I turned around as he took the towel and dried my hair, taking his time. Next, he took another towel, and dried off my body. He took his time while he did this too, very careful, gentle. For a man, he was well-reserved. He must find me utterly unattractive. I didn’t mind. He wasn’t that great to look at either with his receding hairline.
“I’m sorry about the lab before.”
I didn’t say anything as he helped me put my dress and shoes on.
“I was ordered to inject you.”
“Did you have to do it so many times?”
“I’m sorry about that too. I could tell you were in pain, but that would mean you were a Stargazer, and I had to know the truth.”
“The pain was horrible. I can still feel it inside my head and the back of my neck hurts.”
He swept my hair aside and rubbed his thumb over the spot where Dr. Keller had injected me. I didn’t like him touching me, but I really didn’t have a choice other than to use my superb strength to crush his bones, but that would definitely mean my death, or at least torture until death. I had wanted to die earlier, but now I wasn’t so sure. I had questions and I wanted them answered.
“It’s bruised,” he murmured. “Would you like to go to the infirmary?”
I turned around and saw the look of concern on his face. “Is that another word for lab?”
“No, no one will harm you. We have something that came make your head feel better and heal that bruise.”
“You tortured me and now you want to help me?”
“I’m sorry. I was just doing my job.”
“What is it with everyone around here? You torture me because it’s your job. Henrietta is a willing slave. I don’t get it. This Sanctuary sounds more like a Hellhole.”
“The Sanctuary is everything,” he said, indoctrinated.
“Sure it is.”
“We have universal health care. Let me take you to the infirmary. We have medicines that are like magic.”
He smiled, as if that was supposed to make me feel better.
“Do I have a choice?”
“You can go back to your cell, be in pain, or you can come with me. Don’t worry. I won’t bite you.”
“If I’m so loathsome, why are you even bothering?”
“You’re not loathsome. I think you’re beautiful.” He took one step towards me and I instantly backed away. “I’m sorry. Let’s go to the infirmary. You’ll feel better then.”
I sighed, unsure, but then said, “All right.”
He held out his hand.
“What?” I asked, confused.
“We have to be bonded.”
“No, I’m not doing that.”
“If you don’t, you’ll be knocked out and taken back to your cell. Do you really want to go back there?”
I reluctantly took his hand. He weaved his fingers between mine and squeezed.
“Can everyone bond?”
“Yes.”
“How do you do it?”
“It’s in our DNA.”
“You had something injected in you like the Brain Boosters?”
“No, we were just born with the ability to bond.”
“You attach your hand to someone like glue?”
He took his free hand and pointed to his head. “It’s in our mind too. We decide to bond, to attach to someone, and then our skin does the rest.”
“What about arms? Or legs?”
“Yes, it works the same way.”
“Are you serious?”
He smiled. “Why? Is that weird?”
“Yes, it is.”
“You Stargazers are weird to us.”
“Loren thinks I’m half-Stargazer, half-human.”
“You may be that, but there’s Stargazer in you, no doubt.” He ran his fingers through my half-dried lavender hair. “How do you do that?”
“It’s in my DNA,” I returned with a smile.
He smiled. “Here, let me show you.” He let go of my hand and held my wrist. “You’re strong. Try to pull away.”
I tried and tried, but we were stuck together.
“That’s weird and neat at the same time.”
He smiled. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”
He held my hand again and we were bonded as we left the privy. All the guards stared at us with amazement.
“Is it unusual for you to be holding hands with a suspected Stargazer?”
“It’s unusual for me to be holding hands with anyone. I’m a bit of a loner.”
“You’re not with Dr. Keller?”
Victor shivered, but he wasn’t cold. “Not that old thing.”
“How old is she?”
“Old.”
“How old are you?”
“I’m twenty-eight. Do I look old?”
I stopped to take a look at him. We had been walking down various hallways with guards in black uniform and doctors in white lab coats staring at us. We were in front of a door that read INFIRMARY.
Victor’s dark brown hair was receding a bit, but other than that, his hair was full. His goatee was in need of a trim and a good shave to remove the speckled hairs from along his jaw and under, reaching down his neck. He had dark brown eyes with hints of green.
I shook my head. “No, you don’t look old.”
“How old are you?”
I shook my head again. “I don’t know.”
“You really don’t know anything about yourself, do you?”
I did remember the ocean and the forest and the shadow, but I wasn’t going to tell him that—especially the shadow of a man who was lost to me.
“No, I don’t know anything.”
“Well, Stargazers are different. Perhaps you’re a hundred?” He furrowed his brow at my hair. “Oh, yeah, I see it now.”
