Chapter 4
Holker Stadium at dawn
They traveled the rest of the night, as the ship’s captain Icabod Soft was worried about being chased by Sam’s guards. They started to go through a red and green floating cloud of gas. The cloud made your vision of the planets, stars, and moons distorted. It looked as if they were driving through a dream with no end. They looked out the window; and saw a pair of comets speeding past.
“God I hate space!” Beth cried dourly, her hands fixing the thick blue curtains. “Is there anything else to look at?” Beth asked angrily, as she drank some wine with her legs propped up and spread eagle. She glared out at the odd visions she was seeing, and wished for a face to punch. Beth and Gloria were in their private suite enjoying some of the finer things, Doritos and Clam dip. The room was all red in color-golden ceilings as she had requested-with black pillows on the car shaped bed.
“It won’t last forever, my love,” Gloria said after setting down her crystal goblet. “You just have to think about glory, triumph…and success. These are the things you’ve earned in your career, you deserve them,” Gloria said reassuringly as she took off her top; laying down beside Beth on the floor quietly.
Beth glared at Gloria, and raised her hand like she was going to slap her. And when Gloria smiled, she slapped her hard across the mouth and said angrily,” Go reassure some cornfield PONY! I’m not that weak! Now, sorry about delivering your comeuppance, but you’ve been getting indignant. I won’t stand for it, not now not ever. God, can we fly a different direction already?” Beth spoke with a never before seen irritability in her voice (that scared Gloria and she was used to Beth). She kicked the outside window with both feet hard 4 times, nearly breaking it. Then she saw what appeared to be bright lights in the distance. She stood up, adjusted her shoulder pads, and eyed the lights intently.
“What is it?” Gloria wondered as she lay there nearly naked now.
Beth looked at the oncoming lights and felt her happiness level rise. They broke through a large section of cloud; and saw a Spacestop-which was another name for a convenient space station- some 30 minutes ahead of them. It was large like a ballpark on steroids; and shaped like a giant pair of lions. There were pathways leading out from the main body of the Spacestop. And these pathways were no more than 30 feet wide; and they led off in several hundred directions. It looked as if the people walking on them were walking on air, with lights guiding their way.
“Oh, thank you director, that was a good take,” Beth muttered her eyes never leaving the Spacestop. “Gloria, we’ve got to mobilize! We’re going captain hunting, and we’re going to divert this ship for some s and s. Sex and shopping, what else! Get up, we need to be swift and nimble,” Beth demanded as she started to fuss with her hair. She hurried across the room and put on some thick red lipstick; and a white sheer dress with the word FAME sewn around the hip in diamonds. Gloria put on her purple cat suit; and they headed up the outside hallway.
“This could be risky, Beth,” Gloria said as she fidgeted with her suit around her crotchless panties.
“Would you shut up already?” Beth insisted. “God, I can maneuver us through all obstacles. I just need some faith and a decent script.”
Beth spied the ship’s captain Icabod, walking across the hallway smiling to everyone and waving his hand; and then he ducked into his state room. Beth felt her face get sweaty, and her eyes light up. She knew this hayseed of a captain would fall under her spell like so many others had.
“Hello there, Captain, I wanted to tell you something if I may,” Beth breezed into his state room. She made sure her ass was facing him, as she pretended to care about his photos on the wall (mostly of his cat Drillbit).
“Hi there, aren’t you Beth, that famous actress or something?”
Beth turned and smiled with her tongue sticking just out over lower lip. She said in a sultry voice,” Yes, I’m that good.”
Gloria grinned, making her way over to the couch (next to Icabod’s favorite red velvet chair). She fussed with her breasts and smiled at Icabod.
“What can I do, do you for, do I mean, help you with?”
“Cap ‘in, I so love space, but I need a break from the beauty of it all,” Beth used her demure voice-one that sounded roughly 14 years old (as her acting coach Hal Pencil had taught her). “I mean, if only there were a space station where we could stop, ah, it hurts,” Beth said coyly as she rubbed nonexistent sweat from her brow.
“Ya know I’m really not allowed to make pit stops.”
Beth groaned and arched her back into a very sexual pose.
“I don’t know, Captain, she’s in dire need of a break from all this,” Gloria said her pouty lip not lost on Icabod. “Could you maybe, just stop for an hour? That’s not too bad is it?” Gloria spoke with an innocence she had learned from shaking down her rich parents when she was young; and she put her hands on her inner thighs and titled her head back (causing her breasts to seem much larger).
Icabod was very aroused by both of them; and had impure thoughts on his mind.
“Yes, would it really hurt that bad?” Beth asked her finger running ever so close to her pussy. “I mean, I just feel awful all of the sudden. I don’t,” Beth stopped speaking and Icabod jutted forward. She pulled up on her dress, showing some leg.
