Most of us, most of the time, identify with our body, with our personal story (history) and with the various roles that we play. We become the internal commentator in our head, judging situations and other people. What others think of us, outward accomplishments, and what we perceive as injustices or grievances all serve to reinforce our separate identity. But is this transitory self really all that we are?
Look in a mirror. What do you see? Notice any judgments, positive or negative, you hold about yourself. Notice too any tendency to compare yourself with others, or with how you might have appeared in the past.
What you see today in a mirror is different from what you would have seen five years ago, or will see five years from now. But all of these reflections – past, present, future – are illusions. They have no more reality than pictures projected onto a screen in a cinema, or images you made up in your mind.
Become aware of yourself observing the body you have come to identify with. Value it as a “temple of the living God” (2 Corinthians 6:16). Give thanks for the opportunities it provides to extend love, compassion and kindness. But know that your true Self is something changeless and eternal, unbound by space or time, intangible but nonetheless real.
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The first of the Advices & Queries used by Quakers encourages us to take heed to the promptings of love and truth in our hearts. We are to trust these as leadings of God. [7] If love and truth have the same holy Source, they are intrinsically linked. Any thought or word or deed that falls short of pure unconditional Love cannot be ultimate Truth.
In every moment, I have a choice. Do I snap back at the person who I think has been rude to me, or do I look past the perceived attack and respond with loving kindness? Do I overtake the car which is going a little slower than I would like, or do I show patience? Do I take the last seat on the tube train when I don’t really need it, or do I respond with compassion?
It might sound like an unattainable ideal, but love is our natural state of being. The difficulty is we have forgotten this. We have lost touch with our divine nature, and we hold a mistaken image of what we are. From an early age, many of us have been told we are sinful, and so we act the part. If God created us in His image, then our True Self – our divine essence – is like God: sinless and whole. When we live from that divine centre, our essential qualities shine through and we can become channels through which God’s Love and Joy and Peace flow into the world. Jesus knew his True Self and his way of living embodied that knowing.
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We cannot be true to ourselves if we hold a mistaken idea of what we are. As long as we identify with our separated self – our ego – our concept of truth will be subjective. At best, it will be incomplete. What is true for me will be different from what is true for another. Truth at this level is a dangerous concept. Nations have gone to war in defence of ‘truth’. Religious leaders have launched crusades, held inquisitions and burned at the stake people who disagree with them. We need to be careful. We may have deep convictions, perhaps about climate change or social injustice, but if we attack the politicians and individuals who we see as responsible for these ills we risk losing sight of a higher truth: that they too are children of God.
Truth is not what we perceive outside ourselves. Each of us sees the world differently, through a different filter which is the product of our past individual experience. Since no two peoples’ perceptions are the same, no one can perceive the whole truth. But we can approach Truth by going within and connecting with our Centre. For the Truth that is in you is the same Truth that is in all others. It is that space in you which was not born and will not die.
Truth does not force itself onto others. It does not make them wrong. Truth is patient, forgiving and kind. Truth knows that the world will pass away, but It will remain, forever safe in God.
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How can we know if something is True? By letting Love be our guide. If the thought is not loving, it is not from God. If the passage from scripture is not loving, it is not True (or we may be missing its deeper meaning). If the action we take is not loving, it is not the Spirit which gave rise to it, but our ego (false self). Therefore, it is not True.
When I hold an unloving thought about anyone; when I approach a situation with a mind-set of ‘what can I get?’ rather than ‘how may I serve?’; when I fail to show kindness and reverence for another... I am not being true to my Self.
Of course I fall short. Every day I miss the mark. But the more we make space to listen to our Inner Guide, the more practised we become in discerning what is loving and true. At our truest, we are Pure Being, beacons of Light, mirrors reflecting our Source. This is true of every one of us. Indeed, there is only One: one Is-ness from which we emerge and which encompasses all. We are not here to serve our small separate self, but for the good of the Whole. The truth that really matters is Love. When we act out of love, we experience Who we are. And when we remember our true identity, it becomes easier to see ourselves in the other, and to act with love.
• Reflect on a time when you followed the promptings of love and truth in your heart. What did this prompting feel like? How did you feel during and after you did what you felt called to do?
• Now reflect on a situation where you felt moved to do or to say something, but did not follow the leading. How did you feel afterwards? With hindsight, how might you have felt if you had followed the leading?
• What does it mean to you to be true to your Self? Can you recall situations where remaining true to your Self has put you in conflict with friends, family members or society at large? What might you say to a friend facing a similar choice today?