“What?”
He pointed at the top of my head. “I already see a gray hair.”
My hand flew to the top of my head, searching. “Where is it?”
He laughed. “I’m just kidding. You really do act human.”
“I am human,” I said softly, unsure, but still defensive of who I still hoped to be.
He didn’t respond. He could’ve disputed me. He could’ve agreed with me. He did nothing but frown and turn to walk inside the infirmary. I followed with no choice because our hands were bonded.
Everyone stared at us. There were a few patients inside. All but one was unconscious. The patient was very much awake and he stared at me with abhorrence. It was a middle-aged man with gray hair. His right arm was badly bruised.
“What happened to him?” I asked Victor.
I seemed to care about the man, even though he didn’t seem to care about me—looking at me as if I were a monster.
“Let’s find out.”
Victor and I walked near the man, who was lying on a narrow hospital bed. The whole room was very clean, sanitary, but mechanical. Machines were all around with their blinking lights, and white lights on the ceiling. I didn’t feel cozy in this place and wondered if the patients felt the same way.
“Get that thing away from me!” the man yelled out, angered at my approach.
“Dr. Jamison,” said a woman in a white lab coat, “what are you thinking bringing that thing in here?!”
She was short with shoulder-length red hair. She didn’t seem like she hated me, looking at me curiously, but she didn’t like that I was here. I didn’t see what harm I could cause, considering Victor was attached to me, but they seemed to know who I was when I didn’t. I was incredibly strong, but I didn’t know why, and I didn’t know how destructive I could really be. I loosened my embrace of Victor’s hand, afraid that I was going to crush his bones with my fingers, but he clasped me tighter to him—holding me to him.
“She’s not a thing,” said Victor defensively. “She’s in need of medical attention, but she was concerned about this patient here,” he said, motioning with his free hand to the wide-eyed man.
“He is none of its concern, or yours, Dr. Jamison. We all know what kind of medicine you practice, and it’s abhorrent, even to an alien species.”
Victor’s hand tensed with mine. If I were weak, his grip would have hurt me, but I didn’t feel as if I were in any danger.
“Dr. Eyre, you have no idea what medicine I practice.”
Dr. Eyre scanned the room, looking at her colleagues, who had retreated away from the scene. Obviously, they were not going to come to her defense.
“We’ve heard rumors.”
“Do you believe in every rumor you hear? For if I was to believe in a recent one, I’d say you were unqualified to work here.”
She gasped. “Me?”
“Did you not last week kill a patient on purpose?”
She gasped again. “I would do no such thing!” She scanned the room. “Who told you such a lie?”
“It doesn’t matter who told me, but it isn’t the first time a patient with minor injuries has died on your table. With all our advancement in medical technology, how do you manage to allow someone to die?”
“There are always…complications…that I cannot foresee. The machines can only do so much.”
“The machines can do everything, but a skilled manipulator of the program can trick the system, and a suspected rebel as you, can dispose of any evidence—in this case: people.”
“I am no rebel! I was cleared!”
“The five patients who have died under your care were suspected rebels. Did they know about you? Were you afraid of being exposed? Is that why you killed them?”
She threw down some electronic device she had been holding and it shattered onto the floor. “I will not stand for this! I’m going to Avery!”
“You can go to the administrator all you like, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re under suspicion.”
“How would you know?”
He smiled. “I have my sources.”
“Outrageous!” She stomped off as much as she could with her soft shoes and burst of the room.
Victor turned to me. “Now, let me show you how our technology works.”
He was so calm.
“What just happened?”
He walked with me near the man. The patient cringed away, but Victor held up his hand as if there was nothing or no one to be feared. The man still cowered, in disbelief, but didn’t move from the bed.
“Dr. Eyre,” Victor began, “is a suspected rebel infiltrator. There aren’t many, but of course, they can cause damage to the Corporation from within. When the rebels are captured and if injured, we cure them, so that we can interrogate them at full health. We have a method of reading minds, not only with rebels, but with citizens as well, and every employee is subjected to random tests.”
I didn’t like the sound of that—reading minds.
“Can you read my mind?”
He smiled. “No, the machine isn’t calibrated to assess Stargazer anatomy.”
“But what if I’m part human?”
“We scanned you when you first arrived. The Separator couldn’t get a reading off of your mind. That’s why we were convinced you were an alien.”
“The Separator is a person or a machine?”
“It’s a machine.”
“Is it a large machine like the ones in here? And the one Medusa is connected to?”
Victor frowned. “No, it’s a very small machine, inserted into the subject’s ear.”
