An Expositional Explanation
I awoke in a strange bed in a room I didn’t recognize. The night came back in a rush. I felt dizzy. I looked over. The other side of the bed was empty. Had it all been a dream? No. My imagination wasn’t that good.
I looked around and found my clothes in a tangled pile on the floor. I sniffed them. Yuck. They smelled of stale booze and sweat. But then again, I wasn’t clean either, and I had nothing else to wear. I dressed.
The front door in the other room opened. Holly backed in, her hands full. She had clearly found time to shower. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail, and she was wearing jeans and a loose t-shirt under a light jacket. Even these plain clothes couldn’t hide her lithe figure. The light shone in her eyes, a deep clear blue. But at this moment it was the contents of her hands that managed to interest me most—breakfast. Her haul consisted of coffee with cream and sugar, three breakfast sandwiches, two scones, and a cookie. Not bad.
“Good morning, you.” She smiled at me.
I couldn’t help but smile back.
“Got some food for us.” She placed it all on a coffee table in front of the couch.
We devoured everything.
“Still eating a lot?” She asked as we both sat back.
“Yes. Wait, you know about that?”
“Mmhmm,” she purred as she curled up next to me on the couch. “Of course I know about that! I’m your doctor, after all,” she said playfully.
My curiosity warred with other, baser instincts.
“I’m terribly sorry I wasn’t able to be there. I do hope you can forgive me.” She bit her lip as she leaned forward.
She was forgiven.
My curiosity barely won out. I had too many questions to be dissuaded.
“So I’ve had a few, err, side effects. I was hoping to talk to you back at the doctor’s office.” Just bringing it up brought me back down to reality.
“I suppose you’re wondering what the hell happened to you,” Holly said as she sat back.
I instantly felt like I’d made a mistake. Killed the magical spell that had been put in place last night. Brought us back to our previous dynamic.
I nodded in response, afraid to say anything more.
“And I’m sure you’ve already concluded this wasn’t some simple cancer cure,” she continued.
I took a long sip of coffee and wiped my mouth on the provided napkin while I thought about where to begin.
“Yeah. About that. What exactly did I consent to? Could I have actually died?” If this was more than a cancer cure, how much was actually true?
“Well yes, that part was quite true,” she admitted.
Great. My face must have shown how I felt about that.
“Well, you did consent.” She smiled, but it was half-hearted.
“Yes I suppose I did.” I nodded more slowly than before.
“Seeing what you have become, would that have changed your decision?” she asked.
“No,” I answered quickly.
“I thought not. Besides, this outcome wasn’t a guarantee, it was far more likely to kill you,” she said, as if that made anything better.
“So what exactly was it?” I asked.
In response, Holly tucked her feet underneath her and settled in beside me on the couch.
“It, really was a virus. That part was also true. Its history is a bit controversial, to say the least. You’ll remember on your first visit I took a few samples of your blood? Those were for tests of compatibility between your body and the virus. Statistically, this particular virus would have about a ninety-eight percent mortality rate amongst the general population,” she spoke softly.
“What?” I asked stupidly.
“Hence the testing!” she exclaimed. “It really helps bring those numbers down,” she continued quickly.
“How much?” I asked.
“Somewhere between thirty and fifty percent will still have a negative reaction, including death.” She looked down.
“Riiigghhttt. Never tell me the odds.” I laughed weakly.
“Yeah?” She looked up at me.
Guess she wasn’t a Star Wars fan.
“Yeah. Can’t say I’m upset with the results, and not sure I would have been able to justify going through with it if I had known my chances. But then again, I was a dead man walking anyway, right?” I admitted.
“Right.” She didn’t sound reassured.
“Really. It’s fine.” I didn’t want her to feel bad.
I had been guaranteed death before the treatment. I was pretty happy with the results in the end.
“That does seem like a huge variance though,” I said.
I hoped to get her mind off having potentially killed me.
“Yes. Well there isn’t exactly a huge pool of test subjects. And the methods for testing have been, shall we say, controversial in the past,” she confessed.
“So, the majority of the world’s population would die outright from this virus, then over half of the remaining two percent would have a negative reaction,” I summarized. I guess my new math skills were finally coming in handy. “What kind of negative reaction?”
“Anything from completely debilitating seizures, early onset Parkinson's, extreme pain in all limbs, extreme arthritis, permanent coma, brain death…”
“Isn’t that last one just normal death?” I asked.
“Well technically the body would still be alive, and possibly even perfectly functioning! But the brain would have ceased all higher function. More like a zombie, than dead, really,” she explained.
