Peace is more than the absence of conflict. It is the presence of Love. Peace in our life situations, in the world, flows from an inner peace. And inner peace is a consequence of being true to our Highest Self.
When I hold loving thoughts and let love guide my actions, I feel at peace. The more deeply I am in touch with the wellspring of peace within me, the less likely I am to forget my Self and become angry when outward circumstances don’t go according to plan. When we remember Who we are, we realise we are perfectly safe: bodies can kill bodies, egos may wound egos, but Spirit cannot harm Spirit. We also understand that the goals and attachments which used to matter so much to us are not so important after all. Then we can be channels for God’s peace in the world.
“Live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is… one God and Father of all who is over all and through all and in all.” (Ephesians 4:1-6.) If we are all children of God, then when we attack another person with arms or words or thoughts, we are attacking our brother or sister. God is in us and also in them. We are parts of the same Whole, so in effect we are attacking our Self. Seen from this perspective, waging war is like hitting our left arm with our right hand.
~~~
Some of us may feel a calling to be peacemakers in the world, but all of us have a responsibility to practise peace in our relationships with family, colleagues and people we meet.
While I identify as my small separated self – my ego – I will not experience peace of mind or lasting peace in my relationships with others. The ego can never experience true peace, because it perceives itself as separate from others and as cut off from the Whole, and believes itself to be under threat. It is interested only in self-preservation and self-advancement.
When my ego perceives other people as attacking it, it responds in the only way it knows how. It defends itself by attacking back. I may not physically or verbally confront anyone, but I will hold ‘attack thoughts’ – critical judgements about the situation or people involved. The egos in other people react to this, returning like for like, and so the cycle of hostility grows.
Jesus said, “Let the person who is without sin cast the first stone” (John 8:7). Acknowledging our own imperfections may enable us to be more forgiving of others’ mistakes. Our own past mistakes cannot alter our true identity as a child of God. Neither do others’ errors affect the glimmering truth about Who they are. How can we avoid reacting to unconsciousness in others? By remaining conscious ourselves. By being present in the moment, and maintaining an awareness of their Identity and ours.
~~~
I recall a time when a supermarket sent me a voucher for £4 off my shopping if I spent at least £40. Off I went to the shop, shopping list in hand, intent on cashing in on the token – and determined also to spend as little as possible in excess of the minimum £40. When I reached the checkout and handed the cashier my token, she examined it and told me she could not accept it because it only became valid from the following day. I disputed this – the wording on the coupon was ambiguous – and I asked to see the supervisor. When she, too, confirmed that the token was not yet valid, I told them both that I didn’t wish to proceed with the purchase. I left all the shopping at the checkout, leaving the supervisor to have to load it back in the trolley and return everything to the shelves. Although I did not raise my voice or criticise the women personally, it is likely that my actions upset them and put a dampener on their day. Certainly my response was not a loving one, and it did not bring me peace of mind.
It sounds ridiculous when I reflect on this experience now: to sacrifice peace for £4. But in the heat of the moment I was convinced I was right. Had I remembered my true Self, I would have chosen peace instead.
~~~
In my twenties, I used to play competitive miniature golf. I also set up and administered an association to promote the game. At first I enjoyed running the association, and it helped me to grow in confidence. However, I began to have disagreements with other personalities involved, and over time these became increasingly hostile. What should have been a fun activity was becoming a source of conflict.
According to a Quaker legend, when William Penn (founder of the US state of Pennsylvania) asked George Fox for advice on whether it was acceptable to continue to wear his sword in keeping with the fashion of that day, Fox responded that he should wear it for as long as he could. Hostile relations with one or two people and my own attachments to things being a certain way had turned minigolf into my own sword, and after a few months of growing discomfort, I realised – like Penn with his sword a couple of years after his meeting with Fox – I could no longer wear it and be at peace. I stood down from the committee and also stopped playing the game as much as I had in the past: even on the course, I had made my peace of mind dependent on performing well.
