9
ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BRIDGE
If I could erase one day in my life, it would be, without a doubt, the morning after my confession. The magician was distant, and his facial expressions, gestures and attitudes denoted a great contempt for me, at least so I thought. In the early hours of that morning, Leonardo had collected most of the things to continue the journey. The horses were not there. Then, I felt an infinite solitude, that same infinite loneliness that drains the speaking from the hearts and souls. Well, I picked up my words and kept them under the guise of my shame. Leonardo’s eyes, so beloved by me, were now accusing me and were the symbol of a fault that I had never felt, and suffocated me and tortured me, clutching my entrails and put me in the jungle of regrets. What color is the remorse? Good question, I cannot answer! Because being an abstract feeling it is not given to humans to see with our physical eyes the nuances so horrendous that they should have; which would make us run, terrified, as if a mountain wolf would be eaten our ankles. Ah! But... certainly for the eyes of the soul, it is another thing... deprived as they are of the prison of the flesh, nothing is hidden before it; scouring the depths of consciousness to deploy, in its entire monstrosity, the ferrous nuances of regrets. In that hidden place of feelings, there is no place for pretenses or lies; everything is shown in its essence, in other words, just as it is. So, I was before Leonardo’s eyes just as I am; as if his physical eyes and the eyes of his soul were leaving me naked in the vastness of my lies. Four eyes were so many eyes to look at me; and to the overuse of eyes joined also the scarcity of his words, this inconsistency in eyes and words made me feel as a scrapped, contemptible and unworthy human being.
It was Leonardo who interrupted this diet of silence.
-We have to walk and follow another path. The bridge to Borloux is taken. I sent the horses back since it made no sense to take them with us.
And while thus he spoke, took two backpacks, threw one to me and the other settled on his back, then walked toward the dense forest, with a small machete that was holding in his right hand and began to curtail those shrubs, small and weak, that stood in our way.
-Is it possible for you to use magic to get us out of here?
Leonardo continued cutting mount and shrubs with a machete, with a brusqueness as accurate movement, plants fell sprawled on either side of the road, leaving behind us a vegetal carpet. When listening to my question, he stopped and turned to reply:
-At the very moment I use my magic, they will know exactly where we are. I cannot afford they discover I had something to do with your getaway.
For a good listener, few words. The rest of the way I kept quiet, just like him. We had walked a long time and I was exhausted. However, I did not dare to ask him to stop for resting. The heat was grueling, sweat ran down my body sticking to my clothes; the sound of insects coming in search of a good bite sounded in my ears. My face was red by the pumped blood from the heart to my cheeks. Leonardo continued cutting shrubs without question and seemed as fresh as a lettuce. Finally, the torture ceased.
We arrived to a stream whose waters jumping in choir from a gigantic rock, very high, were singing a melody while the crystalline liquid was downing the summit, full of harmony and freshness. After landing they joined to a small lake such a foam spring, serene and shy, which watched with envy the prowess of these intrepid waters. On the other side of the lake, there was only greenery, as large and vast as fields of a golf camp. The sun illuminated the lake giving it silver and iridescent sparkles.
-Hallelujah! -I screamed at the time I blew the heavy backpack on the grass and threw me into the warm waters with my cloth on. The lake received me with joy and freshness.
In those waters, my regrets were diluted. I admitted without shame: in the transparent fluid, I swam, jumped over, as if I were one of the very sylphs. I had forgotten the sweet that was being caressed by the tender and warm waters of a lake. I was particularly impressed by the harmony of the place.
For his part, Leonardo, far from losing control, like I did, he stayed accommodating the backpacks in a safe place, away from the water; joined a little wood to start a fire, and when everything was in order, he finally approached the water to cool off.
I was euphoric, and with so much joy and so much water, I was not prepared to let me influenced by the aloofness of the magician. I went to where he was and asked him:
-Are you human? Didn’t you want cool water? We could have prepared everything as soon as we finished.
The magician decided to clarify his attitude and replied:
-It gets dark very fast here. It is preferable to leave everything in order now that we have light than at night when there is nothing cleared.
I approached as much as I could toward him, so close, that I could kiss him if I wanted it, but I repressed the impulse.
