SENTENCES
87. Classified as to their rhetorical construction, sentences are considered as loose,
periodic, and balanced.
The Loose Sentence is so constructed that it may be closed at two or more places and
yet make complete sense; as,
Napoleon felt his weakness, and tried to win back popular favor by concession after
concession, until, at his fal, he had nearly restored parliamentary government.
Note that this sentence could be closed after the words. weakness, favor, and
concession, as wel as after government.
88. The Periodic Sentence holds the complete thought in suspense until the close of the
sentence. Compare the folowing periodic sentence with the loose sentence under §87:
Napoleon, feeling his weakness, and trying to win back popular favor by concession after
concession, had, at his fal, nearly restored parliamentary government.
Both loose and periodic sentences are proper to use, but, since periodic sentences
demand more careful and definite thought, the untrained writer should try to use them as much
as possible.
89. The Balanced Sentence is made up of parts similar in form, but often contrasted in
meaning; as, He is a man; Jones is a gentleman.
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90. Sentence Length. As to the length of the sentence there is no fixed rule. Frequently,
sentences are too long, and are, in their thought, involved and hard to folow. On the other
hand, if there is a succession of short sentences, choppiness and roughness are the result. Page 118
One should carefuly examine sentences which contain more than thirty or thirty-five words to
see that they are clear in their meaning and accurate in their construction.
EXERCISE 64
Compose, or search out in your reading, five loose sentences, five periodic
sentences, and five balanced sentences.
EXERCISE 65
In the following sentences, determine whether each sentence is loose, periodic, or
balanced. Change all loose sentences to the periodic form:
1. At the same time the discontent of the artisans made the lower class fear a revolution,
and that class turned to Napoleon, because they felt him to be the sole hope for order
and stable government.
2. The members of the council were appointed by the king, and held office only at his
pleasure.
3. A society and institutions that had been growing up for years was overturned and
swept away by the French Revolution.
4. Galileo was summoned to Rome, imprisoned, and forced publicly to adjure his
teaching that the earth moved around the sun.
5. He draws and sketches with tolerable skil, but paints abominably.
6. Loose sentences may be clear; periodic sentences may not be clear.
7. He rode up the mountains as far as he could before dismounting and continuing the
ascent on foot.
8. They visited the town where their father had lived, and while there, procured the key to
the house in which he had been born.
9. His death caused great grief and extreme financial distress in the family.
10. There stands the Tower of London in al its grimness and centuries of age, holding
within its wals the scene of many a stirring tragedy.
11. Few men dislike him, but many would gladly see him overthrown merely as an Page 119
example.
12. Germany is moving in the same direction, although the reformers find it a hard task to
influence public opinion, and a far harder one to change the various laws prevalent in
the many German states.
13. Is this thing we cal life, with al its troubles, pains, and woes, after al, worth living?
14. He read much, but advanced little intelectualy, for al the facts and philosophy of his
reading found no permanent lodgment in his mind.
15. His coming home was very unexpected, because he had started on a trip that usualy
took ten days, and that he had said would take longer this time.
16. It was during the time of the National Convention that Napoleon first became very
prominent by defending the convention against a mob.
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EXERCISE 66
Combine each of the following groups of sentences into one well constructed long
sentence:
1. In highly developed commercial communities banks cannot afford space in their vaults
for valuables. Especialy, they cannot afford it merely to accommodate their patrons.
Hence, in such communities the furnishing of places for safe deposit has become a
separate business.
2. History should be a part of the course in al schools. It develops the memory. It
furnishes the explanation of many social phenomena. It broadens the intelectual view.
It gives culture as no other study can give it.
3. He never desired a higher education. This was possible because of the money
bequeathed to him by his father. It had left him no need for a great earning capacity.
More likely, it was because of the inborn dulness and lethargy of his mind.
4. New York is the pivotal state in al national elections. Its great number of electors
makes it always possible for it to throw the election either way. Therefore, until one
knows to which party New York wil fal, he cannot tel how the election wil result.
5. Our forefathers were devout. They were easily shocked in many ways. However, they Page 120
permitted many liberties in the application of sermons to particular individuals. Such
things would nowadays be strongly disapproved or resented.
