CHAPTER 31
(Funny Man Rual gets it in)
The Tenacious Wolves had no earthly idea that Bob Miller was secretly circling the island in the Pterodactyl staying within 5 miles at all times. It wasn't very difficult to sneak in Rual back onto Miller Island in the wee hours of the night undetected. Rual tossed an old style push mower onto a raft to make his way to shore. It was the old school type of mower that didn't require any gasoline. The kind the frugal Amish used where the harder you pushed the faster the blades spun. You had to be in pretty good shape to get the mower to cut well. And Rual had always been able to crank out a good 50 push-ups. He had been a ladies man all of his city life. Not to mention all the bids he had done in the joint over the years instilled numerous creative ways to keep his body tone with only scant limited resources.
Rual loped along the sandy beach quickly hiding his big red rubber raft in the thickets to keep it out of site of the Wolves. Rual found Bob's sidekick Robin Hood quite fascinating but couldn't help wonder if this stunt he had planned for Judge Watts went well if maybe Dirty Bird could use a second side kick as well. It always seemed like Bob preferred to hire disabled people that he was sure would not interfere with their disability but rather meet their needs. $15 an hour to flip hamburgers would sure put a smile on just about anybody's face. Once the raft appeared to be secure in the thickets Rual piled palm leaves on top of it just to be sure.
The old style push mower didn't weigh much so Rual had no problems flipping it around and dragging it along with him. He couldn't help but whistle his favorite "Swing Low Sweet Chariot" song as he wended down the beaten path that led to Miller Island Casino. The island just seemed so much more quiet without the effervescent Fuglies smoking doobie snacks and chattering on their late night bicycle rides. The dinosaur themed mannequins flanking the path still showed off their body language as the motion sensors picked up Rual's heat as he walked along. "Damn this place is so beautiful and amazing" Rual whispered to himself. He was then startled by human screams that sounded like they were coming from the skies.
"Help! Help us please! We've been stuck up here for hours! Please for the love of God can you help us?"
Rual looked up into the skies and laughed hysterically. He wasn't having delusional symptoms like he thought he was having. There really was a couple trapped way up high on the Miller Island Ferris Wheel. What were they doing up there at this hour of the night? He looked up and shouted up to them. "Are you guys Fuglies or Wolves?" He asked not really caring either way.
The mysterious couple giggled. "I guess that depends...Are YOU a Fugly or a Wolf? Thought ole Sponge Bob square pants took all those babies back home."
Rual was getting irked by their lame humor. Should he just leave them up there to spoon with each other all night long? Why should he care about them stuck up high in the skies because of a defective Ferris wheel?
Rual cupped his hands together over his mouth so the couple could hear him from the ground. "I'm a beautiful Fugly...that's what I am...how'd you guys get stuck up in that Ferris Wheel?" Officer Piker (Speedy) shouted back from way up above. "The Misses here Amber is technically a Fugly too if that's what you are....we were just out here for a little fun....fuckn Bob....even this Ferris Wheel went on the fritz...Bob's got this whole entire Island going freaky on us!"
Rual chuckled. "Kind of like your people keep doing to our cellphones when we're up to no good? We pay our freaking phone bills ya know...not all of us like the gay little immature reindeer games you khaki wearing shirt Tuckers play on us." Amber finally cut to the chase. She was developing wolf skills just by spending time with these shirt tucking people. "I'll suck your dick...whatever you want handsome...just get me and maybe this jabrony pony down from here....were starving." Rual smiled like an alligator...he knew all of this was being recorded somewhere....perhaps this footage would bode well on the next Rise Of The Fuglies episode.
"I'll tinker with the control box and see what I can do baby girl."
Meanwhile.....Speedy prodded Amber with his elbow and whispered into her ear. "Where did that come from? He tries anything and I'll kick his ass."
"Relax honey...I wasn't really gonna do it...I'm a country girl...my dad would kill me....but hey we really need to figure out how to get down from here."
It didn't take Rual very long to tinker with the wires and get the Ferris Wheel up and running. The lights on the Ferris Wheel got so bright it almost lit up half of the Island. Once the friendly couple finally made their way to the bottom Rual never bothered to inquire about his BJ. He knew upfront Amber was joking. Bob had warned him about Amber's dark sided humor and how it could be a possible threat to his enigmatic plans for the Wolves.
The first thing Amber did when she exited the Ferris Wheel was tie her Nike shoes. It was then that she noticed the old style push mower. She was sure to comment about it.
"What's with the old school lawn mower? I didn't even know that they still made those things."
Rual showed it off. "Figured there's a shortage of gasoline on the Island by now."
Amber concurred. "You're absolutely right. How did you get left on the Island? I thought I was the only Fugly getting left behind?"
Rual proffered his cover story. "I've lived on islands before and I like it. When Bob rounded us up I hid in the thickets and I guess nobody took notice."
"Are you with anybody? Are there any other Fuglies that you know of left behind? What's the mower for?"
Rual held firmly onto the push mower as if it were a valuable.
Considering there was virtually no gasoline left on the Island it was in fact extremely valuable. He made a point of pretending Officer Piker was invisible and not present in the conversation. "Eh this is my lil money maker...you know...keeps me in shape too....last summer didn't go so well at Atlantic City pushing people around in thems Push Carts."
Amber couldn't help herself. She grabbed onto the push mower wanting to check it out. Rual pulled it back before she could grab onto it.
"Ah...ah...Ahhh...sweetheart...this is mines...but hey if you wanna work....I mean..." He couldn't help but smile as he said it. "I'm still waiting for my reward for getting you twos down from that humongous Ferris wheel."
Speedy was no longer in the mood for playful jokes and was already writing Rual off in his mind as a threat. He tugged firmly onto Amber's arm.
"Come on Amber....It's getting late....we need to get back to the hotel."