-Are you always so controlled? -I asked.
-Always! -It was his response.
-Have you ever felt the desire to get out of the rut and do something crazy?
-Not! Never!
I looked at him with anger:
-That is a lie! Everyone feels a desire to do something out of the ordinary from time to time; even wise men.
He looked at me with a cunning gleam and added:
-Ah! Then that's what you did in Saint Andre when you kissed me.
Oh! I had to admire the Leonardo’s subtlety to bring up the subject to collation with such delicacy. What ability and what skill he had! What great adversary turned out to be Leonardo! It was low blow! I did not expect it! I knew that at some point I should explain my behavior; but not there, not that way. He caught me decentralized and without justifications. Fulminated my courage, I just had the attack for defense:
-That was because I was about to die and at that time I thought it was a good idea -I said trying to seem airy and splashing the water lightly with my hands trying to get away from him.
But Leonardo knew how to read people's souls and, especially, mine, and was not willing to let pass the opportunity to annoy me and continued with his verbal attacks:
-Tell me, Camila did you like the kiss? Because I must tell you that you took by surprise and... The truth is... I don't know if I did a good job.
For my part, I did not have even the gift of reading faces and couldn't get away from the place because Leonardo, anticipating my movement, had taken me by the hands and I had to stand there in front of him, sunk in the water and in the commiseration, trying to thread the precise words that explained that strange behavior. It is a thankless task that of threading phrases or sentences to justify the inexplicable actions! If I did not even understand why I behaved that way; much less I could explain to a third party the cause of such behavior. Don't get me wrong! It wasn’t that I didn’t have the answer to that question; it was an easy one. In my mind I had already responded to that question many times:
"Yes, Leonardo, you did an excellent job, the most excellent job with that kiss. The Excellency of your kiss haunts me day and night, and awakes me insomniac imagining how to continue stealing the caresses of your lips. You are asking if you did a good job? Oh! Without a doubt, so it was! Undisputed, so it was! And if it weren’t for your indigo eyes, cold like the waters of a wasteland, glacial as the icebergs of the French Pyrenees, wild as the Amazon jungle sinking deep in the South America, long time ago I would have hung around your neck for snatch your kisses which are the longings of my soul."
While thinking, another voice bounced and resounded to the hidden corners of my head, rising like a shadow and imparting her teachings on morality: it was the Severa’s voice regurgitating axioms and aphorisms about morality on decent ladies and good manners:
"But what forms of expression are those, Miss?" You don't know that a lady never expressed her thoughts in front of any gentleman. It is preferable to talk less than more and, when in doubt, it is always best to reach for modesty. Prestige preservation is the only guarantee for a faultless reputation. Any decent young lady would never speak of neither kissing nor eyes"
It was then that I decided to hide my indecency for the rescue of morality and dismissed all thoughts that involved kissing or eyes; and with extreme subtlety, I tried to divert the response against-attacking with another question:
-And what about Duprina? your psychopathic, shameless and boring girlfriend, that instead of honoring her role as tutor and teach me the magic for which she was selected, has been dedicated to enchant me with skulls spells in solitary cemeteries and in the light of the moon?
The wizard looked at me with surprise. Certainly he did not expect my answer and for a few moments I felt like a winner in this contest of wills and characters, but, as I have said before, in the issues of eloquences Leonardo is a well-trained opponent and quickly regained his composure and with much intelligence and audacity was able to thread his question with mine and articulated:
-Duprina, which by the way is not my girlfriend, never knew of the kiss you gave me, therefore I doubt that she had any reason to bewitch you with black magic, as you say. And given that at that time, you stole me a kiss; I don't see why I should deprive to steal one from you. So, in this way, we will be even -and saying this he approached me, so close, that I was able to hear the sound of his breathing.
