CHAPTER 19
"Morning," I answer crisply, watching Liam descending the stairs gaily. He's wearing a black fitted sweatshirt, his hands inside the pockets of his grey joggers.
And my heart flips, as always. Such a foolish I am.
"Are you okay?" he asks, and I cynically huff a small laugh. He squints hard at the sound of it, probably wondering why I'm grumpy so early in the morning.
"I'm good," I reply and move my feet to wherever I was going, my rotten mood unchanged.
"Wait." Liam grabs my wrist deftly. His touch takes my breath away. "Are you angry at me?" he asks, a frown on his face.
I slowly turn around to face him. His eyes are earnest. "Do I have any right to be?" I question while pulling my hand out of his.
His lips harden in bemusement. "What is the matter wit—“
"Oh, I nearly forgot; your mother said she had to leave early," I tell him while rubbing the bridge between my eyes, cutting him off.
He scowls my foul mood the sole reason. "About yesterday," he starts, ignoring Eleanor's message. "I just had to go with Samantha because I got the call when we—“
"You're not obligated to explain a thing to me, Mr. Darcy!" I utter strenuously, anger laced in my voice as I resume my journey to the kitchen.
"But I want to," Liam barks softly, just enough for me to hear. He's tailing me, and I just keep walking. "Listen, we can avoid this nonsense if—“
"If we tell her everything?" I finish it for him sharply, standing by the kitchen door. "Do you think it's that easy for me?" I can already feel the threatening tears brimming in my eyes.
No crying, bitch! My subconscious insists sternly. I take deep breath.
"Listen." Liam seizes my face with his palms, and sounds very desperate that I stay put. "I feel like I've known you forever, Ms. Jones. Near, far, you and I are meant to be," he whispers in my ear, and I swallow hard. "It's crazy but I can feel it."
Yes, I know the feeling. And it's a very stupid feeling considering that we've known each other for just . . . a week maybe?
This is bullshit!
"But this is wrong! I can't just go on with this, and disregard her. We shouldn't have started this. I'm calling it off!" I turn around to enter the kitchen, only to bump into Julian holding a big-fat sandwich.
I sigh heavily at the sight of his astounded eyebrows. "Hi," he utters mouthful. "Sir . . . Liam?" he now greets his boss.
"Just go ahead with your agenda, Julian," Liam tells him dismissively.
Watching the crazy boy, I really feel like laughing. "Hi, Julian, have a nice day," I say when he walks past me.
"Okay." He nods.
"And you, too, Mr. Darcy. Just go on with your agenda and—“ I don't finish my sentence as I hear the kitchen door slamming shut, and in a few seconds I'm into Liam's arms right behind it. "What the—“
"Stop thinking of negativity, Kira," Liam snaps again, making me breathe softly in a flustered manner. I can’t get used to my name from his mouth; it’s very arresting. "I won't give up on us so easily, and don't ask me to go away."
"But—“
"I was only thinking of you," Liam cuts me short, playing with the strands of my curls. "No matter how much your friend kept talking and talking; only you occupied my mind because I could not think straight imagining what you’d be thinking. I’m sorry.” He sighs, fear clouding his face.
Jesus! Why is he doing this?
"Listen, somebody may come here, so let's—“ I don't get to finish. Liam shuts me up by kissing these very same lips that were about to speak a second ago.
Oh God! Why can't I resist him? Damn it, why am I such an easy prey of his? I hold my breath, feeling his lips coaxing mine possessively, demandingly, igniting the smoldering fire in me.
He's my weakness. We kiss so hard, my arms around his neck, and his about my waist, holding me tight. His kiss is rough, yet soft, simply beguiling.
You're in the kitchen, woman! My subconscious yells warningly, and the devil in me is busy amplifying my sex goddess.
Just great!
And since when did my life become a soap opera? Kissing the male lead in secrecy? I'm sure anyone can appear at any time and it'll be a disaster. I pull back abruptly, panting heavily.
"My God, you're driving me crazy, and I don't know how to deal with your impertinence," Liam says once we go an inch or two apart. "I want you near me all the time, so what do I do?" he huskily asks.
"I don't know," I breathe. "Sam will be here soon, let me go." I pull out of his brace.
"Okay," he relents, and I'm slowly out of his hands, heading straight outside where the cold air slaps my face.
I have to go back to Los Angeles and forget everything. The dream is over, Kira, we need to get back to reality; I can now hear my subconscious perfectly clear. I snuff the unbidden tears away, catching a long breath. She is right.
