Little Anthony, call me Tony, showed up out here in the desert at the hot springs last fall. How he got there no one remembers, how he heard about the springs, he never said. He was on the run from something he'd done in his home city of New York and needed a place to hide out for awhile. The springs fit the bill. We called him 'little' because he was 5'5" in his shoes and weighted maybe 120 pounds but he packed more energy and personality into his frame than most men twice his size. He was always congenial and ready to help anyone with anything, legal or not, as long as it didn't involve any manual labor that is. Even though he didn't have much money and showed up for dinner a lot, everyone liked him and was glad to have him around. It wasn't that he was broke, he got food stamps like everybody else and he had an AT&T. phone card belonging to AT&T. that for $5 he'd let you call anyone anywhere and talk as long as you liked, but his main source of income was speed chess. He told us he made a good living at it in New York and I believe him. I must of seen him play hundreds of matches in the six months he was at the springs, all for money, and I never saw him or even heard of him losing a single game. I saw him play three guys at once for $20 a piece and beat them all. Some folks came out every week to see if they could beat him, as far as I know no one ever did.
Being young, he said that he was 25, personable and cute, according to all the girls anyway, plus being Italian, never made him want for female company and he wasn't too picky either. As long as it was just for a night or two, he was ready.
Once a 13 year old cutie came out to the springs with her parents who were regulars. She took one look at Tony and instantly fell in Love. She followed him around all morning, even taking off her top in front of him so she could show him her brand new sweet little tittles, but Tony was busy with other things that day. When the girl finally got up the nerve to talk to Tony, he had made a town run and wouldn't be back for several hours. When she found this out she went right up to her parents and told them that she wanted Tony to be her first and that she wasn't leaving until he came back.
Her parents told her, "Okay we'll wait, but we don't want you screwing a round in the bushes, so if Tony wants to have sex with you then he can go home with us and spent the night with you in your room."
For the next two hours every time a car pulled in the girl would ask, "Is Tony in that one?"
Finally Tony shows up and as soon as he's out of the car, the girl is in his arms telling him that he is spending the night with her. Sounds good to him and off they go in the parent’s car. Even before they're out of the parking area we can see that the girl has thrown a vicious lip lock on Tony.
Three days later the parent’s drop Tony back at the springs and is he fagged out. He said that she almost killed him. She wouldn't hardly let him out of the bed for three days except to eat, use the bathroom and shower, and even then she'd join him, lathering him and herself all up.
We all just said, "Oh you poor thing, how you suffered."
The other thing about Tony was that he didn't take no shit from anyone. If he got pissed at somebody then they had better watch out because if he got violent then someone was going to get hurt bad. You could see it in his eyes, so if he got mad at someone for something they did, they would always apologize and make it right. After six months with us at the springs, he got tired of the desert and tired of being poor all the time. His friend Dave, a guy who lived in LA and worked the high steel and who was totally insane told Tony that he could stay with him awhile until he made his fortune. We were all sorry to see him go. He was always a lot of fun and could drink, smoke and party with the best of us. He promised to keep in touch and was gone.
Two months later just as we were all packing it in for the summer (it gets 120 degrees in the shade from June till Sept.) Paul, who had to go to LA every two weeks to collect his unemployment then buy pot with the money said, "Guess who I ran into?”
“Who?” we asked.
“Little Tony, and you would not believe it's the same guy. Now he's driving a brand new BMW and had more gold chains hanging around his neck that Mr. T. He says he's robbing rich peoples houses and making a good living at it."
He also gave Paul his address and phone number and told him to pass them around so that if any of us came through LA we could give him a call.
A month later I was passing through LA and gave Tony a jingle. He answered saying, "Good to hear from you, let's party. Where are you at?”
I told him the Greyhound station.
He said he'd be down with Dave to pick me up shortly.
I'm standing on the corner when a white Karman Ghia come to a stop. Tony hangs his head out of the window and says, "How ya doing man, get in."
Dave's with him.
I ask him where's the Beemer?
Tony tells me, "Oh I wrecked it, but don't worry, it was leased. I’m just driving this until I can get another one."
Dave tells me that this is his car but since Tony likes to drive and he don't, well... I notice we are running all of the stop signs and taking only back streets.
When I ask about it, Dave tells me, "The brakes are out so we can only use the hand brake and Tony doesn't like to use it at all if possible."
So Tony just gears down to slow down, looks to see if it's safe then punches the Ghia through the intersections.
We get to Tony's apartment, a place in Silverlake. It's nice but real small. I can see I'll be sleeping on the sofa, or if Dave sleeps over, on the floor. They tell me I'm in luck, it's Friday and Dave just got paid. Tony's recently been to his fence and we are going to party. I ask Tony how's business? He say not too bad. He's get half a dozen 12 year old boys working for him. He finds houses with no one home, takes two or three of the kids over late at night, shows them how to get in then waits in the car until they come back out with the loot. He tells them to only take cash, jewelry and his favorite, gold, then goes to the fence, cashes in and gives the kids 25% of the take. He said he only robs rich folks houses because the poor ain't got nothing worth stealing but enough of that, let’s get ready for tonight.
First we go to his dealers and get a ounce of pot and a little speed, wouldn't want to crash too early. Then it's to his favorite cafe for a big supper so we don't get hungry later on. Lastly, it's to the liquor store where Tony and Dave each buy two half pints of 151 rum and I get two of tequila because we hate those expensive watered down bar drinks. Back at Tony's we smoke some pot, take some speed and have just enough booze to wash it all down with. Then we kick back and wait until 9 p.m. smoking a bit more just for fun.
