Chapter 21
I turn a couple of corners and I find a small park. A fine rain is dribbling on Amsterdam, and there’s nobody around but an old lady walking an old dog. I like the couple, their slow pace appeases me and I wish I could follow the lady where she lives. My head is pounding, I would do anything to muffle the noise resounding within it. I picture her cozy house, the quiet of which I so desperately long for. The lady must sense my presence, and perhaps my sympathy, because she turns my way and smiles. I smile back, and try to find my courage in this exchange of solidarity as I pull out the note from my pocket with shivering fingers. And as I do so something else falls from my pocket. I bend to pick it up, it’s a one way train ticket for a place called Sittard.
When I stand up again the lady is already walking away, head slightly bowed and back a bit hunched. Alone again, I start reading.
Take the 4 p.m. train for Sittard. You’ll reach Sittard at 6.10. I will be in front of the obelisk in the square you’ll find when exiting the underpass.
From there I will drive you somewhere safe. With your microchip removed it will take them longer to find you. I will help you find your sister, but you cannot stay in Amsterdam now.
Do not go back to your hostel. You must avoid meeting Melissa, she is one of them.
So what was on my shoulder was a microchip. This is sci-fi, what’s happening is nightmarish and intriguing at once in its total absurdity. If my mystery man knows about the microchip somebody must have been monitoring me all along. Have they influenced my choices and my thoughts? I don’t even know who I am anymore, or if anything at all is real.
The thought makes me laugh. It’s a mirthless laugher, but nonetheless I feel better.
I reread the note.
Should I go to Sittard? Why Sittard by the way?
I’ll go.
After all does it even make a difference if I make one decision or the other? If I stay here they’ll find me anyways, whoever “they” are.
I cannot figure out how to reach the station without going back to the hospital and connecting to the wi-fi there but I want to avoid the lady at front desk at all costs.
I start walking out of the park without the faintest sense of direction. I’m not worried, I’ll find someone at some point and I will ask how to reach the station.
I have plenty of time and even if I lost the train it would be fine. I can stay here in Amsterdam and decide what to do next or stay still and wait for the next event to find me.
My calm has no rational foundation, but I have faith. No matter what will happen next, I will be just fine.