I had been working the fruit sheds for the last couple of years and in one of them had been on the loading dock with a bunch of other young dudes. It's hard work, the boxes of fruit come down the conveyor belt and we have to sort them according to size then stack them on pallets about 5 feet high. They come out at a pretty good rate too so you are always moving but the time does go by fast, and it's a much better job than being inside with all the noise. Being agricultural workers we have different rules too: 10 hour days, 6 days a week before overtime kicks in and we’re only paid a little more than minimum wage. But hey, it's better than working in the fields where you're only paid for what you pick, and unless you're real good then it's just a big waste of time. Plus, at end of season we get laid off and that means unemployment for 6 months.
While we're working there, the sheds usually have a place for us all to camp that includes toilets and showers so its not too bad. Every night most of us get together, drink, smoke, play music, do some light weight dope and just bullshit until it's time to turn in. Anyway, there's four other young dudes from the loading dock who told me that this spring they had gone to Jamaica for a two week excursion. Since I have always wanted to go there, it is one of the main fabled ganja areas in the world, I asked them how they liked it and what it was like. Here’s the story they told me.
Jason starts, "We went down there in May before it got too hot to check out the weed and the black pussy since none of us had ever had any of that poontang before and we'd heard it was cheap there. We all fly there and land in Kingston which did have lots of pot and whores but was way too much of a hassle and the hotels were expensive, so we asked around and were told to go to Cockpit Country up in the mountains. The black dudes told us that was the place to go for the best ganj and the cheapest snatch. We took a really old bus up the mountain then when we got there told a taxi driver to take us to the best whore house around there.'
"He smiled telling us, "No problem, Man.” and drove us up to this big shack out in the middle of nowhere. He drops us off and at first we just stand around waiting to see what's happening and nothing is, so Robert goes up and bangs on the door."
Robert smiles and says, "Yeah, I knocked and after awhile a big fat black woman comes out and asks us what us white boys want? We tell her, "The best grass and the hottest pussy that you got."
"She laughs at us then looks us over. She tells us that it is way too early for pussy. That her girls ain't even awake yet cuz it's only early after noon and she don't even open until sundown but she'll see what she can do for us in a few hours when the girls do start getting up. Then she says, "You boys do got money, don't ya?”
"We say, "Yes Mam, we got plenty.”
"She smiles and says she'll see what she can do about getting us some ganja in the meantime."
Jason breaks back in, "So she calls her boy and tells him what we want. Well I think that's what she said, because we could barely understand her. She tells us to sit on the couch that's on her front porch and gives us some rum and cokes but with no ice, then goes back inside of the house."
Now it's Jerry's turn at the story, he laughs saying, "An hour later this Rasta looking dude shows up and asks us if we want to smoke split. We do. He tells us the price and we give him the cash. He rolls up a couple of giant hooters then lights one up. We smoke just one and within a few minutes are totally wasted dude. I mean we are zonked. Then the Rasta dude lights up the other one and after that we are petrified. The Rasta dude then asks us if we want to smoke another one but we are all too stoned to even talk."
Robert takes over again, "I ain't never been that high in my whole fucking life. I mean, I couldn’t talk, couldn't move and couldn’t hardly see. Man, I was Chinese eyed. I was so high it was a little scary. I mean, they could of done anything they wanted to us and there wasn't a thing I could've to stop them."
Jason says, "Me either. Man, we were stoned. Anyway, the Rasta dude calls out the madam, tells her something and they both star laughing at us for being so stoned. Then she calls out a couple of the girls. They ask us if we're ready for some red hot black pussy, but all we can do is stare at them like idiots. So they start teasing and jiving us about not being able to get it up, or even get up off of the sofa.
Robert says, "Man, we must have sat there for hours before any of us could move or talk. That was the best dope I’d ever smoked. The madam then came out and gave us some more rum and coke with a big plate of fried chicken, beans and rice. After that we started feeling pretty good and told the madam to get those girls ready cuz we were going to fuck the hell out of them."
"She just laughed saying, "Come on in boys and we'll see what you white boys can do cuz my girls are waitin’ on ya."
"Man, we spent the whole night there raising hell and having fun. Man, and let me tell you, them black girl were hot and wild!"
Jason says, "And the whole thing cost us only a little over $100 for everything. Man, what a night."
Robert continues, "After that we hung out on the beach for the rest of the trip until it was time to fly back, then we went up there for one last party and spent all the rest of our money. It was the best time I've ever had."
Don who hadn't yet spoken, smiles and finishes up the story, "But after that first night we only smoke joints cuz them spliff’s were killers, dude."