This year was the year I wanted to have a child again. I was not aware if my desire had been heard by the angel.
One the day in 2011, I dreamed of a verse,
"Hal jaza ul ihsani ilall ihsan"
…but I heard a little distorted to my hearing.
The voice that reads this verse seemed to tell me or to warn me about something important. I thought it could be due to I was thinking too much about getting pregnant. I tried to search the meaning in the Quran, but I failed to find anything. I was just looking for ‘Ihsan’ in the Quran, but my eyes didn’t see thoroughly enough to find it and several months had passed.
One day, as I was hearing recitation of the Quran, I heard these words appeared and it was from the Ar Rahman. Masya Allah.
The verse of ‘Ihsan’ that I thought ‘kindness’ could mean that I should be doing more kindness in this world so I could get pregnant. But the whole meaning in the Quran was actually had different meaning for my acknowledgement.
The Quran said, Ihsan that I should be doing more was to get me into His Heaven! The ‘Heaven’ is the gems that I wanted to conceive and not the ‘child’.
I was shocked to learn this meaning. All praises and gratitude is to the Almighty!
The verse means; ‘There is no return of kindness without kindness'. – Ar Rahman.
The interpretation about this verse was quite controversial to me initially.
The ‘offspring’ that I thought could be something I needed in this world as a Return of my kindness, was actually a ‘Paradise’.
My observation of this verse was quite true in the sense of how the verse revealed itself to me.
The verse is a closing passage for those who entered the Paradise of Muqarrabin.
The Paradise of Muqarrabin is the RETURN place for those who had compassion, kindness and good deeds (Makam Ihsan).
O God, You had showed me the Makam Ihsan (Ihsan State), and now guide me to the path of Muqarrabin. Amen.