To Rini’s eyes, Mati had been more relaxed as she prepared to die on Sonmatia Seven.
She clutched at her dear friend constantly as Healer Dakalio and two helpers, both ursine, carefully prepared her for surgery. They got her comfortable on a strange bed that sensed when its shape was not just right, and changed without a word from patient or healer. They connected her blood to something Rini guessed was half creature, half machine.
Breakfast arrived. Rini received a tray, and Mati could feel the sugars and proteins enter her bloodstream directly. She grinned up at the love of her life as he chewed fruits and nuts.
Mati’s bed tilted up and the entire lower half of her body was immersed in a clear, warm liquid. Surgeon K’stimla arrived, and several more helpers.
Bird, reptile, and spider all greeted Mati and explained what they would be doing.
After the surgeon and her helpers arranged all the tools they would need, there came a moment of silence. It reminded Rini of star transit. Into the silence came a fuzzy purple ball that seemed to float down from the ceiling, then slowly swirl around Mati.
She giggled. “It tickles!”
Rini smiled just as the purple being came to him. He had only experienced his mind and soul touched so deeply once before — by Melorania.
When the fuzzy ball finished with Rini, it placed itself directly between the
NEBADOR Book Six: Star Station 97
two young humans, one hoping with all her heart to walk again, the other craving to prove his love.
The mantid surgeon touched Mati’s hand with one of her claws. “In a moment, Mati, you will sense that your companion is with you, and he will remain with you while you sleep and we fix your knee. Don’t be surprised if you have some strange dreams.”
A moment later Mati began to sense Rini’s presence, as if they were snuggled together by a campfire whispering secrets to each other. “That’s okay,” she mumbled in a slurred voice. “I’ve always had strange . . .”
Mati’s mind slept, but her body quivered on the edge of terror.
Rini’s outer senses dulled as the purple being of light linked his mind with the sleeping girl. He felt her awareness slip away, and sensed the nervous tension throughout her body.
“Find her breath,” K’stimla instructed. “Take charge of it and breathe as one.”
Rini sensed the last shreds of Mati’s willpower fade away just as they began to breathe in unison. As a test, he held his breath for a moment, and Mati also stopped breathing. Then she took a big breath when he did.
“Good. Find her heartbeat. It’s faster than yours right now.”
Even as he listened for Mati’s pulse, Rini was surprised to discover he could control his own — a little slower or faster — just by thinking about it.
He guessed he shouldn’t go too far in either direction. Suddenly he heard Mati’s heart in his mind, racing faster than his own. He tried to slow it by sheer force of will, but nothing happened.
A subtle smile appeared on his face.
Rini speeded his heartbeat until it matched the pulse of the girl beside him
— dangerously fast, it seemed to him. Soon their hearts beat in unison. He willed both hearts to slow. Mati’s heart followed his for a moment, then slipped away and sped up. Three times Rini had to let his heart return to a faster rhythm, then slowly and gently coax his beloved’s heart slower.
“As you can see, Rini, that’s more difficult. There, that’s a good pulse.
Now for the hardest part of all. Mati may be asleep, but she’s still tense, and that’s causing high blood pressure. Caress and massage every part of her body
NEBADOR Book Six: Star Station 98
until she relaxes.”
Rini had massaged Mati’s arms and shoulders many times, and sometimes even her back, but never from the inside. Now he willed himself to explore every part of her sleeping form, to coax every muscle to melt under his soothing mental touch. He smiled when he came to parts that were different than his. He frowned when he sensed the broken bones and misshapen muscles around her knee.
“Good. Take your time. Blood pressure is coming down. Don’t forget her feet.”
Rini smiled as he mentally massaged Mati’s feet, one at a time. He was surprised to find bone and muscle damage in the ankle of her good leg. He cringed, suddenly realizing that Mati was probably in pain whenever she walked anywhere. Without opening his eyes, he told K’stimla.
“Yes, we know about that, Rini, and will fix it, along with minor damage in several other joints.”
Rini was happy that all of Mati’s wounds would be healed. He continued to work his way through her body, coaxing each part to relax, some muscles requiring three or four passes.
“Good, Rini. Breathing is okay. Heartbeat a little slower, please — yes, that’s good. The surgery will now begin.”
For the next hour, Rini felt dull sensations as the surgeon cut into Mati’s knee and began moving pieces around. He kept watch over breath, heartbeat, and muscle tension, but the fuzzy purple being would no longer let him focus his attention on Mati’s bad knee, and he guessed why.
“This is going well, Rini, and I’m putting Healer G’sonk in charge of the bone reconstruction while I start on the left ankle.”
Rini kept his eyes closed, but sensed the spider begin work.
“A little stronger heart rhythm, please, Rini.”
He smiled shyly, realizing he had let Mati’s pulse get too slow. He matched his heartbeat to hers and slowly strengthened both.
After another hour, K’stimla put the reptile to work on Mati’s ankle and came back around to observe the spider’s work. She spoke with Healer
NEBADOR Book Six: Star Station 99
Dakalio about blood sugar levels, then suddenly noticed the frown of concentration on Rini’s face.
“What’s
wrong,
Rini?”
At first Rini thought he could take care of Mati’s slow pulse himself, as he had done earlier. Now he was beginning to worry. “I . . . I’ve tried three times, and her heartbeat keeps slipping too low,” he said without opening his eyes or ceasing his effort.
K’stimla looked at some displays. “Try again.”
Rini concentrated once more, slowing his own heart to match, then using all his willpower to bring Mati’s back to a strong, steady rhythm. “It starts to follow me, then slips away.”
The surgeon spoke with Dakalio again, and he adjusted the nutrients going into Mati’s blood while watching the displays. “Not responding . . . getting weaker,” he reported.
