For Better or Curse by Alexis Jacobs - HTML preview

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CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

Manda sat in the window of Sierra’s living room, staring outside.  Across the street, Noah was loading a box of books into the back of his car.  As if sensing she was watching him, he looked up and waved when he saw her.  She waved back and gave him a weak smile.  He was going to do a reading at another Barnes and Noble store across town.  He had wanted her to come along, but she had told him she had too much to do.  Noah had given her a look that said he suspected there was more going on, but he hadn’t pushed it.  He was right.  There was a lot more going on, and she wasn’t ready to share it with him.  Manda’s mind hadn’t stopped reeling since the day before.  Just when she thought things couldn’t get crazier, she had gotten an unexpected phone call that had thrown her off kilter.  

While she was packing up a bag of Sierra’s old clothes, the phone had started ringing.  Manda had grabbed it and said an impatient “Hello?”

“Hello, Manda,” a male voice said on the other end. 

“Hi, who’s this?”

There was a momentary pause, then the voice said.  “It hasn’t been that long, has it?  It’s Daniel.”

“Huh…,” was all she could manage to say. 

“Surprise.” Daniel laughed nervously.  “Your mother said I could reach you here.”

“But…” Was this really Daniel, or was she just dreaming?

“I know.  You can’t believe it’s me.  Well, it is,” Daniel said. 

“What…what happened to you?” Manda’s tongue felt as big and heavy as it had after she had eaten Angie’s pepper sauce.

“I need to talk to you,” Daniel said.  “Manda, I’ve missed you so much.” While Manda listened silently, still hardly believing he was on the phone, Daniel explained what had happened to him.  After they had parted, he had left the city for a bit.  All he could think about was what he had done.  He couldn’t understand it.  He said it was like he was having a breakdown or something, and he had even started to question his faith.

“Where did you go?” Manda asked him.

“I went to my cousin’s in Manchester.”

Manda remembered how she had called every relative of Daniel’s whose number she had, hoping someone could tell her where he was.  No one had helped her.

“I wish you had told me,” she said now.  “I was sick with worry.”

Daniel sighed.  “Yes, I’m sorry about that.  I was a right bastard.”

“Aunt Beryl said she saw you with a woman,” Manda said.  “Who was she?”

“Oh, right,” he said.  “That was my cousin, Jessica.  You met her before.”

Manda wasn’t sure whether or not to believe him, but she wanted to think it was true.  Still, she wasn’t ready to forgive him.  “So…why are you calling me now?  What do you want?”

He paused for a moment.  She could hear him breathing heavily on the other end.  “I wanted to tell you that…I made a terrible mistake.  I’m sorry it took me so long to come to my senses, but Manda, I was hoping we could…we could pick up where we left off.  My feelings for you have never changed.  I still love you as much as ever.  More, possibly.”

Manda had played this moment over and over again in her head, like a favorite scene from a beloved film – imagining how elated she would be to hear Daniel say he had made a mistake.  He wanted her back.  But instead, all she felt was an overwhelming sense of sadness, mixed with anger.

“You abandoned me.  You practically left me at the altar.”  She wiped at her eyes, remembering that night.

“I know, and I could never apologize enough.  I don’t know what happened that night…why exactly I ran…but I’m a whole lot better now.  After much soul-searching, I know we were meant to be together.  And that’s why I had to call you.  We can get married, like we planned.  We could-.” He sniffled on the other end.  “We could start over.” 

Manda felt herself caving in to his feelings, as she always did.  Her heart was thumping so hard, she felt like she might collapse.  

“I need to think,” she said, finally.  “I need to call you back.”

Daniel reluctantly agreed, and Manda hung up.

Now, a whole day had passed and Manda still hadn’t called him back.  She wasn’t sure what to say to him.  Daniel was in London, waiting for her.  It hardly seemed real.  And he wanted her to come back to him.  He wanted to pick up where they had left off.  They could, couldn’t they?  The wedding dress was hanging in the back of her mother’s closet, enclosed in plastic, the yellow stain cleaned from it.  Only two months ago, all she had wanted was to marry Daniel.  How many people got the chance to recapture their best dream?  She thought about how much she had loved Daniel. 

But what about Noah?  She couldn’t deny having feelings for him.  Strong feelings.  But there was no guarantee that this thing she had with him…whatever this thing was…would even go anywhere.  It struck her then that she didn’t even know his middle name.  So Daniel was fate.  Noah was…faith. 

