In the last year, Neil has watched a tremendous number of movies. An almost staggering number. An average of two movies a night, seven days a week for a year. Big-budget, independent, comedies, horror, action. If it came out between 2000 and 2021, he’s probably seen it. Twice. He invested in a TV large enough for him to stretch out his arms and still not be able to touch both sides (so you can either imagine a very large TV or a very small Neil). In the past year, he has literally eaten his own body weight in popcorn (so it follows that your recent decision on the size of Neil greatly impacts the amount of popcorn consumed).
So many of the movies make him think of her. There always seems to be some subtle or not-so-subtle reference to one of their break-ups. The thing about on-again/off-again relationships is that there are a lot of off-agains to sort through.
The one where he was at fault.
The one where she was at fault.
The one where they were both at fault.
The ones where nobody was to blame.
Some movies make him think that perhaps the last off-again was a terrible mistake.
Some movies remind him of why it terribly wasn’t.
Sometimes, he feels manipulated and sometimes, he realizes that everything is within his control. Everything is between his own ears.
It’s like the movie where the protagonist (I originally typed “hero” but that’s an awfully big load for a character to carry these days) is standing on his deck late at night looking up at the sky. He sees a plane passing overhead and tries to imagine all of the lives going on within. Even if he was familiar with the make and model of the plane, the layout and number of passengers, there would be no way of really knowing what was going on within.
The way he feels when he thinks about his former love interest. The twinkling of the plane. The beauty of the night sky in the background.
Not knowing what was going on between the entrance and where they bring in the baggage.
So twice a night, he puts the metal fitting into the buckle, takes a few moments to locate his nearest exit, familiarizes himself with the flight safety instructions, and gets ready to revisit somewhere new.
Neil is really looking forward to the day when he can leave his house again.