Eleven
"See you tonight?" Gavin whispers as he leans against my door frame, his left hand laced with mine. I nod, an uneasy feeling settling in my gut.
"Yeah, sure."
His eyes look into mine in a strange, unreadable expression for a long moment before he moves off the frame and gives my forehead a kiss, his mouth gentle along my skin.
"Call me if you need me, okay?"
I nod, knowing I’m far from okay. I watch him walk out the door and get into the backseat of a town car. He must have called a driver to come get him while I was in the bedroom. Hastily, I grab my phone and wallet along with the car keys, needing to get some air before the feelings inside of me smother me.
***
"I miss you, sweetie," Farah whispers when she opens the door to her apartment on Eastern Avenue. She hugs me tightly and leans back, her eyebrows going up when she sees my expression. Ever since Gavin left for his meetings, I’ve had this pit in my stomach. I’ve come to rely on him so much in the last few weeks it terrifies me.
"Aria, is something wrong?" Her soft voice is traced with worry as she pulls me into the entryway and wraps an arm around my shoulder.
"I knew something was up with you at lunch. Did Gavin do something?"
I hastily shake my head, knowing how well they hit it off at lunch today.
"No, he’s wonderful. Actually, I think I’ve fallen for him."
As I say those words, I gasp at how true they are. I long for his touch, the sound of his voice, the way he says my name. I need him. When I’m sad or happy or anything, I always need him.
"Have you told him?"
"Well, no."
"This is good, isn’t it?" Her forehead creases in worry, her bright eyes narrowing.
"I don’t know. I vowed to guard myself, to keep from getting attached, falling in love, and inevitably getting hurt. But Gavin, he just sees right through me. He doesn’t let me hide. He feels so good...God, I’m so confused!"
She takes one of my hands and gives me a small smile.
"Sweetie, it’s okay to let yourself trust him. I saw how he couldn’t keep his eyes off you. He might not realize it yet, but he loves you. It’s written all over his face! Trust me, this isn’t one-sided."
I take a deep breath, hoping she’s right. But how could he love me? My thoughts scatter as Farah pulls me into her and hugs me.
"What should I do?" I should tell him how I feel. I should have told him already.
She sighs, pulling back and giving me a knowing smile, reminding me how lucky I am to have her.
"Just listen to your heart, Ari."
I smile, thanking her as we hug again. My stomach settles and my mind clears. Now I realize that the strange look Gavin gave me this afternoon wasn’t concern or pity, it was bright, filled with care and a safe comfort. Oh my God, it was love.
Suddenly, Jaden bolts into the room, his phone pressed to his ear and his face looking surprisingly stressed. He usually looks so at ease, but now his eyebrows are drawn together and one hand is clenched into his black hair.
"She’s here. Yes. All right. Bye, Chase."
Who’s here? Who’s Chase? My worries disappear and are replaced with confusion.
"Your boyfriend is worried about you. You should really help a guy out, Aria."
Immediately I stand, worry seeping through my veins. Gavin? Why would he be – oh, no! My scalp prickles when I realize I turned off my phone.
"What are you talking about? I just had lunch with him."
He folds his arms over his chest, agitated.
"My brother Chase works for him. He says that Mr. Thomas has been looking like crazy for you.
Did you guys have a fight or something?"
"No..."
Farah walks around me and steps up to Jaden.
"Relax, Jay. It’s all right. She’s here." He nods, his arm going around her as they head into the kitchen, leaving me reeling.
I reach into my pocket, hastily turning on my iPhone. Once my home screen pops up, I dial Gavin’s cell and press it to my ear. I’m bordering between worry and nervousness.
"Aria!" he answers, his voice laced with worry.
"It’s me," I whisper.
"Why did you turn your phone off?" His voice is strung tight.
"It slipped my mind. I was just talking to Farah. Why were you so worried?"
He exhales, obviously at war with something.
"You’re at Farah’s?"
"Yes."
"See you soon. Don’t leave."
"Gavin... I can just meet you at home"
A low chuckle of laughter omits from him and it has no trace of humor in it. He must be really mad, I think to myself.
"Jaden told me where to find you, Aria. I’ll be there in a few minutes."
"Okay."
His voice has such a dominant bite to it that when he hangs up on me, I just stand there staring at my phone screen for a good two minutes. What the hell?
Farah comes back in and takes a hold of my shoulders, lifting my gaze to hers.