“Thanks for that. I’ll sleep well tonight.” Were there really zombies out there with the potential for crazy abilities like mine?
“Very rare, I’ve never seen it happen. It’s more of a hypothetical,” she admitted.
“So reassuring.” I shuddered.
“Good thing you got lucky then, eh?” She jabbed me light-heartedly.
“Twice.” I winked in response.
“More than you know.” Holly laughed gave me a long look, then sighed and settled deeper against me.
I felt more confident now, talking to her, despite the stupid grin on my face. Maybe it was because my body was different. Maybe it was because we had explored those differences together. Or maybe it was just that she seemed much more vulnerable, sitting here next to me on the couch talking about all the horrific things that could have happened to me. Things she would have been responsible for, in a way.
“Just sit back, get comfortable, and I’ll explain everything,” she said.
So I followed her example. I even risked wrapping an arm around her. She didn’t seem to mind.
“You were an exception to the exception. In a couple different ways. The virus infects a person and overwrites their DNA. It makes permanent changes in the very structure, the coding of their body.
“Most—no, all previous patients’ bodies have fought this change. If they fight too long, the body overheats and the subject dies. Or if the virus is only partially effective, any number of horrific things can happen. Only in your case, this didn’t happen. Your body worked with the virus almost symbiotically.”
“So,” I interrupted, “my DNA is different? Am I still human?”
“Depends on your definition of what it means to be human,” she answered seriously.
“Wait, really?”
“Of course you’re still human.” Holly laughed. “Just with some upgrades.”
“Like what?” I asked, suddenly more interested.
“I’m getting to that. Now stop interrupting.” She tossed a pillow at me.
I signaled for her to continue and made a zipping motion over my lips.
“The whole process of the virus infecting and changing the body normally takes at least a week. The entire time the patient is usually unconscious. Introducing foreign substances, such as food, can cause complications. An IV is about the only safe means of nutrition and hydration. That’s why I wasn’t there when you awoke. I was expecting you to be out much longer, and be much weaker. Certainly not up and out the door the very next day. That is unheard of.”
“But they just let me go?” I couldn’t help myself asking.
“Dr. Lester oversaw you after you awoke and determined that you were okay to be released. He is an expert in this field, one of only two in the country. The virus and this treatment are extremely sensitive. He decided the safest course of action was to simply let you go once he determined that you were healthy. Which isn’t to say we haven’t kept tabs on you,” she finished with a sly smile.
“The only explanation we’ve been able to come up with to explain this is that it must have something to do with the way your body reacted to the virus. The virus that infected your body is not the same that infected mine. Yes, I am like you. That’s why I’m on this project. In order to understand what this is, you have to know where it came from….”
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Humanity has always been trying to create a better version of itself. Some will say it’s a natural evolution. Others will say we are following in the footsteps of our creator. In the end, everyone is guilty of it. A want, a need, a burning desire to be better. Some people will go to unnatural lengths to get there. From Icarus’ wings to a guy at the gym pumping juice just for his own gain. But in the last seventy years, serious progress has been made. Three factions led the way.
During World War Two, Germany began experimenting in earnest. Even before they were losing the war. They used steroids on their athletes, followed by their soldiers. They used synthetic methamphetamine to give their pilots an edge. They experimented on prisoners with the most unethical methods one could imagine. They tested the extreme physical endurances to see what a human body could handle. From the Western front, soldiers told stories of camps and prisons where these took place. But the Western POWs were mostly treated better than this. It didn’t become clear until the rest of the world learned the true nature of concentration camps, once they were liberated. These places were literally hell on Earth for their prisoners. However, the worst of it wasn’t even on our front. The stories from the Eastern front, what the soviet POWs had to go through… The Soviet Union may have been ahead of the US in super-soldier development solely based on research recovered during their final push towards Germany.
The Japanese were the next closest. They experimented on Chinese civilians and POWs. Unit 731 used lethal experiments to test biological and chemical warfare agents. Their goal was a better understanding of human biology, how the body worked, and how best to make it stop working. They had no stipulations against using men, women, or children. What they did was unspeakable, and they were brought up on war-crimes against humanity upon the resolution of World War Two. Many were given pardons if they worked with the US and shared their knowledge.