“You know you’re right, we should stop,” Icabod agreed with a bright smile (the exact kind new employees at the gap are taught to master). “I just hadn’t realized how sick everyone was. O.k. then, if I see a Spacestop we’ll pull in. How’s that, happy now, Beth?”
Beth laughed into her hand and said firmly,” I believe we saw one just a short while ago didn’t we, Gloria?”
“Yes we did, you’ll need to slow the ship immediately.”
“Consider it done,” Icabod replied quickly, he sprung out of his seat and hurried into the control room. There were 50 crew members monitoring every aspect of the ship in a star design shaped room. The glowing control panels-using a dull light that reduced glare-had several staff members wearing royal blue helmets that locked onto your head (this way they were able to interface directly with the ship). There was a sign reading IF WE LAND SAFELY, I APOLOGIZE perched atop a stuffed crow in the corner.
Beth and Gloria followed him in to close the deal.
“I love a simpleton, they bring me endless joy and happiness,” Beth said honestly as she rubbed her back. “My, what a fine day we’ve found, Gloria,” Beth remarked as she stood there watching Icabod adjust the gauges; and slow the ship to a standstill in seconds.
“There we go, I see the station, and I’m turning around,” Icabod bellowed, his eyes focused to the point of really bad acting, Beth thought. “Every hand on deck be ready for docking!” said Icabod firmly. “We can climb this mountain before it climbs us,” Icabod said boldly, as he hoped to impress Beth and
Gloria. The ship stopped, turned, and headed into the Spacestop at a slow rate of speed. They came to rest and the airlock closed around the ship. Icabod said happily,” There, I took care of BUS’NESS! Ladies, would you escort me to the Spacestop?”
“No, god no we’re not in the mood for company. Some other time, trust me, we’ll have our fun,” Beth said hollowly with her face smirking at Icabod; then she walked briskly out of the room. She strode down the hallway, smiling contently, and humming the closing credits to Shadow Thief.
Meanwhile Jim and everyone were wondering why they had stopped all of the sudden. Then they heard Icabod say over the intercom,” Just a stop to grab some supplies. Feel free to explore this Spacestop, but do not trust anyone. I repeat don’t trust anyone, that person is invariably a thief or murderer. The Captain out,” Icabod said boldly.
“Huh, fine by me, let’s party,” Jim said as he acted like he was doing arm curls. “If they give you lemons, learn how to sell them as grapes. Sorry, my old man used to say that, I’m not sure what the hell it means,” Jim said as he popped the veins out of his arms by flexing his biceps.
“I only buy lemons if I get to PELT, the person that sold them to me in the EYE,” Jen said as she threw soft punches at Jim’s stomach. “Jim, you haven’t broached pelting, I’m disappointed. Fred, you’d let me pelt you wouldn’t ya?” Jen asked as she grinned and pushed on Fred’s back with the top of her head.
Fred laughed, embarrassed but loving the attention. ”Jen, I would, but only in fantasyland. See, those lemons leave marks, can’t have, won’t,” Fred said sarcastically as he moaned like Jen was hurting him.
Jim walked out onto the grass covered walkway leading into the Spacestop, and breathed a sigh of relief. He moved the heels of his feet over the grass barefoot, left, right, and then left again and giggled like he was 9 years old.
“This is real grass,” Jim exclaimed as he smiled like a lottery winner. Who would have thunk it to do this, ya know?” Jim asked as he was giddy now and giggling; and he carried his shoes in his hands and walked barefoot into the Spacestop.
“Aliens, weirdos, Jim-kin,” Jen spoke in a southern accent and added. “I’ve seen ‘em, I don’t like ‘em either. I once had a whole grape stole by some Jim-kin, not good, hurt, hurt real bad.” Jen took her shoes off and ran past Jim.
“Hey, come back here!” Stephen insisted as he and Jack watched an unsavory crowd of people crowing up ahead. There was a small stadium behind them called the Holker at Spacestop. And in the Holker many things happened (none of them good).
“God, Stephen, they have small town shields on,” Jack said as he jogged with Stephen. “They really think people are goodhearted, it’s amazing to me. I can’t remember the last time I went somewhere like this, and didn’t watch myself,” Jack said contemplatively as he fussed with his shirt.
Stephen watched Jen run and jump into a small fish shaped fountain of purple water, quizzically. He would have given anything to be that free again (even once more). He started to well up with tears, before he caught himself.
“It can be very dangerous, people in large cities don’t care how liked you were back home,” Stephen coughed and wiped his eyes. “If they want you dead, then dead you be,” said Scott as he looked and saw a wild boar shaped blue building to his right. The building had nefarious characters lingering out front-long beards and visible blood on their hands and clothes-and it was making him nervous.
They each walked into the nearest bar. And when they did, Jim saw someone he hoped he never would again, his ex-girlfriend Danielle. Jim said angrily,” Fuck!”
“What’s wrong?” Jen asked.
“My ex is here, I have a favor to ask you, Jen.”
