I got a letter from Jill Ann today. It's only been five days since last saw her as she got on a bus bound for San Berdoo. All the letter had in it was a full length picture of her clothed with a star drawn on her pussy and a note that said "Remember your promise. See you soon. Love, Jill Ann"
I dropped those extra mariwanee pounds off, got my money back and still had three pounds to party with. And since I can take a hint, I stick out my thumb the very next morning headed for Riverside. I hitch all day and night and by 4 a.m. am on the Interstate 10 east standing on the freeway just outside of LA. It's real late so I figure no cop will bother me. Wrong! A CHP pulls over.
The cop gets out of his car and asks if I know it's illegal to hitch hike on the freeways in California.
I tell him yeah, but it's so late who cares.
Well, he does for one. And what's that he smells?
Do I have any marijuana on me?
I truthfully answer no (it's all in my backpack).
He says that he smells something funny. Do I have any patchouli oil or incense on me?
Why yes sir, I sure do. Then I take a package of patchouli incense out of the side pocket of my pack.
He looks at it, sniffs it, nods his head then says how glad he is that didn't have to search me, tear my pack apart and take me to jail.
And think, 'not as glad as I am'.
He hands me back the incense and asks if I have any weapons. Just a Buck Knife.
He tells me to give it to him then to get in the front seat of the cruiser and he'll take me to the edge of his beat, which is only a few miles from San Bernadino.
He gives me back the buck knife, drops me at an all night gas station and tells the attendant to let me stay there until dawn.
The attendant says okay. Then he goes back to watching the all night movie channel.
As soon as the cop is gone so am I. I go back to the freeway, crawl in some bushes and sleep for a few hours. Have to be well rested for Jill Ann.
I get up around 10 a.m. and take a bus to Riverside and am knocking on Jill Ann's door by 11 a.m. She answers the door. She sees me and jumps right into me arms saying she knew I’d come and how happy she is to see me. Come on in and she'll fix me something to eat. She takes my hand and leads me into the house, a typical suburban home, telling me that since it's Saturday her mom and little sister are home so I mise as well meet them now. Mom and little sister? She never said that she still lived at home but then I didn't ask, oh well.
We go into the kitchen and Mom wants to know who I am.
Jill Ann tells her that I am good friend from San Francisco and that I've come to spend the night with her.
Mom, a good looking woman in her early 40's. She eyes me like a porterhouse steak in a butcher shop, smiles then says, “Pleased to meet you. Call me Joan. Would you like something to eat?"
First the daughter then the mother want to feed me, this could be interesting.
After lunch Jill Ann tells me to wait in the living room while she gets ready for the day. She has plans for us, and I can hardly wait.
As I'm sitting on the couch, a younger version of Jill Ann walks in and says, "Hi, you must be Tai. I'm Jill Ann's sister, Jennifer but you can call me Jenny." then sits down right next to me and says, "Jill Ann says you're spending the night. I bet she didn't tell you that this is just a two bedroom house and that me and her share a bedroom. Come on, I'll show you."
She takes my hand and leads me to the bedroom door. I look in and there are 2 twin beds in a very girlie looking room. Jenny says, "If you sleep with Jill Ann tonight, I hope you two don't make too much noise and keep me awake all night. I just hate that." then she giggles.
My Oh My, what have you gotten yourself into this time Tai? It looks like trouble for sure. A hot mom, a horny babe and a pervo sister. It's going to be heaven or hell, or both if I'm lucky!
Just then Jill Ann comes out of the bathroom, see her sister holding my hand and grabs it away from her with a dark look then tells me let's go. She tells Mom that she is taking the car for the day.
Mom says to be back by 4 p.m. and out the door we go.
Jill Ann says that the plan is to go over to her boyfriend Dave's house where we’ll sit and make out in the car to make him jealous. I tell her that this does not sound like a good idea to me. She answers that even though she loves him, Dave is a wimp and all he'll do is sit in his house and watch, and maybe if she's lucky, he'll give her hell the next time they're alone.
I ask her if isn't there something better that she'd like to do with me.
She tells me that there's plenty of time for that later and to quit whining because we're almost there.
We pull in front of a small house and park then sit there doing nothing for a while so I ask her what's up. She says, "Dave's not home, so we'll just have to wait awhile." but after only a couple minutes she drives away, circling the block a few times cursing Dave for being so thoughtless as not to be there.
I am beginning to think that maybe Jill Ann is not all there either.
As we drive one minute she's happy and gay, telling me how happy she is that I am with her, then the next she's scowling and squinting, saying that it's all my fault, that if I wasn't there then she could be with Dave. She's schizing out right in front of me and as far as I can tell, she is not on drugs.
It doesn't bother me though, I've dealt with lots of schizo's in my time, and in fact, I have myself been diagnosed as an epileptic schizophrenic by more than one shrink both as an out patient and in the loony bin so I understand where she is coming from. I prefer the company of schizo's over maniac’s and much more over neurotic’s. They’re a lot more fun and always interesting. The day just keeps getting curiosier and curiosier.
Jill Ann is tired of circling the block and suggests that we go over to one of her girlfriend’s house and visit her for awhile then come back and try Dave again later. I tell her that whatever she wants to do is okay with me. She gives me a big smile, squeezes my knee and again tells me how happy she is to be with me.
