The first thing you must be wondering is why the cover of this book is so crappy. Well, I'll tell you. I threw this together quickly to give the general idea of what I wanted as the cover but the more I thought about it the more I wanted the cover to look crappy. I wanted it to scream SELF PUBLISHED. I didn't want to pretend that this book is something that aspired to be read by the masses.
I know what you're probably asking yourself ... “Doesn't he know that most people judge a book by its cover?”
Believe me, I do. But most people won't enjoy this book. It's definitely a book geared more for the people that don't judge a book by its cover. Over the years I've had publishers and agents contact me with helpful advice and tips on how to improve my writing and be more accessible to the general public and they always seem at a complete loss when I tell them to piss off. They just can't process that someone doesn't want to be a best seller.
Just because there isn't a demand for obscure writers doesn't mean there isn't a need.
I know my limitations. I am incapable of writing some epic, transcendent story about fabulous people doing fabulous things, meticulously researched and rich in detail. I'm literally struggling to get through this introduction.
How long do these stupid things have to be anyway?
And yes, I know that you probably figured out that not judging a book by its cover is also a form of judging a book by its cover.
Life is funny. And dumb. And sad. And scary and absurd and rude and weird. That's pretty much all I'm trying to capture. The human experience is wildly erratic and I won't pretend otherwise.
Here's the thing ... if I could sing I'd have much rather been a songwriter. If I could draw I'd have much rather been a cartoonist. I can't do either so here you sit reading an introduction to a book that is one corndog away from being an odd little carnival tucked away where you least expect it.
I hope you enjoy some of the rides.