Chapter 18
Love Letters from 1984
January 19, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
I apologize for not writing for the past two months. I have been so lazy to write letters of my spare times in the evening. Instead, I go to bed early because of this cold weather. But then, though I've not written to you, you got nothing to worry about, you're always in my thoughts and I think of you very often.
Hoping that you'll do something for us to get together this year 1984. I am getting exhausted hang in there waiting for you. There's a lot of things in my mind that I would like to do, but because of this type position of mine I can do nothing at all. You see, the government laws here doesn't allow us to change any type of employment. I hope you understand me.
If you're worrying about financial expenses I am willing to share it with you. Just don't hesitate to let me know. I am now doing my best for savings because I am serious about our relationships I do understand your financial problem. We must help and work this out soon if we really serious and Love each other. I can't wait for next year or two years it more anymore. Remember, of course I'm not forcing you if you don't like to do it.
My employer had talked to me concerning their trip to USA on January 29 to February 12, 1984. She wants me to go with them if I wanted to. But I refused on it because she said "with my own expenses" though she'll pay it first and deducted 200 and Hong Kong dollars for my monthly salary. And secondly is that, you said you have no enough money to travel to California – soon there will be no chance to see each other. To be going to San Francisco, Los Angeles, Anaheim, Las Vegas and San Diego.
By the way, how are you doing? Hope you still survived from the freezing cold out there. My love to your mom and dad and say "hello" for me. I Love you and longing forward to be with you and hope pretty soon.
Love, Judy
P. S. Sorry still have no recent photo!!
January 29, 1984
Dear Judy,
I was very glad to get your letter today. I was worried not hearing from you for so long. I am supposed to be the lazy letter writer not you. But I can understand getting a little depressed, especially about us since we lead quite a crazy romance halfway around the world from each other.
Believe me; I'm doing all I can to get us together. I applied for transfer to the Western Region effective in June. I hope to get a temporary assignment to Korea or Hawaii or I'll have enough money to afford a trip or bring you here.
I realize you're not totally happy in your job, just try not to let it get you down. Unfortunately I've been many places in life I didn't want to be and still am – I hate Detroit, winter and poverty and loneliness and have all four – I find thinking and planning for a better future keeps me going – let it keep you going. I'm doing well health wise and like my work which is going well – they like me and always give me very good evaluations.
Write often, it will make you and me both feel good.
Love, Jeff
P. S. I'll send you something sexy for Valentine's Day!
February 7, 1984
A nice postcard from Judy of a Lovely Chinese date with Chinese writing on top with. Pretty little pagoda roof and a Lovely picture on a sunny day with a blue sky.
Dear Jeff,
It's the first day of my tour.
I see the picture is the Doctor Sun Yat-Sen Memorial Middle School.
And yet it's fun. You know I joined in to the tour group so I am with three Canadian people and three Chinese plus the two tour guide. In the hotel it is a twin bed in the room and I'm sharing with the Canadian lady.
Love you, Judy
February 8, 1984
Again a large envelope I am guessing this is a wonderful Valentines card I sent to Judy because it's February and we all know that's Valentine’s Day month.
March 2, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
Well, can't wait for your reply to write you again. I miss you a lot that makes me feel like to talk to you. But you know, I have to control myself as taking up the phone to save money. So here I am writing instead. Hope you understand me.
By the way, how is your application for transfer to the Western Region or Korea? Any news about it?? Open will be approved.
Well, the family were back yet from there two weeks holiday and is expected – I was very busy during the last few days doing laundries. Because most of the children's clothes were all dirty. But it's okay now, back to normal and still have time to relax in the afternoon.
How about you? Your mom and dad?? Did you hear anything from them? Hope they're doing well and you, you take care of your health.
Enclosed are three photos taken in China with three Canadian people. There were such a good and nice human being. Especially the lady (Francine) in black coat. Whenever I lost from her site she always looking for me and then when she even found me – she said; they take care of me and that she had to look after me.
As usual my love and warmest regards. I Love you and see you tonight in my dream.
Write soon!!
Lots of Love, Judy
March 13, 1984
Dear Judy,
It will be so much more fun to talk rather than write. Hopefully it won't be much longer. I'm going down Thursday the eighth to hand in the visa application. I have all the information so it shouldn't take too long.
How would you like to come over in June or July instead of September? I'm tired of waiting and I'm sure you are too. I've been checking airplane fares and I found there is quite a difference. Northwest Orient has a fair one half that of an American or United – it pays to shop around.
