The second level is the need for safety and security, shelter and protection. We all need somewhere to live, a home that will protect us from the elements, an environment that provides safety and security.
Once we have reached this level we are now prepared to move to the third level, which is the need to belong, to bond with people who are like-minded, people who believe in the things we do and see life in the same way. Belonging to these
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groups we are more likely to feel that these people love and care about us. This group gives us self-expression beyond our immediate family.
The fourth level is the need for self-esteem. We want to feel good about ourselves and have others feel good about us. When we succeed at some difficult challenge we experience deep feelings of satisfaction.
At the highest level Maslow says our need is to self-actualize. In developed nations we have the luxury of being able to strive for the higher levels in this hierarchy.
At the higher level we become creative because we are free to develop our gifts and talents, to write, to sing, to paint, to concentrate on the spiritual aspects of life. To reach this pinnacle we must make full use of our potential. This is living life to the max.
Characteristics of Self-Actualizing People
For those who reach this level, Maslow’s research showed that these people had similar characteristics, habits and actions. Self-actualizing people can be identified by the following characteristics.
These people can see reality for what it is. They have the ability to separate their hopes, fears, anxieties and theories from what is real.
They are people who have been able to accept weaknesses and imperfections in themselves and other people. They consider weaknesses to be a part of human nature. They see them as a part of the growing process and so they allow people to be themselves. They do not get upset or disturbed because of other people’s behavior.
These people are naturally spontaneous and open with their feelings. They avoid pretence although they do act tactfully in areas that might hurt other people’s feelings.
Self-actualizing people do not need permission to laugh. They have a well-developed sense of humour. Laughter is spontaneous and they are prepared to laugh at themselves. They see certain foolishness in taking themselves or life too seriously.
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These people are solution-focused rather than ego-centered. They see the world outside themselves rather than within themselves. They normally have some mission in life or some higher task to fulfill. Actions are based on the deeper issues of life that may center around religious, philosophical, social, or ethical issues. This gives them a defined purpose for life.
They do not depend on others for their security and satisfaction. Their security comes from within. They do like moments of solitude and privacy as this allows them time to meditate and think about the important issues of life.
They are self-starters, and control where possible, their own destiny. They have a level of humility that enables them to learn from anybody who has something worthwhile to teach them.
They have the ability to see newness in the ordinary events of life. Sunsets can be enjoyed over and over again. There is newness in flowers, food, weather, nature, relationships, etc.
These people generally have deeper and stronger relationships. Although their friendships are more intense, they are fewer in number. They have many associates but very few true friends because, in some ways, they expect more of friendship than other people do. Friendships are built regardless of class, education, and political belief, color or race, they are not xenophobic, that is they do not fear people from other countries.
Ethical behavior plays a large role in self-actualizing people. They have a clear concept of what is right and wrong. In general, their principles are ethically based, and although they may be religious they may not be what some would call
‘orthodox’.
Maslow labelled these people ‘The Peakers’ - those who have peak experiences in life. These peak experiences generate intense feelings of achievement, success, and passion. They are likely to be felt when something of value has been achieved, when one’s creative abilities have moved to a higher level. It may be in areas like leadership, sport, religion, intimate friendships, music and art. These conclusions have made Maslow’s teachings important in the area of personal development and human performance.
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Competition in Life
We live in a very competitive world. Everybody seems to be competing with someone at some level. Each week we spend hours playing or watching others compete in sporting activities all over the world. We cannot help being impressed by the level of excellence that these people achieve.
In sport and business, competition encourages excellence in performance. Where there is no competition, improvement in performance is less likely. We have lived through an era where governments have held monopolies in business. With no competition from free enterprise, services deteriorate. Monopolies create sloppy business practices, less innovation and higher prices. Business performs better with competition. Costs and prices decrease. Some level of competition is necessary in all aspects of life.
The following story makes this point.
As two friends are hiking in the forest they encounter a huge, ferocious and obviously hungry Grizzly Bear. Its next meal has just come into sight, and they are it! The first friend calculates that the bear will overtake them in 27.3 seconds.
At that point, she panics; realizing there is no escape. She faces her friend, with the fear of death in her eyes. To her amazement, she observes that her friend is not scared at all. To the contrary, her friend is quickly but calmly taking off her hiking boots and putting on jogging shoes. “What do you think you’re doing?”
the first hiker says to her companion, “You’ll never be able to outrun that grizzly.” “That’s true,” says the companion, “but all I have to do is outrun you.”