And although within my head, both Ño Josefina’s and Severa’s cries echoed with all their pristine ethical foundations of decency, composure and integrity; I, always averse towards everything that meant obedience, duty or imposition, disobeying the mandates of awareness, self-consciousness, and common sense, and plunged my lips again as a sailor in search of fresh water. Ah! And it is that the mouth of Leonardo is not any mouth, not. And well it was worth the moral deafness that I held. And neither Severa nor Ño Josefina, of having been in present body, could have been able to dissuade me to renounce to those lips that were the gates to heaven, not. Oh! What bliss! What happiness are the sharing of the sweet fruits of love which are the kisses; as well as Ulysses and Penelope, as Paris and Helena, as Orpheus and Eurydice, as well as them, Leonardo and I. Difficult it would be to describe the emotion of the moment, a soft breeze caressed the surface of the serene lake forming faint waves which joined with the white foam of the singing brook; the taste of fresh water from Leonardo’s lips melted with mine under the bright rays of a sun that descended from the heights to fall upon our bodies buried in the serenity of those vibrant waters. And so we followed until the irruption of voices coming from the outskirts which made us understand that someone was approaching.
We interrupted, then, the delights of the kiss and immediately reached the shore. There, the magician told me with signs to hide in a part of the forest where the vegetation was very lumpy and thick. I replied that I would not go anywhere without him and that probably that site would be full of unpleasant creatures, insects and vermin, waiting of a live body like mine, to suck my blood like vampires.
However, the magician vehemently expressed he had no time for nonsense, so, with much emphasis on his words, uttered the following order:
-Hide already! I don't have time for trifles. They are not looking for me but you. Go away! Go already!
Judging by the tone of his voice, I considered obeying his order and running towards the place that he had indicated me. I hid in such a way that I could see Leonardo on the distance. He was sitting on a very smooth rock and acted as if he were on the verge of igniting a fire consisting of hollow trunks, termite-eaten, grouped in the form of a lump, to heat his dinner.
Soon a group of five guard soldiers appeared in the clearing. One of them, the senior, approached Leonardo and greeted him warmly. I watched the scene from a distance, they were talking, but I could not hear their words clearly.
On the other hand, as I had predicted, an ant’s army was extended as carpet at my feet and an equal number of mosquitoes flying by weeds and crashing against my face and body. Before this brutal attack of nature I felt the need to stand up and hide myself somewhere else, but I sensed that the slightest movement would highlight my presence. In order to solve the contingency, keep capped my mouth with my two hands to avoid emitting an involuntary cry if the case. Then I tried to get up and walk away from the critters tangle that wanted me for dinner; but a stone in the way complicated my maneuver and I crashed right on the ground with a dry and dismal movement.
I immediately heard the guards ran to where I was and began to probe the area. One of them approached so much to me that I could see his boots at my face level. However, he seemed not to see me. Leonardo approached and tried to convince them he had seen a goat prowling the vicinity since last night and that surely it was the cause of the commotion. After a while of search and not finding anything, they decided to accept the theory of the magician lost goat and came to the fire, which was already on, to rest before restarting the search. Thus, sitting all around the flames, cooking some sausages taken off a few cans, they talked with the wizard about the girl who had escaped from the village and had to catch.
-Why are you after her? -asked Leonardo pretending curiosity.
One of the guards replied:
-For fraud. She lied in her application to be accepted as an apprentice witch. The situation is delicate. Americus is being questioned by the Board, for being the sponsor of the young apprentice. Meanwhile, a member of the Council of Elders is taking charge of Government while your father faces the complaint.
When he heard the name of his father, Leonardo paid more attention.
-My father, is he ok?
The Guard rushed to reassure him:
-Yes, there is nothing that can make against him due to his rank, but for now he is no longer head of the Government.
-Who is in place?
-Tiarano, one of the elders of The Ciudadela, who had been transferred to Eisenbaum recently. He promoted the temporary removal of Americus while the matter is resolved. However -and then he whispered to Leonardo, with a voice that was barely a whisper so that his companions could not hear him, said- I think that is a ruse to take your father from the road. What happened does not keep proportion with the failure. On another occasion, he had just gotten enough with an explanatory and nothing more.
The wizard scowled.
-I share your opinion. Tiarano is one of Zoroastro’s disciples and had been trying since long to take possession of any of the Government positions from the wizards and witches settlements that are in the hands of the brotherhood. Eisenbaum was the last towns missing to have total control. They now govern all settlements.