"What did he say?"
"He’s on his way. I have no idea what’s going on with him."
She chuckles and pulls me into the kitchen with her.
"Welcome to the world of men and dating, sweetie!"
Once we finish off grilled cheese sandwiches and diet sodas, Farah pulls on her North Face jacket and Jaden leaves to start her Lexus.
"We’re going to go to a movie and let you two have some time. Text me, okay?"
I nod, kissing her cheek and sitting back down at the kitchen island as I hear them pull out of the driveway.
I don’t know how long I sit there, trying to make sense of my feelings. His overprotective nature drives me crazy, but makes my heart race, too. If he didn’t love me, he wouldn’t get so worried, would he?
There are so many things I love about him. His eyes, his crooked smile that makes me weak in the knees, the sound of his voice, and God, his kisses just take my breath away. Could this be right? I just don’t know.
Okay, I do know. But I'm scared.
There’s a soft knock on the front door and when I pull it open, I have to suck in a breath. Gavin’s bright blue-gray eyes gaze down into mine, his forehead creasing as he lets out a breath, looking me up and down for injury, and his hand tentatively coming up to my cheek.
"Are you okay?" he whispers, pulling me into his chest and winding his arms tightly around me. I press my face to his neck and nod, feeling the tension leave his body as I clutch onto his collared shirt.
"Yeah. Why the overreaction, Gavin?"
He pulls away and runs both hands through his tousled hair, stepping into the apartment and pacing the length of the living room a few times. When his eyes finally shift back to mine, they are filled with uncertainty.
"You can’t do that to me, Aria. I couldn’t call or text you, you weren’t at your place. Do you have any idea what time it is?"
I gape up at him, at a loss for words.
"It’s almost six, Aria. I was worried." His voice is filled with anguish and it tears at my heart knowing I caused him to worry. As quickly as I can, I go to him, cup his cheeks in my hands and gaze up into the wide pools of emotion that are his eyes. My breath catches, seeing concern and possibly love in his eyes.
"I’m sorry I worried you. Why were you so worried, though? It’s not like we’ve been seeing each other for a long time." That last part just slips out. Crap.
His eyes harden at my last statement and abruptly he pulls away from me.
"I’ve been having one of my security guards detail Bryce Williams and he was seen in the Downtown South End. I thought, Christ, Aria. I was afraid he got to you!"
Bryce? Security detail? Oh, God. It feels like the bottom of my world drops away in those long seconds when I hear his name. I can’t move. I can’t breathe. I clutch onto the island behind me and gasp for air as the memories come back full force. His dark eyes. His grip on my chin when he got angry. The cold look in his eyes that last night when he took everything I’d had left to give.
"Wait, how did you know his last name?" I say in a broken voice.
"The police reports are a matter of public record, Aria. I had to protect you. This is the only way I know how." He's pacing and wearing a hole in Farah's kitchen floor.
"B-Bryce? He was...Oh, my God." The breath whooshes out of me and suddenly I feel lightheaded.
I begin to fall to the floor.
Gavin’s intense eyes widen and he catches me in strong, sure arms. My body shakes with a cold shiver as his arms cradle me against his chest, kissing my forehead gently. His warmth spreads through the cold, replacing darkness with white-hot light.
"Shh, it’s okay. You’re safe, beautiful." His soft voice is the only thing I can focus on.
I shake my head. I’m so angry with myself for my carelessness. I gaze into Gavin’s deep eyes, my heart stuttering when I see his fierce look, as if he’d step in front of a bullet to keep me safe. I know he would. I feel my heart break open, letting in the light and shining the truth that I’ve refused to admit until now. I love him. I love him. I can’t lie to myself anymore. I'm in love with this man. My Gavin.
"I’m so sorry, Gavin. Please don’t let me go," I whisper, my voice heavy with fear as he scoops me into his arms and settles me on the love seat before kneeling in front of me. He grasps my hands tightly in his and his stormy blue eyes capture mine.
"I love you, beautiful. I won’t let you go."
***
I gasp for precious air, losing my voice as those three words replay in my mind over and over again. I love you. I love you, beautiful.
As the wheels start turning in my head again, my heart speeds up. It all starts to make sense. The look in his eyes, his gentle touch, his protectiveness. He can’t stay away from me. Oh, my God, he loves me. And I fell for him that first day he called me beautiful.
