The Way of The Fairy Godmother by Jennifer Morse MS PhD - HTML preview

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CHAPTER NINE

Persistence and Congruency: The Seventh Key to Happiness

 

The Seventh Key to Happiness: People who find success never give up striving toward creating their Deepest Desires in tangible forms that beautify life.

Intrinsically, the Way of Fairy Godmother is congruent. She invites us to be consistent throughout motivations and ambitions, words, thoughts, feelings, behaviors, interactions, the clothes we wear, the world we inhabit and our ineffable spirit. Every dimension in the Way of  the Fairy Godmother reflects congruency. Why is congruency important? Over time congruency, in conjunction with personal strengths-in-action, builds authenticity. Ultimately congruency and time, tied to personal strengths and Deepest Desires, are the foundation of enduring happiness.

When you are at cross purposes with yourself internal conflict drains you. It can, at its extremes, act as not just a thief of your harmony but also your health. The Fairy Godmother’s congruency allows her to manifest Positive Possibilities without limitation. Ironically  what makes the Fairy Godmother special is not that she is one of a kind. We are each one of a kind. We are each unique and precious. What makes the Fairy Godmother special? Congruency. Alignment across the dimensions of self-hood allows her to live her potential without limitation. This is the gift of the Fairy Godmother. She models this alignment of body, mind, spirit, accessible to all of us. When we resolve our discrepancies and emerge congruent in mind, body and spirit, we have the chance to manifest our Positive Possibilities beyond previous limitations. We may even interface with the Universal Law of Ever Expanding Beneficence in life. I’m not intending to say time and congruency, paired with dreams and visualizing a life filled with positive results, will provide us with a star filled magic wand to manifest magical events. Although truthfully, sometimes, I believe the magical events (not the star filled wand) are a possibility. For the purposes of this book, I’m intending to say when we’re able to transform an incongruity, we shift away from anxiety, move toward harmony, building positive aspirations. Over time, occasionally, seemingly magical events occur to facilitate our journey. Some of them we don’t even notice. This is the native characteristic of congruency bound over the arc of time.

From a human perspective it seems remarkable the Fairy Godmother has no limitations in being herself. She makes it seem easy to live dreams and manifest wishes and aspirations. The Fairy Godmother is not distracted by imposing her influence on others. She is not impeded by judgments or criticisms from society, family, friends or lovers. The Fairy Godmother is entirely free to be herself and to be all that she can be. She devotes her time persistently tuned to create Positive Possibilities. Does congruency free her from fear of failure? Is it possible the more we align with the paradigm of the Fairy Godmother over time the more beneficent hands of life open doors?

One dramatic difference between the Fairy Godmother lifestyle and a paradigm of contemporary life is the disease model. Modern life, grounded in the scientific method, is actualized through the lens of the disease model. Long story short, this means we are chronically looking to fix what is broken. Living in the disease model our future is at the mercy of our causal past. We are always trying to fix what is broken. We empower science, a force outside our personal authority, to solve our problems.

What do I mean by this? Utilizing the cause-effect modality of the disease model our history is causal,  predicting  our  future.  For  example,  you  are  unhappy  because  you  had  a      painful childhood. Add in fear and society’s scarcity consciousness telling us there is not enough money, not enough time, not enough profits, food, water, or help. From this point of view life becomes pretty scary. There is a place for causality and the theories of scarcity. However, imposing them where they don’t belong creates limiting beliefs and fear. Scarcity terrifies and fuels us. Is it any wonder ruthless, conniving, manipulative behaviors are the foundation of scarcity  consciousness? This world view may be effective for solving a short-term crisis or for building profit and creating a competitive edge. However the disease model and scarcity consciousness have little to do with the time and persistence required to build positive emotions. And that’s the bottom line.

A shift in attention away from scarcity and toward developing our personal strengths is the antidote to scarcity consciousness. Remember the second key to happiness: Focusing on harmony, health and success will bring more harmony, health and success. The Fairy Godmother did not analyze Cinderella. She did not identify Cinderella with a pathological label from the diagnostic manual only insurance companies, and a few people, can understand. In the causality model these diagnoses become our new symbols. Like clothes we wear, we also wear our diagnosis. We have already explored how the images attached to words and feelings create their own biology. In contrast the Fairy Godmother did not run tests or consult with her colleagues to explore treatment options. These approaches have value and their necessary place in life. Perhaps less often applied.

