The forum participants are pretty open about the reasons why they look for paid sex. Some don‘t feel attractive enough to court young and beautiful women. Sixteen percent admitted that one of the reasons for mongering is ―You are too hopelessly ugly to get laid at home (not like Circus who can't get laid period).‖ The majority, are hostile toward American women, who they perceive as aggressive, rude and not ―feminine‖. In a poll taken at CostaRicas.Ticas.com, mongers want to know why they come to Costa Rica. Forty percent responded that they do it because ―You hate gringas and love latinas and only work at home to make money to go to Costa Rica and live.‖214
Why do they hate American women? LVSeve has been married three times; what he dislikes of them is
―having to pay for alimony.‖ 215 PacoLoco advises everyone in the sex forums not to marry American women; his reasons are different from LVSteve‘s. He hates ―The bandsaw whine of anger, anger, anger that makes American women an international horror. It's there. It's real.‖ 216 Dman agrees with him. He is still married but if he had to do it again ―I would never ever marry again a Gringa.‖ 217
CapoD2T detests American women of his age because in spite of being ―well on the other side of their best day, demand expensive dinners and wining and dining and don‘t see themselves as ―dilapidated and with wrinkled faces‖ 218 Goal accuses American women of fearing life: ― The most disturbing issue about gringas is they are afraid of EVERYTHING, too much American television I suppose.‖
Ablissman is convinced that ―I WILL NEVER AGAIN HAVE SEX WITH A WOMAN WHO
SPEAKS ENGLISH AS A FIRST LANGUAGE!!!!‖ He thinks that for American women
―EVERYTHING is a political issue. Perhaps there are reasons that have caused this....BUT I DO NOT
HAVE TO BE A VICTIM OF IT!!!‖ 219 Pacatelo not only agrees but also contributes to the thread.
For him, American women are undesirable because of their attitude: ―The women in the states have to be the least desirable on the planet, and it is the attitude pure and simple.‖220 Duardo admits that there might be some few exceptions to the rule but that most American women when they get older they leave no room for discussions or for compromise: ―Gringas are definitely on the low side of my opinion level.. Hate to sound so harsh and I dont mean it towards everyone one of them as there are some quality ladies around. But they are so, few and far between and as they have grown older and jaded it has become apparent we can not win.. SO Dont feel so bad you are in great company, as I think the large portion of single guys on this board who have visited and experienced Latin America, South Con formato: Inglés
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America and countries similar feel just like you...‖221 Bombero, finally, summarizes what he dislikes Con formato: Inglés
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HAVE SEX WITH A WOMAN WHO'S RAISED UP IN THE U.S. PERIOD!!!! American woman are conniving, selfish, manipulating, dirty bitches.‖222
This hostility is played on Costa Rican ground when the American female tourist meets the American male tourist. Let‘s see what happens when a monger finds in Costa Rica a woman his age and she reproaches him for dating a girl who might be his daughter:
True story Last trip Me & my Novia were simply walking down Avenida Central looking for sunglasses.. She is
holding my arm and we are strolling. OK now she is 19 going on 20 but real TINY.... Gringa Bitch about 45-50
comes out of the store as we are window shopping Stares right through me with vengeful eyes and says "I
CERTAINLY HOPE THAT IS YOUR DAUGHTER" .... Well my Novia Smiled, I smiled then I looked directly
back at her and said Next time I certainly hope you mind our own PHUCKING BUSINESS"...
They just can't handle the fact THEY Get old and there isn't a god dam thing they can do about it.... Think
about it we are 30, 40 50 or older plus and we can still "DATE" if we choose even in the States women that are
more than half our age... Who the PHUCK wants some dilapidated grapefruit, wrinkled 40 plus miserable
Phucking gringa... Hmm think I've had enough of the Gringas?223
Some would argue that mongers are reacting against the advancements made by women in the States during the last decades. Nevertheless, it is not so simple. Mongers admit to being also very attracted toward Latin culture, a culture they identify with warmth and a more natural attitude toward flirting and physical attraction.