In 2010, after five years of partial retirement from the game, I entered a major competition, the British Open, probably for the last time. My local course was staging the event. Even so, I knew that most of the players in the international field were more skilful, or at least better prepared, than me. At the time of the competition, I happened to be reading the book Good-Bye to Guilt by Gerald Jampolsky, which is based on the teachings of A Course in Miracles. I decided to follow a suggestion in the book and to approach the competition with peace of mind as my only goal. Regardless of how well I played or where I finished in the standings, I would enjoy the two days. I would not let my happiness and inner peace be dependent on my results.
Before each putt, as I prepared to hit the ball, I repeated silently to myself, ‘The peace of God is my only goal today’. I told myself sincerely that whether I played a good shot or a poor one, I would not let it affect my peace.
In ten years of playing miniature golf, I must have played over a hundred rounds at that particular course. My best score was 33 (three holes in one, and fifteen par twos). A more typical score for me was around the 40 mark, or perhaps a couple of shots lower with the rub of the green. On that day, though, something amazing happened. Without being attached to the results, my play was beyond all expectations. I found the ‘flow’, and three of the four rounds I played equalled or improved upon my previous personal best score.
The one time during the day when I lost the flow was when I let outward results become more important than my peace of mind. After a missed putt I became angry, took too little care over the next stroke and missed that as well. I eventually trudged off the green with a six. When, after a few holes, I managed to calm down and compose myself and got back to holding the peace of God as my single goal, the flow returned. In the third round, I finished with three consecutive holes in one to shave a further shot off my new personal best set earlier in the day. I had found my inner Source of strength. Without It, I could not have achieved those results by any effort of my own.
Peace is not only an absence of outer and inner conflict. It is also a positive quality, a manifestation of our natural state of being. I like this quotation from F. B. Meyer: “Joy is peace dancing. Peace is joy at rest”.
~~~
As I re-read this chapter, I am aware that in recent days I have not been at peace. Not only am I going to have to pay more for my pension, but I am also going to have to work for an extra eight years to claim it in full. On top of that, the chancellor announced that public sector pay is to be pegged back at one per cent for the next two years, while costs of living continue to rise.
I do not have a choice about these changing circumstances, but I can choose how I view them. As long as I identify as my small transient self, I will see my personal desires and goals – retirement at sixty or being able to afford to work part-time – as under threat. It is only when I still my mind and get back in touch with my Source that I can see things from a different perspective.
I am here to serve the Whole, not my transient self. My purpose is to let God’s love and peace flow through me, by being true to Who I am. Part-time working may be a means I have identified to help me remain centred, and so be more loving, but it is not an end in itself. The moment I become attached to a particular way, I have lost touch with my True Self. If I insist on a particular thing, or try to force a belief or a philosophy or a way of life onto someone, in that moment I am stepping out of alignment with Spirit, and have chosen against peace. I need instead to return to my Centre, to that deep place that is untouched by the turbulent waters on the surface of my life. There I come to rest, peaceful in the knowledge that all will be well.
• Reflect for a while on the things which disturb your peace. What situations do you wish were different? Who have you not forgiven? Thinking of people at work, or among your family, or acquaintances, who have you judged or held unloving thoughts about?
As you go through your list, hold each person or situation in the Light for some moments. See the Divine essence at the heart of each person. Allow the possibility that all things happen for a reason, even though they may appear to be senseless or unjust. We cannot change the past, but we can change the way we look on it here, now, in this God-given moment.
• For one day this week, hold peace of mind as your only goal. If someone does something which annoys you, try not to respond by judging them, but see them through the eyes of Love. How can we know what experiences the other person may have had, or how we might act given their experience of life? Offer a silent blessing from that of God in you to that of God in them, acknowledging that at their Heart is goodness and Love. Repeat this blessing before you go to bed. If you feel able, affirm to yourself, ‘I am a child of God. [Person’s name] is a child of God too. I am holy. [Person’s name] is holy too. God’s love for me and for [Person’s name] is One.’