Power Suit, Power Lunch, Power Failure by Lew Bayer - HTML preview

Chapter 5

PROFESSIONAL PRESENCE: Judge not…

Appearance is an essential element in how others perceive us and, more importantly, how comfortable they feel in approaching us and doing business with us. How do we dress appropriately while maintaining our own sense of style? How do we dress professionally on a budget? How do we look approachable in formal business attire? How do we handle casual Fridays, and what exactly does “business casual” mean? How do we dress around our clients to make them comfortable?

At one of Civility Experts early training seminars, (to spice things up and to test our theory that image and first impression preface skills evaluation), we orchestrated the following scenario with two speakers: The first “guest speaker” arrived to discuss the importance of following the guidelines of proper email etiquette. Professionally dressed from head to toe and equally well spoken, his presentation was listened to with no signs of disinterest. Everything from his polished shoes to a close shave were all signs of self-respect and respect for the audience. He stood tall and confident and spoke clearly and concisely. The group had various questions, which were answered competently. The group was visibly impressed and a round of applause ended the successful session.

After lunch our next presenter arrived to speak about telephone etiquette. He wore tattered jeans, a faded dress shirt and a cartoon character tie. His shoes looked as though they were worn on the last climb up Everest and Grizzly Adams would

have been proud of his five o’clock shadow. He sat slumped in a chair with his legs crossed at his ankles and his arms crossed in front of his chest. He mumbled

at spoke so quietly that half the room was blatantly ignoring him and the other half was trying to lip-read. His professional presence had the group dismayed and disappointed. One woman pointed out that his inconsideration of the group was apparent from the minute he walked in the room.

Sure, it’s not likely that a presenter would take things as far as Speaker #2 would- but you would probably agree that you’ve been in situations where it did seem that the presenter, or host, or VIP even, made little or not nearly enough effort to impress. How confident are you with your professional presence? Take the self– assessment and find out.

A. What you see is what you think you’re getting

The image we portray to our clients and associates involves many aspects of professional attributes. Our appearance and style are only a part of the equation.

Professional presence has a great deal to do with posture, facial expressions, gestures and subconscious movement. These are all intrinsic in how we are perceived by others. Here are some examples:

• Attention…at ease: How many times did your mother have to tell you…Sit up straight, keep your head up high, you’re slouching! The way we sit and stand gives the people we are with an impression of how we feel about the situation we’re in. By slouching in a chair or finding a wall to lean on as we conduct business, we give others the impression that we are indifferent or not interested or respectful of others. Our posture gives away how confident we feel, not to mention the health benefits of exceptional posture.

• Take a look in the mirror: Mirror, mirror on the wall are my facial expressions giving away it all? When in interviews or meetings, always consider the impact of your body language and facial expressions- often times what you don’t say verbally says a lot!

• Read me like a book: Sighing, finger tapping on the boardroom table, and looking at your watch for the third time, sends a message of boredom and impatience. If a person is speaking look him/her in the eye, take notes and give your undivided attention.

• Losing your cool when you’re hot: If you are unable to maintain your composure, take a breath and if possible, excuse yourself from the room or situation for a minute or two. When anger, impatience and irritation can crop up on you before you know it, reiterate the response or question and try listening or asking the person to explain. Remember you are a professional. If you feel your blood pressure rising, take a deep breath and keep calm.

• Oh, you really are listening: How many times have you wanted to wave a hand in front of someone’s face and say aloud “Yoo hoo, anyone there?” As a good listener part of your responsibility is to nod occasionally or say the occasional yes or uh-huh. A polite person will not ask “Is anyone listening?” so effective listeners should let speakers see this by sending nonverbal listening cues.

• Laughter is the best medicine…or is it? That uncontrollable giggle or a hysterical outburst of hilarity, even a silly grin, can trigger suspicion and hard feelings during business meetings. If the person you sit next to turns you into a grade school classmate, find a new seat if you can’t stop reminiscing. Sometimes, a polite chuckle during the client’s gardening story or knee slapping during the company president’s account of his fishing expedition are necessary, but be careful not to overdo it.

B. Groom and doom: Has casual Friday gone too far?

As times are changing and a more casual work environment has surfaced the question of what is suitable for work attire often becomes a discussion in the office. If you are setting the company dress code or finding the dress that most suits your corporate or business culture, casual does not mean carless. The way you present yourself to your clients, associates or co-workers sends them a message. This message can convey respect for others or confidence in yourself. The other side to this is a message of disrespect for the people you work with or equally unacceptable disrespect for yourself. That thrown together jeans and sweatshirt may be comfortable for you but if your client sees the casual dress as a sign of laziness or lack of time management, you won’t be comfortable for long.

Casual is fine, careless is not. Follow these casual dressing tips for a look that says comfort and class:

• Always remove your hat when indoors. Even business casual means your baseball cap stays at home. Hats should not be worn in restaurants, meetings, church, receptions or places of work. It is a sign of disrespect. EXECEPTIONS: Indoor sporting events or for religious reasons.

• Do not wear open toes, sleeveless or revealing clothing in situations where a sit-down meal is being served or if you’ll be in close physical contact with clients. This includes associates’ homes, weddings, special events, the workplace or restaurants. It’s just not good manners and you don’t want the focus to be on your clothing or lack of clothing.