The approach of the Fairy Godmother to develop strengths and skills tied to Deepest Desires, over time and with persistence, will translate into making our life increasingly functional. The Fairy Godmother refused to view Cinderella as “sick” or “diseased” or “weak.” She perceived Cinderella with all the strengths she needed to initiate positive change. This is the difference between the Fairy Godmother approach and the disease model. She saw Cinderella as capable to make positive choices for her future. It was from this place of perception the Fairy Godmother began her work. She poured her vision of Cinderella, as the Queen she longed to become, into  the gap between where Cinderella stood in the present and where she dreamed of standing in the future.

Cinderella needed permission to accept herself for who she was, sweet, loving and kind. From this point of self-acceptance the Fairy Godmother invited Cinderella to invest the time required  to build upon her strengths while interacting with her dreams. The third key to happiness: We are filled with native talents and resources that support our Deepest Desires. Learn to use them in daily life.

The Fairy Godmother guides each of us to evaluate who we are by exploring our hopes and dreams. The disease model does not take into account the power of loving relationships and their ability to transform our life. The disease model does not factor in our temperament, character, talents, choices, and (dare I say it?) personal responsibility. The disease model functions well for disease. For ordinary life looking through the lens of disease we only see…..disease.

The Fairy Godmother engages the skills of happiness and living well. Her expertise is teaching self-love tied to Deepest Desires, utilizing personal strengths, over time and with persistence, to create Positive Possibilities. She demonstrates the unconditionally positive listening skills developed to discern Deepest Desires. She communicates from the heartfelt recognition of her own individuality, her understanding of the uniqueness of each and every person. She knows, outside the parameters of disease and sometimes within the parameters of disease, we have the power to become happy and fulfilled.

Here is my favorite part: The Fairy Godmother knows in the realm of the person-hood happiness and beauty are intertwined. (Now I know there are other kinds of beauty that do not encompass happiness. There are scary beauties and painful beauties. But for the purpose of our conversation, reflecting Cinderella’s interactions with the Fairy Godmother, we are speaking of the various beauties that dwell in happiness and vice versa. So don’t write me emails about the many faces of beauty, please.)

Let’s start again. Happiness lives in beauty and beauty lives in happiness. This is not the beauty we pick up in a bottle of shampoo. It’s not the beauty of dieting down ten pounds below our perfect weight. The Fairy Godmother’s beauty is not the attractiveness of chic clothing and perfectly applied makeup, or a magnificent tattoo. The Fairy Godmother’s revelation of beauty is a byproduct of her skills of living well, living within integrity, with her highest and Deepest Desires.

The Fairy Godmother cannot flourish in the universe of the disease model. While Deepest Desires can be attached to time-sensitive, task-oriented, ambitious goals, this singular form of interaction resulting in the frazzled, stressed, and grumpy people you see hurrying down city streets, is not the cosmos of creating enduring happiness. This is not debatable. Can you perceive the difference? It is the distinction between reflexively applying oneself to time-sensitive, task- oriented, ambitious goals and occasionally using the time-sensitive, task-oriented framework to realize goals. Enduring happiness is grounded in savoring moments of nature’s beauty, cultivating patiently the skills of building expertise over the arc of time. The Fairy Godmother inspires and promotes optimism. She is not superficially happy. The Fairy Godmother is congruently and supremely happy. This is unshakable, enduring happiness.

Do you wonder why the Fairy Godmother visits Cinderella in the first place? Maybe you have lived through terrible times and are wondering why the Fairy Godmother has not shown up on your doorstep. In my recent period of the Great Silence, I wondered. First, most importantly, think of all the years Cinderella struggled without the help of the Fairy Godmother. Just as Cinderella did, and we all have, you might be living the period of the Great Silence. Cinderella lived trapped in the Great Silence before the appearance of the Fairy Godmother. The Fairytale begins when the Fairy Godmother makes her entrance.

We can’t make an appointment with the Fairy Godmother. We can only cultivate an environment harmonious to the Fairy Godmother as our invitation. Beauty is a good invitation for a visit from the Fairy Godmother. The process of nurturing an environment harmonious to the Fairy Godmother might be the first steps we talk on the path to happiness. Our first steps to  living the magic of success only the Fairy Godmother can dispense. There are reasons the Fairy Godmother is able to make contact with Cinderella. All day long Cinderella thinks about creating beauty. She resonates at the frequency of beauty. Yep, our layers of symbols, over time, interact and form our attitudes concretized in our physical bodies. As a result we all vibrate at specific rates giving off “vibes.”

