BOREDOM, HER INSANITY
Tola and I had been friends right from our first years at the university. We bonded after a game of scrabble and nothing could separate us. Despite our contrasting personalities, we maintained this understanding and unbreakable friendship.
I was an unrepentant introvert. I would rather spend all day with my head buried in books than to risk interacting with people, while Tola was the jovial one who couldn't stay two hours indoors. She always joked about how she'd run mad if she had to stay indoors for a whole day and although I didn't believe her then, now, I couldn't help but fear for my friend's sanity. Boredom was driving her mad.
Yesterday, when she called, we spent almost two hours on the phone. Most of the time was spent listening to her curse China and every other person she suspected for having a hand in the unfortunate pandemic that had condemned her to a life of "introvertism". And when she suddenly switched to a serious round of prayer, begging God to forgive her sins and just take the pandemic away, I knew something was way off. This one month had been beyond torture and she just couldn't take it anymore.
Personally, I was engrossed in a book I had been wanting to read for a long time, "God's Generals" before she called and although I truly love her, I just wanted to get back to my book. This was why when she called today, I let the phone ring for two minutes before I finally picked up.
"Look out your window and what do you see?" she asked me. As always, she ignored the conventional use of Hellos and went straight to the matter of the day.
"Birds, trees, houses, and sunshine." I replied, wondering what she was up to this time.
"Are you sure?" she asked again.
"Tola, I know this lockdown has started affecting you somehow, but please for the love of God, try to stay sane. I beg you!"
I heard her giggle through my phone's speaker and I truly began to worry for my best friend.
"Baba, calm down jare. I've not yet gone mad completely,” she said, still giggling.
"Really? So, what have you been up to today?" I asked her.
"Well..." she began.
"I woke up by 5am, sadly. I slept early last night and I couldn't keep on sleeping like I was competing with the dead. So, when I woke up so early, I decided to do something productive, like you're always telling me to do.
I went to the kitchen and washed all the plates. Yes, Tobi, I washed both the clean and dirty plates. I brought all of them out from the cupboard and washed them. In my defense, plates can't be too clean, right?"
"Sure." I muttered, wondering what else boredom had made her do.
"I finished washing the plates by 7am and I didn't know what else to do. I was just so bored. I decided to tidy up my room. It had been in disarray for quite a while. I brought out my clothes from the wardrobe and I took a careful look at each one of them and I realized something important, Tobi." She paused, waiting for me to probe for details, so I did.
"Really? What was that?" I inquired.
"Each of those clothes hold a special memory,” she paused again.
"Okay... What else?" I asked.
"My dear, that's all jare." she sighed.
"Okay. So, did you at least arrange your clothes?" I asked, hoping she managed to do something meaningful.
"Nope. I left them and went back to the kitchen."
"The kitchen? Why?" By this time, I was worried.
"You know how you've always wondered how many grains of rice are in a cup?"
"What? No. I never wondered. Wait, Tola. You didn't count the grains of rice in a cup, did you?" I chuckled, hoping to God she'd say no.
"No,” she said.
"Thank God," I muttered again.
"I didn't count the grains of rice in a cup. I counted the grains of rice in a Derica."
"Oh my God!"
It had happened. My best friend had run mad. Boredom had driven her off the edge.
She let out another chuckle and I silently prayed that she wouldn't have to end up in the psychiatric hospital before this whole pandemic ends.
"Guess what, Tobi?" she asked, still chuckling.
"What?"
"I got to 200 grains when I suddenly started thinking about the last time I went out. You remember that night in school when Richmond took me to the movies, right? Anyways, I was reminiscing about those good old days when I lost count somewhere. I was just picking the grains and dropping them in the plate before I realized that I had stopped counting for like ten minutes."
"Tola, your mum is at home, right?"
"Yes. Why?"
"Never mind."
I made a quick mental note to call her mom to keep tabs on her so we don't lose my best friend to insanity disguised as boredom.