Manda got up and went down the hall to Sierra’s room.  She entered softly and went over to the bed where her sister lay asleep.

“Sierra?  Sierra, open your eyes.”  Manda raised one of her eyelids and stared into the brown orb.  “Can you hear me?”

Sierra’s mouth fell open and she let out a long groan. 

“Come on.  Wake up.”  Manda shook her shoulder gently.  “I want to make you breakfast.”

Again, Sierra just groaned.  Manda flicked her nose, but she swatted her hand away and rolled over.

“Alright, have it your way then.”  Manda got off the bed.  “It’s up to you if you want to sleep your whole birthday away.”

Sierra shot up straight.  “It’s…it’s my birthday,” she said blinking, a sleepy smile spreading across her face. 

“Yes, it is.”  Manda threw her arms around Sierra’s head and hugged her.  “Happy Birthday, you old cow.”  It felt so good to say that.

Only days earlier, Sierra had almost been killed.  Manda had thought she was dead for certain, when she had teetered momentarily on the edge of the cliff, her arms thrashing in the air.  But Manda had grabbed her in the nick of time, pulling her back with a strength she didn’t even know she had.  They had sat there on the cliff, crying and holding each other, with Nik standing over them looking stunned. 

Afterwards, Manda had almost drowned in guilt.  Nik wasn’t the one who had nearly sent Sierra over that cliff after all.  He might have been too controlling, but it was Manda herself who had nearly caused the fall when she had lost control and smacked Sierra.  The thought devastated her.  She had misinterpreted the details in her vision.  She hadn’t understood the warning from the Obeah man in Brooklyn.  He had been trying to tell her not to follow her vision, but let it follow her.  She had almost created a self-fulfilling prophesy.

When they had finally gone back through the woods to the cabin, Noah had been standing in the yard waiting for them.  Manda threw her arms around him and wouldn’t let go.  Sierra later told her that when she and Nik had reached the cabin, she was the one who had wanted to go for a walk.  She needed to cool off after her fight with Manda.  And so they had gone walking through the woods, the two of them holding hands.  Nik had been so quiet, she had wondered what was on his mind.  When they got to the cliff, Nik held her and told her how much he loved her and really wanted to be with her.  Then he told her something that broke her heart.  He said they could go ahead and get married, but only if she didn’t have the baby.  It was still early enough for her to do something, he had insisted.  He told her this baby was a ship, and it would only suck them down.  Sierra had been crying when Manda arrived because she had just broken up with Nik and told him she was keeping the baby.

But Manda no longer had to convince Sierra that her vision had been real.  She might never have believed Manda, if she hadn’t felt herself about to fall over that cliff, just as Manda had warned.  Before then, she hadn’t been able to even think about its possibility.  Sierra admitted that Manda may have had a gift after all, and the Obeah woman, Dar, may have affected their future with her curse.”

Now, aside from a broken heart, Sierra was alive and well, and her baby was safe.    Manda thought it had to do in part with whatever Darette had done in the room that time.  And Angie thought the oil she had poured on Sierra had protected the baby.

And after everything, Manda had thought Sierra would cancel her party plans, but one of Sierra’s gifts was her amazing ability to put on a smile and get on with the show, no matter how awful she felt.  Sierra’s birthday party was going to be that evening.  When Carmen found out Sierra and Nik had broken up and Sierra no longer had a place to hold her party, she had offered up her building’s roof garden. 

Later that evening, Sierra threw a garden party in the sky on the roof of Carmen’s building.  The party began when it was still light, so that people could watch the sunset from the roof.  It wasn’t exactly the lavish extravaganza Sierra had originally planned.  But it was a catered affair, with just enough glamour and dazzle to keep Sierra happy.  Manda had talked Sierra into letting Angie cater the party.  They were family after all, and Angie was happy to put aside her feud with Sierra.  She hadn’t wanted Sierra to pay the regular price, but Sierra had insisted.  She said it was her way of apologizing to Angie.  

Manda looked around for Noah.  He had been invited, but it was two hours into the party and he still hadn’t arrived.  She wondered if he was still coming.  She went over to the tables where Tee and Angie had set up their silver containers of food.  Angie flashed her a grin.  She hadn’t gotten Tee to change his mind about Florida, but they had postponed the move until after the Christmas holiday.  She was still convinced that Florida would young-up Tee again, and give her that baby she had always wanted. 