• “Casual” includes: khakis, sport shirts, sweaters, slacks, blouses and skirts.

The kind of clothes you’d wear shopping or to the bank. Some people get casual confused with very informal or “play” clothes like tank tops, cut offs, bathing suits, gym clothes, yoga pants, or t-shirts which should only be worn around the house or for “play” and sports. Typically business casual means a tie is not required; however a collar is- as well as a firm fabric. Don’t forget, casual clothes don’t mean casual manners. Business people who dress business casual should remember that they will be in contact with clients who will make first impressions.

• In the business arena it is much safer to be overdressed than underdressed.

• Often when dressing, assess the role you will be playing that day. The level of formality depends on who you are interacting with and your responsibilities.

• Remember when accessorizing that the black leather belt you wear with your black pants probably won’t go with your white spring dress. Be attentive to current styles as many people interpret being “on trend” fashion wise as being on trend business-wise as well.

• Less is more when it comes to make-up, jewelry and perfume. You can make a statement about your style without being excessive. Most business people do not appreciate “trends” like facial hair, piercings or body tattoos, so don’t go out of your way to make statements or show off these very personal aspects of style. For typical business settings, hair color should be natural and neat and clean.

• Do not chew gum. It is noisy and looks bad. If you are worried about bad breath, brush your teeth often and carry mints.

Dressing properly is not only essential but imperative. You will be judged on how you appear and that includes what you wear!

C. Dress for success: Business dressing basics

There are no hard rules when it comes to professional dress. The situation will dictate style of dress along with the area you live or are working in, and certainly climate plays a role. For example chances are the dark, conservative suit you might wear to a formal business meeting in a downtown Toronto or New York boardroom would be a little out of place when meeting clients “in the field” e.g., with a livestock distributor in Dallas or a petroleum company in Calgary.

• Dress to reflect your position: The best advice, for the office, is to dress to reflect the position you are striving for. Mirroring someone who is respected and successful, whether it is with dress or attitude, can only help your career. If the person you directly report to wears a suit and you wear a pair of pants and a t-shirt, the next rung on the business ladder may be out of your reach. Time to go out and get a suit or two and change your image. The way you feel about yourself is reflected in the way you appear to others. Like it or not the clothes you wear will be judged by others. Have you ever noticed how great you feel when you take the time to dress appropriately? This feeling of confidence could carry you through to that promotion you’ve been waiting for.

• Dressing on a budget: Classic suits for men and women never go out of style and quality is the key. Trendy clothing may look sharp and make you feel stylish, for the period it is in style, but if your budget is limited, a few classic pieces will last longer and can easily be accessorized. Additional blouses, shirts, pants, etc. could also be added to update your wardrobe. Decide on what you need to purchase for your business wardrobe and do a little research. Often second-hand stores are full of classic pieces for those of us on a budget. Shop at times of the year when you know the sales for that season occur. Find out if one of your close friends who is similar in size would like to do a swap with you for a few days. You may also consider clearing out your closet of all those trendy, funky clothes in case you get the urge to wear those faded fatigue pants or that velour cowl neck sweater.

• Dressing for clients: Working for or alongside a company during a project or contract also dictates style of dress. Consider who you may come in contact at work and dress to impress. It’s easy enough to take a jacket off or remove a tie or some jewelry if you find you are too dressy, but it’s difficult to improve your appearance if you show up in a golf shirt and jeans where everyone else is in a suit.

Making others comfortable is something you must consider as you dress each day. Have you looked around the place you will be spending time in for the duration? Observe what people are wearing and mirror the person who you will be spending the most time with. Respect for others and for oneself is key. It’s not always necessary to completely change your image and buy a whole new wardrobe. Find clothing that makes you and others around you comfortable and not intimidated.

Appropriate footwear: What you wear as an outfit needs to be complimented by the shoes that you choose each day. Platform, open-toed sandals, sling backs or runners do not have a place in an office where suits are mandatory dress. For women, try to avoid dress pumps with casual pants and loafers with dresses. Comfort is important, especially if you are on your feet for extended periods of time.

Remember to always dress for success. As business people, there are times that the way you look can impact the amount of respect you receive from others. Be careful not to mirror the deportment disasters below:

THE UNDERTAKER: To onlookers, it would appear that this fellow co-worker has a part-time job at the funeral home. He is very serious and his attire is so very formal; always buttoned up and pinned down looking rather like an undertaker. Too much…lighten up please.

SUSIE CREAMTART: Suzie, Suzie you look like a floozie... Someone should tell little Miss Suzie not to wear her seamed stockings and gold lame blouses to work. And she wonders why she gets no respect, hmmmm!

STUCK IN THE SEVENTIES: This person is going to be 20 years

old forever. The beehive or the wide ties give away his/her glory days. The suit fit him 30 pounds ago and she looks like she’s wearing her daughter’s high school graduation dress. Help!

D. What’s your style? Maintaining a personal touch

When you look at the finished product, yourself, are you sending the right message to the people you are meeting? Your personal style is what makes you unique but it is the self-respect you exhibit that will make you a contender in today’s workforce. Follow these tips for presenting yourself positively.

