Ch9
I was angry, upset, and very sad. My emotions ran wild. What Nancy said devastated me. My head was mess, and I wished everything would just stop. When I was sitting on the curb, a bearded man came to me and thrust a knife in my face.
"Hey, old man. I don't want to hurt you, so just give me your wallet and walk away."
I could have just given it away, but I stood up and threw a punch at him. I was not thinking right. I could have died, but at that moment death didn’t seem so bad.
My head was bruised, and my arm was bleeding. After I knocked him down, I finally realized that I tried to fight a criminal. I glared at him. I could not see him well since my glasses had flown to the other side of the street with his punch. He was looking at me. He smiled light and said to me.
"You are in love aren’t you? You are a funny old man."
-R-
This is not right. Robert closed the internet article. He was reading the article about how Al Pacino married Lucila Sola. The title of the article was '12 Hollywood Couples with Large Age Gaps.' There were so many people who were happy and together despite the generational barrier. He hated that he was reading this kind of article. He began to get paranoid and checked around to make sure no one was watching. He sighed and went to the restroom to wash up his face. I am insane. I need to move some place far, far away!
It had been days, but he was still thinking about Sara. He leaned back into his chair. It seemed like time was going faster than before. Recently, he found himself looking at Sara's house when he went to kitchen, walking around it when he went to check the mail, and driving slowly as he passed it going to his garage. He felt guilty about all of this, but he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t even throw away the flier with Sarah’s picture on it. Sara’s smile in the picture made him happy. I am a stalker. I need to stop this now. I need to move as soon as possible. It seemed like a good idea to him. He didn’t have anything tying him to the house. He started looking through apartment listings.
When he was working later that day, his cell phone started ringing. It was Nancy. He was hesitant to answer, and the phone stopped ringing. He sighed and started working again. However, after around 20 minutes, his phone started ringing again. This time it was John.
"Yes," Robert answered.
"Dad. I am sorry about the other day. Do you have a minute?"
"Alright. I will just talk to your mother."
"Oh, ok. Thanks."
Robert thought that he had to meet Nancy. He was about to call her, but he decided to text her instead. Nancy texted him back. She said she wanted to meet him first. He said he would.
"How have you been, Robert?" Dr. Albert asked.
"It's the same, and yourself?" Robert answered and Dr. Albert seemed very surprised.
"I've been doing so well! Is something different? You look happier.”
"I really don't understand why people kept saying that to me."
"You have changed. You are smiling." Robert checked touched his face. Dr. Albert continued. "And you even asked me how I am doing. This is great! You just made my day."
Robert did not know how to react to that.
"How did you like the apple..."
"It, it was good, very good," Robert answered. Dr. Albert didn’t even have to finish his question.
"Really? I was a little bit worried because towards the end there was that accident."
"Oh, you mean the murder?"
"Yes, actually it would be better if we didn’t discuss it."
"Did the police arrest him?"
"No, they didn't. He is still running."
"Why did he kill his wife?"
"Well," Dr. Albert was hesitant a little bit and kept talking. "His wife was cheating on him with his assistant. When he found out he got really mad and - you know."
That reminded Robert of when he found out about Nancy and Gary. Dr. Albert laughed nervously and changed the subject right away. "I see the results of your survey. It looks pretty good. So what happened? I would like to know about your week."
Robert wanted to talk about Sara. He saw Dr. Albert. He seemed very excited about his patient's progress. Robert could not tell him about Sara. I’m moving to another town anyway. I'll be fine.
"John called."
"He did? That's great! What did he say?" I guess he remembers John. Robert was grateful that he didn’t have to explain the relationship to him.
"He...um… asked me how was I doing and we talked a little bit." Robert lied for the rest of his session.