The guard looked at him with concern.
- And now what awaits us?
-Knowing Zoroastro I would dare to say that nothing good.
-We have received order to remove heaven and earth to find the girl. Isn't it strange? So many resources to find an apprentice who has not even finished her teaching? This is odd, if it were up to me I would leave her. Don't you think? Why they want her?
From my place of detention I also wondered: "Yes, why they want me?
-I don't know –said the magician- I don't know.
While they were talking, I was still lying on the damp ground, very close to the soil where I could see the furrows made by those watery and transparent creatures that inhabit almost every corner of the planet, so disgusting, that are earthworms. Whatever the biologists say! Without detracting from the laudable work of these creatures that scholars praise for their role at Earth; making it suitable for farming, loosening roots and compressing soil, by fertilizing the land, and if this were not enough, as ultimate sacrifice, they serve as food to birds, mammals and reptiles; the truth is, it must be said, that nature behaved with them as a cruel tyrant when it comes to lavish her gifts. If you see closely to a worm, as I saw it while I was in that uncomfortable position, you will realize that it's a "chubby middle line walking". They do not have eyes, no legs, no mouth, and is very difficult to distinguish what is front and what is back. At least, without disrespecting the opinion of biologists in this regard, that was my appreciation at that time: without grace, very ugly without glamour. Prowling the same ecosystem a few brown grasshoppers were also jumping from there to here, as if they were lost, unable to find their way back home, and clutching a tiny little spider entangled in its own web.
In other words, there were worms, spiders, mosquitoes, grasshopper and all kinds of unimaginable creatures; flying or crawling all over in that piece of land that had become my prison. Ants returned to the attack and were trying to get on my clothes. I had to repel them constantly with sudden movements, hoping that my attempts were silent. Mosquitoes for its part also joined this biological battle and went whizzing by my ears with the fury of a twin-engine airplane.
In the distance I saw Leonardo, quiet, conversing happily with the guards, as I lay on the moisture of the Earth, exhausted of so much biology, so much ecosystem and mosquitoes. Suddenly it crossed my mind that the guards, maybe, decided to spend the night there and a huge panic started to take over me. What if that happened? What would I do? I began to shivering cold since my clothes were wet by the bath in the lake. Fire, in the distance, emitted hot flashes and I could hear the sound of the stems singeing; and I felt the immense desire of being huddled by its hot flashes.
One of the guards walked away from the group and walked in my direction. For a moment I hold my breath. He apparently intended to urinate and then I began to pray to God that the urine thread coming had a different path from my head. Seconds later, apparently, the mercy of the Lord heard my request and the guard walked away a stretch beyond and there, ditches!, released the thread. That was it! The situation was unsustainable!
If Leonardo did not come to my aid in a few minutes, I would get up and walked closer to the fire, and only God knows how to solve the conflict. Fortunately, this was not necessary because as soon as the individual emptied his bladder and the pants were accommodated, the other guards stood up and enlisted for leaving.
As soon as they were gone, Leonardo approached my lair and helped me lifting and shaking the ants to the ground. I was so cold, paralyzed, that the words were numb and remained jammed in my mouth. So I had a lot to claim him for leaving me alone in the bush for so long, but the only thing that my body and tongue were doing was shivering. Then, the wizard took off his overcoat and placed it on my body. I was lifted up into the air, something very timely since my legs refused to respond, and I quickly was placed near the fire. Leonardo very cleverly fueled the fire with two trunks of the surroundings; this immediately seized power and begins to frantically dance. He came to me with the backpack and said:
-Remove your wet clothing and change.
I turned red by modesty and said.
-I can not do that!
-Why not?
-Because you are here.
The magician, fun at the situation, stepped to the edge of the lake, covered his eyes, and shouted:
-Now I'm not there, so please change your cloth or you're going to catch pneumonia.
I took some clothes of the backpack; and changed as quickly as I could.
-Now can I open my eyes? -He cried after a while.
-Yes, you can.
Back, we sat on a tree and he handled me a cup with brandy.
-Drink -he ordered- it will warm you up.
After the nasty potion tasted with Severa, I feared that this was another worst-tasting.