• All that glitters: Whether it is the crown jewels or your collection of costume jewelry, less is definitely more. If the jingling of your bracelets could summon the ghosts of pirates past you may decide to remove a few. When dressing, try to find one or two pieces that accentuate the clothes you choose for that particular day. The colorful broach or them socks that you can get away with wearing with your suit, would probably be inappropriate at a formal company function.

• The sixth scent: You may find yourself being sent far, far away to another place and time, if the perfume or cologne you wear arrives in the room before you do. Teary-eyed companions, associates with their hands over their noses and lonely coffee breaks are probably indicative that High Karate Harry has entered the building. Tone down your sixth scent and find a fragrance that matches your body chemistry- or avoid wearing fragrance altogether if you know you will be in close proximity with others.

• The hand that you were dealt: Your hand does not need to reflect all the colours of an artist’s palette. Keep your nails clean, neat and well manicured and if you paint their nails, be subtle with colour choices and extras such as nail jewelry etc.

• Good Afternoon…I would like you to meet my friend, the razor: For those of you who do not know, facial hair grows 24/7 so even if you shaved before you went to bed, you’ll probably be hairy again in the am and so have to shave again. A five o’clock shadow at ten in the morning might be “rugged” to some but for many at work it’s just plain rough. Keep a razor and cream in your desk drawer and if you are expecting a long day a second shave may be in order. Remember gentlemen, hair on the back of necks, on the tops of ears and “Bert and Ernie” brows all need to be addressed.

Other tips for successful dressing include:

• If you wear white tube socks to play squash at lunch, you’ll need to change back to dark dress socks with your dress shoes

• Shoes should to be comfortable and fit properly. And, if the soles have come unglued and are slapping as you walk, for goodness sake find a glue gun.

• If the outfit you wear to the office can take you after work to the night club, no stops necessary, you might be wise to put a sweater over the sequins during work hours.

• Hair today, gone tomorrow…if you are still sporting your “Farrah Fawcett hairdo” (The “Aniston” for you Gen X’ers) you might consider making a change. Consider your occupation- there’s technically no rule that says only tattoo artists can wear Mohawks and orange feathers to work, but there’s a reason you rarely see nurses and bankers doing it.

E. Chapter summary

In today’s ever-competitive market, “business” usually means semi-formal business- in reference to verbal style, word choice, dress, demeanor, and etiquette. Business casual is becoming more acceptable but at no time are the following suitable:

Cut offs, tank or tube tops, baseball caps, sweat or windbreaker pants, torn anything is not cool at work. Let us also leave the advertising to billboards.

Slogans and statements are great at the beach but need to remain out of the office. Business situations dictate a professional presence and you are a representative of your company. The respect you feel for yourself and others is reflected in the way you dress, speak and conduct yourself.

Answers to self-assessment

1. False: Your attitude and speech style should be polished and professional at all times. Casual attire means only your clothing is casual.

2. True: Business casual means men should wear collars. T-shirts and v-neck’s are not acceptable. With the variety of shirts available with collars, there is no reason to wear a t-shirt. Please stay away from t-shirt that are for advertising purposes or ones that provide a statement or verse.

3. False: Your office desk is not your bathroom vanity. At no time should clients or co- workers be witness to your personal grooming habits. This is not gender specific, no exceptions to this rule.

4. False: It is in very bad taste to ask anyone where he/she bought something or how much an item cost.

5. False: Smoking is unacceptable when you are with clients and if the office has a no smoking policy you should honor it

6. False: Unless you are the person’s supervisor, keep your opinions to yourself.

7. False: It is unacceptable to wear formal clothes to the office unless the entire office is doing so for some specific reason. Bring the clothes with you or rearrange you schedule to make time to prepare for the function.

8. False: Check your company policy on harassment. In business situations commenting on the appearance or dress of the opposite sex is not an appropriate thing to do.

9. True: Common sense dictates that you should go to work clean, neat and professionally dressed even if there is not a formal dress policy.

10. False: Chewing gum is a very rude and unsightly habit. Quickly and quietly take a mint instead.

Conclusion

Good manners are good business. Success in business depends on many factors, not the least of which is professional conduct. Professional conduct consists of everything from how a person presents him/herself outwardly-things like attire, demeanor, and tone of voice or listening skills-and extends to how a person exhibits attitude, respect, care and consideration for others.

Modern business etiquette guidelines provide a blueprint for behaving in business situations. The growing international marketplace together with an emphasis on both education and communication skills demand that men and women in business today acquire behaviors that set them apart from the competition. An understanding of how social behavior impacts business will enable them to make their way effortlessly through increasingly technological workplaces with their self-esteem, sense of humor and professional reputations intact.

A little courtesy never hurt anybody. Courtesy can only increase your self- confidence, your client base and subsequently your bottom line. Good Luck!

If you enjoyed this e-book, please visit www.civilitybooks.com to download other e-books such as “Beware the Tablemonsters” for children ages 5-10, or “Pass the Promotion Please” and “P’s and Q’s for Profit” for adults in business.