The Fairy Godmother is magnetized to Cinderella through her energetic resonance developed by persistently seeking beauty. Another reason: Sweetness is the foundation of Cinderella’s nature. Despite being treated cruelly she did not become violent or hostile toward her treacherous stepmother and stepsisters. Cinderella retained her capacity to love. She persistently loved. When the Fairy Godmother showed up Cinderella was vulnerable and humble enough to be awed, transported to a state of wonder in the Fairy Godmother’s presence. This is important! Losing contact with our unique and precious self we can be so despondent when the Fairy Godmother shows up and we do not have the eyes to see her. Jaded, some look at the Fairy Godmother and tell her to get lost. Or the Fairy Godmother shows up in different forms. She wears the face of our friends, a grandparent, or even illness.

We can achieve happiness and peace of mind. The journey involves the marriage of our Deepest Desires, ingrained into the fabric of our lives over time, expressed in our behaviors and by never giving up. By choosing the Way of the Fairy Godmother we share a common goal taking infinite forms. We seek enduring happiness. The process is universal. We claim positive congruency. We engage personal strengths that evolve into actions. Over the arc of time, we evolve to manifest the happiness we seek. The higher math of happiness includes  congruence and persistence. Look at Cinderella’s determination. Every day she cleaned and ran endless errands for her stepmother and stepsisters. While she was bent over scrubbing the floor, amidst her fatigue, she dreamed of her life as a Queen; loving and being loved. She sought the opportunity to pursue a course of action and learning with the Fairy Godmother, leading her into an inviolate circle of Sovereignty. Whew. I bet you didn’t think it was going to be so much work…

If her determination, reflected in her actions, had not infiltrated her behavior Cinderella would still be dreaming and cleaning. At some point we all have to ask the question: Am I ready to fulfill my dreams with their corresponding behaviors? If you daydream about happiness but fail to design a Proclamation, fail to climb the rungs of the corresponding Golden Ladders, your dreams will remain in the misty realm of the dream-time.

The substance of creation permeates every molecule, that’s every molecule! How do I know? We recreate our body’s everyday with the foods we eat. Want to see a life recreated? Follow a woman on a successful diet. In the world of the Fairy Godmother, can you imagine an infinite abundance of the molecules creating reality? Hold on. This is the shared truth of the Fairy Godmother’s realm and the mortal reality. What few realize and become accountable to is the never-ending opportunities to recreate our circumstance. It can be as simple as a cleansing breath and the commitment to begin again.

Scarcity does not exist in this model. Theoretically we can and do draw from infinite abundance, any time and for any reason, to create reality. That’s right we already do it every day. We are mostly unaware. Want enlightenment? Live Deepest Desires. Along the way we become enlightened. Our Deepest Desires reveal our strengths and our weaknesses, opportunities to grow and heal. What do we get from engaging strengths? Mastery, self-mastery. And so it goes, onto the next idea, formed out of the infinite stuff of creation. This is the reality of the Fairy Godmother’s world: Infinite abundance of the fabric of creation permeates all that is in form as well as the formless. And this is your reality too. Take hold of the strands of your life; purify, edit, collect, evolve and begin again.

Some will ask: Is it possible? Can we accumulate wealth without being ruthless, cold and calculating? Could wealth and abundance be congruent with love? Is it possible to make a profit without making enemies? Can we be successful and happy at the same time? Honestly I don’t know all the answers. I’m writing The Way of the Fairy Godmother to fulfill a sacred promise. I write to ingrain the perspective of the Fairy Godmother as part of my commitment to personal growth. Staying grounded in the ways of the Fairy Godmother I’m certain we can transcend the seemingly paradoxical.

Can we be successful and happy? Can we have wealth and humility? Can we have love and live our dreams? Let’s not give up. Identify Deepest Desires. Choose persistence. Develop congruency. Claim and practice with personal strengths. Grow self-mastery. Savor the beauty in nature.  Evolve  Positive  Possibilities.  Together  we’ll  live  our  dreams  and  have  our       next conversation from the land of unlimited well-being. Through persistence, we’ll find wholeness. Mingle strengths with climbing your Golden Ladder. Add in positive language to enhance Deepest Desires, recreating your biology. The Fairy Godmother urges us to find, renew, and release our greatness from within. When we identify our strengths and live them, this simple  shift initiates a loop of interaction, a beneficial and beneficent interaction with the world. Communing with Positive Possibilities, the product of living our strengths, we have a taste of the infinite.

The Seventh Key to Happiness: People who find success never give up striving toward creating their Deepest Desires in tangible forms that beautify life.