Dawn to Dusk
“Aunty come and see me dive” Chris shouted from the dive board.
I put aside the novel I am reading, and went to watch him dive. Indeed, he was an excellent diver. At his age I never went near
to water. Maria and Sam were looking at him proudly. There was a wide smile on Maria’s lips and Mom & Dad were also
grinning too from their lounge chairs at pool side. The weather is just right for a spa day and we were all enjoying the day so
much.
I went back to my chair little later and put my newly massaged feet up. The massage was divine. Good that I listened to Maria
and came here for an outing. She pestered me like a bug from last one month and my normally strict mom also couldn’t say
no to her and here we are at Leonia Resort for the weekend.
I recently realised that my mom and dad didn’t have a life of their own at all. Their lives are woven around my life. All they want
in life is my happiness. After I became conscious of this fact, I decided that they need an outing like this to sooth their nerves.
They were in lot of tension over these 6 months.
It’s been so long that I saw smiles on their faces. Maria came to me and gave me a look which says “I told you so”. I have
nothing to retort her. Of course she is right but that doesn’t mean that I should marry and produce children right away. I still
have time. I just need to relax and explore my life before getting back to responsibilities.
I played chess with Chris in that Harry Potter like giant chess board, where chess pieces are almost of my size and the board
is bigger than my bedroom. Chris is a bright child, very clever and lively for a third standard school boy. He is constantly into
something or other and Maria is always behind. She is a very good mom, always takes care of him and gives priority to his
needs than hers. I don’t believe that I can ever be like her, if I ever have a kid. The benchmark she set is very high. Instead of
complementing her for her good qualities, I keep teasing her saying it was all possible because of her husband’s co-operation.
She doesn’t mind though. She is preoccupied with putting some sense into mind brain now.
Like I said, it’s been six months after that ill fated day. I just gave the letter to police and they didn’t bother me much questions.
They were relieved that I came back at all. My mom harassed them like hell till I come back so they were actually thankful to
those terrorists, for releasing me. I followed Abhi’s advice and told them that I was blindfolded. As a result they expressed their
heartfelt sympathies and let me go. Miraculously I didn’t even have to say anything at all. Mom applied for a long leave on my
behalf and took me Hyderabad to our home. All these while, she cared for me as if I was a small kid. She interpreted my
silence as a result of the kidnap and told me constantly to get over it. Just when she started thinking of taking me to a
physiologist, Maria interfered. She knows exactly what happened and couldn’t offer any solution to it.
I started painting again to pass the time and amazingly did many landscapes which resembled the waterfall and the forest
where I spent the longest one week of my life. Some of them come out well and dad is suggesting me to take painting
seriously. He passed this art through his genes to me. He, his father, his grandfather were into paining but never thought of
taking it as a career.
As per me, I was always afraid of Mom to declare my feeling about becoming an artist. She always thought that all these arts
are good for nothing and nobody proved her wrong. Now that I took up painting again, I realised what I missed. It was a great
support to my broken heart. I can always forget my pain and anguish when experimenting with colours. They have become my
life now a day. I set up a studio next to my bedroom at upstairs and only come down to eat. I used to do portraits before but
now I am afraid of them. I was worried that I might draw Abhi, if I start a portrait. For now all my canvases are filled with
landscapes and I was proud of them.
It might look strange but I have a longing for villages now. If possible, I want to go back to Chinturu and work there, though
Mom will never allow me now. Now that the bubble of providing healthy and peaceful life to her daughter was burst, she is
planning to keep me as close as possible. So she is using all her influence in higher circles to secure my transfer to city. She
didn’t dare to start searching for groom yet but I know that it won’t take much time. She is just giving me some time to recover.
I have no doubt that the moment I started showing signs of recovery, she will start her search with renewed energy. She is just
tolerating my love for painting for the time being. And I am basking in that temporary glory. I want to enjoy it as long as it lasts.
This much needed outing did bring smiles on all our faces. Thanks to Maria. Her husband was also very helpful. He organised
everything and didn’t even let us to pay our share of money. He said that this trip is his treat. According to him, Maria was so
distressed when I was kidnapped, she didn’t eat anything for an entire day. That whole week she prayed like mad to God for
my safety. So he decided to give me a treat once I came back. He joked that like the police at Chinturu, he was also relieved
that I came back and brought his wife back to normal life.