Robert got in his car after the session and sighed. Maybe next time if this does not get any better, I will tell him. He started driving. He thought something was wrong and after he stopped the car he knew why. "Oh my gosh... Why did I come here?" He came to the Walmart without thinking. He knew the reason why. Well. Maybe I could buy something. He went to the store and walked around. He started putting apples in a bag. He remembered that he still had apples at home, but he did not care. He thought about buying some beer, but he realized that he did not need as much as before. He still had plenty of alcohol. He scratched his head and put in a carton of eggs. When he turned around, he saw a girl with long dark brown hair walking away. Robert pulled up his glasses. It's her! Robert's pulse raced. The girl turned the corner. Robert turned into the next aisle with her. I am crazy. I know. I've gone mad. I will move next week, or this weekend, but please, I want to see her one last time! The girl was looking at the spaghetti noodles. He slowly approached her. She put her head up and looked at him. It was not Sara. It was just someone who looked like her from behind. She walked by Robert and Robert scoffed at himself for being so foolish.
The next day, he parked his car in the underground parking lot of a department store. He checked the time; it was 5:15 p.m. He felt conflicted. He did not want to see Nancy. He still felt betrayed, and his heart was filled with hatred toward her. He did not know that his hatred was eating himself from the inside. He blamed her for his broken life. He knew that was not right, but he needed someone to blame. When he came up to the 1st floor, he started hearing music coming from the stores. It had been a very long time since he went downtown. Soon, he found the cafe 'Blue Moon.' It was a pretty fancy looking cafe that was centered in downtown. It seemed liked a place that Nancy would like.
Somethings never change. Since its location was so central, there were many people inside. Robert wanted to go back. He still did not want to help her. Why am I doing this? Just to feel comfortable? Is it because John asked me? Is it so my children will hate me less? I hadn't seen them for a long time. They don't even like me... However, it was true that he still felt sorry for his children. I should've met John not her.
He opened the door. It smelled like fruit inside and soft piano music was playing. Even though it was not the smell of an apple, it still reminded him of Sara. I am a mess... Robert sighed. He looked around. He was 5 minutes late, and Nancy was waiting for him. He saw Nancy sitting next to the window. When she saw him, she put up her hand to him. She was wearing a black suit and she had short hair. There was some white, but her hair was well treated. She was wearing makeup to hide her wrinkles and her red lipstick and fancy earring were noticeable.
Robert walked to her. She was looking at him walking to her, and he turned his head away. Robert sat down slowly. There was an empty tea cup and a book on the table. She must have come early and waited.
"How have you been?" Nancy asked.
Robert massaged his forehead and answered. "How much do you need?"
Nancy looked at Robert's face, but Robert couldn’t look at her.
"I’ve been well thanks," Nancy retorted.
Robert looked at Nancy, and then quickly looked down at the table. "How much do you want?" he asked again.
The waitress came to their table. "Would you like to order?"
"No," Robert said shortly. For a while, Robert and Nancy were just sitting there, silent. Nancy spoke first. "Do you have to treat me like this?"
"Just tell me what you want." Robert was not sure how much she would ask for, but he knew it was why she wanted to meet him.
"Ok..." Nancy said slowly. "I need $800,000." Robert smirked because he knew that amount was ridiculous.
"You are insane, and I thought I was the only one." Robert said.
"I am not joking, Robert" Nancy said. Robert banged the table with his fist and shouted.
"Do you think I am joking?" People looked at them.
"Don't make a scene here," Nancy said and Robert was mad.
"You are crazy." Now he was starting to get mad at John, too. Nancy sighed.
"Ok. You need to listen to me."
"Listen to you? I don't even have that kind of money. Do you expect me to give up everything I have for a family that hasn’t called me since we signed the divorce papers? I don’t owe you anything." Robert glared at Nancy. The truth was, he had the money. He was just saving it to go and live on the beach after he retired. It was the one thing that he wanted to do in his life. Who do you think you are? You've taken my life, my children, and now my money? Robert was furious.
"Robert, you have to listen to me..." Robert stood up and started to leave.
"Ask your husband."
"I am not done yet."
"Don't ever call me again."