“You put something in my ear?!”
I tried to pull away from him, but it was impossible with the bond, and as much as I was disgusted, I didn’t try to use brute force. I didn’t want to be responsible for ripping his hand off.
“I didn’t!”
“Oh, and that makes it all right?”
“When you arrived, Dr. Goode presided over you. He administered the probe.”
I shivered. I couldn’t believe that I had trusted, even liked Dr. Goode. He was such a deceiver.
I touched the side of my head. “Is it still in there?”
“No, it was extracted.”
I rubbed my head and ear, as if I was trying to rub the horrid memory away of being probed, even though I didn’t remember what they’d done to me.
“What else was done to me?”
Victor shook his head. “This isn’t the place for that discussion.” He scanned the room, the doctors, with their curious eyes. “Besides, I don’t know everything. Dr. Goode would be more informative.”
I clenched my jaw. I didn’t want to see him ever again, yet I needed to know what he’d done to me.
“Then I want to see him.”
“Not right now, first, I need to look at your head.”
I shook my head frantically.
“Don’t worry.” He took his free hand and cupped my cheek. The others in the room gasped. He ignored them. “I won’t hurt you. I’m going to make you feel better.”
I didn’t know why, but I trusted his words. He had a very soothing voice that calmed me. I nodded.
“Good, now, let me show you how we heal.” He turned to the dazed man. “What happened?”
He hesitated and Victor gave him a stern look. The man began. “I-I fell on my arm.”
Victor shook his head. “No, you didn’t. You got into a fight, didn’t you?”
The man shook his head wildly. “No, no I didn’t. I fell.”
“What’s wrong with fighting?” I asked.
“It’s forbidden,” Victor replied, “but we all know there are underground fight clubs, right?”
“No-no there isn’t.”
Victor leaned in. “Of course, there is because I’ve been to one. You trick the surveillance system to think that it is in need of maintenance and when it shuts down, you start brawling.”
The man shook his head. “No-no, you’re wrong.” He looked around at the others. “I would never be disloyal to the Corporation.” Then he looked at Victor and smiled. “But you have by attending these so-called fight clubs. I should report you.”
Victor smiled back. “I was under the orders of Pallas.”
The man gasped.
“Oh, yes,” said Victor, “you should be more careful of who you allow into your secret club.”
The man leaned in closer to Victor and whispered, “What are you going to do?”
“I’m going to fix your arm and send you on your way.”
“You’re not going to report me?”
“No, I’m not. Pallas could have shut you down at any time and ordered your executions, but he has a reason for allowing your brutal entertainment.”
“Why?”
Victor shrugged. “I don’t question our leader. But know this: I could drum up some kind of false charge, and added with your illicit activities, you will most definitely pay the price.”
“W-what do you want from me?”
“I’ll ask you for a favor in the future and you will obey, do you understand?”
He nodded fervently. “Yes, yes, anything!”
“Good, now, let me see your arm.”
The man held it up willingly to be examined. Victor pushed a button at the side of the man’s bed and a hollow cylinder extended and rose up. He took the man’s arm, a little too roughly, and placed it inside the cylinder. Then he pushed some more buttons and there was a blue light that moved back and forth across his arm from inside the cylinder. The light stopped after a few seconds.
The man took out his arm and moved it with ease.
“Better?” asked Victor as he pushed a button and the cylinder moved and went back to its position at the side of the bed.
The man smiled. “Yes, much better.”
“Now, get the hell out of here.”
The man nodded and hurriedly got down from the bed and ran out of the room.
I was greatly distracted by everything. The man and his secret fight club—whatever that was—Victor being a spy for Pallas, and the incredible cylinder.
I asked Victor a safe question. “Did the cylinder heal the man’s broken bone?”
“Yes,” he replied with a smile. “Our technology is incredible, isn’t it?”
I smiled. “Yes, it is.”
“Of course, being a Stargazer, you wouldn’t know anything about suffering from a broken bone, unless you got into a brawl with another Stargazer.”
I shook my head at him. “Why do you call me a Stargazer? Don’t I possess human traits?”
“Yes, you do, but you’re more of a Stargazer than a human, and in our world, if you’re 99% Stargazer and 1% human, you’re still a Stargazer. The majority is superior to the minority. It’s only logical.”
When I didn’t reply, he went to the panel on the side of the bed and pushed a button. A red light from above scanned the bed.
“What did that do?”
“It sanitized the bed. I didn’t want you sitting where that man had sat. He had just come from the underground. It’s dirty down there.”