I was driving downtown one day and stopped at a red light at an intersection when an incredibly beautiful Tica started crossing the street. She was enjoying all the looks of adoration and howls from onlookers when the light suddenly changed. Everyone remained motionless, hypnotized and with their jaw hanging down (at least mine certainly was!) in dumbstruck tribute and reverence... There was a moment of respectful awe and silence. No one moved to cross the intersection until she was almost gone -all four lanes were stopped in every direction for blocks, people in the back were honking angrily and we had to wait until the light changed again before we could cross! It was incredibly funny and I loved it. The women who were standing nearby watching just screamed with laughter, calling us "Canes" (from Canis familiaris) in Spanish, which means "dogs"! Things like that happen all the time in Costa Rica and are to me what make it a welcome change from the boring and smug attitude of many women in the U.S. This is also one of the big reasons why tens of thousands of American men go to Latin America every year, believe it or not! 224
O‘Connell Davidson traces similar attitudes of British sex tourists in Thailand.225 This implies that the market for these ―exotic-erotic‖ trips is for men that are unable to cope with the self-confident of the West, and there is evidence for such a thesis. Seabrok describes this situation thus: Westerners think that sex is the ultimate human experience. The young women and men of Bangkok know better. Because these farangs are so lonely, because they are such isolated individuals, they imagine that it is through sex that human beings come closer to one another. They think they see the profoundest communication in what is the loneliest experience in the world. They think like this because they are so far Con formato: Inglés
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225 J. Davidson O‟Connell, “British Sex Tourists in Thailand,” in M. Maynard and J. Purvis (eds) (Hetero) Sexual Politics, Con formato: Inglés
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away from each other, they have to reach across the empty spaces of their separateness before they touch another human being. 226
On the contrary, Latin women are perceived as feminine, submissive, warmth and willing to please men. Americans are also aware that age-asymmetrical relationships are more common in Latin America. This means that it is more common that older males marry younger women in Costa Rica than in the United States and that a middle-aged tourist with a young woman does not call anyone‘s attention.
Costa Rican women generally prefer somewhat older men and it is very common to see a beautiful 20-year-old
girl with a 40+ year-old man. I heard an American woman say to one of these girls once, "Young lady, why
don't you find a boyfriend of your own age!? Why do you go around with a man old enough to be your father?
An American woman would never do something like that." (The American woman thought the girl would think
just like an American) The girl responded, "Why don't you mind your own business"? What has age got to do
with it? And look at you! Why would any man your age be interested in someone that looks like you? You're
just resentful and jealous because no one even looks at you anymore." 227
Mongers have also erroneous beliefs about what makes Latin culture different. They think people are warmer and more flirtatious because there is no gender consciousness and no sex liberation movements.
Women's liberation, the feminist movement, and gay rights don't even exist, and the same goes for most of the
rest of Latin America except that it is even more so in countries like Brazil (yes I know there are a lot of gays in
Brazil, temporarily anyway). If you're against this kind of thinking, you should forget about living in Latin
America altogether because you'll run into a real brick wall as far as attempting to confront or change those
customs is concerned and you will turn many of the Ticos against you. 228
They confuse the political with the cultural since the women‘s movement in Costa Rica was born in the 1920‘s and there are as many gay establishments in San José as there are in Miami or in Washington D.C.
Some mongers are aware that what they get in Costa Rica is not due to political naiveté, lack of gender consciousness or ―primitive‖ gender relations, but also a performance of what Americans think Latin women should behave. One of the experts in this field, the Administrator of the most popular website on Costa Rican sexual tourism, for example, explains how the ―ideal hooker‖ should act:
Here is what I think it takes to be a good hooker in CR.
1. Provide excellent customer service, e.g. smile, be friendly, work hard to satisfy a guy, don't be a clock
watcher, provide excellent value for the money.
2. Dress nicely, wear clean clothes, don't dress like too much of a slut but still dress sexy. Provide an
appearance that a guy wants to be seen with.
3. Be dependable; if you accept a date for a certain time be on time.
4. Work smart - if you can develop a steady long term customer that pays well then take care of that guy.
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5. Learn as much English as possible to increase your marketability.
6. Try to remember this is only a way to make some good money; be friendly and remain a human being but
remember these guys are basically there just to have sex and affection for relatively short times with you.
7. Watch some really good porn videos and study how to provide super excellent bj's. No need to swallow that
stuff since swallowing is basically an extra for guys.
8. Take a shower before and after every sex episode; encourage your john to take a shower also before sex.
9. Ask him for an e-mail address if he was good to you; then e-mail him an occasional affectionate message and
if he answers then stay at it. It will drive him crazy with anticipation and might make him think you care about
him.
10. If you have been with a guy and the money was good then be very affectionate with him in public -
especially around other guys. Remember that nearly all men are extremely insecure and have very fragile egos.
Stroke his arm and leg and remember to lean your breasts on him every chance you have.
11. When you are walking in front of men remember to gently sway your hips and ass - not too much but just
enough to get them thinking you know your way around the bedroom.
12. Price competitively but do not underprice your time and skills. Think gringo pricing and tell them it will be
$89 - and smile - some of the gringos will think they are getting a bargain and all will laugh.
13. Stand and walk alone - it makes it easier for a guy to approach you.
14. Don't grope guys walking through the gauntlet - it makes you appear desperate.
15. Try bringing a "serious" book to the DB and order a drink and pretend to read the book - make sure the
book is in English. Something by Kerouac or some hip writer would be great. Guys will think you are both
intelligent and hip.
16. Establish eye contact and flirt with your eyes if you see some guy looking at you; pretend you are really a bit
shy.
17. If he asks you out for dinner - accept the offer if you have been with him before but don't charge for your
time for the dinner. Do not order the most expensive things on the menu the first time. Save the expensive
choices for later dinners with him.
18. If he offers to take you shopping, at first say no and blush. He will almost certainly ask a second time and
then you should pretend to be embarrassed and accept the shopping offer. Pick out something inexpensive that
he can buy you the first time you go shopping - save the expensive stuff for later shopping trips.