When Robert was about to walk out the door, Nancy grabbed his arm. "Hannah. It's because of Hannah."
Robert stopped moving when he heard his daughter's name. "Wha...what?"
"Sit down."
Robert sat down.
"She is sick. It's been years."
"What? Are you lying because I won’t give you the money?" Nancy looked at him seriously.
"Robert. Why would I need that much money?" Robert did not say anything. Nancy continued.
"She had surgery a couple times already."
"W...what does she have?"
"She found out she had cancer, but then discovered that she was pregnant as well. She could’ve gotten an abortion and started treatment immediately, but she decided to postpone treatment and keep the child." Robert started to feel bad for his daughter and guilty that he was just finding out about this now.
"After she gave a birth to Irene, she had a complication. We did not know why, but she had been helped by Nelson's company's insurance, but he lost his job over two years ago. I know, it sounds crazy, but we had to pay everything for them." Robert had never met Nelson, because Hannah did not invite Robert to her wedding.
"I'm sorry for not telling you anything, but Hannah never wanted you to know. She didn’t want to ask you for help; she was sorry for the way she treated you." Even though Nancy said 'Hannah was sorry,' Robert did not believe her.
"I guess she still doesn't like me." Robert remembered the times when Hannah rejected meeting Robert when he tried to reach her.
"Robert. We have a lot of debt, and still need to pay Neal’s. She would never come to you for help, so I came." Robert did not say anything for a while. Piano music in the cafe took him to the past. He remembered when Hannah was a baby, and when she was a girl. There was a time when she loved Robert. Ran to his arms, and gave him a hug, kissed his cheeks, but that was it. However, he did not have a lot of those memories.
"I know you are angry, but put it all on me. Don't be mad at the children." Nancy was wrong. He was not angry, but sad. His heart was aching.
"If you had tried to talk to her, or maybe paid attention to her, she might have relied on you." Robert was staring at the table. He wanted to say that he had tried and that Hannah hadn’t responded, but he decided not to.
"Please help her; Irene needs her mother. She is only 7.”
Robert took the check out from his jacket pocket and started writing. He slid the check to Nancy.
"You can get it in three days."
He stood up and left the store in a hurry because he did not want to show Nancy his tears. Nancy tried to say something but he did not hear her.
This is the worst day. I hate everything. I hate my life! Robert came back to the underground parking lot and sat down in the corner. Tears fell down his cheeks. He took off his glasses and wiped his face. She hated me so much that she would rather die than talk to me? I am worse than nothing to her. I can't even be a stranger to her. While he was thinking that, he was still wondering how Hannah was doing. He wanted to know more details and he worried about her. After a while, he calmed him down a little bit. Sara came to his mind. He wished he could hear her voice. He was dumbfounded at himself and laughed. He did not know what to do. After he gave his money to Nancy, he would not be able to buy a house on the beach. His last hope was gone. "I... I really can't have anything..." He said to himself with a squeaky voice. At that moment, he heard something moving in front of him. He put his glasses on and saw a guy that was a little bit shorter than Robert. He was wearing a hat that concealed his face and had a beard with dark skin. He was holding a small knife to Robert.
"Hey, old man. I don't want to hurt you, so just give me your wallet and walk away." the guy said in a deep voice. Robert was standing slowly, thinking, How could this possibly get any worse? He wanted to die. If something happened to me, my money would go to my children. Robert slowly handed over his wallet and walked toward the guy looking down at the ground. When he was close enough, he dropped his wallet and grabbed the guy’s knife, holding his arm with his left hand, and punched the guy’s face with his right arm. The man made a noise and stepped back. He swung the knife and it cut Robert’s left arm.
“You freaking old man!” The man yelled at Robert and started fighting back. While Robert was fighting him, he realized he could really die right there. It was not a suicide, so Neal would understand. He pictured his funeral. There was nobody. But at least Nancy would feel guilty. Robert ran out of breath and stopped moving. He was gasping. The man pushed Robert roughly, and he bumped the car behind him.