We all compete when the motivation is strong enough. However, competition is not the real purpose of life. Fulfilling the measure of our creation can only be achieved individually. We are not in competition with any other person, so we do not have to compare ourselves with others. We do not have to become discouraged because we think that someone else is better than we are in a particular area. The essence of our being is equal to that of any other person.
There is only one person that can fulfill our role and that is us. This means that others cannot beat us to the finish line because there is no race. This is not to say that others do not have a similar role to us, but it is never the same. This is important to understand if we are going to enjoy life. Every human being is
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unique and cannot be duplicated. In this, I am not referring to the body, only to the spirit, soul, or the essence of a person.
Nature and Environment
The great debate that has taken place for many years among psychologists and others interested in human behavior is that of ‘nature versus nurture’. Or, in other words, “Are we born a certain way or does our environment determine what we are?”
The answer to this question helps to explain the motivation behind human behavior.
The middle ground is that nature and nurture influence behavior. On the one hand we are genetically predisposed to act a certain way. On the other hand our environment will set the stage for the play. For example, one person may eat without restraint and never put on weight, while another person will put on weight just by looking at food. The latter is genetically predisposed to putting on weight; however, this does not mean they have no choice in the matter. People like that can decide to be moderate in their eating habits (oh, but the food looks so good!) It is much harder for them because of their genetic make-up, but it is not impossible. A level of discipline is required to achieve this.
You might conclude that this is unfair. Why should skinny people be able to eat whatever they like and you cannot? The fairness is that skinny people have other predispositions that they are struggling with, things you do not have to worry about. We all have predispositions in some form. Life always sees that we have problems to work through.
The real issue is to what degree genetics and environment influence our behavior. This has not been satisfactorily answered.
The Eagle School
In business the example is often used of the eagle school. If you send a duck along to the eagle school for an intensive training course, will the duck graduate as an eagle? There are those who believe in the affirmative while others, the negative. In my opinion the duck will never become an eagle, no matter how
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many eagle schools it may attend. It may even be taught how to act like an eagle, but the duck would only be masquerading as an eagle. The measure of its creation is to be a duck. It does not have the killer instinct of the eagle, nor its eyesight or speed. It is not and never will be carrion, i.e. a dead meat eater. It does not eat the flesh of dead or dying animals. Its diet is mainly plant life.
The middle ground is, “No, the duck will never become an eagle but it will become a better duck.” Well, maybe, but would it not be better for the duck to go to the duck school where it can be taught how to become a better duck? There would be no acting then. The duck would be learning how to fulfill the measure of its creation.
What duck wants to kill? Who says the duck has to be an eagle anyway? This presupposes that the eagle is superior to the duck. In some ways it may be. In other ways it is not. It depends on where you are. The eagle may be faster in the air but the duck is faster in the water. In the world of birds, all are necessary.
Each playing their role, so it is with humanity.
As the maxim says, “Whate’er thou art, act well thy part.” We all are a part of the whole and you cannot have the whole without all of its parts.
We Are All One
Someone famous once said, “Inasmuch as ye do it to the least of these my brethren ye have done it unto me.”
This idea comes from a lofty source. It teaches us that there is a unity within humanity and that you cannot do something to someone without it affecting all.
You cannot hurt the powerless without it affecting the powerful. Whatever you do to another person is but another stroke on the canvas of your life.
Another way of explaining this may be to consider the building industry. For a home to be built there is a succession of actions that must take place. Footings must be poured before the bricklayer can lay bricks. The walls must go up before the roof can go on, etc. When a supplier or tradesperson fails to complete a necessary task by the agreed time, this then affects every other person involved with the project.
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If one gets behind everybody gets behind. You were supposed to move into your new home by Christmas. It did not happen until February. The action of one affects all. Does it stop there? Of course not, future projects will be affected and dates for completion will be moved back.
Everybody is needed and each plays a vital role in the experience we call life.
We are all at different levels of our development. Some of us are seedlings, others grand oak trees, but every level is needed. We should remember that the grand oak tree was once a seedling. Therefore, to be in harmony with all, you must allow all to be at the level they are at. You cannot take a seedling and expect it to act like a grand oak tree. It is just not possible. It has to go through the growing process. There is no other way. The role of each oak is to assist the seedling through the process. I should quickly add, only if the seedling wants to be assisted.
