Para Commando
April 2017, Newtown, Kolkata
‘Hi, my sweet boyfriend. What are you doing?’
I blushed when he said, ‘Missing my girlfriend.’ He inquired, ‘Can we meet tomorrow?’
‘What?’ I said amazed, ‘I was going to ask you the same thing,’ I added.
‘Oh then Victoria Garden?’
‘All right then, see you,’ I replied. ‘I love you,’ I added.
‘Love you so much,’ he responded.
I replied, ‘I know, my beloved friend.’
I wished to give my beloved boyfriend a gift. What then should I do? The query was that. I gave it a lot of consideration.
150 In the Arms of a Soldier I looked everywhere. I then remembered Vikrant telling me once how much he adores timepieces. I’m done now! I chose to present him with a timepiece. I looked around, made a decision on an Audemars Piguet Royal Oak Perpetual Calendar watch, and placed my purchase. Even though it was very costly, who cares? I carried my Kohinoor Diamond. The purchase arrived to me after four days. I was overjoyed because it was the first time I had given him a present. I called him on the phone.
It was finally time. I chose to wear a black silk saree that my spouse had given me. I didn’t clip my hair up because I had straightened it. I applied some cosmetics and was prepared to leave. I remembered to bring a present. To be frank, I was in a mood that evening. I wished to embrace him. I wanted to kiss him, strip him off, and then attack him. I had a special desire for his physique over mine. And I can almost guarantee that he shared my desire.
At 6 o’clock I arrived at Victoria Park. It was now dark. The wind was blowing cold, which enhanced my amorous mood.
Vikrant, however, had not yet arrived. He is very careful with his time, so I found this to be quite a surprise. I looked through my handbag for my phone in order to see where he was. Fuck !! I had left it behind at home. I was left with no choice but to wait.
Vikrant had not been seen in 30 minutes. What’s going on?
Why didn’t he come? Is he otherwise engaged? My thoughts raced with questions. But I was at a loss for words. I made the decision to delay some more. Even though it was 8 pm, Vikrant was still nowhere to be found. At the same moment, I was terrified, angry, and upset.
Why did he not turn up? I couldn’t stop asking myself this one question. I was an utter idiot and left my phone at home. As a result, there was no means to reach him. Should I visit the Army’s top brass? The plan didn’t seem to be very effective. So I gave up on it. I decided to return home hurt. I was so upset that I couldn’t stop weeping as I travelled. I arrived at my house. I put my bike in the garage and let myself in. My first action was to examine my
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mobile phone. Vikrant had left 33 missed calls for me. To view his texts, I opened WhatsApp.
"Baby, what’s going on? Why haven’t you been returning my calls? I’m truly sorry, but I have some devastating news to share.
My commanding officer summoned me this afternoon and ordered me to report to Leh immediately. It was an urgent mission, and I had no choice but to comply. According to our intelligence, some Pakistani troops have crossed into our territory and are plotting something significant. They’ve even taken control of some of our bunkers, and this situation is unacceptable.
There are 45 Rashtriya Rifles troops stationed there, but the commanding officer believes that this mission should be entrusted to the Para Special Forces, with me as the mission’s commander.
I see this as an opportunity to prove my abilities and dedication.
I’m truly sorry for not being able to meet you before I left. I know you won’t easily forgive me for this, but please try to understand.
I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, for an Indian soldier, the country always comes first.
I’ve tried calling you multiple times, but you weren’t answering, so I decided to write you this message. Being in a relationship with a soldier comes with its challenges. I might not always be by your side, but I will always hold you in the highest regard. I want to provide you with all the comforts in the world, but you also need to learn how to take care of yourself. It’s crucial because only when you can look after yourself will this soldier be able to protect his motherland, his first love.
I can’t say for certain when I’ll be back, but I promise you I will return. You know something? For the first time, I’m feeling afraid, and it’s because of you, not the mission. Prano, please be cautious and work hard. There might be some network issues preventing me from reaching you. Once again, I’m truly sorry. I have to go now. Prano, goodbye. Stay safe. Take care. Thank you.
I love you deeply.”
