It’s Saturday afternoon. I’m hanging up washing, while Angel reads in her room. Carlene’s drinking with Bobby and two of his friends. They ride Harleys, look like they haven’t had a run-in with soap and water for a decade, and they keep offering me a sip of their beer. Yuuuck!
I keep out of their way and ensure Angel locks her room door shut.
After I finish with the clothes, I walk into the living room where Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper is blaring, and balk.
Glenda Washington, the social worker, who I fear more than God, is sitting among Carlene and her loser friends.
“C’mon sweetheart,” one of the guys says to Glenda, ‘have a beer.”
“Eh, no, thank you,” Glenda says and smiles. She cranes her neck to look outside as if she’s waiting for something.
I’m horrified -- the place is a mess – dirty dishes in the sink, the bathroom is littered with unwashed laundry, the lounge ashtrays are overflowing with cigarette butts, and there’s a bong lying on the table.
“Glenda, hi,” I say, fighting to control the hysteria in my voice.
She stands up. “Hello, Burn, how are you today?”
I drop the washing basket and shrug. “Okay. Just doing some washing. I wasn’t … did we have an appoint …?”
“No. But we do impromptu visits.”
“I see,” I say, my stomach churning at the thought of her report.
She leaves without saying much, adding to my confusion.
Deeply disturbed, Angel and I dress to go out with Trojan. It’s our second date and once again, he’s asked me to bring Angel along. Is he a cool guy or what?
He arrives on time and walks up to the house. When he sees Bobby’s friends, he doesn’t look happy.
“I know, I know,” I say before he can even voice his objections. “Let’s just get out of here.”
Just as we are about to leave, Glenda returns, this time with four police officers in tow.
My mouth goes dry at the sight of them.
“Burn, we’re here to take Angel,” Glenda says in a firm voice.
My heart falls to my ankles. “W…what?”
A female officer takes Angel’s hand.
Without thinking, I slap her hand away, grab Angel and shove her behind me. “Why? Why, Glenda, why?”
“Look behind you, Burn,” Glenda says. “Look.”
I spin around. The cops are handcuffing the two guys Carlene was drinking with.
“They’re convicted felons, Burn. One is wanted for rape. This place is totally unsuitable for a child,” Glenda says. “They’re smoking marijuana when there’s children around.”
“Glenda, I will fix it, I promise,” my voice high and shrill. “I won’t allow them here again. Ever. I promise.”
Glenda cocks her head at me.
I pull Angel close to me and look at Carlene. “Tell her, Carlene. Tell her we will fix it. Tell her!”
Carlene nods, looking terrified herself.
A cop approaches Trojan, his hand on his weapon. “You got some ID?”
“Why?” Trojan asks.
The cop’s hand tightens around his gun.
Trojan hands him his ID. The cop radio’s in Trojan’s details.
The female cop grabs Angel’s arm again.
“No!” Angel cries. “Don’t let them take me, Burn!”
I spin around and shove off the policewoman. “Leave her alone!”
The cop staggers back. “Do that again and I will cuff you,” she warns.
I hold Angel close to me. “You’re not taking her. I will fix …”
The policewoman grabs Angel and pulls her off me.
“…it. Leave her alone!” I scream and pull Angel back.
“Burn, stop!” Trojan says. “Calm down.”
“I will fix it!” I repeat. “Don’t take her! Please! Please!” I look at Glenda. “Please, Glenda!”
The female officer suddenly bear hugs me from behind, while Glenda grabs Angel and rushes her into a waiting cop car.
“Burn!” Angel screams. “Burn! Burn! Don’t let them take me, Burn! BUUUUUURN!”
“ANGEL!” I scream. I squirm around and wrestle with the policewoman.
“I’m gonna pepper spray you!” she warns.
I don’t care if she does – they’re not taking Angel. “Angel! Angel! Glenda! Glenda! I will fix it, please! Don’t take her please! Please!”
The cop holds tighter.
“I beg you, don’t take my sister. She needs me. She gets scared at night. Please! She sleeps with me, Glenda!”
Glenda shuts the car door, locking Angel inside.
“Leave me the fuck alone!” I cry as I manage to turn around and hit the officer on the nose with the heel of my hand – so hard, my hands hurt like hell. She releases me and holds her nose in agony.
I run to Angel. “Erro! Hawk! Help me!”
Trojan grabs me and shoves me against the wall. “Burn, stop!” he says. “We’ll get her back. They’re gonna arrest you. Stop!”
“NO! They’re not taking her, Trojan.” I knee him in the groin, and as he bends over in pain, I run towards the car, dodge two more officers, and finally get to the car. Through the window I see Angel crying. I bang on the window.
But the officer driving the car speeds off with my sister inside.
I run after the car with two policewomen in tow. “Stooooop!” I scream. “Stop! Stop!”
As the taillights disappear from sight, I fall to my knees and sob. “No! No! No! Please… please …”
A cop hoists me up, shoves me against a car and cuffs me. “Assaulting a police officer,” they say as they throw me into the back of a police car, “is a serious offense.”
As they drive me away, I see the police officer I hit – she’s got blood all over her and she’s still holding her nose.
At the precinct, another female officer grabs my arm and shoves me so hard into a holding cell that I slam against a wall and hit my head. For a few moments, I lie dazed.
“You think you’re tough, huh?” she says, standing over me.
Behind her is another officer with a smug look on her face.