“I’m really going to miss you,” Manda told Angie, giving her a hug.  She would later have a vision in which she saw Angie laying in a hospital bed, holding a baby boy up to her face.  The baby was as wrinkled as Tee.

Manda smiled as she saw Sierra come through the roof door and gaze happily around her.  She looked quite pretty in her silky blue party dress.  Manda had made it in just two days, from two dresses Sierra no longer wore.  Sierra had loved it.  She was all too happy to put the dress Nik had bought her in the Goodwill bag.  Manda felt cheerful and light-hearted herself. 

The day after the cliff incident, she had gotten some good news. She had gotten a call from Antoinette, the woman who wanted to put her clothes in her Soho boutique.  They had just started acquiring clothes for the following spring, and she had seen Manda’s photos and said they were interested in getting some pieces from her.  Antoinette was also the buyer for Fleur, their sister boutique in Paris.  She wanted clothes for that store too, and said they paid their designers very well.  Manda couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  She had successfully convinced herself that nothing would come of the whole thing. Antoinette invited her to come in so they could work out an arrangement.  Manda said she would think about it, and Antoinette asked her to get back to her soon.  But Manda wasn’t sure she was ready.  She had a career in England to think about.  That kept her busy enough.  When would she have time to make clothes?

But they had a lot to celebrate.  Being alive and well, for one thing.  And by this time next year, God willing, she would have a baby niece or nephew.  It thrilled her each time she thought about it.  They needed new blood in the family.  Babies had a way of uniting people sometimes.

 “Hey, I was just talking to Curt,” Sierra said now, sharing her own good news.  “He told me I should set up another appointment and come in to meet with them.”

A few days earlier, Sierra had found out that when she had asked Nik to reschedule her meeting with Curt, he had told Curt instead that Sierra had changed her mind about wanting a television show.  She had learned about this when Curt had called about her party, and at first she was livid.  Nik had sent Sierra a huge bouquet of flowers and a bracelet for her birthday, but she wasn’t ready to talk to him yet. Manda actually felt a bit sorry for him.

“Oh, wow.  Sierra, this is great news,” she said.

“It is, isn’t it?”  Sierra’s grin vanished.

“But…you don’t seem so happy.” Manda told her.

“Well, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately…about what I want.  I can’t just think about myself anymore.  I’ll be someone’s parent.”

“I think you’ll be a great mother,” Manda said.  “Certainly a fun one.”

“I hope so.”  Sierra stroked her belly.  “I haven’t been the most forgiving daughter, and I’ve definitely been a terrible sister lately.” 

“Sierra…it doesn’t matter if we’re technically half-sisters,” Manda said, bringing up the one subject they had been avoiding since the time on the cliff.  “I won’t love you any less.” 

“Thanks, Manda.”  Sierra reached out and held her hand.  “You know, if Mum had just been honest in the first place, she would have saved the family so much heartache.”

“But it’s been more of a tragedy for her than for anyone else.  Why do you think she’s ended up so lonely?”

“Yes, she did bring that on herself,” Sierra said.

“But don’t you think you’ve punished her enough?”

“I know,” Sierra said quietly. 

“She made a mistake, Sierra.  Parents make mistakes.  They make one bad decision, and sometimes that’s all it takes to create a lifetime of trouble.  But she wants to clean up this mess, if you’ll only give her a chance.  How would you feel if your baby grew up and stopped speaking to you?  You would be devastated, no matter what caused it.”

Sierra rested her hands on her belly.  “Children can change your perspective, can’t they?” she said. 

“I believe they can.” 

“Manda, I know you’re right.  I do take my family for granted.  You came all the way here to try and help me.  You were willing to have me call you crazy, face Nik, have a showdown with an Obeah woman down in Jamaica – and all because you feared for us.  You had no proof about anything, but it didn’t matter.  And all I did was keep turning my back on you.  But I think it’s time I stopped running.”  Sierra looked across the roof at the people sitting around the tables, dining on Angie’s food.  “Manda, I’m going home for a bit,” she said.

“Home?  Your party is just beginning.  You can’t go home.”  Although Manda had to admit she was a bit knackered herself.  It had been a long, long week.

“No, Manda.  I mean home.  I’m going back to England to have the baby.  Then I’ll come back to New York afterwards.  I told Curt, and he said it would be fine.”

“You’re what?”  Manda’s mouth dropped open.

“I’ve been thinking about it a lot.  I want my baby to know its family.  And besides, I think it’s time I faced Mum again.  We have a lot to work out.”