“Anything, but no human football stuff,” Jen smiled and continued, “been screwed by that be-fore.”
“I need you to pretend to be my girlfriend, can you do that?” Jim asked his voice shaky at best; and he watched Danielle-Gulp being her last name-laughing with 3 men in leather Mad Hatter style hats.
“O.k., but do I get to spend half of your money and treat you like dirt?”
“Of course, that was assumed,” Jim wisecracked his face trying not to laugh for fear of attracting Danielle. “Look, let’s not go near her, but if she comes over, lay it on thick. Oh damn IT! She just looked right at me. Now she’s waving, shit,” Jim muttered as he forced a one handed nervous wave (that he thought about turning around and giving the middle finger as soon as he raised his hand). And he smiled a more awkward smile than hitting on your aunt’s friend He knew she would try something, and he just didn’t have the energy to deal with her negativity today (or any day anymore).
“Don’t worry, Jim, embarrassment only lasts forever,” Jen wisecracked. “Trust me, I can blow this for you,” Jen said sarcastically as she wrapped her arms around Jim’s waist and smiled up at him.
Danielle made her way through the people; with a bright smile on her beautiful face. She was all of 5 foot 8 inches tall-short for her family her mother was 6 foot 5 inches of mean-and her body was very thin. She had on a little black dress and one stocking was torn. Her purse was filled with an assortment of medicines she didn’t need, but wanted. Her hair was wavy and brown like chocolate.
“JIM NUTS, how are you?!” Danielle yelled as she cackled-sounding more like a wino than a woman her age-and she nearly vomited on a woman standing nearby when she did. Jim grinned, and tried to forget how many times she had cheated on him, and stole his money.
Jim rubbed Jen’s back, and Jen tried not to laugh, but it was too funny. Fred watched everything from behind Jim (just in case he needed him). Jack and Scott grabbed-black and turquoise colored and egg shaped-seats at the bar. Then they turned to watch Jim squirm.
“Jim Nuts, is going down in flames,” Scott said his eyes undressing a blonde woman in the corner.
“You don’t have to tell me that, Scott. He’s cooked,” Jack replied.
“Hey, ahh…” Jim said hollowly like he’d forgotten her name.
“Jim NUTS, stop acting like a burnout,” Danielle said as she put her arms out for Jim to hug her and he didn’t move. “God, I’m just not in the mood for jokes and pokes. Jim Nuts, did you miss me? Come on, you can tell?” Danielle asked as she pouted her lips and kept halfheartedly pulling her bra strap up.
“Yeah, oh now I remember, we dated once,” Jim said hollowly as he gave her a few hard nods and no real eye contact. “Huh, well you sure are…standing there. Hey, this is my girlfriend, Jen, she’s rich,” Jim said as he smiled (he loved watching Danielle squirm). He folded his arms and started moving his neck like a chicken.
“OH, it’s that chicken neck thing again,” Danielle snapped as she kicked the side of a barstool. “Fine, be a total whatever person. Jim Nuts, your girlfriend here is not what I had hoped for you. I mean, you deserve better,” Danielle spoke in a way that made you wonder if she actually thought her ploys would work. She grimaced, and pulled her red bra strap up slowly.
“You skank!” barked Jen. “Nice to meet you!” said Jen loudly as she made a fish like expression-her eyes showing her discontent-and offered Danielle her hand. When Danielle went to shake it, she jerked it away from her (a technique she had mastered in junior high, then called Slicking someone.
“You gotta be quick if you want that handshake!” Jim waited for the perfect moment to look Danielle in the eye, and it came, crushing her.
Danielle looked at Jim like he was an asshole-common among her ex-boyfriends-and Jim laughed hard like a jackass. Danielle snarled, her eyes filling with rage,” Jim Nuts, dump small fry half potato here, and let’s party.”
“Hold on, that’s large fry, and you’re just as smart as your dress,” Jen corrected while she grabbed Jim’s backside. “Is that a JC Penny’s summer half off sale? Are those men’s underwear you have on? Really?” asked Jen as she tried not to laugh (failing a second later). Jen walked in between Jim and Danielle; and tapped her pointer finger to her own temple.
“Jim Nuts, this little tramp here is bad times,” objected Danielle as Jim shook his head HELL NO. “You remember what I said about bad times?”
“Something about oiling up your neck or something, I don’t know,” Jim said dismissively as he waved his hand for Danielle to go. Jim was invigorated by how easily he was handling her. “Half the stuff you say is gibberish anyway. Did you go all the way through 5th or 4thgrade?” Jim asked sarcastically as he reached around Jen’s waist-a gesture not lost on Danielle-and put his hands on her hips.
Danielle saw this and she started to think Jim wasn’t the same old boyfriend she had met at the redemption center. Danielle sipped her beer and smirked as she looked down at her feet. She begged,” Look, don’t let our love die, NUTS. We can rekindle, find the OLD magic. Let us have our time in sun, warm sun, Nuts.