When the covid pandemic hit the world, I was having an illness due to tuberculosis (TB) infection for almost a year and the post-TB recovery was a little bumpy for me.
The moment I completed my medication, I had severe attacked on my nervous system due to lack of nutrients and body weak. The nerves damaged by prolong used of TB drug which has a huge impact on my stamina, muscle and bones density.
I was getting weird signs about my own health that I ignored. The post recovery had brought me to another type of illness that I did not understand the underlying caused. Though I had recovered from it, but I am writing here the important signs I received, for us to learn.
Prior to this incident, I met with the figure of Rihul Ahmar in my dream, in the month of November 2020. The figure of a man with dark tan skin.
He said to me, ‘I am coming to propose you, can I ask your mother's permission to come for the proposal? ‘.
I told my mother, the fact that I am getting married soon.
Mom asked, ‘who are you going to marry to? ‘.
I replied, ‘whoever come first, he will be the one I marry’.
I startled from sleep. The dream conversations sounded quite fun, about getting married again when I had already married here in this world.
All the interpretations showed that those signs will not be pretty. Soon after that, I fell ill again.. but the illness was absurdly strange.
In the King Solomon’s time, it was said that Rihul Ahmar came to Solomon. Solomon asked ‘who are you’. He said, "I am eternal until the Day of Judgment comes, no one can destroy Me but Allah."
My reluctance to ignore the warning before the event happened, led to disaster.
I received an uninvited visit from Rihul Ahmar in this world. He (the Wind spirit of Rihul Ahmar) had the power to paralyze my body and my mind. Not only did the wind came to attack me but it had reached my brain and my memory lost. I felt the difference in my system.
My energy gone vanished slowly. In the confusion, searching the cause of this injury, I found myself lived alive but dead. My body and mind were NOT my self.
God showed me how anxiety and depression felt like in this world and this illness had attacked many children of the end times.
Could a normal human live without sleep day and night for three consecutives months?
The fact that I am not the God of the Universe, the unsleepiness had triggered me into emptiness. It was not about sleep disorder but I wasn’t been able to sleep at all!
Days goes by extremely slow, I have passed three months and I have lost four (4) substances in my life.
My look, money, personality and the key to my prayers.
I prayed but prayers were not submitted
I lose my ‘personality’ (my soul spirit)
I lose my clothing (my wisdom)
I studied day and night, my physical body; the energy, the breath and the unstoppable mind.
I said, ‘God! if you don’t heal me sooner, I saw darkness is coming to me. Have mercy on me’.
God had taught me the meaning of Life after Death in this world. My soul carries the Wisdom has gone during my lost time. She left this body!
I lost the wisdoms, the words of God (Quran verses) were not found in my memory to be remembered.
I surrendered my FLESH to the AlMighty God.
My body and mind were no longer myself and I learnt to live without binding my soul to this body frame. I detached them and lived on knowing that my mind was NOT me.
If you lived according to the flesh you will die, but if you lived with the Spirit, you will live alive.
I acknowledged the emptiness and I lived only with a mercy of God. I learnt to understand how to revive from emptiness back to fullness.
The revival must be filled with the substance of God.
He saved me. He is my Savior.
God wanted me to feel 'Crazy' so He emptied me for a while.
It was destined that He wanted me to learn His creation, His science, that made by flesh and blood.
The science that I have learnt here is invaluable. Our body is just like a star in the universe. My star was dimming because the source of power wasn’t strong there. When energy vanished, my soul spirit left the body. My strength is within the energy that God gifted.
God taught me the power of patience and importance of physical science. No medication can cure this illnesses. The science about minerals and nutrients to power up the source of energy is critical. I was guided by God to take high dose of magnesium, calcium, zinc, Q10 and vitamins while patiently wait for recovery with loads of du’a prayers.
Alhamdulillahirrabbilalamin.
On the fourth month, I healed miraculously.
God saved me! He is my saviour.
In my dream they told me about losing four(4) substances in my life during this darkest months.
Remember, the evil can consumed your body and mind while you’re in emptiness. But the TEST only meant for a short period. Unsteadiness of ‘body and mind’ should not stay longer than it should. You should be healed by the Mercy of God to be able to pass His TEST.
I have been given back all my four substances, in exchanged for the energy to write and to translate this book to the end.
Some verses that have gone in my darkness time, now all have been restored.
The Ar Rahman verses that I sing in my early morning prayer (subuh) with a long standing qiyam, one day had showed me its miracle.
That night I met with two good looking gentlemen on my right and left. They were almost same height, same size, same age. These two good looking gentleman followed me everywhere I go. I noticed that they accompanied me without jealousy between them. Though the dream was short but the feeling of Heaven has lived in me ever since then. Trust Ruh Allah (Holy Spirit) in His Kalimah, Words.
Nah, the meaning of 'Hurum maghsuratum fil qiyam' showed me different understanding as I thought the verse only meant for men to receive benefits as in ‘maidens’ to accompany them that are pure like rubies and pearls. So ‘Lam yathmithhunna insun qablahum wa jaan’ had something new to learn.
They were both God’s new creation, to accompany me in heaven. The miracle of this verses that I recited, not knowing that the pure ‘maidens’ were also the ‘male’ beings.
Ever since I saw the miracles of the huroofs, my ability to put more Quran verses into my heart had grew stronger than before. God gifted me the easiness to embrace His words.
Now I know why God had planted me with His Wisdom.
The Unseen was once told me in the beginning of my journey, that I was the Goddess of Wisdom (Ratu Ilmu Putih, 2010). But I took many years to realise and to acknowledge their words.
I have come to my senses now that I am indeed the wisdom being of God. I am His servant that uphold Bismillah (the words of God), witnessed the living huroofs (alphabets), the angels, the knowledge of lauhul mahfudz, the heaven spirits, the Prophets and importantly to spread their words about the Day of Reckoning and the coming of the Judge.
I saw the Coming Judge (Isaiah) will carry the words of God, ‘Bismillahirrahmanirrahim’, for Peace, Love and Humanity. He brings Humanity to the world.
No religion’s mission. No war mission. No killings.
Stop fighting for your religion!
Religion is NOT a ticket to Paradise but your FAITH is !
I am not sending these messages to teach…but to let you know the words of God you may have forgotten.
I knew there will be evil and good regardless, the war will come and so the Dooms day will happen. It has been written and all will happen.
Coronavirus is the warning for children of the new age to be prepared mentally and spiritually on what’s coming up in the future.
They will survive the pandemic but not you! They lose their parents in this world but they will be stronger and be independent for the new world.
Though 2021 has come to an end, the covid19 story has never ended. The variant continued to re-appear on earth and it is a warning that our generation has come to the end.
Our chapter soon will be gone much earlier than we thought.
And I felt my day is getting closer….
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