“Oh, Sierra.”  Manda wiped away a tear.  She wrapped her arms around her sister’s shoulders.  “I can’t believe I’m hearing this.”

“Now, don’t expect miracles,” Sierra said.  “It’s time we moved forward, but I’m taking it one step at a time.”

“I understand,” Manda said.  The roof door opened and she saw Noah step outside and look around.  Sierra followed her gaze. 

“That’s right, you have two men to choose from, lucky cow,” she said. 

“I don’t think there is a choice,” Manda said.  It was time for her to move forward too. What had Noah said to her that time?  You’re not fate’s bitch.  She straightened up and brushed down her clothes.  She walked across the roof towards Noah.  How on earth had she even thought for a moment that there was a choice?  He turned to her as she approached.  She paused in front of him and took a deep breath. 

“Noah,” she said, looking up at him.  “What’s your middle name?”

“I’m afraid you’ll be going back to England alone,” Manda told Sierra two days later.  “I think I want to stay here for a little while.  If I can.”

“You have to,” Sierra said.  She was still beaming from her party’s success.  “You can’t blow this thing you have with Noah. And don’t forget about Antoinette.”

“I know.” Manda had been in shock that a boutique wanted her clothes.  All her life, she had tried to do the practical thing.  She had always chosen the safest routes through life, the roads she had anticipated would have the least bumps.  And the one time she had wanted to take a risk and try designing clothes for a living, she had let her mother in particular talk her out of it.  She was a good nurse, but maybe she could be a good designer too.  After all, it was something she loved even more than nursing. 

“Well, I’m glad you’re staying,” Sierra said.  “Someone has to water my plants while I’m gone.”

“You don’t have any plants,” Manda reminded her.

And so everything was arranged.  Manda would be extending her stay and taking over Sierra’s flat for a while.  And in a few weeks, Sierra would be going back to England until her baby was born.  She would be living with their mother, keeping her company.  Myrna had cried when Sierra had finally picked up the phone to speak to her.  She was too happy to berate Manda for extending her stay in New York. 

On a cool Saturday morning in October, Noah volunteered to drive Sierra to La Guardia.  Manda sat in the passenger seat beside him, and Sierra stared wistfully out the back window, watching her beloved New York go by.  It would be another year before she would see it again.  Before leaving the flat, she had hung her white hat on the hook by the door as a symbol that she would be back. 

Noah was happy to know that Manda would be staying.  She had confessed to him about Daniel’s phone call, and how she had finally called Daniel back and told him she didn’t want to try again.  Noah said that he had suspected something was up, and he was afraid he was losing her.

“You?  Afraid of something?” Manda said, in mock horror.  She didn’t tell him that he was a big part of the reason she had decided to stay.  She had even put Daniel’s doll in the Goodwill bag, with all the other things they no longer cared to keep.

Noah shrugged and smiled.

They reached the ramp that read Departures.  It had only been a couple months since she had gotten off her flight at this very airport, but to Manda it felt like a lifetime ago.  So much had changed in that time.  She had changed.  She had thrown away Daniel, and thrown away her job in England.  And here she was, about to take a risk in love and in her career.  Two things she would never have imagined before.  She had no idea what would become of her and Noah, or how far her designing would take her.  But she was no longer so afraid of being unprepared, or afraid of the unpredictable future.  Whatever came, she would be able to handle it.   

“Manda, I have something for you,” Sierra said, when they were inside the airport.  She pulled a small blue box out of her pocket.

“What is it?” Manda asked, but Sierra just handed it to her.

Manda pulled the cover off the box and gasped.  It was the angel brooch, the one she had wanted so long ago, when their father had given it to Sierra instead. 

“But Sierra,” she stammered.  “You said you had lost it.”

“I lied,” Sierra said.  She pinned it to Manda’s blouse.  “It’s been sort of a good luck charm for me.  I thought you might demand it back.  It should have been yours after all.”

Manda hugged her.  She had to force herself not to cry.  “I’ll see you soon, okay?  Tell everybody I love them.”

They watched Sierra walk away.  When she reached the glass doors, she turned and blew a kiss to them.  “This is Sistah Britain, saying goodnight and may the night be good to you,” she said.  And with that, she was gone. 

 

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Thank you for reading my novel.  If you enjoyed it, please leave a rating or review at your favorite retailer on my behalf.  Thanks!

Alexis Jacobs