8. Divorce
Unfortunately these days more marriages end this way then through what marriage was originally meant to be a lifetime bond which was ended only by death.
There are many reasons why marriages fail but I think the three biggest reasons are lack of trust and communication and settling in the Chapters: The Role of a Man and The Role of a Woman I’ll explain what I mean by settling.
Communication you always hear relationship experts say communication is the key and they are right. The minute you stop talking, the minute you stop listening is the instant you doom your marriage.
Whenever something bothers me about one of my wives I speak to her directly, I don’t gossip about them with the other wives or with my friends. I speak to her and we deal with our issues that very day. We won’t go to sleep until we have resolved it even if it means talking about it the whole night. Which sometimes creates issues with the other wives as it might interfere with their plans.
The point here is that we have a clear line of communication if anybody has an issue with someone else they address that person directly and they deal with the issue. We don’t hold grudges.
Trust my wives have often spoken to me about their friends who’ve thought that their partners are cheating on them and they’ve come up with ingenious ideas of how to catch them in the act.
Which is saddening, to have so little faith in someone that you choose to continue to be in a relationship with and whenever I ask why she hasn’t left than the answer is always the same they don’t have proof. When I ask what happens after they catch them again same answer all the time. A. she dumped him and b. she took him back there is no A or B just an A & B.
Yes some women when they leave a man they leave but other’s return and they say my wives have low self-esteem.
Diana shared a story with me of a friend of hers who’d caught her boyfriend cheating by following him and when she eventually caught him it was with someone she considered a friend. She kept the guy and lost the friend and hardly two months had passed before he did it again. For me the worst part of all this was that her friend had apologized and he hadn’t because: A man is never wrong so he never needs to apologise
And she kept staying with him and waiting for him to see the error of his ways and one day he did he found his Diana and left her, she’d wasted five years of her life on a man who didn’t think anything of her because to this day his remained faithful to his wife.
So the question is what do you do when you’re partner cheats well the answer is simple you forgive them, but this only applies to someone who you are married to. If you are only dating and they cheat what will happen when you’re married?
This applies to both men and women the only difference being that if the circumstances are right you should not only forgive your husband but you should encourage him to take the women as a Sister Wife, the conditions under which this must be done are listed after this section.
So when is it okay to divorce for me the only time it’s okay to divorce is when you’ve tried everything in your power and it just wasn’t enough.
When the person you are with will only bring about your downfall and staying with them will mean you straying off the path and your soul being damned.
Only when that happens is it okay to divorce, always remember like with any job where you want to succeed marriage takes a lot of hard work.
The other thing which I should cover before we move on is that once you have children you relationship changes, you go from being a couple to being parents and most of us forget the fact that you are still married to a man or a woman of flesh and blood who still has needs, needs which didn’t just disappear because you became parents.
Make no mistake I am a father first and a husband second but just because I have the one doesn’t mean that I neglect the other. To me they are a package deal. If it wasn’t for my wives I wouldn’t have my children and I wouldn’t have my children if not for my wives. So how can I celebrate and appreciate the one while ignoring the other?
Remember like with any job where you want to succeed marriage takes a lot of hard work.