Stargazer by Melanie Matthews - HTML preview

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Chapter 5

 

There was a buzzing sound and Medusa reappeared.  “Doctor Valier, your time with the anomaly is up.”

He sighed and let me go. I felt very cold as he left me. He went to the screen where Medusa was still mechanically moving about and then turned to face me, his face fallen, sad.

“I’ll request for you a pair of shoes.”

“Thank you.”

Medusa disappeared, the screen turned back into the white wall, and then Loren walked through it—out—away from me. I leapt up and advanced to the wall, thinking it was still open somehow, but when I pressed my hands against it, I met a cold resistance. They had either locked access or I wasn’t allowed to leave, but others could enter. I wasn’t fully aware of their technology or of the Resistance, but it seemed very advanced. I wondered at the Stargazer technology. Surely, a race of aliens from another planet would be exceptionally advanced, right? 

I sat back down on my cold table, feeling the few spots of warmth where Loren and I had sat previously. I scooted over to where he had sat, desiring to be near him. I didn’t know if I loved him, because I barely knew him, but he made me feel somewhat safe, even though I knew he was limited in influence. I also desired to see John. I felt a strong lure to him as well. He had been comforting, even though back in that large room, he had me put back under restraints. He said he did it to protect me.  Back then I thought Loren would have never done that, but now, after leaving me in this prison cell, I knew that he didn’t have a lot of authority when it came to me—the anomaly. He was allowed only so much. I feared for him. He had rebel technology, which was most likely, punishable by death. Even being the president’s nephew couldn’t elicit a stay in my execution. Just by being with Senator’s Noon’s daughter, in that way, close to the president’s statue, was enough for the Red Woman to get him sentenced to clean up detail, although, it seemed to me a light punishment. I had never seen the statue, but I would prefer cleaning the gunk off of that if it meant I never had that horrible black liquid injected in me by Dr. Keller. 

I looked over at the half empty coffee cup Loren had placed on my table. The coffee was black too. I picked the cup up, and stared at the pitch black dark liquid inside. It still smelled good, but not as much as before. I took another sip. It was cold and I could taste more of the sugar. I smiled. I didn’t ask for sugar. Loren must have ordered it that way, probably reflecting his own preference for how he liked his coffee. I remembered his remark about John; about how he didn’t like the hot beverage—how he might be a Stargazer—joking, of course. I got the feeling that he was trying to dissuade me from John, to separate us, because maybe, Loren wanted me to give my attention only to him. It was jealousy. Did Loren like me? Did John? Why should they? I was a freak.  I was the enemy. 

I drank down the rest of the cold coffee and placed the cup on a small table next to my large table—meant to be my bed. Then I lay down and stretched my legs out. But I became cold and pulled them in, mimicking an unborn child in a mother’s womb. I didn’t remember having a mother or a father, but I knew that every child, even if their parents weren’t around, existed, once upon a time, to create them. I was created. Where were my parents? Did I have any siblings? Were they looking for me? Did they even care?    

I hugged myself, shivering, trying not to cry. After a little while, at the foot of my table, a white panel opened and out came a metal tray with a blue blanket on it. I smiled, thinking, hoping it was Loren, who urged someone out there to be compassionate to my needs. I snatched up the blanket and let it drown me from head to toe. I began to relax, feeling warm, as my legs stretched, and I closed my eyes, entering a black world of blissful sleep.

***

If I were a Stargazer, then I had the same bodily needs and requirements as humans, so in the middle of the night or day—I didn’t know that time it was—I had to go to a privy. 

“Are you there Medusa?” I called out.

The white wall turned black as the screen appeared. 

“Yes?” she replied.

I sat up on the table, keeping the blanket around me. It was still so cold in here. Either they were trying to punish me by keeping it cold, or they thought since I could be a Stargazer, that I would prefer the cold, as the aliens preferred cold foods. Well, I wasn’t a Stargazer in that respect, and I was freezing.

“I need to go to the restroom.”

“I understand. At attendant will be with you shortly.”

“Thank you.”

Medusa tilted her head to the side. “You are welcome.”

I didn’t know what that meant. She could have received information through one of her tubes in her head, or maybe she was just confused that I was being nice to her. There was no point in being rude to her. She hadn’t done anything to me. She was compliant like all Corporate workers probably were. John, Loren, and even Victor Jamison to a certain extent, were a bit rebellious. 

