Jeff, who was sitting next to Lorna in American Airlines‘ flight to San José, after going through immigration at Santamaría‘s Airport, grabs a taxi and heads to Hotel Del Buey, where he had reserved his room three months in advance. He throws his small suitcase on his single bed and takes the elevator downstairs to the Blue Queen, the hotel‘s bar. María is sitting on one of the bar stools and greets him warmly as she needs to make some cash. After some words in Spanglish, the couple decides to have sex. Jeff pays $10 extra at Reception for having a ―visitor‖ in his room, checks María in, and elopes upstairs. They both agreed to have sex and that the price will be $100 an hour. According to Jeff, price negotiation is the hardest part of the deal. According to María, sexual practice is what she finds more difficult. ―What do you mean by that?‖-we inquired. ―It is the Gringos‘ demands that sometimes drives me crazy,‖ she says.
If you studied the sexual abbreviations in the most visited sex forums on Costa Rica, you will find a large repertoire of sexual practices.
Bareback- Without a condom.
BBBJ- Bareback Blow Job, oral stimulation of the penis without a condom
BBBJTC -Bareback Blow Job to Completion, oral stimulation of the penis to orgasm without a condom. (May
spit or swallow)
BS&TL'er: Ball Sucking & Taint Licking -( For those of you who may not be aware of this area of the male
anatomy), the "taint" was named for the small sensitive area under the scrotum. I was told about this zone by
an old military buddy of mine from Louisiana.... He said the area was so named "cuz it Taint your nuts & it
Taint your ass.)"
Cash and Dash- A rip-off. She shows up, takes your money, doesn't provide, might offer to "dance", and leaves.
CBJCBJ- Covered Blow Job, fellatio with a condom
CFS -Covered Full Service.
CIM- Cum in mouth.
Clock-watcher- A term for a provider who counts the minutes until the session is over. Usually used to describe
a provider who rushes and does not enjoy her work.
Completion Orgasm. E.g. she gave a bareback blowjob to completion.
Cowgirl Woman rides on top, knees astride.
DATY Dining at the Y- Cunnilingus, oral stimulation of the vulva or clitoris.
DFK- Deep French Kissing, kissing with tongue
FOTC- Phuck of the century.
French- Oral sex, on party
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FS Full Service- Vaginal intercourse to completion
GFE Girl Friend Experience- A subjective term, but usually used as praise for a very passionate, sensual, non-
mechanical experience. Most consider deep French kissing a baseline requirement for GFE.
Greek- Anal Sex
LFK- Light French kissing. (No heavy tongue)
NQBS Non-quitter, but spitter - BBBJTC and spits your ejaculate.
NQNS Non-quitter, non-spitter- BBBJTC and swallows your ejaculate.
PSE Porn Star Experience- A subjective term, used as praise for a provider that might have a high energy level,
a particularly hot look, or is very accommodating ("nastiness" factor).
Reverse Cowgirl- woman rides on top, facing away
Spinner a very petite provider. Etymology: From the 1970's toy, "Sit 'n' Spin” 148
Despite the broad sexual menu, there are culturally different interpretations of similar sexual acts.
María tells us, for example, the list does not tell the whole story. She says that one of the first lessons she learned by having sex with American partners is the ―never ending desire for oral sex.‖ In her sexual practices with Latino men, she adds, oral sex is less important. ―Some years ago, most clients did not care that much about it. It is American porno movies and tourists that have brought the trend.‖
María, as a sex worker, would like to finish her client as soon as possible and masturbation and vaginal sex is for her ―the techniques that do the trick faster.‖ But in the case of oral sex, ―it is harder to make them come and I have to do all the work‖- she complains.
For the Costa Rican sex worker, oral sex is not part of the traditional sexual practice. Latin men –
according to María - are more into anal sex and into large and rounded butts. Large breasts are not such a strong turn-on as they are for the American tourist. As a matter of fact, the rush of sex workers to have breast implants is a result more of American tastes than from local demand. The sex workers with silicone breasts are easily recognized as targeting the American market. Nevertheless, the Americans, as the self-poll taken at costaricaticas.com indicates, are not turned on by silicone breasts.149 Despite the American taste for the ―natural grown‖, many can not tell whether the women have had or not the operation, something that makes the professional sex worker decide to go for surgery.