“Crazy old man!” The man tried to strangle Robert. When Robert was choking, he automatically pictured Sara’s face. Robert pulled all his strength and pushed the man’s arm and crashed his head into the man’s head. The man fell down with a painful noise making Robert gasp. The guy started screaming and yelling,
“Freak. All I needed was just a little bit of money! I told you, I didn’t want to hurt you!”
Robert was coughing. He saw his glasses on the ground. When saw his left arm bleeding, he realized how stupid he was to fight the robber. What should I do now? The man was slowly standing up, and he grabbed Robert’s wallet. He took out cash and threw it in front of Robert.
“We could’ve done this earlier,” the man said.
“Shut up, you scumbag.” Robert was angry.
“Whatever.” The man wiped his bleeding nose. Robert was glaring at him. In fact, he did not have any energy left in his body. The man looked at Robert and laughed. He slowly said, "You are in love? You are a funny old man."
Robert was shocked by what he heard.
“Wh…What?”
“She is a much younger than you, huh? Don’t worry. You are not the first pervert I met.”
What is he talking about? How did he know? Robert was confused.
“Actually, you are sincere. Interesting.”
“You…” Robert tried to remember something. He was sure that he saw the guy before.
“Don’t be surprised. It is easy to read a person like you.”
“I know you! You are that psychic guy on T.V!”
“Shoot.” He turned his head.
“Just let me go. I will pay your money back someday. I promise.”
The psychic was walking backwards and slowly distanced himself from Robert.
“Wait.”
The psychic stopped.
“How, how did you do that?”
“What? Reading your mind?”
Robert slowly nodded. Ironically, no one knew Robert’s concern and he could not tell anybody, but yet this strange murderer knew everything about him. He thought it was a ridiculous idea, but he wanted to talk to him. The psychic grinned.
“You are really serious, huh? Hm… I don’t think you are just dirty old man.” Robert did not say anything.
“So… what do you want?” the psychic said.
“I…never trust anything like this.” Robert told him quietly.
The psychic laughed. “There are a lot of things that you would not understand or believe.”
“So…you…really can read peoples’ minds?”
“You just saw it.”
“I mean… can you also…solve the problems?”
“Well. I sure can…but.” He stopped speaking and looked at Robert’s eyes.
“What....” When Robert tried to say something, the psychic stopped him.
“I got it. You are losing your mind because of her. I see. You are also a very poor lonely soul.”
Robert was surprised again. The psychic laughed again and said, “So you want to be my client?”
“I…just need some help.”
“I can, definitely; but I need some reward out of it.” Robert heard people walking from behind.
“Let’s change the location.”
The psychic noticed Robert eyeing his knife.
“Oh, this?” He dropped the knife and kicked it to the corner.
“Don’t worry. I don’t harm my clients. Let’s go to your car. Where is it?”
Robert was dumbfounded and he was not sure what he was doing. He picked up his glasses and walked to his car with the murderer.
“So, you want me to help you…” The psychic said while relaxing in the front seat. Robert did not say anything.
“What do you want? Do you want her? Do you want some dirty stuff? Do you want to steal her heart? Just tell me. Let’s be honest with each other.”
Robert was embarrassed. “No, no. I don’t want those. I just…. I just want to forget everything about her.” Robert looked down.
“What? Why?” The psychic asked.
“Look. My life is… over and I know that nothing could ever happen, and I… would never hurt her. There is nothing I can do. I just need to forget. It is just painful to think about her.”
As soon as the psychic heard Robert, he started laughing. His deep voice echoed in Robert’s head. “I’ve never seen a person like you. You just want to forget?”
Robert slowly nodded. What am I doing with this murder suspect? I am telling him something I would never even tell Neal, but he knew stuff. How? How did he know? What if the magic really did exist? He covered his bleeding arm with tissue. He started feeling pain as his adrenaline went down.
“What is your name, by the way?” The psychic asked.
“Robert.”