“Who will be the attendant?”

“That is still being decided.”

“Will it be a man?”

“Do you want to request a man?”

“Well, I’m kind of scared of women right now, but I don’t want to do what I have to do…around a man.”

Even though I was comfortable with John and Loren, I didn’t want them to see me go to the restroom.

“I will make a recommendation for you.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“I can recommend. Ultimately, your attendant will be whomever the presiding physician deems appropriate.”

“And who is my presiding physician?”

“President Pallas.”

I gasped. “The president is a doctor?”

“The Beneficial One is everything.”

“What’s his expertise?”

“He is an expert in everything.”

I sighed, realizing Medusa was probably coded to worship Julius Pallas. 

“I understand, but if you could help me out, I would appreciate it.”

“How may I help you?”

“I want an attendant who is nice.”

“Nice?”

“By nice I mean, friendly, warm, compassionate, and someone who doesn’t want to torture me.”

“I am scanning employee files now.”

Medusa tilted her head every which way, pushing buttons—accessing information. Finally, she stopped moving and faced me. “I have located a suitable attendant. Would you like to see her information?”

“Yes, okay.”

The screen split and Medusa was pushed to the left. On the right was a photo of a young female with brown hair in curls, and a nice smile on her face. Her name was Henrietta.

“Is she a doctor?”

“No, she is a slave.”

“Oh, that’s wrong! I can’t have someone forced into helping me!”

Although, given the structure of the Corporation, I wasn’t surprised at them having slaves, but it was still a shock.

“Slaves are vital to Sanctuary,” Medusa told me. “They relish the opportunity to serve.”

I shook my head, unsure. “I don’t know, Medusa.”

“Is she insufficient to your needs?”

“What would she help me do?”

“She would do whatever you required of her.”

I didn’t like the sound of that. “Are there any alternative attendants?”

She tilted her head some more and then said, “There is one available who is authorized to attend to your needs.”

“Who is it?”

“Doctor Victor Jamison.”

I shook my head vigorously. “That is the last person who is going to help me go to the restroom.”

“Am I correct in assuming you would prefer the slave, Henrietta?”

“She’s nice, right?”

“She is required to act in any manner you desire.”

I didn’t want to force a girl to help me to the restroom, but I didn’t want Victor, who acted nice, but kept pumping me full of that black liquid. I should’ve known Pallas wouldn’t have made John or Loren my attendants.

“Okay, can you recommend her?”

“I have already sent the information to President Pallas.”

“Why? Did you know what my decision would be?”

“I recognized your distress when I mentioned Doctor Victor Jamison.”

“Can you…feel?”

“I am a machine. I do not feel.”

“But if I’m a Stargazer, how do I express human emotions?”

“You are the anomaly.”

“Can you figure me out?”

“I cannot.”

“What are you?”

“I am a citizen of Sanctuary, an employee of the Corporation, and the responsive interface to computer queries, provided to ensure a more acceptable appeal to mankind.”

“What are those tubes in your head?”

“They are cables allowing the rapid flow of information.”

“Do they hurt?”

“I feel no pain.”

“Are you an alien?”

“I am a machine with a humanoid appearance.”

“Stargazers look humanoid, don’t they?”

“Yes, except for the distinction of lavender hair and eyes.”

I ran my fingers though my hair. It was soft and full. I wondered what my face looked like.

“Why do Stargazers have such features?”

“It is in their biological makeup.”

“What planet are they from?”

“That information has yet to be determined.”

“Does the Corporation have the ability to travel in space?”

“I am not authorized to answer that question.”

“Okay, does the Corporation have the knowledge to travel in space?”

I wondered if I could trick her like Loren did with Protocol 19-82.

“No, they do not. Excuse me, EHAE-01-23-3013-A, but I am being requested elsewhere.  Goodbye.”

“Wait! Is Henrietta coming?”

Medusa was gone and the wall was white again. I waited and waited, desperately needing to use the restroom, when finally the buzzing sound reappeared and someone walked through the wall. To my relief, it was Henrietta, and not Victor.

She held her head down, wearing a dress like me, but it was dark gray. Her full brown curls almost covered her face. I noticed her eyes were dark, possibly brown like her hair. 

“What is your command?” she asked in a soft voice.

“I don’t want to command you. I just need to go to the restroom. Can you help me?”

She lifted her head with furrowed brows, confused. “I was told you were different than other Stargazers.”