6. Man's life is divided into two parts by a constantly moving point. This point is caled
the present. It divides the past from the future.
7. The Spartans were tormented by ten thousand absurd restraints. They were unable to
please themselves in the choice of their wives. They were unable to please themselves
in their choice of food or clothing. They were compeled to assume a peculiar manner,
and to talk in a peculiar style. Yet they gloried in their liberty.
8. The mere approach to the temperance question is through a forest of statistics. This
forest is formidable and complicated. It causes one, in time, to doubt the truth of
numbers.
9. They passed the old castle. It was almost unrecognizable. This was by reason of the
scaffolding which surrounded it. The castle was now being transformed into a national
museum.
10. He stood looking with curiosity at John Peters. Peters limped slightly. Otherwise, he
looked wel and happy. He was moving about shaking hands right and left.
11. They rushed at him with a yel. He had by this time reached the base of the fountain.
With a sudden wonderful leap he sprang onto the railing. There he was out of reach.
He balanced himself by touching the brackets which held the lamps.
12. The uninteligent worker reminds one of the squirrel on the wheel. The squirrel rushes
round and round and round al day long. At the end of the day the squirrel is stil a
squirrel. It is stil rushing round and round. It is getting nowhere.
13. The man looked at the ladder. He believed he could reach it. There was a sudden flash
of hope in his face. His face was already scorched by the fire.
14. Smith was financialy embarrassed. He was determined to get to his home. He crawled
on top of the trucks of an express car. The car was about to leave the terminal. He
courted almost certain death.
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15. The commander again looks toward the hils. He looks for a long time. Something
seems to excite his apprehension. He converses earnestly with the staff officer. Then
the two look more than once toward a poplar tree. The tree stands at the top of the Page 121
hil. Only its top half shows. The hil is on the east.
16. The most important political question has been the tariff question. This has been most
important for ten years. It is important because it is believed to have caused high prices
and trusts.
17. The pleasantest month is June. It has flowers. It has mild weather. It has a slight haze in
the atmosphere. These things seem to flood one's soul with peace and contentment.
91. The essential qualities that a sentence should possess, aside from correctness, are
those of Unity, Coherence, Emphasis, and Euphony.
Unity. Unity demands that the sentence deal with but one general thought, and that it deal
with it in such a consistent and connected manner that the thought is clearly and effectively
presented. Unity demands, also, that closely related thoughts should not be improperly
scattered among several sentences.
1. Statements having no necessary relation to one another should not be embodied in one
sentence.
Bad: The house sat wel back from the road, and its owner was a married man.
Good: The house sat wel back from the road. Its owner was a married man.
a. Avoid the "comma blunder"; that is, do not use a comma to divide into clauses what
should be separate sentences, or should be connected by a conjunction.
Bad: Jones lives in the country, he has a fine library.
Good: Jones lives in the country. He has a fine library.
Good: Jones lives in the country and has a fine library.
b. Avoid the frequent use of the parenthesis in the sentence.
Bad: This is a city (it is caled a city, though it has but twelve hundred people) that has no
school-house.
2. Avoid al slipshod construction of sentences.
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a. Avoid adding a clause to an apparently complete thought.
Bad: That is not an easy problem, I think.
Good: That, I think, is not an easy problem.
Good: I do not think that is an easy problem.
Bad: He could not be elected mayor again under any circumstances, at least so I am
told.
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Good: He could not, I am told, be elected mayor again under any circumstances.
Good: I am told that he could not under any circumstances be elected mayor again.
b. Avoid long straggling sentences.
Poor: The students often gathered to watch the practice of the team, but, just before the
last game, the management excluded almost al, and only a few who had influence were
alowed to enter, and this favoritism caused much hard feeling and disgust, so that the
students were reluctant to support the team, and lost most of their interest, a fact which had a
bad effect on the athletics of the institution.
3. Unite into one sentence short sentences and clauses that are closely and logicaly
connected with one another.
Bad: That it is a good school is not without proof. Its diploma admits to al coleges.
Good: That it is a good school is not without proof, for its diploma admits to al coleges.
Good: That its diploma admits to al coleges is proof that it is a good school.
Bad: This fact was true of al of us. With the exception of John.
Good: This fact was true of al of us, with the exception of John.