After reading this message, I felt completely broken inside. I was alone, without Vikrant and I had no idea when he would turn
152 In the Arms of a Soldier up. I thought I was in a fairy tale, but then reality struck me. He is, in reality, a Para Commando. When you recognise that you have met your soul mate and want to spend the remainder of your life with him. Then, you want to begin living the rest of your life as soon as possible because if that person were to abruptly pass away, your life’s meaning would also. When you reach that low point in life, all you want is to be left alone.
My feet died, and I am now on the earth.
‘Not again…..,’ I shouted.
My eyes were crying, and I was crying. I was in tears. I was simultaneously irate, sad, and terrified. I sobbed before going to sleep. I stood up, sobbed once more, and then went back to sleep.
It continued non-stop for two days. I skipped lunch, dinner, and anything else. I didn’t even leave that spot.
My door ranged, ‘Tring... tring...’ I was so exhausted that I couldn’t move. I did, however, managed to unlock the entrance.
‘Vikrant is he here?’ I let the door open. Vikrant didn’t attend.
Shivam, Sonal, and Pratik instead stood there.
I said, ‘Ohh.. you people.. come in.’
‘Prana, what’s wrong? View yourself.’ Sonal immediately started making inquiries as soon as they entered in the room.
‘What happened to you, Pranali?’ Sonal said.
‘Please be sited,’ I said to her.
Shivam commanded ‘Prana, tell us what happened.’
‘Yes, you missed two days of work. Even worse, you didn’t return our messages. Prana, what’s wrong?’ Pratik said, ‘You can share with us.’ Sonal was seated next to me.
‘Guys, nothing,’ I replied.
Sonal gently touched my forehead with her palms. ‘Prana, look at you. Your pupils have enlarged. It is obvious that you hadn’t slept for several evenings. Is anything regarding Vikrant
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happened? You can share with us.’ After hearing her, I lost control of my emotions. As I hugged her, I started to sob.
‘Ohh.. Shu... It’s All right.’ Sonal urged me not to weep.
‘Pratik, please fetch a cup of water.’
‘Who? Me?’ asked Pratik. He was given a death look by Sonal. He said, ‘Alright,’ and then he brought me a cup of water.
‘Ok, tell me now.’ I told them the entire tale. How Vikrant left me and fled for the border. Before Sonal interrupted the silence between the three of them, there was some brief silence.
‘Listen, Prana; in actuality, you are Vikrant’s lover and he is a Para Commando. As a result, you must face the reality that you will encounter situations of this nature frequently. To safeguard the country, he must depart from you and cross international borders. Tell me one thing: Should he prioritise your well-being over carrying out his missions?’
I retorted, ‘He should focus on his duties.’
‘Right. However, how could he if you don’t look after yourself?’ I was at a loss for words. ‘He’ll be secure. I’m certain.
It’s now up to you to show that you merit the title of Army wife.’
Shivam advised me to move on and embrace reality.
Pratik questioned, ‘And tomorrow you’re coming to work, right?’
‘Yes, I’ll be there.’ I am truly fortunate to have them in my life. I had to face the fact that situations of this nature are typical of living as an army spouse. I must therefore get used to it. I made the decision to stop crying and to start living. The following day, I returned to work.
…
He hadn’t been seen for thirty days. My existence was so flavourless. I had to stay living, so I did. I needed to be in top condition for Vikrant’s comeback. I was looking to attempt something new to pass the time and divert my attention. I then began to watch anime. Actually, I didn’t care much for anime, but
154 In the Arms of a Soldier Vikrant did. I viewed anime films with the title ‘a silent voice’ as a test. It tells the tale of a former bully who became an outcast and chooses to get in touch with and become friends with the deaf girl he once teased.
I watched more anime movies, which subsequently piqued my interest. I wished to sample some anime shows. Naruto.
Vikrant liked it a lot. He was enraged by it. Can you imagine a para commander tried to mimic the anime character all the time?
However, it was real. When I discovered that it includes 720
episodes, my mouth remained open. twenty minutes each. It was a long journey. Yes, the series is very long, but it is well worth viewing. It describes affection, friendship, and aspirations.
