Hao- the attitude of ignorance
Hao – used in so many ways by a typical citizen of Indore- the mango man – Bhiyaaa Indoriie. One of the most famous usage and applied part of Hao is to depict your indifference. Hao is at times used to express your lack of interest. When you wish to express an ‘I don’t care attitude’ to something said, you use Hao.
Being an Indoriee and saying Hao to something might actually mean that I respect you as a person, you are valuable to me and that’s why I gave my kind attention to you, I listened to you but what you said; the story you just shared, the idea you communicated is of no relevance to me. It is fake, false or may be too shallow to focus on and so I am saying “hao”.
While the entire world and all the sensible people on earth talk about awareness, pro-activity, agility, vigilance, go-get-it attitude; am I an insane lady who is asking you to practice the attitude of ignorance?
Ignorance which means to avoid something, a kind of denial to face a certain thing in itself sounds so negative. It requests you to remain passive. It seems like a weird idea superficially, we are not zombies who are supposed to live a lifeless life but what if we give a more insightful meaning to the same. Suppose if Hao means an attitude to ignore and if we start practicing it. If you are the sweet innocent girl in the college; give a Hao attitude to the cheap guy who just broke your heart and started running behind some other girl. If you are a dedicated, hardworking employee carry a Hao attitude towards the office politics, rumors and the grapevine going behind your desk. Gift a Hao attitude by your smiling face to the neighbor who tried to defame you in the last society meeting, If you are a student preparing for an entrance give a Hao attitude to the fear of failure. Facing predicaments in life, feeling depressed since long, you need to give a Hao attitude to your own self; the wrong self-concept which you have created within your mind about your inner-self. You are not meant to remain sad, monotonous, depressed. Learn to take yourself lightly, release the baggage of those emotions which are burdening you. Even a small attempt can make a big difference.
The aunt who lives near to my home is a cute caring lady, she loves me like her own child, and at times she cooks palatable dishes for me. I love her for the understanding and the bond which we share. One fine day she came to my home- with those tasty home-made aunty trademark cookies; the cookies were as awesome as the heart of Jose aunty while me and my cousin were lost in the delectable taste of those cookies she started to share the story of a neighborhood girl, who is having an affair with a near-by guy. Although the entire story shared by her sounds like Sham has a cow, Ram has a buffalo, one fine day one buffalo said moo to another buffalo, the other buffalo replied with a bigger moooo out of anger and than their life became moo-moo. I mean the discussion was sheer nonsense, a meaningless time-killer. The gang of women which settled at my place to enjoy the home-made cookies began to give character certificate to the people around as if they have never committed any mistake in their life, the flawless super humans. These iron ladies are absurdly blind to their own faults but they can identify even microscopic flaws of others. It depends on me to relish those cookies and indulge myself in character certification ceremony: the best way to kill my time, energy and emotions in gossiping or to bring a change simply by using my Hao attitude. Here I am expected to follow the life-saving principle of “ignorance is bliss”.
If I choose not to entertain the gossiping drama and end the story by being a bit reluctant to it- generalizing it as hao, things are changing with time and bringing the attention of my group to something positive, something useful- may be the recipe of the cookie. I simply used my Hao attitude smartly in order to divert the attention of the group on something more meaningful. It was a usage of Hao-bajji in a polite diplomatic way. Doesn’t that affect us more? The gossip may not bring any change in our life but learning to cook something new can bring smiles on the faces of our family members, encourage some of us and their cooking skills, motivate some of us to try something new. Gossiping is like a necessary evil. In fact it is a part and parcel of every aspect of life be it office, home, social circles or interpersonal relations. It is important to gossip too; for it helps to ventilate our emotions but it should not be given more attention than required. Let us just respect it as a way of ventilating and emotional vomiting. Gossips are to be heard, ignored and forgotten. Our focus should always be on something life changing, something positive or anything that is making an actual difference in our life. Day in and day out we face many such situations in our life because of our surroundings. Sometimes in office, sometimes in classroom, at times even with our spouse. It is good for our mental well-being if we learn to ignore the unnecessary things and focus on what really matters. Tony Robbins rightly said, “One reason so few of us achieve what we truly want is that we never direct our focus; we never concentrate our power. Most people dabble their way through life, never deciding to master anything in particular.”
The key to self-orientation is nothing but Hao; the attitude of ignoring the irrelevant and focusing on priorities. A successful man is the average man who is goal-oriented, focused on the right things. I love the way one of my elegant and a dynamic friend; an HR professional of a reputed IT firm describes it. She says; focusing is defocusing from all the rest, but focus. In order to remain focused, one has to adapt to ignore the insignificant and trivial things happening around us. If I keep on giving importance to everything happening around me, my attention will be diverted; Chances are I might miss on something which is urgent and important just because I was engrossed in everything. If I involve myself everywhere I will reach nowhere.
After such examples, ignorance doesn’t really sound as bad as we initially perceived it because now we are relating ourselves not with the literal word but the hidden meaning. Of course it hasn’t brought a complete paradigm shift in us but at least gave a new perspective.
Someone has written it so smartly “Weak people believe in revenge, strong people believe in forgiving and intelligent people believe in ignoring”. You cannot master everything, it becomes essential to identify your passion, ignore the rest and work on the same.
The first lesson of the Hao philosophy is learning the art of ignoring and becoming tactful enough to deny something in a polite ,positive and yet assertive ways.