The Case Of The Low Ticket Sales
Three weeks later, Barry is standing inside the office at the mental institution looking down at some invoices he’s holding. Mary and Diane D walk into the office. They walk towards Barry as Mary says, “So how are the ticket sales Barry?”
“Yeah Dad,” Diane D says. “Are they sold out yet?”
“Almost,” Barry says.
“Almost?” Diane D says as she and Mary approach Barry. “What do you mean ‘almost’ Dad? Whenever we do a show, the tickets always get sold out fast. Why aren’t they sold out so fast this time?”
“I don’t know Diane. For some strange reason, they’re not being sold out fast this time.”
“Oh oh.”
Barry and Mary puzzledly look at Diane D as Mary says, “Oh oh? Oh oh what Diane?”
“I hope the reason those ticket sales aren’t being sold fast enough is not because of me.”
“You hope it’s not because of you? What do you mean?”
“The tickets probably aren’t being sold out because people are probably afraid to come to the show!”
“They’re probably afraid to come to the show?”
“Yes!”
“Why would people be afraid to come to the show Diane?!” Barry asks.
“Because I’m sure they see me as some type of monster Dad!”
“See you as some type of monster?”
“Yeah! I mean why wouldn’t they? That little boy Marcus saw me as some type of monster! We all heard him shouting that all over the speaker phone at the police precinct last year! Some of the staff members saw me as a monster while I was visiting the organization on house arrest!”
“Some of the staff members saw you as a monster while you were visiting the organization?”
“Yeah! They’ve been speaking bad about me behind my back also!”
“They were speaking bad about you behind your back?” Mary asks. “Yeah!”
“How do you know they were speaking bad about you if it was behind your back Diane?”
“Because I can feel it Mom!”
“You can feel it?”
“Yes, I can sense they were speaking bad about me!”
“You sensed they were speaking bad about you?” Barry asks.
“Yes!”
“How?!”
“A strong intuition and feeling came over me and told me that the staff members were speaking bad about me!”
“A strong intuition and feeling came over you and told you that the staff members were speaking bad about you?”
“Yeah Dad! Then they got the nerve to want to come into the organization office to see me while I was sitting beside Grandma’s desk after they were bad mouthing me behind my back?! Behind my back they had a lot to say about me! Then when they came into the office to see me, I was sitting there just waiting for them to say something bad about me to my face!”
“You were waiting for them to say something bad about you to your face?”
“Exactly, but they didn’t say anything, even though I was waiting!”
“Even though you were waiting?! Ah come on now Diane, of course they’re not going to say anything bad about you to your face! You really think the staff members would stoop that low and say their true feelings right to your face?”
“No they wouldn’t say their true feelings to my face Dad because I can feel that they were all afraid of me! They seem to have been avoiding me like the plague while I was at the organization, and I’m not even thinking about harming them, just like that little boy Marcus became afraid of me and avoided me like the plague and I wasn’t thinking about harming him either!”
“But you DID harm Marcus Diane!”
“I don’t remember harming him Dad!”
“There are a lot of things you don’t remember Diane, just like you DON’T remember beating up Marcus inside that school hallway then chasing him down the back stairwell of that school building! Just like you don’t remember what you said to Nancy inside the upstairs hallway outside our bedrooms that night! Just like you don’t remember what happened inside that hypnosis room last year, even though your mother and I, your grandparents, your brother, your aunt, your uncle and your husband all witnessed it first-hand! Has your memory came back on any of those incidents yet?”
“No it didn’t Dad. I still don’t remember any of it!”
“Not at all?”
“No, sorry I don’t.”
“Okay then. But all of those incidents have nothing to do with the ticket sales not being sold out yet.”
“It doesn’t?”
“No.”
“So why aren’t they sold out then?”
“Because we still have time for the tickets to be sold. It’s still early, it’s not too late. I’m sure they will be sold out soon.”
“You think so Dad?”
“I know so Diane.”
“Okay. I feel a little better now.”
“You do?”
“Yeah. Well I guess the girls and I can go do some more rehearsing for the show.”
“Okay.”
The Dianettes which includes Nancy, Charlotte, Miranda, Bernice, Lonna and Kelly suddenly enter the office. They approach Diane D, Barry and Mary as Nancy asks, “So how are the ticket sales Uncle Barry?”
“It’s getting there Nancy. It’s getting there.”
“Oh good.”
Diane D turns to the Dianettes and says, “Come on girls. We got a show to rehearse for.”
“Okay Diane,” the Dianettes say as Diane D turns and hurries towards the doorway. The Dianettes turn and follow Diane D towards the doorway and leave the office behind her as Barry and Mary look at them.
Mary then turns to Barry and says, “Okay Barry, what’s really going on? Why aren’t these tickets being sold out fast?”
“Well,” Barry says. “I’m afraid to say it Mary.”
“Afraid to say it? Afraid to say what?”
“That Diane’s instincts are right.”
“Diane’s instincts are right? What are you talking about? What do you mean ‘her instincts are right’?”
“The tickets aren’t being sold out fast because people are still afraid of her after what happened to all those authority figures last year!”
“What! Oh no! Are you sure?!”
“Yes, I’m sure!”
“How do you know that’s the reason Barry?!”