I’ll stop talking about anime now; let’s get to my tale. My days consisted of getting up, going to work, coming home, watching cartoons, reading a book, and going to bed. not another.
I was working in my workplace late at night when an email notification appeared. When I checked it by opening it, imagine what? Vikrant sent the text in question. I rushed to open it.
Dear Pranali,
What’s up? I’m aware that you’re both happy and furious.
You ought to be furious with me. Very apologetic. You love me, I’m sure of it. What’s going on in your life? Is everything okay? I ask that you look after yourself.
On the Indian side of the LOC, the Pakistani Army dispatched troops to take a few positions. Four to seven companies of the Northern Light Infantry and members of the elite Special Services Group established bases on 132 strategic locations within the Indian-controlled area. Some reports claim that Afghan mercenaries and Kashmiri guerrillas support these Pakistani troops. The situation is dire, but I have faith that we will prevail.
I miss you a lot Prana. I particularly miss the Biryani you prepared. I just need this mission to be completed so I can enjoy your homemade biryani. I must leave now, so goodbye. Take care.
Yours,
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Vikrant.
I clicked on compose option and started writing.
Dear Vikrant,
I miss you when I wake up. I miss you when I’m at work. I miss you before I go to sleep. Every minute of every day, I think about you and miss you. You are on my mind both when I wake up and when I go to bed. I’m currently deeply engaged. I can no longer imagine living without you.
When I got your note on that particular day. I was simultaneously very upset and furious. I asked, ‘How can you treat me like this?’ How can you go without even saying goodbye to me? In fact, those few days were very difficult for me. I had the impression that my spirit had been exiled from my body. But then, thanks to Sonal, Shivam and Pratik. They brought Pranali back, you know, and they helped me get out of my downbeat frame of mind. To have companions like them is truly a blessing.
I recently picked up a new pastime. anime viewing. Yes, I used to dislike anime, but now I can’t exist without it. And just so you know, Mr. Vikrant, I finished Naruto in 41 days. Aren’t I fantastic? I am extraordinary, yes. I had also read many books.
All right, enough already. We should discuss ourselves. You have my utmost admiration, Vikrant. My current boyfriend, who will one day become my spouse, is guarding his country’s borders.
Pizza is being joyfully consumed by those around me because my boyfriend is serving his motherland while famished.
I’ve discovered how much I love you over the past few days.
What an Army Wife is supposed to be like. Vikrant, when are you coming back. I mean, please finish your assignment and come see me as soon as you can. You give me my breath. Without you, I can not live.
I want to tell you many things. But I don’t believe this is the appropriate moment to tell you about it. You obviously lack biryani. However, I guarantee that I will prepare it and serve you with my own hands when you arrive. Ok. I believe that’s sufficient.
156 In the Arms of a Soldier Serve your country by concentrating on your tasks. I am not going anywhere. Complete your mission and return as soon as possible.
Your jaan is waiting for you :(
Only yours,
Prana
…
Someone rang the doorbell at 11pm in the late hours. I was terrified. who is currently present. I took up the broom and began moving slowly in cat steps towards the entrance. When I opened the door, I was surprised to see Nimrit standing there.
I asked, ‘Nimrit you?,’ simultaneously pleased and surprised.
I pleaded her to enter. She’s here, why? Is everything okay?’ Why didn’t she inform me prior to arriving? I waited till she was at ease.
‘What a treat, Nimrit. How are things going for you?’
She asked, appearing to be nervous, ‘Fine. you?’
I responded, ‘I’m fine, but why are you here and why didn’t you tell me before coming?’
‘Sorry about that. I recently misplaced my phone along with all the contacts on it. Therefore, I was unable to reach you.’
‘All right,’ I responded.
‘How’s your work going,’ I enquired.
I was utterly shocked to hear ‘I resigned.’
‘Yet why? When you were promoted, you appeared to be truly perplexed How are you able to do this, Nimmi?’
‘Yes, you are correct. When I was promoted, I was ecstatic.
However, I was unaware at the time that this new chance would cost me my peace, my happiness, my privacy, and my personal space. I had to share a room with three men when I got to Bengaluru. I asked for a different room, but it was in futile. I never felt at ease around those people. I’ve always felt uneasy around their irises. But I managed to get some home. I considered
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the office to be excellent and highly evolved. However, internal politics and levels of favouritism were very high. My talent was never recognised by them. I was never given credit for my talent.