"Aria, are you okay?" Gavin asks, his hands linked with mine across my thighs and his blue-gray eyes locked on mine. They swim with everything I haven't allowed myself to see until this very moment.
God, I’m so much in love with him.
"Could you say that again?" I whisper shakily. He slowly smiles, one of his hands cradling my cheek, his eyes blazing with such sincerity.
"I love you. I’m so in love with you. Ever since I saw you dance at the studio and your gorgeous green eyes looked into mine, I was gone, baby."
My heart stutters as those words seep through me. Then I realize that he isn’t alone in this. I’ve been drawn to him since the very first time I laid eyes on him, only four weeks ago. I love him.
"You love me? You’re not just saying this because of the situation with Bryce?"
Gavin shakes his head incredulously, taking my head in his hands gently. His eyes are filled with adoration, worry, concern, and the softness I've come to yearn for. Love.
"I. Love. You. Baby. I’ve never been surer of anything in my entire life."
I gaze up at him, seeing the sincerity and love in his deep blue eyes. Then I grasp his hands that hold my head and feel the moisture in my eyes. His admission seems to banish all of the doubts and insecurities I’ve been feeling in the past few days. He loves me, all of me. I’d had no idea.
"God, I love you, Gavin. I love you so much."
The words tumble out of me, my heart yearning for this man as he exhales, his eyes brighter now.
He shakes his head once in disbelief before pulling me onto his lap, wrapping one arm around my waist and tangling a hand in my unruly hair.
"Say that again, Aria."
I laugh a little, never taking my eyes off his.
"I love you." The words are wrenched from the deepest part of me. Then his mouth covers mine.
He presses those lips urgently to mine, parting them to him and holding me. One of his hands caresses my cheek. I moan low at the back of my throat as I let go and give my heart to him, knowing he'll forever be the man I love more than anything in this world.
I wrap my arms around his back and lick into his mouth, needing more of him.
"Jesus Christ, Aria," he whispers against my lips as he sucks on my bottom lip, drawing another moan from my mouth.
"Take me to your place, Gavin."
He groans and attacks my neck with soft and passionate kisses.
"I’d love to, but we really need to talk about this. What happened with…?"
I put my hand over his mouth, stopping him, and shake my head.
"We will, I promise. But right now I need you to take me back to your place and make love to me on every surface in your penthouse. Can you do that?"
He chuckles, pulling away from me and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.
"Yes, ma'am."
He helps me up and wraps an arm around my shoulders as we head out of the house.
***
My mouth never leaves Gavin’s as he pulls me into his apartment only ten minutes later. He closes the door behind us, pressing me up against it. I wrap my arms around his neck and hitch my legs around his hips, moaning when he softly bites down on my lower lip. He then slips his hand under my shirt, touching my bare back and groaning when he comes in contact with the lacy fabric of my Victoria's Secret bra.
He pulls off my shirt and gazes down at me with blazing blue eyes.
"I want you so much."
I smile, my blood heating in anticipation.
"I want you, Gavin."
Without another word, he sweeps me into his arms and carries me to his bedroom. He flicks on the lights and sets me on the edge of the comforter.
He steps back and slowly peels off his suit jacket, takes off his shoes, and undoes his navy blue tie.
He steps closer to me and I hastily kneel on the bed, undoing one button at a time on his black dress shirt.
"You’re so beautiful, Aria," Gavin whispers, kissing my neck and covering my body with his once his shirt and dress pants are removed. He kisses me hungrily as he slides my jeans down my legs and leans back to look deep in my eyes.
"I was so worried today. I can’t even think about something bad happening to you again, baby. I need you." The vulnerability in his voice is my undoing as I kiss his chest and neck, not wanting to think about what he must have gone through today.
"I’m so sorry, I had no idea, Gavin."
He kisses my forehead, his fingers threading through my hair.
"I know. I’m not blaming you."
I tighten my arms around his shoulders and kiss his jaw eagerly.
"I need you, too, Gavin. Now that I’ve had you, I know I’d be lost without you."
He kisses my lips softly and leans his forehead against mine for a moment.
"I’m going to make love to you now, my beautiful."
My heart stutters as I open my legs to him, desire pooling in my core as I feel him at my entrance.
"Yes..."
In every caress, every kiss, every softly murmured sweet nothing he shows me just how much he loves me. And I’m lost to him.