She checked the progress of the spider and the reptile, saw no problems with either surgery site that should be causing Mati distress, and looked at her displays again while her mandibles twitched with worry.
“Rini, I think you’ll have to go into Mati’s mind. Something is causing her distress, and I can’t find it anywhere else. This is more dangerous . . .”
“I’ll do anything you need me to do.”
K’stimla smiled as only a mantis can. The purple being seemed to glow a little brighter as it deepened the link between the two humans.
As Rini willed himself to enter the mind of the sleeping girl, he was amazed by all the activity. Voices whispered, talked, laughed, or shouted. He glimpsed scenes from dozens of places around their kingdom, and a few from more recent months in the Manessa Kwi, as if someone was holding up pages from a picture book. Some scenes he recognized, but many he did not.
Although nearly overwhelmed by the sights and sounds, Rini focused on looking for something, anything, that would cause Mati’s heart to slow.
For what seemed like hours, he explored, searching for anything that could be the cause, but finding only noise and fragmented memories.
K’stimla quickly assigned the bird to care for Rini, and without his
NEBADOR Book Six: Star Station 100
knowledge, monitors were connected to his hands and nutrition added directly to his blood.
“He is strong, bok,” the avian healer announced after studying the displays, “but has a difficult task ahead.”
K’stimla
nodded.
What seemed like days, maybe weeks later, Rini found something that made him nearly cry out with relief. A single nerve pulsed with the same rhythm as Mati’s heart, down to about half the speed of his own. Wasting no time, Rini followed the nerve deeper and deeper into Mati’s mind.
The voices and other noises became louder, the flashes of visual memory more frequent, and both seemed to be from earlier in Mati’s life. The mental spaces Rini traveled were tighter now, and he sensed he was slowing down, as if trying to push through dense bushes in a forest. He clenched his teeth and forced his way through, still following the pulse of Mati’s heartbeat, desperately looking for the reason it was too slow.
K’stimla worked quickly but calmly, talking with her helpers, watching their work, and beginning the minor surgery needed to repair Mati’s right hip.
Two ursines fetched anything the surgeons needed, while Dakalio monitored blood, breath, and nutrition. The spider announced the completion of Mati’s new knee cap, and the reptile carefully re-attached leg muscles to ligaments and ligaments to ankle bone.
Rini was drenched in sweat and trembling from the effort of exploring Mati’s mind when he finally cried out, “A dark place! Cold and creepy. Very tangled. The slow heartbeat is coming from there.”
Memory voices assaulted him constantly, all yelling or screaming to hurry up or work harder. Flashes of whips and sticks made him cringe, and he felt the pain as if he was receiving the blows himself. Mentally, he held up his hands and arms, protecting himself and Mati as best he could. “I can’t get in there, it’s too tangled! But I have to! Mati can’t live with that pain!”
K’stimla looked at the purple being of light and they talked silently in her mind. After a minute, she nodded.
NEBADOR Book Six: Star Station 101
Rini, the purple spirit said to his mind, if I deepen the link enough for you to enter that place in your beloved, your minds will be linked for the rest of your lives, and you will never be free of each other’s thoughts and feelings. A link that deep drives some creatures insane. Humans are especially prone.
Rini swallowed. And if you don’t?
It appears that she will not survive the surgery.
I could not live, knowing I let that happen. Mati and I live together or we die together.
The glowing purple being quickly brightened, and Rini discovered he now had the power to dive into the deepest, darkest part of Mati’s mind.
He soon came upon a tangled bundle of nerves, glowing with a faint light from deep inside, but blackened, battered, and broken on the outside. Mean voices and heartless images hurled themselves at it constantly, and with every blow, another tiny part turned dark blue, cold, and icy.
“I found it,” he whispered.
The avian at his side heard and repeated for the other healers.
No more! Rini mentally screamed.
The hurtful memories paused, laughed, and resumed their attack.
Suddenly Rini realized he couldn’t fight this enemy with anger. He knew what he had to do. He took several slow, deep breaths, smiled, and moved forward, wrapping himself completely around the vulnerable part of Mati’s mind.
Now there are two of us! he warned the voices and the painful memories.
“Pulse is coming up,” Dakalio announced.
K’stimla studied the display. “How’s Rini?”
“Smiling. Heartbeat slow but getting stronger, bok.”
The head surgeon breathed a deep sigh of relief and continued reconstructing the layers of muscle and ligament in Mati’s right knee.
NEBADOR Book Six: Star Station 102
Deep Learning Notes
Few of us today have had the experience of placing our lives in other people’s hands, or having others place their lives in our hands. It is not something people choose to do, just for fun. It can have a huge impact on how much we trust other people in the future, both in general, and that type of person specifically (healers, in Mati’s case).
Surgeons today dream about machines that can regulate breathing, heartbeat, and muscle tension during surgery, but those things are under the control of the patient’s mind, so we can only attempt to influence them with drugs.
Why do you think the purple being would not let Rini focus his attention on Mati’s bad knee after surgery began?
“Traumatic” experiences (such as slavery) are capable of doing permanent damage to the human mind, even twisting it into insanity. It is also possible for people to go through the same traumatic experiences without any damage at all. Most people fall somewhere in between these extremes, deeply affected, but able to recover enough to go on with life. We can do little but guess at the differences between people that cause this wide range of reactions. Some possibilities:
- Having the will-power to survive and recover.
- Going through the experience with another.
- Having a trusted support-person during the recovery time.
- Being old enough to have already developed strong self-confidence.
- Having a personality temperament that is not highly-dependent on others for validation.
When Rini wrapped himself around the vulnerable place in Mati’s mind and declared “Now there are two of us,” how was that similar to Ilika’s offer to Buna in the water room near the end of Book One? How was it different?