LADY SUSAN VERNON TO MRS. JOHNSON
Upper Seymour Street.
My dear Alicia,-‐-‐There needed not this last fit of the gout to make me
detest Mr. Johnson, but now the extent of my aversion is not to be
estimated. To have you confined as nurse in his apartment! My dear Alicia,
of what a mistake were you guilty in marrying a man of his age! just old
enough to be formal, ungovernable, and to have the gout; too old to be
agreeable, too young to die. I arrived last night about five, had scarcely
swallowed my dinner when Mainwaring made his appearance. I will not
dissemble what real pleasure his sight afforded me, nor how strongly I felt
the contrast between his person and manners and those of Reginald, to the
infinite disadvantage of the latter. For an hour or two I was even
staggered in my resolution of marrying him, and though this was too idle
and nonsensical an idea to remain long on my mind, I do not feel very eager
for the conclusion of my marriage, nor look forward with much impatience to
the time when Reginald, according to our agreement, is to be in town. I
shall probably put off his arrival under some pretence or other. He must
not come till Mainwaring is gone. I am still doubtful at times as to
marrying; if the old man would die I might not hesitate, but a state of
dependance on the caprice of Sir Reginald will not suit the freedom of my
spirit; and if I resolve to wait for that event, I shall have excuse enough
at present in having been scarcely ten months a widow. I have not given
Mainwaring any hint of my intention, or allowed him to consider my
acquaintance with Reginald as more than the commonest flirtation, and he is
tolerably appeased. Adieu, till we meet; I am enchanted with my lodgings.
Yours ever,
S. VERNON.