Timothy Ferriss has Enormous Balls
For those of you who have yet to come across the awesomely loopy Timothy Ferriss, I thought I might give you a brief synopsis of what his latest book The 4-hour Body tells me about this best-selling author.
A book reviewer I am not, I'll leave that to the likes of the humorous Dwight Garner at the New York Times. But anyhow, I've been following this particular fruitloop on Twitter for a while, and when I read some clever excerpts and Tweets about his new book, I was interested enough to order The Four Hour Body as soon as it was released last week.
Actually, what really got my attention was the Twitter chat about the chapter entitled 'The 15-minute female orgasm'. COUNT ME IN TIM FERRISS! You're my kind of guy. Now anyone who can give a woman an orgasm lasting 15 minutes has to be some kind of bloody legend in their own lifetime right? And I wanted to know how he did this.
So, the minute the book shop called to say The 4-Hour Body had arrived, I hotÂfooted it down there, parted with my $30 and immediately and shamelessly flicked straight to page 226. Tim Ferriss, bless him, starts by explaining on this page how strange circumstances and an encounter with someone called Vesper (don't ask, cos we all know it's a bike with a hairdryer attached) led him to his amazing sexual discovery. Cut to the chase Tim, I thought, I wanna know right now...before my weekend away with the BF!!
So, did I learn anything from speed-reading this entire chapter whilst still in the bookshop?
Hell YES....
1) Timothy Ferriss has enormous balls cos it must take awfully big ones to approach a stranger, get her to admit that she's never achieved an orgasm, and then get her to agree to let you experiment on her!
2)I have never before come across the description of a woman's intimate bit as "looking something like an Imperial Guard from Star Wars" Let's hope you weren't examining it under the glow from your bloody light sabre Obi-Wan cos that wouldn't surprise me either you weirdo!
2)Tim's 'how to" diagrams sent cold shivers down my spine cos they instantly took me back to biology diagrams in high school. Come on Tim, you could've at least had a Storm Trooper in there for added interest!
4)I had probably just wasted $30. You see, 'The 15-minute female orgasm" is a bit of a misnomer. He's written it to show guys how to give a woman an orgasm within 15 minutes. Tim you complete fraud!! Geeze mate, the BF is an absolute legend if it takes you 15 mins.
So a little disappointed but bemused I headed off for my weekend away with the book in my bag. The BF picked it up and began to thumb through it on the first evening. After being engrossed in it for at least an hour I asked him what he thought of The 4-Hour Body.
"Well, this guy has his bedroom filled with scientific instruments, regularly weighs his own excrement, and despite this, manages to pull random women and gets them to agree to let him experiment on their private bits and then sells best sellers about it oh, and he holds a world record for the most consecutive tango spins in one minute?..."
"Er, yes..."
"He's gotta be the weirdest, freakin genius around. I only wish I had his balls"
PS. Fruitloopmum Fans, Mr Ferriss also covers easy weight loss and muscle development in this new book so it's bound to be another bestseller for him. Good luck Tim!