I Do Not Fear Death
When I had you I was afraid to die
Now that you're gone, death is no shy
If he takes me today I will go with a smile
Let others cope and heal for awhile
I am selfish, yes I am that for sure
This internal pain I can not endure
If death take me today, next month or year
Death I am ready, and you I do not fear.
Take me there where my Lotus dwells
Make me float in the river that swells.
You Chose To Be With Me
Everything that I ever wanted in my life
Was for my Lotus to be my beautiful wife.
I've cried everyday since she went away
Wondering how I could’ve made her stay.
I miss the days when she would cook
I loved to watch her read a book.
I think about her every minute every day
My Lotus was just so great in every way.
Let's go to dinner! That sounded fine
She always ordered sprite but no wine.
I drove her everywhere she wanted to go
My Pretty Lotus was swift but never slow
She looked so pretty and smelled so nice
I got lucky when I rolled my lovely dice.
Flowers and cards, she loved them all
Especially the bright roses in the fall.
I could pick her out in any crowd
"That's my Baby!" I was so proud.
She’d smile at me and then I knew
I'd get to go home and be with you.
We had our own language and special words
to speak
Many new phrases and words came for us
every week.
Mine were dorky, she'd shake her head
But I always laughed at the ones she said.
How lucky was I to have her around here
I was always smiling when she was near.
She blessed my life with love and a lot of joy
Especially when she brought home our first
boy.
We loved to travel to places near and far
It did not matter if it was by plane or car.
She really knew how to plan all the trip
She willingly allowed me the wines to sip.
I now miss the laughs and all the fun
I still can't believe that it's all gone.
She was an angel in my mind and heart
On every step she looked very smart
She taught me a lot about how to live
How to love, behave and how to give.
Now I have to do all these on my own
But I feel she’s with me, I'm not alone.
Through the bedroom door I go each day
"Hi, my pretty lotus!" is all what I say.
Everything here reminds me of that dove
All the things I’ve treasured about her love.
Clothes, shoes, jewels and even perfume
All her used things that are in our room.
They remind me of my love for you my love
And make me smile when I feel blue and sob
I wish that she was still here with me
To guide me, love me and play with me .
I'd get her ice cream and rub her feet
I'd let her sit in the best recliner seat!
I never knew the right ghazal and song
She'd always help me when I was wrong.
Sometimes it was my purposeful gaffe
Just to please her and make her laugh.
Cooking was something I could not do
Cleaning the dishes I never did for you.
I could bring for her all things good
And I could make the yard look good.
Lakhan still wants to be happy in this life
But that's not easy without my pretty wife.
But for my every day that now goes by
My Saroj reminds me of what, where and why.
I wish that I could trade places with you
For all pain and suffering you went through.
She smiled and stood tall above the crowd
All the family and friends were very proud.
I know I'm dull and I cannot ever dance
I'm so very thankful you gave me a chance.
To try in many ways to love well and serve
I wish I could give you all that you deserve.
There was only one chance in my life
For you to be my beautiful wedded wife.
You were so gracious and giving for all to see
I'm thankful and glad you chose to be with
me.