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Chapter Twenty-three
I come out of the bathroom and start getting ready for the day. I suddenly feel light-headed and sit for a while on my bed. Probably I’m way more stressed than I thought I was.
The conversation with Serenity didn’t help at all. I thought I would be better off after confessing my feelings, but it got worse. After telling her how I feel, I didn’t give her any chance to respond. I dreaded her rejection. But after hanging up I felt empty and today I feel even worse. I just keep wondering that how someone whom I met only a few weeks ago can control my emotions so intensely. My room-mate’s late night debauchery parade didn’t even succeed to distract my mind. I was awake almost the whole night thinking about almost everything that has happened in the past fifteen months. Life would have certainly been composed and happier if I didn’t do the things I did. But there’s nothing I can do to reverse my deeds and that is going to haunt me forever. As they say, “The past is a different country; they do things differently there.” I wish it was all delusive. But the nightmares I have on me are the strange reminders that the past was actually real.
I hear someone singing “You’re beautiful”, I identify the voice and it’s my room-mate.
She didn’t strike me as the nightingale type.
I head to the direction of her room and see her singing and holding a guitar with her eyes closed, oblivious to everything. But she doesn’t play the instrument, she’s just cradling it. I lean at her doorway and listen to her. After a while she opens her eyes and I smile at her. She doesn’t return the smile; instead stops singing.
“What are you doing here?” she demands seeming visibly flustered. “How could I resist a fine a cappella like that, roomie!” I say grinning. “Are you taunting me?” she asks narrowing her eyes.
“Why would you think like that?” I ask raising my brow. She just shrugs carelessly.
“You have a very enticing voice and I presume you play too?” I tell her pointing at the guitar. She nods.
“Can I see it?” I ask her.
“Do you play?” she asks handing me the guitar.
“I used to but not anymore.” I say. She doesn’t say anything. I hold the guitar and feel a sense of déjà- vu, it feels like the very first time I held my first own guitar when I was fifteen. I start to check the tuning and find a name inscribed over the corner of the guitar.
“Who is Mindy?” I ask her about the name. She looks at me as if I have grown two heads. “That would be me.” She scoffs.
Oh! My roomie’s name is Mindy then, pretty colorful.
“Okay.” I say smiling at her. Then I start playing the same song she was singing. It feels good to play after so long. There was a time when I couldn’t stay even for a day without my guitar. I close my eyes and think of the good ol’ days.
The door bell rings and I cease. Mindy holds out her index finger indicating that it’s more likely to be her call. She gets up from her bed and goes to open the door.
I examine her room and it doesn’t look like a dump anymore. She cleans up pretty well consequently. I hear her talking to someone about drugs. I can hear a deep female voice and that seems strangely familiar. I dash to the living room and find Mindy talking to someone animatedly at the doorstep. But I cannot see the person. Hearing my approach Mindy looks at me and smiles.
“Definitely not my call.” She says. Is this who I think this would be?
“Come in.” Mindy invites the person in and goes back to her bedroom.
She comes in and I stand there bewildered looking at her. It’s Serenity. She’s wearing a camouflage crop top which shows her belly button and tan shorts. She looks totally different. I stand there gaping at her in horror. How is this possible?
“Walker?” she asks perplexed. I feel my world crumble.