Good idea saving money. I'll pay for the ticket but you will certainly need lots of things when you get here and the money will be very useful. I know you send money to your family and that's nice. But think of yourself to, you work hard for your money – you should get something you really want – me!!
Unfortunately my transfer to the Western Region was denied. But fortunately that disappointment at the time is what made me decide to get us together. At least here we can be together. Agreed there is very little travel here while most other Army Audit work areas have a lot of travel. I want us to get to know each other and for you to learn about America and make friends so that if we are separated you won't feel alone or stranger in a strange country.
But if you want I will decide together we can choose to work or live almost anywhere in the world – from Korea, America, Europe – it's up to us. When we get to move his for (Army Audit’s decision).
I just talked with my parents and they are fine. I know it will make them very happy to know I'm going to get married – they want me to be happy and they will be as happy as me about my choice for a bride.
You get to see something you're probably never seen – snow and cold weather.
Believe me, I must be in love to stay here in Michigan, I was almost ready to change and go with another government agency just to leave Michigan. But getting together is the most important thing to me now and staying here is the easiest way to do that, so I'm willing to stay.
Let me know if you would like to come here in June or July and if you have any questions please ask.
And like I said in the tape, I've got at least one job lined up that you should like, working with children at a daycare center. My good friend's wife is the assistant director.
Lots of love and write soon.
Love and kisses, Jeff
April 10, 1984
Dear Judy,
I got back from a trip to San Antonio, Texas last week and got you a little present showing some of the American Indian culture found in the southwest part of the United States.
Still haven't heard anything from immigration yet but they did say it would take months.
Lots of love, Jeff
May 7, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
Hi! How are you doing now? Well, I think I miss you much more and more wild days passing by. I have a lot of things in my mind to do only get together. I'm doing a lot of thinking about our future life together. I'm sure will be a very happy couple ever after.
Jeff, maybe you need to follow up your application. Because if you don't do it the people in the government might think that you are not that way interested. I'm telling you about this because it happened already to my friends closed – friend.
(Judy was right to check on the immigration visa. At one point I called up Omaha, Nebraska where Judy's immigration visa was being processed. And I asked well how was Judy’s immigration visa coming? The immigration official actually said to me, Mr. Weber, you need to pay another $50 for this immigration visa. Do you want to pay the $50 or cancel the visa request? Once again you see what idiots work in the government for the most part.)
Imagine her fiancé filed the visa for her year ago but it was worked out only lately. Finally she had her interview from the American Consulate just on April 25, 1984 and at last everything is okay now. She be flying on 4 May, 1984, she is bringing along with her wedding dress for their wedding... You know what?? I envy her because they'll be together soon and they are getting married. Unlike us we are still waiting.
Thank you for the present and being thoughtful. It was nice and I appreciated very much. I haven't where yet, because the weather over here is still not in good spirit to where some are close.
Well, it's midnight now I've got to go to bed. So till next mail. Good night sweetie and have my good night kiss!
Remember I love you very much and looking forward to seeing you soon.
As usual give my love and best regards to your mom and dad.
Please do write soon!!
Kisses and Love, Judy
P. S. Enclosed here are my latest picture. Taken last week. Hope you like it!!
May 7, 1984
Dear Judy,
Hope all is well with you. The weather here still alternates between good and bad. At least it has warmed up so no more snow but the wind was blowing at hurricane (Typhoon) force and knocked down a lot of electric lines. Give me warm. At least my electricity has stayed on.
I got my promotion and extra money right on time. I got very excellent job ratings (exceeded every standard). It's nice to get praise for a job well done. I never got very good job appraisals on other jobs I worked probably because I hated the jobs. But I really like this job and the people I work for. That is nice.
It seems like a long time since you last wrote (As bad as I am writing. I have no right to complain). But I will because I like to get your letters.
Still haven't heard anything from immigration but they said it would take three months and working for the government I can believe how slow things go.
Lots of Love, Jeff
P. S. Here's a clipping that totally agrees with my thinking.
I sent Judy an Ann Landers answer in her help column and it goes like this:
Dear Ann Landers:
This letter is prompted by "straight in Buffalo" and what her husband called a sleazy outfit.
While cleaning closets, I ran across a sheer curtain panel. I was about to throw it out when I noticed it was similar to the fabric harem girls where in the movies. I decided to put together a harem costume and try it out on my husband. After dinner last night I slipped into my homemade Kaohsiung, appeared in the living room and yelled, "Show time!"
It took a lot of courage because if he had laughter looked at me disapprovingly I would've felt like a fool. I wanted to be provocative and funny and add an exciting dimension to our marriage. Hallelujah... It worked!
