MY FATHER
I confess with great pride that I remember my father often walking home from the farm with his dusty clothes, large old cowboy boots plus a whip on his shoulder in the afternoons and these now have become my reminders of the kind of man he was and how he kept us growing up in that farming environment. Among other things that he provided us, he gave us talents to grow with pride and dignity; he made us feel healthy in our body, wealthy in our mind and wiser everyday of our living. I loved to watch him work hard and appreciated how he managed his farming and family life with care and respect. I confess that I was able to fit into his boots by assisting him for various farm activities after I came home from school. I learnt a lot of things of life by being with him and saw the world by sitting on his shoulder, so to speak.
As a school boy growing up I longed to be strong, confident and meticulous like him. I am eighty and I am happy that I have managed to get most of his skills, ways of living and his talents to live my own life as best as I can. My father is in heaven now but I have my Lord God to share my joyful life and emulate all that are given to me daily by Him. Like I trusted my father for everything I now have faith in the Supreme Being who has the wisdom, strength and kindness to grant me all that I need and want.
The more I think and talk of my father’s abilities, his experiences and his teachings, the more I feel that I am a chip of the old bloke because I do have some specific mannerisms and ways of behavior that resemble him. I confess that I am proud to have some of his traits and talents but I wish I had acquired all of them.
Before my father passed away, he had given me one very specific information about the last and final ceremony after his demise. He wanted me to cremate him as we did to our grandparents and have no unnecessary traditional ceremonies after the final cremation because he believed that all those were pretence, sanctimonious and hypocritical (pakhand) hence, of no meaning to his way of life.
I followed his command and did the same for my wife when she passed away. I have instructed my children or whoever arranges my final ceremony after my demise to do the same. The final cremation (antim sanskaar) would be the end of my life and whoever is responsible for that should celebrate my life by sharing the day with friends and family at an organized feast at home to drink, eat and be merry.
I confess that I have done all the best to follow the commands of my father to make his soul to rest in peace in heaven. When I join his soul we will attain Nirvana, our freedom from the endless cycle of personal reincarnations, with the consequent suffering, as a result of the extinction of individual passion, hatred, and delusion.