The Grand Delusion
So like a moth to the flame drugs caught me looking for a healthy alternative to a slow death from pizza, beer & Marlboro and I had the romantic notion that I could be the Marlboro Man of Marijuana.
I set off to be the next James Bond or bond Villain.
The simple question I asked myself was - what would a Bond do if he smoked pot? Easy, he'd smoke it anywhere, any time, any place with style and good manners of course.
The scene was set so instead of using a gold Dunhill lighter in Les Ambassadors casino in the infamous Dr No opening scene I would take the issue to the streets of Mayfair and London and start the debate by lighting the fire and essentially bringing to the War on Drugs back to the streets of London.
Daniel Craig very kindly left a great legacy and Layer Cake being one of my favourite films with Sienna Miller and that Yellow Range Rover totally captivating my attention both conscious and subconsciously the Yellow movement was in full swing.
One place that couldn't have been a more perfect environment was the outdoor gym. A great place to exercise but with the distinct benefit of weed being a great training partner.
As a mild pain relief and anti-inflammatory I quickly found myself with the combination of good music really excelling at Yoga, Calisthenics and body weight exercises.
Being in the zone training and really connecting with my body was a distinct advantage and the primary motivator to maintain my course so I went a long way to convince myself that I was really onto something.
It also really helped counter the standard lazy stoner stereotype and made a strong case for very good publicity, I figured if I got myself into great shape then people would really want to know the secret, which for a change wasn't steroids.
My goal was to do one arm pull ups, the thinking being this is the ultimate competition with oneself and really sets the bar in terms of personal strength to weight ratio.
I was very aware that all the health magazines and supplement companies spend millions taking about the latest and greatest fads in how to get a six pack and what the latest athletes are eating and drinking and it had occurred to me that getting on the front cover of High times with a six pack attributed to pot could be a fun way to get a date.
I also found riding the tube whilst standing up greatly enhanced the heightened awareness of my balance and posture and essentially became an expert in skiing or surfing the tube whilst exchanging a smile with a pretty lady if possible.
It really was like a game to see what the universe would present and whilst I'd previously picked up a girl on a bus I figured the tube was a real challenge, it was also one area where people rarely smile and realize how lucky they are to be gliding through the heart of the city in relative comfort.
Riding the tube early in the morning during winter rush hour can be quite an imposition on personal space its also a great test of perspective and sense of humor.
One thing I tried to keep reminding myself whilst smoking was this is just a joke don't take it too seriously and in the words of Bill Hicks "it's just a ride".
The primary goal was to be different, but to be different one has to do something different. No one else I knew was flagrantly breaking the law and essentially staging a mild revolution whilst promoting the evolution of the legal reform with so many beneficial aspects with little down sides.
The fact that Colorado had been such a success with little if any down side only further frustrates the Green lobby or Marijuana users in other parts of the world.
One aspect of pot was hard to describe that listening to music and dancing whilst high is perhaps the closest I've come to finding some form of utopia or deep connection that really emphasizes what it is to be human and perhaps the highest form of evolution that really does set us apart from any other species.
Taking this one step further I am confident that the human body is synchronized and even best described as an instrument in its self.
Music has an incredibly evocative power over us but definitely heightened whilst smoking pot.
Listening to Jimmy Hendrix or Lenard Skynyrd with a joint is something I'd like to hope could be universally appreciated globally and legally one day and there are so many good songs and films supporting this aspiration that it seems hard to think how slowly the legislation is responding to the intelligentsia on this issue.
All men aspire to find a cause or an area for improvement and I really felt that pot was mine or perhaps was an escape from my own personal mediocrity.
In a time when life feels somewhat scripted with the marriage, mortgage, management standing for a cause and trying to evoke change truly appealed to my desire to live and life less ordinary.
The fact that I felt that it was the best thing to do with my time when 200,000 strong petition to Parliament was presented to legalize and globally the debate was being brought to the UN by Richard Branson, I felt it was worth me doing my part & needless to say enjoying the journey of rediscovering my favourite city with the slightly green cloud perspective.
I can honestly say this cause and this plant have undeniably seduced me for the last two years.
It genuinely felt like a fatalistic calling, almost dangerously so, the more I was told not to the stronger my resolve grew. This is the undeniable truth for anything prohibited and a hard truth to face retrospectively when all the resistance was so well intended.
There is a real sadness attached for anyone who struggles with self destructive habits who have friends and family who attempt to help by denying access to the vice in question and who struggle with this concept of logic or lack there of.
Like all great struggles this felt like an almost self sacrifice to the cause with the reality that there will one day be a last man tried and hanged in the gallows of The Tower of London so to will there be the last man arrested for smoking pot.
I will openly admit I did not want to go that far and don't feel the criminal record would be worth while or helpful in any capacity so I will admit I did not push things that far and didn’t plan on doing so.
That would merely be a Darwinian award for stupidity hence why now writing a book is more my style.
I made some considerable mistakes whilst advocating the use of and legalization of this plant.
Perhaps the cliché of drug use and addiction was more my battle than the advocacy of the plant itself. Perhaps as a marijuana user I had missed the vital reality that anyone seen to be using drugs will not be taken seriously regarding advocacy due to the self-interest and potential cry for enabling.
Not unlike a perceived alcoholic advocating the morning tipple a 'dope smoker' cannot be the primary cause for legalization even if he or she evokes sympathy regarding the punishment associated with the legal status of the plant.
I had to accept that I very luckily avoided the legal wrangling and very fortunately never had any legal consequence from my habit.
The issue of enjoyment and recreational pursuit was my initial attraction and like many others I have come to see the great potential for medicinal and therapeutic aspects of the plant.
That said the legal and social status has caused a significant rift
In my personal and business life it is with some regret that I had jumped on what seemed to be a great opportunity for championing a cause that I felt could have been the great battle of our age.
This all sounds very honorable and potentially political so hence the real catch 22 that most marijuana users face.
History is well documented and the initial cause for prohibition shown in 'The Union' documentary, which is freely available on You Tube.
In a time when climate change, war, economic collapse and a general meltdown of the financial system one can be slightly forgiven for seeking a vice to pacify ones anxiety.
Being born in the eighties with a constant mixed message of desire, fear, total glamorization of aspirations, material gain for conspicuous consumption's for consumption sake etc.
I felt the desire to take a different path and break the social convention.