“Aren’t you afraid of me?”

“Yes, but it’s my duty to serve, whether it’s a human or an alien.”

“Have you served aliens before?”

“A year ago, I was confined in a prison cell with one.”

“Why?”

“They wanted to see how the Stargazer would react to me.”

“What happened?”

“We mated.”

“That’s unbelievable!” I sat down on the table, feeling sick. “Did you get pregnant?”

“Yes.”

“What happened to the child?”

“At birth, it was taken from me.”

“Did you know if it was a girl or a boy?”

“They didn’t tell me. The fetus was taken to a lab to be studied.”

I felt even sicker. 

“Who was the presiding doctor?”

“There were two: Dr. Elliott Hinder and Dr. John Goode.”

I almost vomited. John had been an accomplice in the experimentation on a child! It was too much to bear! I looked at Henrietta. She seemed so calm. 

“Are you not upset at losing your child? What they made you go through?”

“I serve the Corporation. How can I serve you?”

“Can you just show me the restroom and I’ll go by myself?”

“That’s not authorized. I have to attend to you.”

“Okay, so, where is it?”

Henrietta approached me, less timid than I would have imagined her to behave. She held out her hand. I took it and there was that same magnetized feeling again, not only to the table I had been confined to in the white room, but also when John held me when I struggled to free myself.   

I tried to shake my hand loose, but it was attached to hers like glue.

“We are bonded now,” she explained.

“What does that mean?”

“Everyone I go, you go.”

“But what if I make a run for it?”

“There are guards posted everywhere. If you love as you claim, you wouldn’t endanger my life as well, because I would be caught in the crossfire. Even if my life ended, it wouldn’t matter. I’m just a slave. I serve the Corporation in life and death.”

“Henrietta…”

“What?”

I shook my head. I couldn’t make her see that everything she believed in was wrong. 

“Let’s go.”

Instead of us walking through the wall, it slid open like a door. When we walked out, holding hands, I noticed my cell was just one of hundreds upon hundreds, on different levels, spiraling up to the ceiling. I couldn’t see anyone side, but there were guards walking, patrolling.  I was on the lowest level and there were more guards here. They were faceless men with hatred in their eyes. A few smiled, looking down at us holding hands. I guessed Henrietta and I were an amusing spectacle. We walked down a long white hallway, passing several closed doors. Finally, we reached the end, and a door labeled PRIVY. I felt embarrassed as Henrietta held my hand while I did my business. I noticed a shower in the room as well. I realized I hadn’t had a bath in awhile.

“Henrietta, do I stink?” I asked, nodding towards the shower.

“You could use a bath.”

“Can we become unstuck?”

“I can get in the shower with you.”

“No, no! I want to shower alone.”

“It’s not permitted.”

“How am I supposed to clean myself attached to you?”

“I can clean you.”

“Again, no, I want to clean myself. Well, I guess I’ll just have to stink around everyone.”

“The Stargazers don’t care if their smell bothers others.”

“Well, I guess I’m not a Stargazer.”

“But you have other attributes.”

I sighed. “Yeah, I don’t know why.”

“You act human.” She smiled. “You have…personality.” She furrowed her brow. “But more like a rebel than a resident of Sanctuary.” 

“Well, thanks, I guess.” 

I took another whiff of myself. I really did stink. 

“Medusa, are you there?” I called out.

The restroom mirror became a black screen and Medusa appeared.

“Yes?”

“I want to bathe. Can Henrietta and I be unstuck?”

“I will check.”

Medusa tilted her head and pushed buttons as usual. Finally, she said, “You may bathe, but a different attendant is required.”

“Who is it?” I asked, afraid to know.

“Doctor Victor Jamison.”

I grunted. “Why is he my alternative attendant?”

“President Pallas has decreed that if you are to bathe, Doctor Victor Jamison is to be your attendant.”

I shook my head in disbelief. Pallas was trying to humiliate me. He must believe I was human.

“Will Dr. Jamison and I be bonded?”

“If you desire, but no, it is not required.”

“How close will he be to me?”

“You are allowed to bathe while he supervises.”

“What about privacy?”

“It is not authorized.”

“Fine,” I said, angry. “Please see to it that Dr. Jamison supervises my bath.”

As we waited, I said to Henrietta, “Sorry, I’m not pushing you out, but I’m not going to let them think they know me, because they don’t.”