We reached home just before dinner and Maria came to my room before going her home. Her eyes were filled with concern
and I know that, though I managed to fool everybody else, I couldn’t fool her. She knows what I am and worried about my
wrecked heart. She is trying her best to cheer me up but she has her limits. She has to take care of her family. More over I am
a big girl and capable of looking after myself.
“Ashni, it’s been more than six months. You should get back to your normal life. At least for the sack of Aunty and Uncle you
should forget everything. They are so worried about you. I want my old Ashni back. It’s been so long that I heard a complaint. I
can’t take it anymore” her eyes were brimmed with tears.
“Don’t worry re. I am not as stuck with the past as you tend to think. Look at my paintings, aren’t they looking good. So far they
are the best paintings I did in my entire life. I am even thinking of showing them. You know talk to some art gallery people and
see if they think that my paintings are good enough for exhibition. I need to arrange for some more paintings of course” I tried
to bring spirit in my voice.
Suddenly she looked so happy. “Really? I would love to see your exhibition. All these are so nice that no art gallery can refuse
these beauties. I am very sure. I will find out the details and let you know tomorrow. By the end of this month, we will arrange
something. Meanwhile like you said, do some more paintings.” She is bursting with excitement now.
“Do you think mom will agree? She is just tolerating all this for the time being. She thought that this whole painting affair is a
passing cloud. And wants me to wrap up as soon as possible”
“Ashni, you just don’t worry about it. I know how to handle Aunty. I will take care of Aunty and Art gallery. You just concentrate
on your paintings and give me some good results. Okay?” Maria is so animated now that her expressions are very comical.
“Slow slow madam. Take it easy. There is no need to hurry up. We can do this little slowly also” I advised her. I only meant to
give her some hope about my condition. I was not serious about exhibition at all. But like Abhi, I also had a slip of tongue. Why
am I going there? I shouldn’t think about him. I lashed out myself for going back to that forbidden area and focused everything
on Maria.
At the end she made me to promise her about my painting exhibition and left in a euphoric mood. She even managed to
convince my mom. God only knows what she told her but I was amazed at her skills. That is why she was a perfect Human
Resources Officer. She knows how to talk to people. I silently thanked her in my heart. Unlike her, I can’t express my feelings
in front of a person. It takes ages for me to talk about my feelings to anybody.
It took exactly one month for Maria to arrange for an art exhibition at Srusthi Art Gallery and the response was incredible. The
owner of Srusthi Art Gallery was so impressed, he kept asking for so more of my paintings. I sold all my paintings and got so
many orders for many more paintings. I agreed for all landscape themes but polity refused portraits. I just don’t have that kind
of control in my now. His features were so imprinted in my mind that my fingers almost etch with the desire of drawing him. I
see those big, thoughtful eyes almost every day in my dreams. They never smile instead they were hostile. They look at me as
if I did a big mistake by letting them to come into my dreams. God knows that I am trying but some part of me still seeks
solace from those dreams. And that part is beyond my control.
Mom and dad were genuinely happy with my success in art field and mom is finally convinced that I can be a doctor and an
artist at a same time. Besides she is getting a kick of taking her friends to my exhibitions. I have 3 exhibitions in my account
now and all very successful ones. I was featured in Times of India and India Today and some of the renowned artists came to
my house to congratulate me for reinventing myself after that dreadful incident. Everybody said that I got lot of self-confidence
and willpower to accomplish all this and wished me best of luck.
After my third art exhibition, dad and mom came to my room that night. They were so happy with the tremendous success of
my exhibition and proud of their daughter. My mom hugged and kissed me like anything. She every offered her apologies for
not letting me do this earlier. Then they came to the point. They were successful in securing my transfer to city. My recent
fame also helped a lot it seems.
So I have to join the duties with in ten days. I was not very sure whether I want to do it or not but I wanted to try. I think that I
need to get out these four walls to get him out of my system. That’s the only way left. So I just nodded my head and took the
joining order from my mom’s hands. I know that this was all I wanted so desperately 8 months ago but now I was not so sure. I
am not that person anymore. This changed girl is no surer of her life path and emotions. Given a chance, this girl will run into
jungles and settle there. I didn’t let my feelings show and hugged mom.