Bad: Edward came. But John never appeared.
Good: Edward came, but John never appeared.
Bad: The town has two railroads running through it. Also, three troley lines.
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Good: The town has two railroads running through it, and also three troley lines.
Good: The town has two railroads and three troley lines running through it.
4. Do not change the point of view.
Bad: We completed our themes, and they were handed in to the teacher. (In the first part
of the sentence, the subject is we; in the second it is themes.)
Good: We completed our themes and handed them in to the teacher.
Good: Our themes were completed and handed in to the teacher.
Bad: The stage took us to the foot of the hil, and we walked from there to the top, where
our friends met us.
Good: We were taken to the foot of the hil by the stage, and we walked from there to the
top, where we were met by our friends.
EXERCISE 67
Revise such of the following sentences as violate the principles of unity:
1. I frequently had ridden on a bicycle, and though the first ride made me stiff, I felt little
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inconvenience afterwards.
2. Of the firm Jones & Smith, Jones is a man to be respected. While Smith is thoroughly
dishonest.
3. John had plenty of energy and ambition. And it is hard to understand why he didn't
succeed.
4. I have taken thorough courses in history in both grade school and high school, and I
also worked on the farm in the summer.
5. In the East the people are conservative. But, in the West, they are radical and
progressive.
6. The news came that special rates would be given from Chicago, and that we could go
to Seattle and back for fifty dolars, and so, when our checks came, we seized our
grips and started on a trip which was so long and eventful, but as enjoyable as any two
months we had ever spent, and gave us an experience that was very valuable in our Page 124
work, which we took up on our return in the fal.
7. The town has a fine public library, besides there are a number of steel mils.
8. One may reach Boston in two ways. Either by water or by rail.
9. Women (and Christian American women, too) frequently try to evade the customs
laws.
10. My aunt has some of Jefferson's silver spoons, so she says.
11. He graduated from colege (I think it was Harvard, though I am not sure) and then
taught for three years.
12. This is one of Hugo's novels, it is very good.
13. He accomplishes everything he undertakes, if it is at al possible.
14. Washington was president of the United States. But Hamilton guided its financial
policy.
15. Every year they sel three hundred sets, and Mr. West helps to write the letters.
16. The country people were the chief patrons of the store. Although no smal amount of
trade came from the town.
17. The box sat under a tree, and the dog, which was a colie, would go when he was told
and sit on it, and no one could cal him away but his master who was very often cruely
slow in doing so, but the dog never lost patience.
18. He was one of those persons (of whom there are so painfuly many) who never do
what they promise.
19. He then went to his room, which was in the back of the house, to sleep, and his books
were found there the next day.
20. He was the man that I had mentioned, who had been recommended for the position.
Who had been refused because of his deficiencies in English.
21. I can't go, I don't think.
22. He was a very big and very strong man. And, he should have made a great footbal
player.
23. He wil surely be elected, I haven't any fear.
24. The food was good, and the service was fine, but we did not care to stay on account
of the weather, which was rainy most of the time, and because it was an out-of-the-
way place.
25. He converses inteligently and pleasantly, and never gossips, hence he is an agreeable Page 125
companion.
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26. He died of smalpox, and was ninety years old.
27. There were twenty boys in the class. Each past twenty-five years of age.
28. He is in every way honorable, at least so far as money matters are concerned.
29. I had not previously thought of going to colege, but now I was enthusiastic on the
matter, and al my time (at least most of it) was devoted to poring over catalogues, of
which I had a great number, and many of which I knew by heart from having gone
over them so often, and finaly a colege was selected which seemed to suit me, so I
went there in the fal to study chemistry.
30. He was very sensitive. So that we could tease him very little without making him angry.
31. There are a great number of stations along this short line of railroad, these, however,
do little business.
32. They stopped and asked us the road to Milton, and it was discovered that they were
going in the wrong direction, as Milton lay south of Wiliamsport, and we were
camping twenty miles north.
33. He wil most likely be suspended, it may perhaps be.
34. That day my cousin went home, and the next day John came to spend a few hours with
me, and in the afternoon we drove al over the valey, but neither of us grew tired,
because there were so many things to converse about, and so many long treasured
questions to ask, and John left in the evening, and then I went to bed.