The Buffalo husband who made his wife feel bad for trying to do striptease number lost something valuable that night. It is doubtful that she will attempt to initiate such intimacy again. A married woman, if she can, should be wife, mother, lover, flirt, sweetheart and best friend. If she succeeds she need never worry about losing her man.
– Many faces in Nebraska.
May 14, 1984
Dear Judy,
I'm glad I got your letter; I was beginning to worry about you. I'm glad to see your sexy as ever – you're very beautiful hiding behind sunglasses.
I did hear from the Immigration and Naturalization people but it wasn't exactly the news I wanted. They sent me an additional questionnaire asking all sorts of personal questions – like how often we write? how often we phone?, do you speak English?, what do my parents think of the idea?, when we got engaged?, and would I be willing to live in Hong Kong? I answered all the questions without telling them it was none of their damn business and I resented our privacy being invaded. I even had to send them proof of our letters which was easy since I saved all your letters – have to read them together one night. I was very polite to them since that will speed things up. Even wanted pictures of us – now they'll see what a good-looking couple we make. I'll keep after them if I don't hear from them soon.
Also they asked when we got engaged and I told them March of 1984. I don't know if the American Consulate will interview you but if they do you can tell them we got engaged in March, that we have been writing for over three years and you met through an introduction service. I told them I got fed up with pushy, aggressive, liberated American women and wanted an oriental wife like my good friend and old roommate who married a lovely Chinese girl who is American.
I like gentle, loving, quiet, caring, and easy – going (like you) and then decided to find an introduction service and correspond with the Orient. I told immigration I wrote to several women but after three months I was only writing to you and have been for over three years.
I guess the United States is real careful about fiancé visas because there are a lot of fraudulent applications – foreigners pay money to an American to marry them and then they can legally stay. Then they get divorced and some Americans then tried to do it again. The form they sent me asked if I had ever sponsored another fiancé before or had been married before. I can understand all their anxiety – America has a flood of illegal aliens – mostly from Mexico and Central America – living here it's hard to imagine the poverty and suffering going on in so much of the world. I can't really blame those people from trying to get here.
It won't be too much longer and will be together. Think positive – will be together sooner than you think. See and do all the things you want over in Hong Kong it might be a little while before we can go back.
I'll do everything I can to make you happy and really do love you.
Take care, lots of love, Jeff
May 20, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
Hope you got my previous letter. And I've got yours and sorry for my being slow letter writer nowadays. I don't understand why I've been getting lazy writing letters lately. But you're always in my thoughts and think about you most of the time. About us when we'll be together. Hmmm – I wish we are together now.
I'm so glad for you got your promotion just-in-time, and I'm happy that you're doing well with your job. Keep it up honey!!
Hong Kong definitely will not be retained under British government after 1997 so people are worrying about it and a lot of them now starting going back to their homeland, mostly foreigners and those Hong Kong Chinese people are immigrating to other countries such as Canada, USA, Singapore and etc. My employer probably will go back to Singapore on the last minute of 1997. The husband is a Singaporean so they'll have no problem moving back home. I heard they're planning taking me along with them also. But that would be impossible for now, I will be with my love one – you!!
Well the weather is so much better net now. It was very sunny for the last few days and we already had gone swimming on Sunday at the hilltop country club.
Thanks for the clipping – it was nice. Made me to smile, I agrees on it.
Till next mail, hope it won't be too long. Write soon!!
Keep my love and all the best.
I love you, Judy
May 30, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
Hope things are getting well with you.
I was glad reading your letter but, I wish that additional questionnaire they had sent to you was already your personal interview. Because someone told me that just two weeks from the date of your interview over there I will receive a letter from the Hong Kong American Consulate, stating all the requirements to be submitted. I hope to receive the said letter soon to make me feel a little better. I'm getting bored waiting.
Well, I'm not surprised if America would be very careful about fiancé sponsoring. I heard that a lot of foreigners are coming to America by Tourist’s Visa and then when they get there they get married to an American citizen by arrangements (by paying them money) so that they can legally stay. I have two distant cousins who did the sort of things.
I had looked over with your first letter to me and I noticed that it was written on June 25, 1979. But I received it on July 3 of the same year. It means we have been writing to each other for about five years now and not just for over three years. I've been keeping all your letters ever sent and even cards are well arranged in my album so if they will ever ask about it I can easily show to them as proof. I can even show to them now you're 8 x 10 photos if they'll ask for more proof.
