Two weeks into term and we did have a happy Easter. We took the family to Tenerife. We returned with brown faces and a pile of presents for Duster, Tigger and our good neighbour.
Daniel went back to school a couple of weeks ago. He has not seen his support worker since he went back.
He thinks that she might be on holiday. I telephoned Daniel’s head teacher. He told me that the support worker is a bit tied up at another school.
There is a child at the school who will not cooperate. Neither will his parents. The head teacher told me that Daniel is doing OK so the other child is the priority. He has not told Daniel. Daniel is still hoping that his support worker is having a nice holiday.
A week later and Daniel has still not seen his support worker. He thinks that she must be on holiday in a far away place like Bognor Regis. I did not tell him about the other child.
Daniel gets into big trouble at school. He has threatened Sir with a chair.
Sir said that Daniel picked up the chair and roared like a lion.
I have never heard Daniel roar like a lion. When I arrived at the school Daniel was sitting outside the staff room. His face was white.
I held Daniel’s hand as we waited to see the head teacher. Sir came out of the staff room. As he walked past us he said to Daniel “Never forget them I am a bigger boy than you.” Daniel put his head down.
We did not wait to see the head teacher. I brought Daniel home and made him a nice warm bubble bath. I left a message on the answer phone at the school.
I rang at midnight to ensure that I would not speak to anyone. I muttered something about chicken-pox then I unplugged he phone.
We are both going to have the day off work. Today Daniel will need both of us. I thought about contacting our social worker but that can wait. Today will be for us. Today we will snuggle up together and love each other. Tomorrow we will face the world.
My return to the world began at 11am with an official looking letter.
It was from Daniel’s head teacher. It must have been typed this morning and hand delivered because it was referred to as chicken-pox.
Daniel has been excluded from school until next Wednesday. We are invited to attend a meeting at school on Tuesday. Daniel’s support worker will be there. On Wednesday she will help Daniel to settle back in to school. I hope he asks her all about Bognor Regis.
This morning we all sprawled around the house eating breakfast. We are at a loose end. We have a few days to kill and nothing to do. Daniel had a good idea. Within minutes we had made an important phone call. Then we took our good neighbour a bottle of wine and a key. We are sitting in the car traveling south.
We are going to stay with Grandma in Manchester.
It is the day of the meeting and Daniel’s support worker is surprised about Daniel’s behaviour. She was of the opinion that Daniel adores Sir. Sir told her. Apparently, Sir has a wealth of experience with children who have behavioural problems. One Sunday in 1992 he took a couple of them canoeing. Since then he has developed his knowledge by appropriate reading. I wonder if he finished reading his book.
Daniel’s head teacher said very little in the meeting. He is a nice man. We have let him down. Sir came into the meeting to tell us about Daniel roaring like a lion. I was about to mention Androcles but changed my mind. No one likes a smart-arse. Anyway, I couldn’t be bothered. Our social worker said very little too. There was nothing much to say. However, she kept her eyes firmly on me in case I threatened someone with a chair.
Daniel came home from school the next day looking happy. He has seen his behaviour support worker. She has had a nice holiday.
It was a warm evening and we decided to take Duster for a walk after tea. Duster hates going for walks. He misses his cat. We dragged Duster to the river bank and walked for a couple of miles.
Daniel kept throwing a stick for Duster and I kept retrieving it. We laughed and we sang silly songs. We came home with pink faces and a bag of chips.
I am standing in the garden watching the sun go down. I have just put Daniel to bed. When I kissed him he told me that Sir wants to see me tomorrow. Today Daniel hit a girl and her shoulder might be dislocated.
I am going to watch the sun disappear. When the sky is a warm red colour I am going to go inside. I am going to telephone directory. I want the telephone number for the child and family unit.
The next day I contacted the child and family unit and it is not exactly fast-tracking towards an appointment. I spent fifteen minutes spilling my heart out to someone on the switchboard. I was told that a referral must be made. A parent cannot made a referral.
It has to be an educational psychologist or a GP. I plumped for the GP. The educational psychologist seems to have disappeared up his own goal post. I have made an appointment at the local surgery for next week. Daniel thinks that GPs do ear infections and heart transplants. I do not know what to tell him.
I went to see Sir in the afternoon. The dislocated shoulder is not dislocated but the girls parents are pretty mad. I would be too. Sir told me that he would be able to calm the parents. Then he stared out of the window and I took my cue to leave. It was a short meeting. Sir seemed to be a bit pee-d off.
A week after and the appointment with the GP was this afternoon after school. I arranged for Daniel to come home early so that he could have a bath. Daniel thinks it’s daft having two baths in one day. I don’t think it’s daft. When I was a child my mum tried to invent a bath which could eject me to outside the surgery door within a micro second of my appointment. In those days we did not have the technology. We did not have the wet-wipes either. My mums handbag housed a soapy sponge in a Tupperware container.
I told Daniel that we were seeing the doctor because he might be able to help with his problems at school. I told Daniel that the doctor knows lots of people who can help him. I explained that the doctor will email the best person. Daniel was relieved. He thought he might be ill.
Daniel read all about impotence in a women’s magazine while I went into the surgery. I explained to the doctor about Daniel’s problems at school. I gave him a brief history of Daniel’s life. He listened gently. After a while Daniel came in and the doctor told him that he will find some way to help him. as we left the doctor gave us his assurance that the referral will be made by tomorrow.
It was the day after and I did not want to hassle the doctor so I rang the child and family unit. The referral has not been made. Four days later, I did not want to hassle the doctor so I rang the child and family unit. The referral has not been made. Six days later when I rang the doctors he told me that he has not been able to make the referral. He has had a lot of hassle.
Daniel did not want to go to school today. He thinks he might have caught impotence. I told Daniel that school is the best place to find out about impotence. He could ask Sir.
At mid day the child and family unit telephoned. We have an appointment for you next week. By early afternoon Daniel’s head teacher had contacted us. I drove for an agonising hour between my office and school. Today Daniel’s head felt hot. Then Daniel’s head went all white. Daniel could not see his dinner lady. She was standing right beside him. When I arrived the head teacher took me into the staff room. Daniel was there. He was fast asleep in Sir’s arms.
It is now August 1999, a week later and Daniel said that he did not want to see a damn shrink. He wanted to play with Barney. The seeing of the shrink is an executive decision. I am the executive.
We arrived at the child and family unit in plenty of time to worry and chew our nails. The waiting room was all dressed up to look like a little nursery. Daniel sat opposite Peter Rabbit and played with Duplo. I took the opportunity to give Daniel a final reminder about calling the shrink “doctor”. Daniel does not like doctors. Doctors let his baby sister die. Daniel decided to call him “Mister”.
Daniel delighted Mister. Mister was intrigued with Daniel. Daniel explained to him that when he is angry his head gets hot. When his head is hot everything inside his head goes red even his brain.
Daniel said that he only gets red angry at school. Mister asked Daniel why he never gets red angry at home. Daniel was surprised that he did not know. To Daniel it was easy. He explained that it is because he loves us very much. If you love someone very much you do not get red angry with them. I did not know that.
We were there for about an hour. Then Daniel went for a cup of tea with his dad. I stayed and talked to Mister for a while. I told him I believe that teachers have let Daniel down. I told him Daniel believes that doctors let his baby sister die. Mister said that Daniel is a lot like me. I reminded him that Daniel is adopted.
Mister gently repeated that Daniel is a lot like me.