According to the members of the sex forum, anal sex is also not liked by sex workers. Nevertheless, if more money is provided, it is not rejected. Badboy, for example, asks what percentage of women like anal sex. Prolijo responds that it is not popular but ―I'm sure some would take it if you offered enough dinero.‖ Administrator 3 indicates that ―the vast majority of Ticas are not into Greek, but if you are looking for it, to try the Nicaraguan sex workers.‖150
Sex workers have control over their minds and bodies through different interpretations of sexual practices. Oral and anal sex and French kissing are perceived as intimate, something to be done only to 148
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please a ―novio‖ or a lover. When Americans demand oral sex as an important part of the repertoire, they are asking for something not provided in commercial sex. The sex worker can fight back by asking for extra money or by doing it without passion, something that makes the client feel ripped off.
Many sex workers, on the other hand, perceive condoms as a barrier to intimacy. American men don‘t understand why sex workers ask them whether or not they want to use condoms. They fail to comprehend – as it will be analyzed later- the emotional implications of having unprotected sex.
Sex tourists have their own favorite sexual practices and sometimes have problems in being satisfied.
One of the major attractions is deep or French kissing. Joe1015, for example, says that his number one rule is ―lots of French kissing since making love without lots of kissing is like eating food without seasoning.‖151 Despite the strong liking for this sexual practice, many men complain that ―some of the women do not like French kissing. Astroglide, for example, reveals that some of the women avoid it. For him, ―besos is a major part of the turn on. I never even give that a second thought.‖ To prevent problems, bad breath and mouth infections, he ―brings a bottle of Listerine and do a lot of washouts on my trips.‖ Nevertheless, ―The biggest challenge is not IF I should kiss her, but finding one that really LOVES to make out.‖ This ―sometimes is a challenge.‖ ―Nothing turns me off more than a babe that seems hot downstairs, and then when I get her upstairs she turns her head and offers the cheek, or purses her lips.‖ 152
As sexual practices become loaded with different perceptions of intimacy, so does HIV prevention. Sex workers find it easier to prevent French kissing than vaginal sex without a condom. María, for example, confesses that she has more problems in kissing customers than in letting them penetrate her: ―I only kiss my lover. I don´t let customers touch my tongue, this is only done when you are in love.‖ When we asked her whether vaginal sex is less intimate for her, she answered that ―it is not so close to me because I don´t see neither his penis nor my vagina, both are too down below.‖
On the other hand, customers are stricter with regard to having vaginal sex without a condom in their non-regular relationships. Nevertheless, they do not mind taking some risks in oral sex. Most of them like to practice cunnilungus and are aware that there are some risks involved. This is also the case with French kissing and breast milk. Hotluck advises others never to ―brush your teeth prior to Oral Ops.
Can cause micro tears of the gums, mouth lining. Could be an infective path.‖- He says. He does not advise to brush after and suggests gargling. ―Less stress on the mouth. Something high in alcohol content. Listerine or Scotch, your flavor.‖ He knows, nevertheless, the majority will take their chances and each one should decide ―what your personal risk tolerance is and then go do those things.‖ His final thought is not to worry that much and to ―Have fun.‖ 153
Carla, a sex worker, thinks that mongers are very naive in their behavior: ―I sometimes have four or five clients a night. Some do not want to use a condom and are willing to pay more for it. Others, such as the older guys, love to lick my clitoris and vagina and spend a good time in this. One or two have bleeding gums or constantly brush their teeth before and after the act. Sometimes I am able to clean myself between customers, but in other times, I don‘t have neither the time nor the facilities to do so. I don´t understand why they are so conscious about using condoms for vaginal sex but don´t protect themselves with regard to oral sex.‖
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Finally, mongers are also aware that not only the client is at risk when oral sex is practiced. Jazz Musician recognizes that sex workers themselves do not know the risks they engage with their customers: ―I'm telling ya, you can't trust these phuckin' mongers, especially V-Bob. His D*ck has been everywhere!‖ They obviously cannot tell either the risks the women engage in: ―Seriousness aside, you don't know where that honey next to you in an American bar has been either. Take her out to dinner first. Unless she performs a quickie in the men's room while you're looking at the menu, you should be safe.‖ 154
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7.