I say nothing as my pain is all emotional. I’ve just lost my sister – what could possibly hurt more?
“By the time we’re done with you, you’re gonna wish you had never laid a hand on a police officer.”
She grabs my arm, hoists me to my feet and slams me against a bench. I hit the bench then fall to the ground where I lie.
“Now that’s what happens when you resist arrest.” She smiles and leaves the cell.
Alone in my holding cell, I curl up in a corner and squeeze my eyes shut. I want to just die. Close my eyes and never wake up.
But a tiny voice inside me tells me not to, because even though she’s not with me, Angel needs me.
Where did they take her? To an orphanage, where older kids will beat the crap out of her? To a foster home where some pedophile will abuse her? To some horrible family who will starve her and make a slave out of her?
The thought of all that makes me want to vomit.
Erro and Hawk appear, looking distressed, but I say nothing to them. Erro tries to take me in her arms but I shrug her off. I am furious that they weren’t able to help me.
When Erro talks to me, I don’t answer. I’ve stopped talking. Right now, my gift means zilch if I have lost the one person that’s so precious to me. What’s the use of helping others if I couldn’t help my own sister?
If I couldn’t help myself?
A few more female cops mill around my cell.
“Hey you!” an officer hisses. “Do you know that the officer you hit has to have surgery for a broken nose?”
I don’t answer.
“You’re in sooo much trouble now.” She shakes her head and smiles like she knows something I don’t.
I cover my head with my hands and try to sink deeper into the bench I’m sitting on.
Then Farrell appears. “Burn? What the …you? You beat up a police officer? What the hell’s wrong with you, Burn?”
I don’t answer. I just stare at the ground.
He scrambles to read the police report in front of him.
After he does, his frown lines disappear.
He walks into my cell and hands me a can of Coke. I mutter my thanks as I take it, but I don’t open it.
He sits across from me and looks at me. “It’s gonna be okay, Burn,” he says.
“Do you know where they’ve taken her?” I ask, my voice hoarse.
“Somewhere safe and you’ll be able to see her soon. Right now, we need to sort you out. Just cooperate, will you?”
I nod.
Just then Lisa Farrell, the lady whose husband I once busted at the pizzeria, rushes in. She’s also a cop, remember?
“Burn! Are you okay?”
I just look at her as my vision blurs again.
“Oh, you poor baby,” she says and gives me a hug. “This must be terrible for you. I’m really sorry that you have to go through all of this.”
“T…thanks.”
“Farrell’s asked them to go easy on you,” she says as she hands me a batch of Kleenex. “Told them how you helped the detectives the last time.”
I nod my thanks and dab my swollen eyes.
“Can I get you anything, Burn?”
I shake my head.
She stays with me while they process my arrest, squeezing my hand from time to time. I notice a few female cops giving her dirties, but she doesn’t seem to care.
Other officers talk to me and explain stuff like how I’m entitled to a lawyer free of charge as I am underage and stuff. I nod, but I hear nothing – I just zone out. It’s easier this way – my way of coping.
After a while, I lie on the bench and stare at the ceiling.
Hours later, Trojan rocks up with Carlene to pick me up. He gives me a hug, wipes my tears with his palms, has a chat with Lisa, then drives me home.
In the car, none of us speak.
Sitting in the living room is Daisy, Matt, Lanie, Carlene and Bobby, all sporting worried looks.
“Come stay with me,” Trojan whispers. “I’ll take care of you.”
I shake my head. “I have to be here for Angel’s sake.”
“What if you stayed with Sofia, Burn? You’ll be comfortable there. I promise.”
I shake my head. “I need to be here, Trojan. They’re gonna visit again and then maybe…”
He nods, but doesn’t look happy.
I walk to my room and crawl under the covers. Trojan follows me in, sits on the bed and stares at the ground.
After a while, he turns and looks at me. “We can fight this, Burn, but ...”
I look at him. Even if we do, it will take months to get Angel back. I nod slowly.
He swivels to look at me. “I need you to be strong, Burn. I need you to be prepared to fight for her. Whatever it takes, you have to do it. Whatever.”
I nod as fresh tears scald my cheeks.
He reaches over and wipes away my tears. “I’ll walk this with you, okay?” He hugs me to him, messing his shirt with my tears. Right now, he’s what I need – safe, capable arms around me.
All the heartbreak I have ever felt when Brody and I split, all the anguish I felt when Dawn cut me, all the pain I felt when my parents died -- nothing compares to what I am feeling right now.
He lies in bed with me and I burrow deep into him. He covers us both with the sheet. We don’t talk, we just lie in each other’s arms in the dimly lit room until we both fall asleep.
I wake up in the middle of the night and find myself in Trojan’s embrace. I stiffen as I try to figure things out. Memories of Angel’s removal flood me. I shake my head hard to blot out that horrible scene where I lost my sister.
Trojan opens his eyes a little and peers at me. Then he gets out of bed, goes to the kitchen and fetches me a glass of water.
He sits me up and feeds it to me. My throat is parched and I drink up the entire glass of water. I lie down again. “You want me to get you a coffee or something, baby?”
I shake my head and pull him down to me. Like before, I nestle deep into him again. He holds me close and kisses my hair several times. Before long I hear his soft snoring. But I’m wide-awake.
Angel. I look at her empty bed, picture her smiling face, and steel bands of hurt twist around my broken heart.
How do I live without my sister?
I’ve got to get her back.