35. He has been proved a gambler, there you have it al.
36. Mrs. Smith (whose husband had been kiled by a faling beam in one of the buildings he
was constructing) consented to give us a room and board.
37. He read his lesson carefuly, then he closed the book to think it over.
38. He is the most peculiar person I ever met—in the last few years at least.
39. I am reading a book, it is very interesting.
40. They get a great deal of amusement when he is walking (which he does every nice day)
by whistling in time with his steps.
41. He gave me this book which you see, and I have been able to get a vast amount of Page 126
information out of it.
42. It was noticed by everyone that he always behaved wel. When he was in school.
43. The magician was present. And pleased everybody with his performances.
44. Because he liked music, John was considered an odd felow, and his father was dead.
92. Coherence. Coherence in the sentence demands that the arrangement and the
construction of the sentence be clear and free from ambiguity.
1. Frame the sentence so that it can have but one possible meaning.
Wrong: He owned several dogs and was greatly troubled with the mange.
Right: He owned several dogs and was greatly troubled because they had the mange.
Right: He was greatly troubled because several of his dogs had the mange.
2. See that the antecedent of every pronoun is clear and explicit.
Wrong: The dog was bitten on the front foot which has since died.
Right: The dog, which has since died, was bitten on the front foot.
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Right: The dog was bitten on the front foot and has since died.
3. See that the word to which each modifier refers is unmistakable.
a. Place every modifying element as near as possible to the word which it modifies.
Wrong: He was sitting in a chair reading a book made in the mission style.
Right: He was sitting in a chair made in the mission style and was reading a book.
Right: He was sitting reading a book in a chair made in the mission style.
Wrong: The table had been inlaid by his father, containing over fifteen hundred pieces.
Right: The table, containing over fifteen hundred pieces, had been inlaid by his father.
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Right: The table contained over fifteen hundred pieces and had been inlaid by his father.
b. Avoid the "squinting construction." By this term is meant the placing of a clause so that it
is impossible to tel whether it refers to the preceding or succeeding part of the sentence.
Wrong: It would be hard to explain, if you were to ask me, what the trouble was.
Right: If you were to ask me what the trouble was, it would be hard to explain.
4. Place correlatives so that there can be no doubt as to their office. Neither—nor, both—
and, etc., are frequently not placed next to the expressions they are meant to connect. See
§84.
Wrong: He neither brought a trunk nor a suit-case.
Right: He brought neither a trunk nor a suit-case.
Wrong: He not only received money from his father, but also his mother.
Right: He received money not only from his father, but also from his mother.
Right: He not only received money from his father, but also received it from his mother.
5. Omit no word that is not accurately implied in the sentence.
Wrong: The man never has, and never will be successful.
Right: The man never has been, and never will be successful.
Wrong: It is no concern to him.
Right: It is of no concern to him.
6. Use a summarizing word, in general, to colect the parts of a long complex sentence.
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Republicans, Democrats, Socialists, Prohibitionists, and Populists— all were there.
7. Express similar thoughts, when connected in the same sentence, in a similar manner.
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Bad: I decided on doing the work that night, and to write it out on the typewriter.
Good: I decided to do the work that night and to write it out on the typewriter.
Bad: Textbooks are going out of use in the modern law schools, but some schools stil
use them.
Good: Textbooks are going out of use in the modern law schools, but in some they are
stil used.
Good: Though textbooks are going out of use in modern law schools, they are still used
in some of them.
Bad: One should never try to avoid work in school, for you always increase your trouble
by doing so.
Good: One should never try to avoid work in school, for one always increases his trouble
by doing so.
Good: One usualy only increases his troubles by trying to avoid work in school.
EXERCISE 68
Point out and correct any lack of coherence that exists in the following sentences:
1. Chicken lice are troubling al the farmers in the state.
2. The statute requires that one study three years, and that you pass an examination.
3. He is home.
4. Rich and poor, old and young, large and smal, good and bad, were in the assemblage.
5. He both presented me with a gold piece and an increase in salary.
6. Tel the doctor, if he comes before seven, to cal.
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7. When the dog came on the porch, feeling playful, I laid aside my paper.
8. I only knew John.
9. The cart was puled by a man creaking under a heavy load.
10. John told his father that his coat