We're feeling mellow and it's time to go. We hop into the Ghia and buzz over to a topless a-go-go, have a few drinks which we supplement liberally with our own stash and watch the babes bare bouncing boobies artfully interpret such songs as "YMCA" and "Stayin’ Alive." All the while guys are stuffing dollar bills down the girls G-strings.
Next it's to an old fashion strip show where the honeys take it all off except for their shoes and stockings accompanied by a lot of men hooting and hollering. After that it's a quick stop at a liquor store to replenish our depleted supplies then an even quicker stop at a peep show where the girls don't even pretend to wear anything. It’s drop in a quarter and check out the spread open beaver. On the way out you’re offered a quickie "massage" for $50.
It's midnight now and Tony has promised us a special treat, Nude Female Mud Wrestling. We enter the place after paying $10 each for our first two drinks which are mostly ice and water. We fix that in a hurry and proceed to the pit, a 10'X10' arena filled with about a foot of what looks like yellowish brown clay. In it are two young shapely babes in bikinis, covered with the mud who are trying to pull the bikini top off of their opponent. Whoever does is the winner. She then parades around the place with her trophy, collecting dollars and kisses from the cheering throngs. There's a big sign saying "No Wagering." But of course, no one pays any attention to it. After a couple of the matches we become bored, once you've seen one naked chick covered in mud, you’ve seen them all so we decide to go to a surfer bar in Long Beach for some serious drinking and partying.
On the way we check our supplies and see that they are getting dangerously low so it's time for one more liquor store stop. And look there's one only two blocks away up ahead but before we get to it the light turns red and since we're doing 50 mph in a 30 and have no brakes anyway, Tony punches it and we cruz right on through. Of course, a cop is sitting on that corner and wants to know what's happening. He gets behind us and turns on his siren and bubblegum.
"Shit! It's the cops! Quick get rid of the booze!"
"Where?"
“ I don't care! Pour it on the floor and stick the bottles under the seat." which makes perfect sense to us.
The cops however see all this furtive movement and know that something is up.
When Tony gets the Ghia stopped the cops come out of their cruiser with guns drawn, telling us to put our hands out the window where they can see them, then for us to get out of the car, one at a time and real slow. The cops, two young guys, then search us and cuff us to a parking meter so they can search the vehicle to see what we were stashing. Booze, they laugh, it's only booze. They are so relieved that they uncuff us and tell us if one of us is sober enough to drive and has a license, they will let us go if we promise to drive safely and straight back home. They give us the drunk test and I pass which is good since I am the only one with a driver’s license so I'm elected. The cops get back into their car and leave. Tony tells me to pull into the liquor store parking lot since now we are totally out of liquid refreshment. We replenish and with Tony back at the wheel, head for the surfer bar.
When we get there the place is packed and jumping. They have a live band and everyone is partying. The crowd is pretty rowdy and the bouncers are working hard. After awhile Tony runs out of booze. He waits until someone goes to dance then drinks their drink for them so it won't get stale. One of the bouncers sees this and tells Tony that he is out of there. It's almost closing so we’re ready to go anyway, but the bouncer tells Tony that he’s not moving fast enough and starts pushing him. Dave tells the bouncer he shouldn’t be doing that because he’ll make Tony mad. The bouncer, whose 6'4", 250 pounds looks at wimpy looking little Tony and shoves him hard out the door hard. Tony falls down onto the sidewalk. Tony looks up at the bouncer, smiles, then comes up off the sidewalk with a Heinekens bottle in his hand which smashes it across the bridge of the dudes nose, breaking his nose and stunning him. Tony then bends down and rips a section of chrome strip off a car, straightens up and starts whipping the bouncer's bloody face, neck and chest with it. It's so violent and so fast that no one can believe it's happening. The other bouncer finally comes to his buddies rescue and Tony then goes after him with the chrome strip until his face is bleeding and his shirt is in shreds. No one else there is even trying to get between Tony and the bouncers. We hear sirens in the distance so Tony drops the chrome and hauls ass.
The cops come screeching to a halt, jump out of their car and yell at Tony, "Stop or I'll shoot!"
Tony, about a half block away, looks back to see where the cops are and when he does he runs head first right into light pole, hits the ground and is out cold. The cops run up to Tony, handcuff him, throw him into the back of a cruiser and take him away.
"Shit! Fuck!" Dave is yelling, "Tony's got the car keys!"
Dave wants to know if I can hotwire the Ghia.
Well, I can, but I need a piece of wire to do it. We look, no wire, so we pool our cash and call a cab, we'll worry about Tony in the morning. We get to Tony's apartment and well, Tony’s got the keys to it too so Dave just kicks in the door. We prop the door closed, smoke a joint then go to sleep.
Next day I go back to the Dog to continue my journey leaving Dave to deal with Tony's problems. A few days later I call Tony's number to see what's the haps. Tony answers and tells me that all the charges have been dropped. He says when the DA saw him standing next to the bouncer’s who wanted to press charges, the DA told them there was no way a jury would believe that this little shrimpy looking guy beat up your big biker looking asses up. The Ghia however is history, no license, no registration, no insurance i.e. no car. I said good bye, good luck and see ya in the funnies to Tony and never saw him again.
A few months later Dave came out to the springs to tell us that Tony had been caught burglarizing a house. When the cops ran his prints, they found out that Tony was an escaped convict from a New York state prison so they sent him back to New York where they promptly put his ass in Attica for five long years. I’m sure Tony's doing well though, he always was a very personable guy that everyone liked.