"I need to leave," I murmur while pacing hence and forth in the porch, nibbling my fingers in a fright. My body is hot and cold, the feeling unfathomable.
That kiss . . . damn that kiss!
Liam stirs me up. He destroys any resolution I make as long as it doesn't include him. He's someone I need to run away from yet the magnetism between us is exceedingly powerful. Fuck! I ruffle my hair messily, shutting my eyes as I lean on the railing.
Out of the blue, a familiar voice of the roaring engine swaps my subconscious into reality and my eyes open immediately. Malik is back. I can't help but smile at the sight of his infamous Chopper 64 as it majestically lands at its usual place.
I straighten up when the prince himself drops off the ground with a small duffel bag in hand. Today he's exclusively dressed in white cropped pants and a blue jacket that matches his shoes. He looks handsome and majestic, nearing the porch.
"Told you I'd be back sooner than you can imagine, didn't I, Professor?" He beams, standing before me.
"You surely did," I reply weakly, accepting his friendly hug. "How was your trip?" We exchange a short greeting. It looks like all is well, and welcome mischief.
"Are they in?" Malik asks about the others.
"Well, Eleanor has left a while ago, Sam is inside, and Liam—“
"He's here," Sam's sassy voice shoots, and when I turn back, I see the two of them together.
"Here they are." A sharp breath escapes my lungs when Liam's blue eyes pierce on mine, his look impassive.
"Hi, Malik. Are you good?" Sam smiles radiantly.
"Very good, and I see everyone is doing great," Malik replies. "What's up, brother?" He moves towards Liam, and they share a quick manly hug.
They decide to return inside for breakfast. Alone as I've been earlier, I stay at the porch, busying my mind with countless thoughts. I feel like bursting, like practically burst and fall into pieces. I need to leave; it's my only salvation from this temptation.
Despite my dismay, I let out a faint smile when Malik joins me with his latest golden iPhone in his hand. He stands in the same posture as mine, facing the front yard with elbows on the railing. I need to go; maybe he can help me escape, at least for a while.
"Malik," I utter recklessly.
"Professor." He faces me, a little startled.
"Can I use your helicopter?" I ask without flinching.
"The chopper?" he queries, surprised, and I nod my head.
"Actually I'd like to see Big Sky. I've heard marvelous stuff about the place," I say dreamingly, my thoughts on the splendid things I've heard about the place. "Can we go together?" I give him a hopeful look as it’s my last card for escape.
Without a word, Malik quickly taps on his phone and connected into a call right away.
"Cyrus, fifteen minutes to finish that thing. We're flying to Big Sky." I hear him saying in a menacing voice that I never knew existed within him. I bite my lip in a stun. "Done, anything else?" He grins.
Wow! My subconscious jumps gleefully.
"No, I'll go change." I smile in awe.
I quickly change into a white max dress that's perfect for a lovely summer date. Except that I'm not going on a date. With my curls tied up, and brown sunglasses, I'm so good to go.
My self-confidence is all that I need right now to beat my demons before they make me feel undeserving of good things in life.
"Long dresses are also beautiful on you, huh?" Malik comments when I step outside, his mien playful as always.
What a tease.
"Is that supposed to be a compliment, Malik?" I laugh with a clear joy, and so does he with a slight shrug. "If it is, then thank you. I'm ready."
Malik gives Liam a call to inform him about our little escape, and I choose to stay oblivious of their conversation as we near the helicopter. Cyrus, the pilot, regards me with a simple hello, and I answer as given.
"Ready?" Malik asks him after ending the call.
"Yes, sir," Cyrus replies.
Malik gives me a hand climbing in, and I grab it so naturally. I sit at the back, by myself, and he sits at the front. The seats are comfortable and it's spacious enough for me to see outside without troubles.
Minutes pass by as Cyrus sets his mechanics. He puts on the enormous headset . . . we all do. He sets other things I don't even know and I start hearing the whirring sound that sets my being alive.
It's my first time riding this thing but I like it already.
The air blown around is so exhilarating; makes me feel problem free.
I exchange smiles with Malik, and he raises his eyebrow pointedly to my excitement. Slowly we hit the sapphire blue sky, leaving the Darcy's vicinity. I can't explain the rush of adrenaline as we fly high.
Something like a park with animals running around streams into view, widening my grin.
"Is this the Yellowstone National Park?" I shout out to be heard by Malik.
"Yeah, Professor," he answers loudly. "Should I push you off?" he adds, together with his diabolic laugh.
"Not funny, Malik! Not funny at all!" I retort, and it makes him laugh even louder, together with Cyrus.