We go over to the girlfriend’s house, who is home. Jill Ann introduces me to Sherry, a girl who is a total mess. She looks a mess, her house is a mess and her mental state is the messiest of all. She’s glad to see Jill Ann and ignores me while they chat together. It seems they met in a nut house and since they were both in for a protracted stay became friends. Sherry's a neurotic so she sings the same old tired song over and over again of just how fucked up her life is and how she would like to get it together but she just can't because her life is so fucked up and so on and so on, etc.
I tune her out because as she's whining about her fucked up life, Jill Ann has a small notebook out writing furiously then passing me notes that say, "Fuck, I want to!" "Fuck, it feel so good!" “Fuck, let’s do it!" and so on. As I said, schizo's are a lot more fun. After a half hour of Sherry's crying even Jill Ann can't stand it any more and tells Sherry that she has to go see if Dave's home yet. Of course, Dave's not home so it's back to her house.
When we come in and as we walk past mom's room, Mom says, "Tai, why don't you come in, and sit and talk with me." while she pats the bed.
I look in and see that she's only wearing her bra and panties. Jill Ann holding my hand jerks me away saying, "Just ignore her. She doesn't have a date tonight so she’s depressed. I just hope she don't start drinking."
I think, 'me too'.
Jill Ann looks into my eyes and says she has to get fixed up for me. Then we'll go for a short walk and she'll show me something special under her favorite tree where we'll be hidden and it'll be cool and shady. I'm thinking, 'I can hardly wait.'
As soon as she shuts the bathroom door, the sister is sitting right next to me saying, "I heard Jill Ann say that she's going to show you her special spot, maybe I'll ask if I can come along and watch."
I tell her that it'd probably be a good idea if she stayed here but she just giggles and says, "We'll see." then goes back into her bedroom.
This is one nutty family. Earlier when I had asked Jill Ann about her father, she snapped at me, "That is none of your business! He's gone and that is all that matters."
I say, "Sorry."
She relaxed saying, "Never mind."
Jill Ann is out of the bathroom, she's not only changed her clothes but her hair style and she is wearing quite a lot of make up. She looks like she's going on a date and it's only 4 p.m. She walks up to me, takes my hand, looks into my eyes and says sweetly, "Come on, let's go." and leads me out the back door.
We go through a hole in the fence, through a field of wild grass and into a grove of eucalyptus trees. She sits down on the leaves and tells me to sit next to her. I ask if she has a blanket or something to lay on but she says that we don't need a anything, the leaves are soft enough. I ask her if she'd like to smoke a joint since sex is always better when you're high. She says that sounds like a good idea so I fire one up. But before we even finish the doobie, Jill Ann starts talking, and not to me, but to some one behind me.
I look knowing there's no one there and there isn't, not anyone I can see anyway.
Jill Ann says, "Yes, I’m going to be with him.” (pause) “Because I like him, that's why” (pause) “ Oh I see, he knows, he's been there."
I stare right into Jill Ann's eyes and think, 'That's right Jill Ann, I've been there lots of times. Right up on the razors edge between infinity and eternity, and I’ve look into that deep blackness and thought, 'How easy it would be just to let go and freefall into Nothing. Yeah Jill Ann, I've been there.'
Jill Ann looks at me, takes my hand saying, "We could go there together right now."
I say, "Jill Ann, before I do anything else with you, you have to introduce me to your friend and tell me his name."
Jill Ann darkens saying, "That is not possible. He doesn't want anybody to know his name but me."
I let go of Jill Ann's hand and say, "Then I have to go because if I can't know your friend then I can't know you." and get up.
Jill Ann says, "Wait a second.” (pause) “My friend says that if we get married then I can tell you his name, and he will even show himself to you."
I ask, "What do you mean, get married?"
She looks at me saying, "You know, married, forever."
I look at Jill Ann saying sadly, "I can't marry you forever Jill Ann. I am already committed to this path for my life."
She looks back at me and says, "Then I can't tell you his name."
I bend down and softly kiss Jill Ann on the cheek then I say, "Good bye Jill Ann, I will always remember you." But she no longer sees me, she's talking to her deamon.
I go back across the field, through the hole in the fence and into the house. Mom, who’s still in just her bra and panties, sees me come in and asks where Jill Ann is.
I tell her that Jill Ann is sitting under her favorite tree talking to her friend and that I am just there to pick up my pack and leave.
Mom says, "Oh that Jill Ann is crazy, but you don't have to go, you can still spend the night here." and smiles her special smile at me.
The sister comes up and asks what's going on. Mom tells her.
Jenny says, "Yeah, don't let Jill Ann's craziness spoil all your fun, she's just moody. She'll be all right in a little while. You should stay."
I look at these two and know that this is one of those situations where I have to be out of town by sundown or I ain't making it out alive, or sane anyway. I thank them politely then tell them that it was nice to meet them but I really do have to go. The look on their faces is one of pure disappointment. I tell them good bye and out the door I go. I walk to the nearest big street, stick out my thumb and the first car that comes by stops and gives me a ride.
It's a car load of young Christian dudes on their way to Big Bear for a weekend Christian retreat and would I like to join them.
Well, why not, it couldn't be any weirder that the last 5 hours. Good bye Jill Ann, and Good Luck to you and to your Mom and to your Sis. I will always wonder what would have happened had I stayed the night.