By the way, what do you mean we met through an introduction service?? Did you tell them that we met already in person?? I'd like this thing to clear out with you so I know what to say to the immigration people on my interview in case they will as such question.
Well, I must say goodbye to you my love for now. Hope to hear from you soon.
My usual love and warmest regards to your mom and dad and keep always the most of it.
Kisses and love, Judy
June 4, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
A week ago I had sent the package to you for your upcoming birthday. That was May 29, 1984, I had sent one sport T-shirt and a short pants both "Fred Perry". I hope you've gotten it now and you'll like them.
Well, how was your school exam? Did you find it hard? Hope it was all okay with you.
How about your promised have you written yet to my cousins? Hoping that you'll fulfill your promised to get in touch with them. Because I'll be happy I think if you'll become friends. But of course it depends on you if you would like to.
I've been very busy during my off day for these past few weeks until tomorrow. I am working my friend and two cousins to the Philippine Consulate in Hong Kong Labor Department for their employment here in Hong Kong.
I get nothing much to say sweetheart, I guess to wait for your next letter. Open next e-mail I'll have a lot of things to say to you. Please write as soon as possible and mentioned about the things I had sent you. My warm regards to your mom and dad.
Love, Judy
P. S. Please send your recent photo. Your mom and dad if you have their pictures. I'd like to see them. Okay?
Enclosed is my photos taken recently.
June 13, 1984
Dearest Judy,
It was nice hearing from you so soon. I'm getting along pretty good but lots of little things are happening that keep my life exciting.
Now here is where the plot thickens. I just found out I will have a temporary assignment from the middle of June through September in Frederick, Maryland, about 500 miles from here. Army auditors usually have a lot of mobile assignments. Detroit is an unusual office – mostly we work at one place. Frederick, Maryland from what I hear is a Lovely small town about 50 miles from Washington DC.
I'm pretty sure I can get an apartment and save some extra money since the Army will give me an extra $50 a day while I'm there.
Hopefully the visa will come through while I'm there and we can sightsee around the Washington area which is very beautiful and full of history of America. Going there causes me some problems getting my mail, taking care of this house while I'm gone. And the week before I go to San Antonio, Texas again for three days.
You seem to know a lot more about the immigration process than I do. They didn't tell me anything about an interview.
Don't be bored waiting, Hong Kong is one of the most exciting places on earth; this is your chance to do and see all those people and places one last time. It will be a while before we get back there. I hope I can make it exciting for you here. We will be living a fairly quiet life here but then all we need is love, right!
The reason I told him three instead of five years is that I'm not as organized as you. I have all your letters but they are not put neatly in an album. Did not organize then I went through my drawer and found one from 81 and sent it in. I knew we had been writing longer since they didn't ask exactly how long, I figured that three years would convince them we were serious.
When I told them we met through an introduction service, I told him we met through letters – not in person. The immigration questionnaire asked if you had ever been to America and I said no and I said I'd never been to Hong Kong.
So you can tell the immigration people that we met through letters through an introduction service. It's always better to tell the truth.
You can keep writing me at this address. I will get my mail forwarded. When I get an address in Maryland, I'll send it.
Don't believe everything your friends tell you about the immigration process – they may have many different problems that don't apply to us – it would just make you tense and nervous – think positive. It won't be long.
Lots of love, Jeff
June 14, 1984
Dear Judy,
This is a document that will make you happy – and makes me happy. We are on our way though it will take a little longer, it won't be that long. I didn't know if you were sent a copy by immigration or not.
The next step must be for you to go to the American Consulate and make your application for the visa. When the visa is granted we can plan the plane ride.
Like I said in my last letter, I'll be in Maryland until the end of September. So I'll plan on getting an apartment there so we have a nice place to start life together.
I figure that by the time you get the visa, give your employer's notice of leaving, we arranged a plane ride, it will be close enough to the end of September that you can ship anything that doesn't fit on the plane here to Detroit. You will like being in Maryland, it's pretty and near to a lot of beautiful scenery and history. I'll send you my Maryland address as soon as I get it.
Keep me posted of any problems.
Lots of love and kisses, Jeff
June 19, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
First of all I'd like to say and wish you a very "Happy Birthday"!! Hope you enjoy and have a happy day. How would you spend your coming up birthday?? Do you do have any program to do?? Or just have a quiet celebration?? I wish I'll be there with you!!
Well, over three months now since you filed the visa and we have received no results yet. Open and be too long.
It will be my last extension of working visa on September, 1984 my passport will expire on January 19, 1985. And before I can renew my passport I must remit US $1,000 to the Philippines. If not, people let the Philippines consulate won't renew my passport. To remit US dollars we find it more expensive than buying pesos and send to our family.
