"Tai wake up!"
"What?"
"There's a cop in a car and he’s right outside our door"
"So what?"
"Well, he's been there for the last 20 minutes and he's writing in a book and talking on his radio. We think they're going to bust us."
This gets my attention so I wake up, look at Pat asking her, "How many?"
"Just one" she says.
I get up, put on my Levi’s and T-shirt then go to the front window. Everyone in our commune is there peeping through the curtains. I peep too. Sure enough, there is a cop and he is writing in a book with one hand while talking into a mike in his other.
I look at the others, they shrug, "What should we do?" they ask.
I answer, " I think it's time to meet the Devil."
I grab my clipboard and it’s out the door and down the stairs I go. I walk up to the cop’s window and knock on the glass.
He looks up, winds down his window, then asks, "What do you want?"
I tell him I have a petition to get Prop. 19 on the ballot and would he like to sign it?
He takes the clipboard and reads the proposition over. "This is the marijuana initiative.” he says looking up at me, "And why would I sign that?"
I tell him, don't he have better things to do than harassing kids who smoke harmless flowers? That there' are real criminals out there for him to be catching, real cop work.
The cop just laughs then says, "Yeah, like what I'm doing now."
"Just what are you doing here?" I ask.
He looks at me saying, "I'm keeping the streets safe for you. I'm setting on my ass filling out forms. You see that gold Chevy in front of me?"
I see it
"Well, it's been there for a week and hasn't been moved so I get to sit here waiting for an hour for a tow to show. Yeah, real police work all right."
I sympathize. I can't believe they're wasting this guy’s time on something so petty.
He tells me that ain't the half of it and gives me more examples of real police work, like taking in drunks and nuts who are out of control, or breaking up fights between married folks, or looking for lost pets. “Yeah,” he sneers, “real police work.” then laughs.
I tell him that all he is a high paid garbage man in a good suit.
He laughs again saying, "That's right. Only I deal in human garbage."
We talk like this for a few more minutes then I say, "Well, what about the petition?"
He hands me back the clipboard saying, "Can't sign it. I don't live in the City, but bring it around the station later and I'll ask the other guys about it."
Just then the tow truck shows up and he says, "Nice talking to you, but I got to do some real police work now." then laughs again
I go back into the house and give everyone the skinny. Every body is highly relieved and to celebrate we fire up a joint or three.
I did go to the station later, but the desk sergeant took one look at me and said, "Get your skinny longed haired dope smoking ass out of here or I'll throw ya in the can." Well, I can take a hint.