptoms are likely to run much deeper than you anticipate they do. It is very important that you take your time on this step and that you do not rush it. The more you can identify your fixed mindset, the more success you will have to transform your mindset to a growth mindset.
Your Fixed Mindset Has a “Voice,” Listen to It
Believe it or not, your fixed mindset actually has a “voice.” This voice is the one that tells you there is no point, which encourages you to believe that you are not capable of growth and that ultimately voices the “personality” of a fixed mindset. It affirms the beliefs associated with a fixed mindset and asserts them to you at every possible opportunity. This voice is constantly looking for proof and evidence that your limiting beliefs are true and that you should avoid growth. It tends to be a very toxic and limiting voice and can lead to more than just a lack of motivation: it can also lead to a lack of self-esteem, a lack of confidence, an increased risk for anxiety and depression, and an increased base stress-level.
This voice likely speaks to you a lot more than you realize it does, so it is important that you take the time to identify when and where it is coming through. The best way to do this part of the process is to have a journal or even a specific note on your phone that you add to. Each time you notice your fixed mindset voice speaking to you, go ahead and write it down. You want to write down what the limiting belief is, and what triggered you to have it.
Write down anything that comes up with it, even if it sounds unkind or false. For example, if it were to say something like “Of course that failed, you are never good at anything new so why bother? You are a failure, and now you look silly, too. You should be embarrassed.” Voicing this out loud to ourselves is painful, but we often fail to realize that even the internalized voice is painful. We have become so used to hearing it that we are numb to it. It can be embarrassing to admit that we have this voice, but this is the first step in fostering growth mindset. You have to be willing to identify the “problem” and be willing to put in the effort to genuinely learn about how you can improve this part of yourself.
Writing down the belief, what the voice said, and the trigger that caused this belief to go off can help you identify what is happening when you hear this voice speaking to you. The more you write this down, the more you are going to notice trends in the triggers. As well, the more aware you will become of this voice and the easier it will be to identify the deeper and less obvious triggers.
Take your time with this process. Ideally, you should let it last for at least a week. However, if you recall, the growth mindset is something we regularly work towards and not something we can actually attain. In the beginning, a week should be plenty to help you really identify this voice and start eliminating it. However, you need to be ready to continually assess this voice and work towards eliminating it from your life. The more you work on your growth mindset, the more you are going to hear this limiting voice. This cycle never ends, so do not expect to “finish” it during this process. Instead, sit with it long enough that you get a genuine understanding of the voice and how it affects you so that you can make a strong impact during your transformation from fixed mindset to growth mindset.
Make The Conscious Choice
The next part of the process is to consciously choose your growth mindset. After having a fixed mindset for so long, it can be easy to forget that you have the right to make a decision and that your decision holds validity and authority in your life. You are responsible for how you choose to interpret the experiences you have, including setbacks and challenges. Until now, you have chosen to criticize yourself and recognize them as inabilities and obstructions in your path. However, just as you always have, you have the choice to choose to see them as opportunities and lessons instead.
If you want to have success in this transformation, you have to consciously choose to have a growth mindset. This does not mean you will never experience the symptoms of a fixed mindset again, it simply means that any time you notice these symptoms you are going to make a conscious effort to eliminate them and hone your growth mindset. You will see them as lessons and opportunities, instead of obstacles and limitations. This goes for everything else that may hold you back from achieving what you want to achieve. Instead of seeing anything that arises as an impassable barrier, you have to make the conscious choice to see it as a lesson and an opportunity to grow. Then, you have to willingly and consciously choose to take on the lesson and opportunity and embrace the learning process. This will ensure that you are truly fostering a growth mindset.
Listen to Your Growth Mindset “Voice”
Just like you have a fixed mindset voice, you also have a growth mindset voice. If you want to have success in transforming from fixed mindset to growth mindset, you have to start practicing listening to your growth mindset. This may be hard because you have been ignoring it for so long, but trust that it is in there.
The best way to really foster your growth mindset is to voice it intentionally. Since it has been unheard for so long, it may be so quiet that you cannot hear it at all. You need to choose it consciously, and furthermore, you need to use it to “talk back” to your fixed mindset. Every time you have a fixed mindset thought, allow the growth mindset thought to come through and use it to “correct” the fixed mindset thought. It might feel like you are talking to yourself at first, but the more you use this solution, the easier your transformation will be. This is the best way to acknowledge your fixed mindset and replace it with your new growth mindset.
Begin the Development Phase
Once you have successfully identified your fixed mindset and understand where it is coming from, you can start the developmental phase. This is the part of the process where you are going to use specific tools and solutions to “combat” your fixed mindset and start replacing it with your growth mindset entirely. It will also help you enhance and develop your growth mindset so that it becomes powerful and all-encompassing.
Remember, this entire process is one you will likely go through many times over. The first part of the process truly is a transformation since, likely for the first time ever, you are choosing growth mindset. This is a big transformation in anyone’s life, and you should honor that in yourself. Understand, however, there will be many times where you notice new fixed mindset behaviors and have to replace them with growth mindset behaviors. Always work in this process: identifying the fixed mindset voice, talking back to it in a new growth mindset voice, and then using specific developmental tools and strategies to replace the fixed mindset entirely with new, healthier growth mindset habits and behaviors.
This way you can not only identify the fixed mindset patterns, but you can eliminate them and replace them with healthier patterns as well. This ensures that you aren’t only eliminating the negative or limiting patterns, but that you are replacing them with healthier and growth-oriented patterns. In doing so, you prevent yourself from falling back into the fixed mindset patterns.
Transforming fixed mindset to growth mindset takes time, and it is never fully “complete.” You will always be working on this transformation, so give yourself time and patience. This is the best time to practice growth mindset since you will need to truly invest and engage yourself in the growth process and learn to forgive yourself for mistakes and honor yourself no matter how silly or embarrassed you might be compelled to feel. The more you can honor yourself and embrace these factors in the transformation, the better you will be able to foster your growth mindset. See it all as a part of the process. The slower and more compassionately you move, the faster you will grow.