-What is it? -I asked while sipping a tiny portion of the liquid tasting its flavor.
-Brandy: a cordiality gift from our beloved guard.
As it toured my throat, the liquid was producing a burst of heat, the same as if you were swallowing a piece of the fire that burned. I, who was awake enough to recognize the benefits of good liquor, held the cup affectionately.
Leonardo seemed satisfied with my response, then added:
-I will leave for a few moments to look for some dry shrubs to revive the bonfire. What we have it is not enough for the night. Do you promise you will behave well?
A huge smile sailed my face.
-I promise -was my only answer.
As soon as Leonardo left, I served a little more of the fire amber liquid that was in the bottle. I sipped a small volume at the beginning, but in the end, I increased the flow rate of the drink. At first I was cold but some minutes later I began to feel a strange and pleasant drowsiness similar to joy. And since joy is something very precious to have, I continued pouring small amounts of this joy in my bulky cup. But, seconds later, not seeing the need to waste time serving it in the cup, I started taking it directly from the bottle. Because what was the point in wasting time? Best from the bottle to the mouth! And the more I drank, the more I felt the urgency of singing and be happy. But here's a bizarre event: the words of my mind were not equal to those that came out of my mouth. The words, so thin and articulated in my mind, came to resound as distorted by a prism which afforded them a tombstone resonance to my phrases and sentences; until the tone turned serious and irregular as a soprano attacked by a winter cold. Then the fire figures began to jump by the bushes, doing stunts and antics, which made me laugh so much as if I were in a circus.
When Leonardo arrived, instead of one, I saw two Leonardos; and it was very difficult for me to focus my eyes on any of them, because they jointly moved as if they were twins. Very surprised was the magician to see how little of the amber liquid remained in the bottle.
-Did you drink the whole bottle? I cannot turn my back because you surrender to drink?
I was laughing for all the things moving around me, equal to a fair merry-go-round; even Leonardo, looked like forming part of this objects carousel that danced by the surroundings.
The two Leonardos approached and took forcibly the bottle from my hands and threw it out to the fire. I tried to get up to stop him from doing this but it was too late. The flames covered the bottle and I didn't have enough balance to keep me standing; so trying to get up, the weight of my body succumbed to the effects of gravity and I fell backwards, landing back on the wet earth that had previously received me roughly. I stayed there a while until the magician rescued me, since I had no forces to stand on my own.
From afar I heard Leonardo’s’ voices scrubbing in my face his vapid reprimands; but my spirit intoxicated by the brandy ethyl fumes exalted my mood for the alcoholic beverage, and I could little elucidate the coherence of his words.
Yes, I have to conclude that this was one of the most shameful episodes of my life; and the reason I left for good the bad habit of tasting, with so much pleasure, the alcoholic beverages. At present, and in strictly necessary cases in which by social conventions it is mandatory to savor ethyl concoctions, the most I taste is a passion fruit juice or a tamarind infusion, in order to preserve the honor and integrity of my reputation.
At that time, my only audience was Leonardo and as good gentleman, has refrained so far, commenting on my dishonorable conduct.
The next morning the hangover awarded me with a blunt headache; those that seem that an African tribe had entered clandestinely in our eardrums, accompanied by drums and timbales playing together at the same time an unchained melody. Leonardo had already collected all our stuff and was waiting that I was awaken to continue our path. He seemed willing to forget what happened and spoke with great confidence:
-Are you ready to continue? -He asked me at the time that handed me a giant cup of coffee, black and very loaded and, then, in son of derision, he continued:
- I am sorry not to have that drink you like so much, but I'm afraid that you finished it all yesterday.
I drank the coffee without question; in order to save me the shame and got up to continue the journey. We crossed the lake; on the other side it was a landscape of long extensions colored in different shades, and in the background, spotted on the greenery I observed a few brown squares of ploughed land ready to receive seeds to harvest. The thick forest was left behind, now it only remained the green plains.
-How long would it take us to get to Bourloux? -I dared to ask.
-About an hour. We still have to cross the plain and then we’ll see a small forest bordering Bourlox Bridge and would have to wait for the night to cross it. We will go through in the northern part, which is where the water is higher and there is less monitoring. I have friends who will be waiting for us and will provide us a vehicle to take you home.