Apparently this is the first national park in America; so I'm kind of elated to finally see it even from above. I see a group of American Bison running around. The chopper heads south, and we meander down the Gelatin Canyon; it immediately puts my camera into a better use.
After flying by for a while, we finally approach the famous Big Sky County. It is way beautiful than I imagined. It's like something from an old book, its architecture old and vintage. The snow covers most of its landscapes, giving me a little taste of winter amid the summer.
I simply love nature.
"And here is the Big Sky, baby!" Malik shouts like a maniac. We all laugh in unison. It seems I'm not the crazy one about this amazing county.
"Yeah, it's exquisite!" I shout as Cyrus lowers the chopper slowly.
"Now wait until I show you what's best about this place," Malik brags.
"I can't wait, Malik," I reply.
We spend some time at the resort for a local luncheon, after a little walk around all of Malik's favorite places. I can't say that they haven't turned into mine as well. I mean, almost everything about this place in enchanting.
I still don't understand why Americans disregard the Montana State. I think it's a little heaven on Earth.
Seated comfortably, eating and drinking, Malik starts his unexpected inquiries. "Will you tell me what's wrong with you now?" He narrows his eyes at me, and my smile fades instantly.
I feel alarmed at him look of apprehension.
"There's nothing wrong. Why? Do I look in trouble?" I try to cheer up, but my companion is far from being stupid.
He knows!
"Aren't you running away right now?" Malik asks, and he's damn right. "Come on, Kira, I know you like Liam, so then what's stopping you both from--"
"I don't know what you're talking about," I immediately cut him short and glance away.
Damn, are we that indiscreet? How did he find out? From Liam?
"Don't worry a thing, Professor, your secret is safe with me," Malik utters after a short while tells me, impelling me to look back at him.
"You're crazy." I smile evasively.
Malik reclines back in his chair, his lips stretched into a soft smile. "It's the first time I'm seeing Liam so engrossed into romance," he proceeds, sounding sincere.
"I'm very positive that's not true," I remark while drinking my sangria.
Like seriously? First time? I don't buy it.
"Well, Liam is one of the people who don't know how to beat around the bushes." Malik's gaze is too earnest that I feel condescended, talking to an uncle. "If he shows even a slight interest on something then it means he's indeed serious about it."
Why is he telling me this?
"So, you mean he's never been serious with a woman before?"
Malik seems amused, chuckling. "I didn't say that, goodness!" he comments. I arch my brows inquisitively. He clears his throat and adds, "Let's say . . . he's indeed serious with you. Maybe more than I've ever seen him before."
I'd be lying if I deny the fireworks in my heart right now.
"Why? Did he go through some rough patch as far as romance is concerned?" I ask.
"Professor—“ Malik leans over the table, as he's seated across from me, “—if you're that curious about his story then it means you are interested in him," he says coolly.
"Huh?" I gasp, somewhat busted.
"See?" Malik shoots me a scandalized index, back to the typical playboy. Jeez! "I was so damn right! When did you fall for him? How? And why?"
"Malik!" I groan, and he laughs even harder. "You've got it all wrong." My eyes betray my words.
"Okay, I'll pretend I believe you." He sips his own drink, and I tuck my lip between my teeth. "In my opinion, you like him, and he likes you."
"Just drink your Sangria." I pour him another one.
"Sure." He rolls his big eyes.
"But we can't always get what we want," I think out loud, sighing. "That would be too selfish, right?"
"I don't know," Malik replies coolly, sipping his drink. "But everyone deserves to be happy."
I know that.
"And what if it comes with a high price? What if someone has to be hurt for another to be happy?" I fix my eyes on the glass I'm holding, tilting it to the sides, Malik's intense gaze on me.
"Would you rather sacrifice your own happiness so that another won't get hurt?" he asks casually, and my heart tightens. "Is that what's happening to you?" He now sounds serious.
Maybe? Well, it doesn't matter.
"No." I face him with a smile. "But if it happens, perhaps I'll sacrifice mine. Stupid, isn't it?"
"Depends on your reasons; it can be stupid, but it can also be noble," Malik answers. "Oh, but I'm not a great believer of nobility," he adds, and we both laugh.
Going back to what he'd just said, about Liam and romance, I think I kind of understand Malik's point. I don't know what Liam’s predicament is, but mine is just my unsettling past events.
The fear of not being good enough is what created my little bubble.
Or maybe the right person hasn't shown up yet. Deep inside I always knew that there'd be someone who can see through me and accept whatever the wreck I am, and maybe then I'll be able to open up.