Which of course leads us to the final player in this game of lives, the United States. The US has a history of experimentation gone wrong, but it’s the best at covering its dirty laundry. Few stories escaped the Japanese internment camps. The whole act couldn’t be covered up, so it was excused and quickly dismissed. A simple misunderstanding because of circumstances. But no, these camps weren’t some sort of summer vacation for holding suspects during wartime. And not everyone made it home safely. This is the country responsible for the Tuskegee experiment that went on into the seventies, after all. But the US didn’t begin investing earnestly into the idea of super-soldiers until the Cold War with Operation Paperclip. They recruited ex Nazi and Japanese scientists, specifically targeting those who worked on the worst of those war experiments. The US also tried to focus on the psychological aspect of human condition, with limited success.
The real game-changer came in the nineties. Researchers found that while they could experiment, operate, drug, or change a single individual, it was at best unsustainable. Rarely did they make a single soldier better—mostly their experiments resulted in injury or death. It was the rise of the digital age that allowed for further progress.
First, computers allowed for more precise calculations, a better understanding of information already gathered, much better cataloging, and the ability to build on that knowledge. The second piece of the puzzle was more of a byproduct of computers themselves: programming. In the eighties, the US government “officially” started planning the idea of mapping the human genome. The source code for humanity. Once this process began, the successor to Paperclip took over. They immediately started trying to re-code human DNA. And what better source than already completed pieces?
They began trying to splice human and animal DNA to enhance certain traits.
The problems they faced were a result of compartmentalization. Different departments each took animal DNA and tried to insert it for their own purposes. Each department working on a different, sometimes completely incompatible piece of the puzzle. Why not have the strength of a gorilla, speed of a cheetah, regenerative abilities of a zebrafish, stomach acidity of a hyena, and stamina of, well, a human? Soldiers would be faster and stronger, could heal from battle, and survive in the field forever foraging off anything. Only, our DNA works because it all works together. They used viruses, much like what we gave you, to infect these people with their smorgasbord of DNA, hoping it would recode the human body. All they actually accomplished was to kill off a bunch of volunteers.
They realized they needed to do better, but they also needed more bodies. Their sample size was too small. Healthy individuals would only do it if they had no other options. The injured quickly stopped volunteering when their buddies stopped coming back from these government experiments meant to give them a new shot at life.
Luckily for the successor to Operation Paperclip, 9/11 happened. Two new wars started almost immediately. The government gained the ability to indiscriminately detain people with terrorism charges and ship them off to any CIA black-site in the world. Guantanamo was the perfect smokescreen, taking all the attention for a fraction of the prisoners. No one really looked at the numbers; they just focused on the location.
While this gave them new bodies to work on, they didn’t want their actual super-soldiers to come from terrorist stock. So who else? Where was there a demographic of available bodies that no one is paying attention to? Prisons were the obvious answer. They had limitations like terrorists, but not as significant, especially for non-violent offenders. Still, can’t have people disappearing left and right. So they focused on those with no family or connections. Or if they did have families, those who wouldn’t be missed. But even this resource was inadequate.
Progress was slow and bodies limited. Where could they find people whose families wanted nothing to do with them? To pretend like they didn’t even exist? Or even voluntarily give them away to a secret program with the faint promise of making them better?
The answer came from an unexpected place. A prisoner that was supposed to feed into the system was shipped off somewhere else. She was eventually tracked down, she was in a mental asylum. They quickly realized they had a whole new supply on their hands. Hospitals meant to look after the mentally ill. Unfortunately, a lot of guardians were eager to be free of what they saw as a burden. They were quick to sign any non-disclosure agreements and ship off their charges. Even caring families were willing to undergo experimental testing at the promise that their child could be cured. The program preyed on these types.
So, with fresh bodies, the program was able to greatly ramp up experimentation. They tried variations, tweaked numbers, kept implementing and deleting lines of DNA. And they stumbled upon a partial solution entirely by accident. Even now they are undoubtedly tweaking the formula, but they were able to create a stronger human, with greater eyesight, conditioning, stamina, recovery, mental capacity, reflexes… you name it, it was improved. Or, more accurately, it had a chance at being improved. The problem was, everyone reacted differently.
You are different.
Another team broke off once they had more people to experiment on. They thought, why try to plug and play when we can simply write our own code? Why are muscles made up of this tissue and not that? Why can’t we engineer, from the ground up, a human based entirely on new materials? You are the result of this line of thinking. To be honest, I don’t even know how your body works, or what all changed. And as far as I know, you are the only one of your kind.
____________________
I sat back. Not what I had expected.
“Are you sure I am human?” I wondered again.
“That depends on what it means to be human, I suppose,” she answered. “You are you.”