Philip, Charles, & Anne pull up at the new villa. All three get out and are eager to see the inside of the villa. They can't see anyone, so they start to look around the outside.
After a short while we hear Ronnie calling out to them. Ronnie is a small time gangster with a large reputation. Marrying a famous actress like Barbara Windsor gave him great kudos.
"You come to look at the house?"
All 3 turn round to see Ronnie. Barbara Windsor is standing next to him.
Philip is taken aback a bit, not expecting to see someone as famous as Barbara Windsor standing in front of him, "Yeah, we.... oh, I didn't know."
Barbara, not fazed at all, she has a larger than life smile, she gives a little chuckle, "I know I get that a lot."
Ronnie is more matter of fact, "Do you want to take a look inside?
Charles whispers in Anne's ear, "That's Barbara Windsor."
Anne speaking in a low voice so that no one can overhear them, "No shit Sherlock. Who's the bloke with her?"
"Fuck knows. Oh hang on. Didn't she marry some wannabe gangster supposed to be one of the Kray's gang."
Anne, still whispering, "Wonder if he knows our old mate Charlie Kray?"
"It's only the ball shitters who say they know the Kray's that don't know Charley."
"Let's go inside, we'll ask him later."
Inside this beautiful Villa, Philip asks Barbara, "How come you're selling?
This is a beautiful place."
"It just takes too long to get here. We're going to get a place on the mainland. Costa Del Sol. We've seen a place we like, only 20 minutes from Malaga airport. It's got a lovely sea view and a beautiful marble staircase going right down through the middle of the house to the pool."
"Sounds nice, but one day they'll build a motorway up here. Then it'll only take you about an hour to get here."
"I told him Two & Three Quarter hours was too long to get here, but he wouldn't have it."
Ronnie wanting to get in on the conversation, and not wanting Philip to become too friendly with his wife, "What you two talking about?"
Philip always trying to be the diplomat, "Your new place in Malaga sounds nice."
"Yeah. We gotta move co's Babs don't like the drive up here. Them curves going up the mountains gives her the shit's."
Anne arrives with Charles, "Don't blame her they give me the shit's too."
"Were you lot come from?"
Charles jumps in and answers before Anne, "Streatham."
"Thought I recognized the accent."
Anne comes back, "You're not from south London."
Hoxton. Near enough.
Philip, "How quick you want to sell the house?"
Barbara, "We haven't even talked about the price yet."
"We'll give you the asking price. If ever the estate agent ever gets here."
Just then ROSARIO and MERCEDES the estate agents enter the room.
Rosario, "Hola. Como esta usted?" (Translates to) "Hello how are you?"
Ronnie ignores Rosario's greeting. "Give us the cash and we'll move out to-day."
"Bank transfer, or do you want it in readies?"
Ronnie, "You serious?"
Philip now has time to greet Rosario, "Hola Rosario. Can you arrange payment for this property today?"
"Sí, señor, I will be on the paperwork straight away's."
Ronnie, "You don't fuck about do yea? Right let's have a drink to cele-brate."
Everyone starts to make their way out of the house to the pool area.
Philip, corrals Charles & Anne aside. In great spirits he raises his arms, he has a big smile, "We just bought another villa. But this once for us."
Charles, “How much?"
Philip & Anne in unison, "Behave yourself."