Chapter Eighteen
I was thinking I would like to try and touch on the subject of magic a bit.
As in 'The gathering'?
Yeah. No. That was fun too though, like all around sleight of hand to spell casting. I think it is a good subject to talk about while I have a great source for answers right here with me.
I agree, not many honest authors write about the subject.
You are judging people, that's not like you.
I was not!
Seems to me that you were making a partial statement, are you one sided on this or what?
No, I don't judge! I wouldn't even want to be a judge! Hell, everyone behind bars hates you, you can't tell if your friends are real or if they're just kissing your ass, and the connection you have to have with me? Let me tell you, you think talking to me once in awhile takes effort, try being a judge! These people have to keep a constant vigil on their senses and feelings just to be able to sleep at night. Much less, worry about some convict getting out of prison with a chip on their shoulder!
It still gets me to hear you talk like that.
What, when I say ass and shit, and other bad words?
Yeah, stop that!
You are the one typing it besides, if someone is grown up enough to actually read this book, and be interested in it, they are not going to be offended.
I guess you're right.
So I just got back from getting a hair cut- well, my hairs cut as you would say. It was 20, not 15 bucks.
Jesus where'd you go?
Hey, if I can't use Jesus as a swear word, you can't either! So are we making an agreement then?
Guess we should both try and start using a little better language huh?
That's a good idea, especially if you are really gonna be a health insurance consultant.
Yeah like Anthony says, "You're not sellin' surfboards, dude."
Hahahah ha. He got you to listen though didn't he?
Sure did, and a good thing too, him and Woody had to really drive that lesson home for me to get it.
You mean listening?
Yes, I owe them more than they could know.
And look at you now; you listen so well you can even hear me!
Yeah, but I still can't hear my boss in the kitchen half the time cooking on the line when he hollers what kind of wings he wants from me.
Divine dichotomy.
You can say that again. Anyway, about the haircut, it was really only 12 bucks, but I gave her the twenty, it was really nice talking to her.
And what, you want us to give you an award?
Come on now, be nice. She and I were talking about how she went to cosmology school and ended up learning things like how electric currents worked and other off-the-wall things that had nothing to do with hair. I told her that there are other types of cosmologists as well, such as the ones who work in a wide array of fields from astronomy to metaphysics.
Like the guys you see on the movie 'THE SECRET.'
Right, they are talking right alongside authors, scientists, physics experts, and religious leaders. She was laughing because she told me there was a girl in one of her classes that was always complaining in a ditsy voice, "I came to cosmetology school because I'm not smart enough to learn all this other stuff!" I told her cosmologists are some of the smartest people in the world who knew the most things about the most things.
Were you trying to give her a big head or something?
No, I was just helping her to see herself from a different point-of-view. Helping her see how much she REALLY was and I could tell by the time I left, she did. I also told her that if it would have been explained properly to me in high school I may have taken cosmology and gone onto college.
I'm on your side there is a huge wall of stereotypes to climb over for young men who choose cosmology as a course of study, but it is one of the most extravagant fields.
Yeah, it sounded like the schooling was training to be a 'Renaissance man', as you so eloquently put it before.
Sounds like you had a great conversation. We did.
I bet she really liked you. You didn't even ask for her number did you?
Of course not!
Why not?
I asked myself that when I left, and I could see it in her eyes. I had already told her the story of the cop pulling me over and all that stuff and she was like man, that's some bad luck! She liked me.
I see why now.
Yep.
You could not be anymore wrong! You actually think your luck is so bad that anyone around you will share in your struggles and thus you will burden them, huh?
That's it, which’s exactly what I came up with after I left.
Jesus.
Hey! We made a deal!
Yeah, but really JAY, give me a break.
I just figure, I’m better off alone. No one needs me around 'ALL THE TIME' in order to live an awesome life. If they were around me all the time, they'd hate it.
You're exactly right.
Why do you tell me I'm wrong and then tell me I'm right? You always do that! You just like to get me worked up I bet!
I do, I was just agreeing with you on Aine's behalf.
My ex-girlfriend? Hahaha. Hell no, she would agree too. She was a gem that one.
Yep.
She taught me a lot of what not to do's that's for sure. I think she carries happiness with her like I do. She's an awesome person.
She would be happy to hear you say that.
Oh, she has.
Yeah, but then you turn around and call her a cu.......
Don't you dare! Let's seriously try and watch our language. My kids (that I may someday have) may read this.
Okay. Okay. I'm just saying, stick with it buddy.
I know, let's leave it at that. I know what you want me to do, and I will.
So she'll get a copy?
Yep, when it's finished.
You really are trying to cover all your bases here huh?
Ya never know when you might be checking out.
Be positive, it works wonders.
So next I wanted to tell you about the guy I saw when I was walking out of the Goodwill store where I just had purchased my, slightly used, but new to me, second pair of khaki pants.
What about him?
He was wearing a Jason mask on the top of his head. I thought maybe I should look at him suspicious, then the thought crossed my mind, "Who in the heck would rob the Goodwill?"
Haha.
So I smiled and nodded, and so did he.
That will be on the news tomorrow, watch.
No, it better not be!
Unless it's not, just kidding anyway.
What, I'm not allowed to have a sense of humor? So, we were going to touch on magic a bit?