When he motioned for me to sit on the bed, I did, deciding it wasn’t the time to rebel. The bed was soft and comfortable.
I smiled. “I wish I had this in my cell.”
“Well, I could recommend your stay in the infirmary, but I don’t think that would go over too well.” He smiled weakly. “I have pull, but not that much pull.”
“Dr. Eyre was scared of you.”
He furrowed his brow. “Do you think?”
I nodded. “Is she really a rebel?”
“Her readings are inconclusive.”
“What does that mean?”
“When the machine can’t formulate an output—positive for deception and negative for loyalty—it shuts down—inconclusive.”
“If she’s suspected, then why is she still…?”
“Alive? Well, we are well aware that our machines aren’t foolproof. We’re not that delusional. But she is allowed to go about her day as usual, but she’s been implanted with a tracking device to monitor her movements.”
“Doesn’t everyone in the Corporation have a tracking device in them?”
He smiled. “You make us seem totalitarian.”
I shrugged. “If the shoe fits…”
He furrowed his brow. “I’ve never heard that expression. Is it Stellar?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know. It just seemed like the right thing to say after your statement.”
“Hmm, well, no, we don’t have such devices in our bodies.”
“Not that you know of. It seems to me that Pallas can do whatever he wants, being a maniacal warlord.”
There were loud gasps all around and the doctors who had been listening in on our conversation, backed away as if they didn’t want to be infected with our rebellious statements. There was one doctor, a male, tall and lanky with white hair, who didn’t shrink away. He actually took a step closer.
Victor noticed his proximity. “Back off Dr. Sherwood,” he warned him. “You’re not here to spy on us.” He nodded to a waking patient on the other side of the room. “Go tend to that woman over there.”
Dr. Sherwood hesitated, but then walked to the woman who looked pregnant. While he checked the machines around her, he would glance every so often at Victor and me.
“What was that about?” I asked Victor.
“Everyone in the Corporation is a spy. It’s disloyal to not spy on your fellow employee. Some like Dr. Sherwood are very…enthusiastic; others not so much.”
“But what if someone lies on someone else?”
“The Separator will sort them out.”
I shivered, thinking that that thing was inside my head, and John was behind it.
“But let’s forget about that,” he said softly. “Lie back.”
I did as he ordered, staring up at the dim white light above me. I closed my eyes. I could feel Victor’s free hand touching my head and the back of my neck. He was very gentle. A machine started to buzz behind me and my eyes flew open.
“Don’t worry,” he said softly, anticipating my reaction. “I’m going to get rid of the pain in your head.”
The machine blocked my eyes from the harsh light, but that didn’t make me feel any better about the situation. A green light, pulsing back and forth, ran along a curve of the black machine, as it hovered above my head. I couldn’t see Victor.
“What’s happening?” I asked, squeezing his hand.
“Don’t worry. We’re almost done.”
Then the green lights stopped and it fanned out, scanning my face.
“What now?”
He didn’t answer as the machine retracted. The white light was in my face again. He noticed my distress and shut the light off. I looked into his dark brown eyes.
“Are you in any pain?” he asked, gently touching my temple.
I shook my head. “No, the dull ache is gone.”
He smiled. “Good, now let’s tend to that bruise. Roll on your side please.”
I did as he asked, but since our hands were clasped, he came with me, and his arm was wrapped around my waist. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t nice either. I remembered Loren holding me and that was a more pleasant feeling. Victor was doing everything he could to make up for torturing me, but it just wasn’t enough.
Since my back was turned to him, I heard him open a drawer, or something to that effect, and then the drawer closed with a hiss. I heard something snap off and then after a second, his hand was on the back of my neck, rubbing some kind of cool ointment where Dr. Keller had injected me.
He kept rubbing and rubbing, although, I was sure, my neck, giving the advancement of medicine, was perfectly healed.
“Is it gone?” I asked.
“Almost,” he murmured.
After a few more seconds, his hand left mine, and I felt relieved. I rolled onto my back and looked at him. He was staring at me, wistfully. Yes, I could gauge that emotion from one male to one female that he was attracted to. He’d stared at me the same way while I’d taken my shower, but he’d been more excited in his reactions, although, he’d tried best to restrain himself, to stand there like a stone guard, watching me as I’d stood before him naked.
He quickly scanned my body with his eyes as I lay on the soft bed. I sat up very quickly.
“I’m better now.”
“Are you in a hurry to go back to your cell?” he asked, as if he already knew my answer.
“I don’t want to go back there, but where else am I to go?”
He looked around the room, at the spying eyes.
“C’mon,” he said and nearly pulled me off of the bed.