“Ok, Robert. I am Boldo. If you didn’t know. Anyway, I can do that. It is easy. Look.”
He showed his right palm to Robert. “There is a magic. It is real.” Boldo drew a circle with his left index finger on his right palm. It started bright, and turned to a small fire and disappeared quickly. Boldo exhaled roughly. He seemed very tired.
“Is that some kind of trick?” Robert asked.
“I just told you; it’s a magic. I will show you a different one.” He searched Robert’s car, and found a business card.
“What color is this?”
“It’s blue.”
“Really?” Robert looked into Boldo’s eyes, and saw the card again. It was white.
“How did you do it?” Boldo flicked his finger and the business card turned to blue again.
“This is a kind of hypnosis. Can you believe it now?”
Robert thought this would be some kind of trick.
“Ok, look at me,” Boldo told Robert.
“I don’t know if I want to…”
“If you don’t do this, I can’t help you.”
Robert saw Boldo’s eyes. He had very dark pupils that Robert had never seen before.
“You are regretting coming outside today. You met someone you really don’t like. It’s…your wife. Divorced wife and your daughter…”
Robert suddenly turned his head and asked, “How did you know?”
“It is really hard but possible to read people’s minds. Can you believe it now?”
“I guess, yes.” Robert remembered watching Boldo on television. He thought he was a scam.
“Let’s continue the consulting. So, it is not hard to erase the memory of her…but aren’t you in love with her?”
Robert did not know how to react. He felt embarrassed. Boldo continued speaking.
“I can make her in love with you.”
Robert pictured Sara. Boldo’s words were sweet like the devil’s temptation. Robert slowly replied.
“No, I don’t want that. It’s not fair. I just…need to stop… stop thinking about her.”
“Alright. If that’s what you want. Will you not regret this?”
Not regret this? What other choice do I have? I want to see her. I miss her. I want to talk to her, but it’s not right… Robert could not say anything. Sara may be the first person that he was truly in love with.
“I won’t…regre…t” When Robert slowly answer, Boldo started laughing again.
“How do you think I became so popular and famous?” Boldo asked Robert.
“I don’t know.”
“I fulfill their desires.” Boldo kept chuckling. Robert realized Boldo was looking at his eyes.
“What. Do. You. Really. Want? I am capable of everything. I have to tell you. I am not a good person. I helped in kidnapping, robbing banks, smuggling; I never killed anyone for money, but I could. How many people out there can really do magic? Actually, mine is not magic. It is more like voodoo, so, what do you want? I can do anything for you.”
Robert’s left arm was hurt, but it was not important.
“I…” Robert tried to think what to say. Boldo intercepted his thoughts.
“Do you want to sleep with her?”
“No!” Robert said.
“Do you want her to like you?”
“No. I mean, well. Yes, but no. I want. What I really want is.”
Robert exhaled and said, “I want to talk to her.”
Boldo seemed confused.
“You never talked to her? Is she a mute?”
“No, she is not.” At that moment, he had an epiphany. “That, thing that you just did.”
“What thing? Fire? “
“No, how you changed the color of the card… can you do it to a human?”
Boldo seemed confused. “I don’t understand what you are talking about.”
“I, I mean. I want to t-talk to her. C-can you make me look like a young man?” Robert thought that was a stupid idea.
“You want to be young?” Boldo started laughing again.
“I know it is impossible, but just, even if it’s for a moment…”
“It’s possible,” Boldo answered shortly.
“What? It is?”
“Yes, but it is dangerous.”
“How?” Robert asked. He grabbed hard on his bleeding left arm.
“You will die.”
Robert took two cans of beer and gave one to Boldo and sat down on the couch.
“Thanks.” Boldo drank a sip of beer. Robert was still not sure what he was doing. He was in love with Sara, his daughter was sick, and he gave most of the money he had to them, he tried to fight a robber, and he brought that robber/murder/shaman into his home and shared his deepest feelings with him. He was not even sure if he was dreaming or not.