I thought to touch on it a bit, yes. People now days know simple sleight of hand tricks- we see street magic. We read in books of incantations, and spells that may woe a lover or drive away unwanted disease. I remember the first book I ever read that seemed to contain some actual truth on the subject. It was Douglas Monroe's, "The 21 Lessons of Merlyn."
Ah yes, and you revisit this subject now for this reason alone?
No, it is like I said before many people are interested in such things. One of my good friends Bobby is actually writing a book on how to produce authentic oils and tinctures. The subject came up a few nights ago and made me start thinking about it is all.
Let us start by me asking YOU a question.
Okay.
Do you have any doubt in your mind that if you grew up in an archetype such as read about in your fantasy books, that you could not turn out just as magickal?
Ummm honestly? No, I don't.
So you believe if you grew up in a place where all your time was spent in the study of magickal arts, you could become so called 'Magic'?
I think I see what you are getting at.
Do you? Another thing to consider is this: If you were to somehow be whisked away to this magickal realm abruptly, would you be able to grow into what you have called 'magic'? Or have you been TOO conditioned to unbelieve it?
This is the thing; there have been times in my life that I have felt a burning inside me, a fire welling up within, screaming to me, "You were made for something special! Get out of here! What are you doing mopping that floor in an Arby's?" And as intense as that desire can be, I may have never allowed myself to 'take the plunge' so to speak.
So you think that perhaps, if at the moment you became aware of that feeling, that desire within you to leave that Arby's, you acted upon it, then it may have actually happened?
I would say yes except…
Except what?
I did leave that Arby's; I dropped the mop and took off.
What was the feeling you had? What was so important you had to just up and leave at that very moment and risk your job?
It will sound silly.
Don't make me go there with you again just tell us.
Okay, I felt a mixture of jealousy and destiny.
Jealous of what?
The girl I knew should be with me was talking to some other guy who thought she should be with him, or something like that.
And destiny?
The feeling made me stop in my tracks and take a good long look at my life. Keep in mind I was but 18 at the time.
So what did you see?
I told myself I was better than this and that I was never put on this earth to be jealous. I was put on this earth to be something great! I believed at that moment, that somewhere I had taken a wrong turn. Without thinking I left and went straight to doing what it was I loved to do.
Masturbation?
No! Geeze!
Sorry, just couldn't pass that one up. I'll be good.
But no, martial arts and druidism. Strangely, the ninja's and the druid's had striking similarities when it comes to the elements and training systems. That was, in fact, one of the first things during my studies that made me think that something more was going on in this world than met the eye.
So these areas of studies preoccupied your mind physically as well as spiritually huh?
Exactly, not that I ever considered myself a druid, but I did once or twice in my life, confidently call myself a Ninja. Indeed, I drove a ninja car, wore a ninja suit, and taught ninja classes.
I think you should point out that the druidism you speak of was of Welsh origin and in no way sacrificial or satanic.
Of course.
And whatever came of this druidism kick?
I played with a few concepts, and tried a few rituals (with surprising results), but the influence and open mindedness it brought was what was most beneficial. It made me start to look for examples in nature. Also, it really gave me a passion for learning. Druids would have to learn upwards of 25,000 axioms and aphorisms in a lifetime! So all in all, it opened me to learning ancient teachings and exploring other languages.
This coincidentally, was about the time you started losing interest in school.
I would say coincidentally yes. This also was happening about the same time as my first true experiences in teaching, when I began to teach the things that I knew of to my next door neighbors. My knowledge exploded!
And what sparked their interest in such things?
They would see me in my ninja suit next door after school climbing the telephone poles, leaping off of the carports, turning somersaults, playing with swords and doing all sorts of strange stuff!
At this point did you feel you were experienced enough to take on such a task of teaching?
Experienced yes; knowledgeable enough, no. Why not?
Because I had never completed any formal class, I had only taken bits of martial arts from many different classes until I got bored with the repetition. Then I would add the knowledge of what some friends would help out with, what I would see in movies, what I knew from my past experiences, and what I had read in books. Let me add, not just martial arts self-help books either, but philosophy books, physics books, magick books, etc. They all helped me create lessons.
Interesting.
Let me ask you something.
Sure.
Why is it I feel that I learned so much more TEACHING martial arts then I did when learning martial arts?
What is it you are trying to get at here?
I mean, I could teach things that I knew absolutely NOTHING about, and by the end of the lesson I KNEW I was right. There were some things I had only a concept about, maybe had seen once or twice, and after teaching them, it was like I perfected it.
Not only does the drive for honesty help you in these situations, but also the creativity of experiencing whom it was you choose to be. I will tell you something now, if you have ears to hear: THE FIRST TEACHER BEGAN WITH NO KNOWLEDGE
Then where do the lessons come from?
Memory acts like a wave, dipping into the bank of universal memory with each time you try and access it. Trying to do something, or learn, is kind of like trying to unlock a door with a key of soft metal, and over time, the key will shape itself to the tumblers. It only takes so many turns of that key in the lock, so many dips of your ladle in the ocean of memories, for them to finally set. I will put a diagram on the adjacent page to further explain for those of you who are more visual learners. You ask about magic, I tell you now, anything is possible if you set your mind to it.