19. Tell him you are only doing this kind of work to support your mother who is out of work and your brother
who is in a wheel chair and unable to work.
20. Constantly tell the guy he is handsome and nice; much nicer than the local men or other gringos.
Note: I am available for career counseling for any DB working girls!”229
Do mongers treat Latin sex workers with the same consideration?
The answer is not so positive. Mongers are not such gentlemen and romantic as they claim to be. On the contrary, they often treat these women as chattel. Despite this strong call to secrecy and discretion, mongers break their own rules of the game. First, they freely take pictures of sex workers as ―personal‖
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memories, most of the time without their consent. Then, they post these pictures in the Internet to be shared by all members.
Moe3333, for example, asks the basic question whether the sex workers allow the pictures to be taken:
―Do the ladies of costa rica allow you to take pics usually? Do you have to pay extra or how does all that work? If they let you take some pics, what kind of pics? clothed? in the act? you know what im getting at ?‖230 Koppite answers back that some like it and some don´t. Nevertheless, the majority does not want the pictures to be in the Internet: ―Just ask-each chica has a different attitude towards pictures-some dont like them at all-some are ok with fully clothed and some will allow ‗ sin ropas’
Most however will try and insist on no internet posting of any photos.‖231 Superman thinks most of them pose for free and some even send their pictures later. ―Every girl i've asked have gladly posed, shoot one girl even took my address and sent me more photo's of herself!‖ 232
For Bilko, if women object to having their pictures taken, money can make the trick: “Just to add my experiences, about 2/3 have no problem with nude pics. half of the rest want no pics at all. A small number want money, you can decide if they are worth the extra few dollars.” 233
Don Giovanni promises his pictures are only ― para mis recuerdos únicamente‖ and he convinces sex workers to let him take the pictures with his advanced technology: ― I showed the girls the results on the LCD monitor. Several of the girls became enthused and began posing like models, and I was able to coax them into removing their clothes in the process. I was with 6 different woman, and have nude photos of 5 of them.‖234
Bombero, on the other hand, sees things differently. According to him, the women are now more apprehensive about the picture taking. He suggests that some mongers are revealing to the women where the pictures end up in Internet and in doing so, are showing them what happens in what may considered ‗secret‘ events like a bachelor‘s party.
indeed, girls are more apprehensive about fotos than ever. I was refused fotos even with their clothes on outside
the hotel...according to one, she didn't want them on the internet although she didn't say crt specifically.
that guy capo saw at the del Buey reminds me of the guy in your group that tells all the girls what transpires at
the bachelor party. he does it because he has no game other than that.235
Despite such promises, the reality is that the men would not abide by them.
Letś see how Sasha is ―shared‖ by the registered users of CostaRicaticas.com: Pinellasguy confesses he found her picture in the Internet and thinks ―she looks tremendously hot to my eyes. Anybody out there have any experience with her? Should she be on my to do list.?‖ 236 WillySp respons that Sasha is ―A definite on the to do list. Sasha provides a fantastic experience. Great massage and I had the 230 http://www.costaricaticas.com/phpbb2/viewtopic.php?t=3543
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pleasure of giving her a massage as well.‖ 237 Texcdu supports her very strongly and tells other mongers that the woman is ―great as 3some with Paola.‖ 238 Koppite recalls he had the woman for his anniversary party and he thinks, ―She is muy caliente.‖ Pelo de Gato says that Sasha works better in
―threesomes with Erica, Brenda and Jennifer.‖ 239 Scubabum advises his prospective clients to make her provide oral sex as she is ―the second best head I ever had.‖ 240 DelBuey Dave is in full agreement: ―She gives one of the best BJ's that I have ever had. She's just plain great at it.‖241 For Astroglide, ―This girl gets the trophy for phuck of the year. Her attitude should be bottled and sold for cien a bottle. I don't know how she pulls it off, but it seems like each guy is her favorito...and she knows her job is to make you feel like you are the freaking king. I know this is just a job for her...but she would NEVER let on, even on a bad day. She is that good.‖ 242
CapoD2T recognizes that mongers do not keep their promises. But he thinks the big problem is that some of them tell the women where their pictures are being shown. Those who reveal this information are disloyal to their buddies:
Why someone would do that I have no idea but it happens. I recently saw a guy bring a chica over to the
monitor in the Del Buey, and show her CRT... I do not butt in and I did not know the guy, so I have no idea if
he was a member, a VIP or what, but he did it was not the VIP section but the site itself and it was something to
do with photos as the conversation ensued….Whoever it was, was he trying to be a big shot in front of the ladies
or whatever I think that is in incredibly poor taste and an insult to us all. I am not a confrontational person nor
was it any of my business, to say something, so I kept quiet but I was sitting typing an email next to him when
he did it.. pretty phucked up if you ask me.... ! 243
Snooky is so upset by such disloyalty that he suggests punishments against the ―moles.‖: ―You should have noted his screen name (next to the