Wherever we are and whoever we are, the purpose of our life is to rise to the measure of our creation. This is the great challenge of life, to understand our role and our purpose. It is only by fulfilling this that we experience what Joseph Campbell and others have called our ‘bliss’.
The Grand Design
It seems to me that we can view life in at least two ways. Firstly there is a grand design to our creation and we play an important role in this design. If so, no other person can fulfill our role. Every thing and every person has a place and a purpose. This is what makes us unique amongst all of creation.
An alternative theory is that life is a series of accidents. Things happen randomly without rhyme or reason. Where you are positioned is the luck of the draw. It is either good luck or bad luck. You do not have any control over life. You just wait for the next accident to occur.
The word ‘accident’ had to have been invented by someone who could not explain or understand why a certain thing occurred. Accidents never just happen, they are caused. If you do not know the cause of an event or were not expecting it to happen then you label it an accident or a coincidence. Life takes on a new meaning when we come to know that there are no accidents, only experiences.
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There is a grand design for our existence and we do have control over much of what we do, therefore make a decision to live life with excitement and energy and join the maxers.
The Fifth Child
Let me share with you an experience from my own life to make this point. You may think it was an accident, many have. However, for my family and me, it was not an accident but part of the grand design. It was an experience that was necessary for us to have.
It was about 2.30 pm, 26 October 1978. I was driving to the Burwood Private Hospital. I had been informed that my wife, Yvonne, was now in labor. I was in a reflective mood due to Yvonne’s difficult pregnancy but I still felt that all would be well. It was my wife’s birthday and she was being induced.
At 3:05 pm Bonnie Jo was born. I immediately detected features different from our other children, more noticeable almond-shaped eyes and a moon-shaped face. My wife was informed that she had a little girl as the nurse began to clean her up. My wife was then sedated and I left the hospital.
Arriving home I rang our doctor whose first words to me were, “I think we have a problem”. He was letting me down gently. I already knew that Bonnie Jo was born with an extra chromosome - she was a Mongol. In those days this was the name that these children had been labelled with. Down’s Syndrome has now replaced this word. Early that evening I conveyed the news to my wife who was tearful but accepting of our new situation. We explained to our children that out of all the children in the world, few would have such a remarkable experience of having a Down’s Syndrome brother or sister. A few days later it was confirmed that Bonnie’s life expectancy was reduced because her heart was malformed. She had bi-directional shunting.
Well! Some may conclude that this event was an accident caused by one extra chromosome. No doubt the extra chromosome made the difference; but, for my family and me, we have viewed this experience as a part of the grand design.
These are fundamental questions that we all need to think about. Our conclusions will impact on the way we live. You may choose to be the victim of any situation or you may choose to be the blessed.
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To Reason is Divine
What makes us different from all other creations is that we have the ability to reason, the capacity to think things through.
Seneca said, “Reason is nothing else but a portion of the divine spirit set in a human body”.
Reason allows us to make informed choices based on what is real. Reason is the enemy of desire; therefore, desire will do every thing within its power to subdue reason. For life to have meaning we must allow reason to play its role. If not, desire takes over and conquers all with a passion that can be a curse or, according to the English proverb, “A man without reason is a beast in season”.
On most occasions reason and desire are at war. You must decide who will be the victor. We have been given the freedom to choose how we will live or, to use an American term; it is our ‘inalienable right’, one that comes with us at birth. It is easier to choose once we have worked out what our purpose is or the ‘why’ of life. Once we know ‘why’ then we can work out ‘how’.
Some people seem to find a purpose without difficulty. This may be because of who their parents are or what country they are born in. For others it is a talent or gift that may dictate their direction. The talent is the call, or so it seems. The age one is born into will provide different opportunities and challenges.
Some know from a very early age what they have to do in life. For example, Mozart played the harpsichord at the age of three, composed at four, and went on tour at the age of six. Haydn played and composed at the age of six.
Mendelssohn was playing and composing when he was nine.
In contrast, others never seem to discover their purpose. Sometimes we are like the man who goes in search of a light while holding a lantern. “We look too high for things close by.”