We have no freedom to spend our own money because our Philippine government is trying to force us to remit 70% of our monthly salary. I am sending money to my mother and brother every month but I'm just buying the pesos instead to remit US dollars. Because it is more cheaper for me and I can save at least for myself. But if I can't leave before the expiration of my passport then I will be forced to reinvent the required amount of the government to the Philippines. I hate this Marcos policy.
I'm glad to hear you have more appliances filled up to your house. Though it's not new at least we can still use it and useful for us.
Well, until then, take care and please write so soon. My usual love your mom and dad and you!!
Hope you'll be okay at Maryland when you get there.
I love you, Judy
June 26, 1984
Dear Judy,
I hope all went well at the American consulate. I just got to Frederick, Maryland two days ago. It's nice to have air-conditioning and the food allowance. I have an address or can write to me directly. The address is: Jeff Weber, care of Days Inn of Frederick, 5646 Buckeystown Pike, Frederick, Maryland 21701.
If something really urging comes up you could call here and leave a message with the motel. The phone number here is (301) 694 – 6600.
I gave up trying to get an apartment and made reservations to stay here all summer. The schedule I'm on will let me fly home every three weeks. My first flight is on July 3 and I come back here July 8.
I'm a little tired and haven't adjusted to my new work schedule. I've been getting less sleep than I need, will have to improve.
I'm not definitely sure how long I'll be in Maryland; so far it definitely looks like at least the end of August and if there are any problems in the areas I'm working on and then through September. It's very hard to know exactly so I roll with the punches. Take care and write soon,
Love, Jeff
June 30, 1984
Dearest Jeff,
I have received your letter with notice of approval on your petition enclosed a week ago and yet I received no letter or notify me from American consulate here in Hong Kong until now. If I will not receive any words from them until Monday then maybe I'll go down to the American consulate on Tuesday and showed the petitioner's approval to them and apply for a visa.
I noticed that the petitions approval is valid only for four months. It was approved on May 9, 1984 so nearly 2 months now since it has been approved. I don't know how long it will take to process the papers here in Hong Kong after applying the visa. I also have to go for medical examination.
How are you doing out there in Maryland? I am expecting you to write me soon with your address from there so in case I need some documents or any papers from you that I can write to you directly. For the time being, I'm getting ready all the necessary papers that to be submitted to the American consulate.
Do you mind dropping a few lines to my mother? Tell her about us, our plans and of course you introduce yourself to her first. Though I've been mentioning to her about you, it would be nice and the little respectful if you'll send her a few sentences. And enclose a copy of your photos if you have any. Please do for me sweetheart!! Okay?? I'll be very glad if you could do it. I got no more father so all the affections which should be for dad goes all to my mom.
Bye for now and take care. Hope you write soon and let me know how you are doing at Maryland.
My love and warmest regards to your mom and dad. Miss you so much!!
Kisses and love, Judy
P. S. This is my mother's address!
Mrs. Lucena B. Bautista
Cabangila, Altavas
Aklan, Philippines
July 17, 1984
Dear Judy,
I'm sending a letter to your mom but in your next letter please print or type the address. On words I know I can read your handwriting but on the address I had to guess and I guessed:
Mrs. Lucena Bautista
Cabangila Altaras
Akfan, Philippines
If that was not a good guess then mom will not get the letter. (Better idea, I'm sending you the letter and you mail to mom and then tell me if I have the right address). But I will be smart and make a copy.
Again I give Judy my address in Maryland and my phone number which haven't changed.
I'm going to call the Immigration and Naturalization people and ask them some questions – well I asked him some questions about your visa and this is what they told me.
First, you'll need a new Philippines passport because you cannot obtain an American passport until you become an American citizen and that takes three years.
If we wanted to leave the US before you were a citizen we could. We could stay here in the US without you having a passport but we couldn't leave the country.
And you better apply in case we have some delays and you have to be in Hong Kong a while longer. Better safe than sorry. I don't want to stay in Michigan another three years or until you become a citizen. I want to go to either Europe or Korea within a year or so. Better to get the passport.
I'm going to write a letter you can give the American consulate. I'll ask them to write me if they have any questions or call. I filled in the form from the consulate but as you can see it really doesn't fit our situation. I hope the letter and form help.
Any other questions write me here in Frederick, Maryland. I'll let you know if I go back to Michigan.
Lots of love, Jeff
July 24, 1984
Judy sent me a nice little note from the White Swan Hotel in Hong