The truth was I didn’t know myself. Perhaps before all of this, I did this sort of thing—defied people—rebelled.

“If that is your wish,” said Henrietta.

“You can go back to whatever it was that you were doing.”

“I was in the service of President Pallas.”

“What do you do for him?”

“I read to him.”

I was shocked. “You read to him?”

Henrietta nodded. “He likes poetry.”

“Can’t he read?”

“He likes it when I do.”

I shook my head, confused by this poetry-loving dictator. The door to the privy opened and Victor walked in with a smirk on his face and a pair of white shoes.

“Loren said he would bring them,” I told Victor.

“Well, he was on his way, but I stopped him, told him that you needed me to supervise your bath and it only made sense that I would bring you some shoes.”

I was sure Loren didn’t like that plan at all, but it seemed Victor was above him in superiority.

Victor laid the shoes on the counter and turned to Henrietta. “You may go now.”

Henrietta nodded and her hand easily slipped from mine. Before she left, she turned to me and said, “Goodbye.”

I sensed she was a little sad.

“Bye,” I told her, sad too.

She left and Victor closed the door. A red line appeared to show it was locked. “Well, well, let’s get started.”

I looked at the shower. There was no curtain to block me from his eyes. I turned so that my back was to him. I took off my dress, folded it, and laid it down on the counter, next to my shoes. I dared to look at my body and noticed it looked human. I took another glance at the bathroom mirror. Before, when I first arrived to the restroom, I had taken a quick glance, and noticed eyes, a nose, lips, and everything else that was deemed human, but now, I really took a hard look. 

My eyes were lavender, as they said. It matched my hair. I had lavender eyebrows too. My nose was small and my lips were full and pink. I stuck out my tongue. It was pink. 

I turned to Victor, naked, and said, “My tongue is pink, if you wanted to know.”

He didn’t respond. He just stared at me. I noticed his eyelids were drooped as if he was tired, but his breathing picked up. His chest was heaving. He licked his top lip. I didn’t know a lot, but it seemed Victor was very attracted to me. I felt sick. He was not the man I wanted to attract. I thought John was nice, but after hearing that he presided over the experimentation of a half-Stargazer, half-human baby, I was sickened by him. I liked Loren, but I didn’t want him attending my bath. I’d rather have Victor, who I hated.

I turned from him and stepped into the shower. There was a panel with buttons, but I didn’t know which ones to push. 

“Medusa, which one starts the shower?”

I only heard her voice. “I can activate it, if you wish.”

“Oh, please do.”

“At what temperature would you like the water?”

“Ah, I don’t know, how about not too cold, not too hot?”

The water gushed out and it was perfect. I moaned out in delight.

“Thank you, Medusa.”

“You are welcome. Will you need soap?”

“Yes, please.”

“Which scent would you like?”

“What are the options?”

“There are honey, vanilla, strawberry, and rose.”

“You mean, rose like the flower?”

“Yes.”

“Do you have lavender?”

“Lavender is forbidden.”

“I thought so. What about with garments?”

“That is also forbidden.”

“And the color purple?”

“That is allowed.”

“That makes no sense.”

“It is the law.”

“Sounds like a stupid law to me.”

“Are you ready to pick a particular soap?”

“Uh, how about, rose?”

“You might want to close your eyes.”

That wasn’t Medusa. I turned to see Victor, still staring at me from the door. He wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t brooding. He was just staring at me. 

“Why?” I asked.

He took a step forward and then stopped, placing his hands in his pants pockets. 

“It comes out in a mist.”

I looked at the panel and saw numbers, counting down. When it got to one, I shut my eyes like Victor suggested. The mist came out, smelling of roses, all over my face, my hair and my body. Although I felt like I had just been sneezed on, I did feel cleaner as the soap did its job. The water continued to flow, washing the soap off. Steam was all around me and flowing out to the room.  I could see Victor in a haze of white. 

“Are you finished?” he asked.

I would’ve spent hours in that shower, but I didn’t want him gawking at me anymore. Apparently, he didn’t want to stare at me anymore either.   

“Yes,” I replied. “Medusa shut the water off please.”

The water instantly stopped and I took my hair, squeezing out as much water as I could. When the steam dissipated, I saw Victor, standing near me, with a white towel, open for me. I stepped out of the shower and went to take the towel, but he pulled it back.

“Allow me.”