We have control over most things in our life and this is the way it should be. We are the architects of our own destiny. It is also true that there are things over which we have little or no control. You have no control over how you look. The sixteenth President of The United States, Abraham Lincoln, was not the most handsome man. He knew this but still saw the humorous side of it. In a debate,
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Stephen Douglas accused Lincoln of being two-faced. Lincoln replied, “I leave it to my audience to decide. If I had two faces would I be wearing this one?”
While we may be able to make the best of what we have, we can only work with what we have.
Our health is another area over which we do not have total control. We can treat our body with respect. We can be careful in what we eat, drink, and take into it.
However, even exercising moderation in all things, there are many who still suffer with cancer, heart attacks, multiple sclerosis and many other diseases.
We should be more concerned about the issues of life over which we do have control. We are here to progress and to succeed. We have the power to choose.
Whatever we choose there will be a consequence. We either choose to move forward or go backward. There is no standing still. You cannot even say, “I am coasting” as there is only one way to coast, and that is downhill.
The measure and purpose of our creation then is to move forward, to grow, to win, to excel, to be better when we leave here than when we arrived. Each generation should be better than the former, not in what we accumulate but in how we live.
My sons should be better than me. My daughters should be better than their mother. It is only then that humanity will rise to fulfill the measure of its creation.
The Mysteries of Life
Man has contemplated, in both ancient and modern times, the great questions of life’s mysteries. Who am I? Where did I come from? Where am I going? What is the purpose of life? What is beyond this life? Architecture has been used to teach these mysteries and, in part, reveal answers to some of life’s most perplexing questions.
The pyramids and temples, both ancient and modern, are of symbolic proportion.
One such edifice I visited in the USA had a series of rooms depicting man’s progress through life by a succession of murals. These murals portrayed the people of the world moving forward through time. Ancient, medieval, and
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modern man was illustrated in the garb of the day. These murals carried the mind back into the past and forward through generations of time.
Something of significance was revealed as one gazed upon and admired the painter’s skill. All of these people had one thing in common. They had no eyes.
They were blind to the mysteries and purposes of life. They were the sleepwalkers or the living dead. They lived their whole lives without knowing who they really were and what the purpose of life was.
This concept is understood within most of the great spiritual movements of the world. To have one’s eyes opened is to be enlightened. The word “Buddha”
literally means “one who is enlightened”. What does it mean to be enlightened?
Enlightenment means that one has been given knowledge of a different order. In using knowledge in this context, I am not talking about information.
It reminds one, of the small Russian dolls that can be purchased anywhere. As you open the lid of one of these dolls there are a series of smaller dolls within.
You have to remove one to get to the next. Finally you reach the smallest or the innermost one. You can only reach this one by removing the other dolls surrounding it. The first thing you have to know is that there are others within.
This can be likened to the gradations or levels of knowledge. The process of learning is difficult and gradual.
Professor Lewes in his ‘Biographical History of Philosophy’ taught:
“To aspire to the knowledge of more than phenomena, their resemblances and successions, is to aspire to transcend the limitations of human faculties. To know more we must be more.”
Know Thyself
Self-knowledge is the most important knowledge one can gain. It grows out of self-searching, contemplation, meditation, observation, and reflection.
You may have already reached a point in your life when you have asked the question “Who am I?”
The beginning of knowledge is to know who we are. We must get this right to begin with, as this is the foundation or cornerstone upon which we build. The
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Ancient Greeks understood this. The Oracle at Delphi inscribed the words,
“Know thyself”. Edison said, “If you know a lot about everything and very little about yourself, do you know anything?”
As a part of our education we go to school and learn about the lives of those considered to be famous: the philosophers, explorers, pioneers, scientists, inventors. These people have shaped our nation and the world we live in. No one would doubt the value of this knowledge.
There is so much we can learn from the lives of Gandhi, Einstein, Napoleon, Emerson and many others, yet we devote very little time to coming to an understanding of who we are and what it is that has shaped our thoughts, fears and behavior.
We know little about our ancestors and how their lives have influenced us. Some of us know less about our parents even though we have known them for years.
They are just like sticks of furniture, always there. It is not until they are gone that we ask ourselves, “How much did I really know about my father or mother?
I wish they were here now so I could get to know them better. There are lots of questions that I would like to ask them.” In getting to know them better you get to know yourself better.
Knowing Our Progenitors
This idea of knowing who our parents are is very important for our development.
Have you ever read a book where the beginning and the ending of the book are missing? No matter what is in the middle you cannot quite get the plot. Or what about arriving at the movies late, you a