I looked at him with anxiety:
-Is it dangerous?
He smiled to encourage me:
-No, if you do what I tell you and follow my instructions.
After a while, we reached a wooded place from where I could see the bridge connecting Bourlox to Eisenbaum. There were eight guards stationed at the end of the viaduct; with their regulatory uniforms, red with golden gallons, and large boots to his knees; they were tall and handsome boys that were requiring documentation to all who passed from Bourlox to Eisenbaum and vice versa.
-Will wait until nine o'clock to cross -the magician repeated.
I looked at the river. It was very deep and plentiful; its water, surely, very cold. We will soak getting to the other side. However, the presence of Leonardo gave me warmth and courage. The minutes elapsed until it was nine o'clock. Leonardo took me by the arm and told me:
-It's time!
I got up silently and followed him to the shore. On the bridge there were five guards, entertaining in smoking and talking. At this point of the night no one already crossed the bridge. In silence, the magician entered the waters, and I did behind him. The coldness of the water received me as if electricity current was striking me down the bones. My teeth started shivering but I could not define whether it was by cold or fear. The dark moonless night sheltered shadows of bushes that surrounded the river and rose as wraiths and ghosts on the verge of jumping on us. Leonardo held my body, strongly, avoiding the waters from taking me. When we were in the middle of the river, we heard a flurry on the bridge, then soldiers running, then shooting. With my heart in my mouth, I thought: "we had gone so far to be discovered!" Then, Leonardo speeded up the step and dragged the dead weight of my body. The waters waved as if it they were a fabric. Leonardo managed to shorten the gap that separated us from the other side. For a few moments, exhausted, we took time to stop to recover our breath. Later, we ran to the small hill where it was assumed some guys would be expecting us to give us a vehicle. My heart was pumping in a hurry by adrenaline and threatened to go out my mouth. The magician seeing my unease whispered:
-Quiet! The shots were a little distraction to move the soldiers to the other side of the bridge so we could cross without problems.
- And you could not let me know earlier? -I said almost dying and regaining my composure.
The wizard looked at me and said in derision:
-But what a bad fugitive you are! And I thought that the brandy had improved your temperament!
I stared at him a while, speechless. Then a car came and parked a few blocks away from the hill where we were hiding. Seconds later a flashlight began to make us signs.
-Come on! -Said Leonardo- our transportation has arrived.
We got up quietly, I turned slightly my head toward the bridge, but the guards were no longer there. I ran to the car behind Leonardo and once inside, the car started.
The meeting with my sisters was plagued with hugs and sentimentality. Beatrice, with her perfume aura decorating the environment by distilling beauty and self-esteem, cuddled me with hugs and kisses. Mariana, with Bartolomeo in her arm and Nicanor in the other, proclaiming welcome witty phrases, and Salome, my adoptive sister, with a big smile cuddled with my lovely phrases of affection. To my surprise, Batam-Al-Bur also was there. He had brought my magic book and some other things that I didn't have the opportunity to take with me because of the urgency of my departure. I can't deny that it was a relief to go back to civilization and electricity.
I asked Leonardo to stay, at least for dinner before leaving, but he replied that the circumstances required his immediate presence in Eisenbaum. I asked him to send my regards to Americus and to tell him how sorry I was by what happened. The magician hugged me and said goodbye with a slight kiss before disappearing within the same vehicle that drove us home, but not before dodging the barrage of claims by Ño Josefina on the occasion of my escape.
It was very difficult for me to see him go; and to the joy of the reunion with my family also joined the nostalgia for a lost love. I felt a huge void in the heart; as if someone had taken something that already felt it was mine. Sad is the sadness of a lost love! It is sadness different from all the other sorrows of the world. It is a void that settles in the soul, huge and black, which daunted the spirit as the eternal wandering souls in purgatory; no rest or peace, prowling the corners in search of that so precious and lost. How sad is the sadness of love! Has no consolation, but in the presence of the loved one; orphan joy brimming with sobs and melancholies.
It took me little time to update my sisters in what had happened in Eisenbaum during my