For them, money was the only thing that mattered. The only thing that went well for me was that I kept in touch with Shivam. He was a huge assistance to me and was sensitive to my emotions.
‘But when credit for a project for which I hadn’t slept for a night was awarded to a man who didn’t even know the project’s specifics, my head began to fill with water.
‘It’s enough, I told myself. I penned a resignation letter and threw it on my manager’s face before leaving Bengaluru.’ I paid close attention.
I said with a nod, ‘You know what, I believe I would have done the same if I was on your property.’ She grinned too. ‘So what’s next?’ I asked.
‘Abhishek, my childhood friend and the science teacher, told me that their school needs a computer teacher,’ she responded.
‘Will you join it,’ I asked.
She remarked, ‘Yes, I am aware that the income will be lower, but I will be at peace.’
I said, grinning, ‘Okay.’
‘And I’m also going to speak to Shivam about our wedding,’
she added.
‘Are you serious?’ I gushed.
‘Hmm,’ was her reply.
‘That’s a really wise choice,’
‘Vikkie Bhaiyya is indeed on a quest. When he returns, I will tell him too’
He’ll be overjoyed, I predicted. For a while, neither of us said anything. She continued to hold my palm. ‘Do you miss him?’
I lied and smiled, ‘No.’
She raised her right eyebrow as if to question me, ‘Really?’
158 In the Arms of a Soldier
‘I do miss him. I really do mourn him. When someone phones, the first thing I think is, ‘Is Vikrant calling?’ When the doorbell sounds, I wonder if Vikrant is home. But each time, my anticipation is dashed. I mourn him when I see Pratik and Sonal fighting. I ponder when the time will come when he and I also get into these ridiculous arguments. You know, the first few days after he left were really awful for me. I went two days without eating or drinking, but Sonal, Pratik, and Shivam helped me pull myself out of my melancholy,’ I said, wiping a few tears from the corner of my eyes.
‘Don’t worry,’ Nimrit assured me, ‘He would be back shortly.’
‘I’m aware of it.’ We continued to converse before going to bed. I looked to see if Vikrant had sent me any emails. I avert my teary eyes after having my expectations dashed once more.
We had a small gathering the following day after Sonal, Pratik, Sid and Shivam arrived to meet Nimrit. Nimrit couldn’t wait to meet Sid. Shivam felt uneasy because they had a strong connection there. When Nimrit noticed it, she called Shivam on the terrace where they had fun and cut off her conversation with Sid. She informed me that Shivam approved of their marriage after they spoke about it. Like me, they now simply anticipated Vikrant’s return.
After a few more days, Nimrit had to move out of my house because it was time for her to go. I left her at the airport. She abandoned me once more after joining us along with Sonal Pratik and Shivam. Again, I was by myself. I had once more fallen.
Nimrit spent three days with me. Those were lovely times. Those three days resembled an island of tranquilly surrounded by a sea of sorrow. I was once more lost in the ocean of sorrow and solitude. I had a suffocating sensation. I unlocked the door because I needed to leave. Sid, however, was present to my astonishment.
I said, keeping my palm on my heart, ‘Ohh Sid, you scared me.’
‘Am I looking terrible?’ I chuckled. ‘No, no, I didn’t mean to say that.’
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‘May I come in?’
‘Ohh.. sorry.. please come in.’
‘I just happened to be passing by so I thought we should meet.’
‘Thank you for coming.’ I said in a hushed voice, ‘I really needed someone.’
‘Are you all right?’
‘Yes I am’.
‘Really?’
‘Should I tell him about Vikrant?’
‘Yes, nothing,’ I replied.
‘Okay,’ he grinned. When he departed, we had a satisfying conversation. Again, I was by myself. There seems to be a gap, in my opinion. It is what? Vikrant. Yes. Why did I join this company?
Why did I meet Nimrit? Why did I meet Vikrant? Why did I give him my cell phone number? Why did I adore him and still do? I experienced suffocation once more.