“Because that’s what the people said when they called on the phone about the tickets! Believe me Mary, a lot of people DO want to see the fundraising concert and support it, but said they’re still traumatized and afraid of hearing what Diane did to all those authority figures last year!”
“Oh no!”
“Yeah! They’re saying ‘what if she goes off and gets out-of-control again while she’s on stage’! They said they don’t want to be her next victims!”
“They don’t want to be her next victims?! That’s what they said?!”
“Yes!”
“Oh God.”
“They said they would rather be on the safe side and stay away from the concert, just in case Diane goes off and gets out-of-control again while she’s on stage!”
“Oh my God!”
“Even though Diane’s suspicions are right about why the ticket sales aren’t selling, I just didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth about it.”
“Oh boy.” Mary and Barry worriedly look at each other.
Around an hour later, the Dianettes are rehearsing their stretch dance steps inside an empty studio room at the mental institution. Diane D stands in the front of the room facing the Dianettes watching their dance steps. She is wearing no ankle monitors. She then shouts to the Dianettes, “Okay girls we’re gonna try to do this step again, we got to get it right before the fundraising concert starts! Ready?! One, two, three and go!” The Dianettes continue to do the stretch dance as Diane D turns and walks around them watching their steps and moves. Diane D then looks at Bernice, points to her and says, “Hold your head a little higher Bernice.”
“Okay Diane,” Bernice says as she holds her head up higher.
Kelly then turns to Diane D and says, “Diane, we’ve been rehearsing for over three hours already. Can we get a break soon?”
“You’ll get a break in twenty minutes Kelly,” Diane D says. “Now let’s get those arms stretching, one two three stretch!” Kelly and the rest of the Dianettes continue to do stretch dance steps as Diane D continues to circle them watching their every step. Miranda stretches so hard that she almost slips. The rest of the Dianettes quickly catch her as Diane D stops circling them and says, “Come on you got this Miranda. You got this!”
“Okay Diane,” Miranda says as she continues to stretch along with the rest of the Dianettes. Diane D then walks away from the Dianettes and goes to a podium on the side of the room.
Diane D stands behind the podium and looks down at some papers on the podium then looks back at the Dianettes watching their step and movements as they continue to practice.
A few days later, the same two Latino men and the same two Latino women are in a living room inside one of their apartments as the second woman reads a flyer with a headline that reads: ‘TICKET SALES FOR THE DIAZ-DAVIDSON FUNDRAISING CONCERT!’ “You know what guys?” the second woman says. “I might buy tickets for the Diaz-Davidson fundraising concert.”
“What!” everyone else shouts.
“You are?” the second guy asks. “Yeah,” the second woman says. “How come?”
“Because I want to see their fundraising concert.”
“You want to see their fundraising concert, even though Diane D is going to be in it?”
“That’s right, even though she’s going to be in it.”
“After everything you heard she did, you still want to go to the concert?”
“Yep, even after everything I heard she did.”
“But why?”
“Because I want to see the fundraising concert and support it! Plus I want to see Diane D perform.”
“You want to see Diane D perform?”
“Yeah, I think she’s a great performer.”
“I agree with you on that part,” the first man says. “I think she’s a fantastic performer! But that psycho personality of hers has got to go! I’m still traumatized and afraid by hearing what Diane did to all those authority figures last year!”
“I don’t blame you, I agree with you there.”
“So what are you going to do?” the first woman asks.
“Purchase a ticket and go see the concert, after all, it’s for the victims of Diane D’s other personality’s wrath and their families. I think I want to support the fundraising concert for them.”
“You do?” the first man asks. “You mean you would risk your safety being in the same room with Diane D? I still wouldn’t want to get too close to her while she’s on stage, just in case she goes off and gets out-of-control while she’s up there!”
“I’ll be safe, as long as I’m far away from her.”
“As long as you’re far away from her?”
“Yeah.”
“And just how are you planning to do that?” the second man asks. “How are you planning to be far away from Diane D?”
“By purchasing tickets for seats all the way in the back of the theater.”
“What! By purchasing tickets for seats all the way in the back of the theater?
You mean in God’s country?”
“That’s right, in God’s country. I’m gonna purchase tickets for seats all the way in the back of the theater so I won’t be too close to Diane D, because if her ‘other’ personality happens to come out to the surface while she’s on stage and everybody panics and start to get out of their seats and run towards the back of the theater, I’ll be the first one out the back of the theater, that way I won’t fall and get run over and crushed to death, just in case there’s a stampede.”
“Just in case there’s a stampede?!”
“Yeah!”
“Wow, that’ll be another death that Diane D will have on her hands!”
“Didn’t she cause a stampede when she did that levitation performance in Germany a few years ago?” the first man asks.
“Yep, she sure did.”
“And she might cause another stampede if her ‘other’ personality comes out to the surface while she’s on stage.”
“Wow! Well I guess in that case, I’ll probably purchase tickets for seats all the way in the back of the theater too so I won’t get crushed to death either, in case there’s a stampede.”
“Why don’t we all purchase tickets for seats all the way in the back of the theater to see the show,” the second woman says.
“Okay,” the second man says. “Sounds cool to me!”
“Me too,” the first woman says as they all look at the flyer.