“Hey, I have a question.” Robert asked.
“What?”
“If you can do magic, why do you try to rob people?”
“We need stuff like ingredients. Even if it is small, when you try to control a person’s mind and behavior, we need a spell. It’s not Harry Potter or Gandalf magic. You need to prepare, and also…” Boldo pulled up his shirt. Robert could see small petal- looking tattoos next to his belly.
“Do you see this?” Boldo pointed to one of the petals at the edge. It was fading.
“I am dying and my ability as a shaman is vanishing.”
“You are dying?”
Boldo smiled lightly and nodded. “When I was dating my wife, her father did not like me. He was a gypsy that was living around Scotland; he told me that I didn’t look like an honest man. She and I loved each other, and I told her father that I would do anything to have her. She and her father were both shaman. Her father said I would betray his daughter, and I said I would never do that. My wife and I did not back out, and he finally approved our marriage. However, he never trusted me, and gave me one condition. It was the curse. If something happened to my wife, the curse started activating. If I died first, it wouldn’t matter. If she were to die, I would die in 100 days. It was a one-sided curse. It also applied if she got sick. If she got sick, I got sick, too. I said yes to this because I loved her so much.”
Robert was just listening to Boldo, trying to believe his story.
“I killed my wife 16 days ago, and the curse activated.”
Robert asked him a question carefully.
“Why…did you kill your wife?”
“She was cheating on me with my assistant. I was mad so I killed both of them, but I didn’t mean to kill anybody, but… it was an accident.”
At that moment, Robert thought Boldo looked very sad. Robert thought about his life. They had one thing in common. The difference was Boldo loved his wife, and Robert did not.
“Couldn’t you read her or him before?”
“No. Between us, we can hide it from each other.” They both took a sip of beer and Boldo kept talking.
“Anyway, one tattoo for one day. I can only live for 84 days. I studied about this curse, and this won’t go away, unless… I can pass this to other person, and that person is going to be you.”
“What?”
Boldo was looking at Robert and Robert tried avoiding Boldo’s eyes.
“Don’t worry. I am not reading you.”
Robert did not trust him.
“Like I said before, I am not a good man. I don’t do good deeds. I just help people fulfill what they want. However, everything comes with a price.”
“Yes. You said I will die,” Robert said and Boldo continued.
“I want you to carry my curse and then, I can make you a younger man. It will last 80 something days; it depends on when I change you, and after that you will die. I think you can live around 30 years more from now. Is your 30 years of sad life more valuable than 80 days as a young man?”
“How do you know that?”
“I just can tell. Anyways, you exchange your life as payment for becoming a young man.”
“How long can I live young, if I don’t carry your curse?”
“I won’t tell you.” Boldo smiled.
“Why?”
“Does it matter? It is my terms and the choice is yours, plus I need $20,000 in cash.”
“How young will I be?”
“You can choose.”
“Early 20’s. Possible?”
“Of course.”
Robert started thinking about the deal. This is not a fair deal. I don’t know if I can trust this guy…
“Look,” Boldo said. “Let’s be honest. I know that you don’t have much attached to your life. I want to live, and you don’t. However, you want something really bad. I am just giving you that, and I will get what I want. It is a win-win game.” Boldo already knew about how Robert felt about his life.
“Am…I going to go to hell after I die? I mean, if I take your deal.”
“It depends on how you lived in this life. My mojo will not affect that as long as you don’t do horrible stuff with your young body. I don’t touch your soul. Sometimes there are people who make deals with devils. If you do that you will go to hell, but I don’t do that.”
Robert exhaled. He was still confused if that was real or not. He could not believe that he was listening to a shaman. On the other hand, he imagined how grateful he would be if he could be with Sara; even if it was just for a small amount of time. His head was full of thoughts.
“Make your choice,” Boldo said.
Robert looked up and exhaled. He slowly put his head down, and saw Boldo sitting in front of him. He told him what he had in his mind.
“I, I want...”