Chapter Four: Do As Much As You Can To Improve
First, I looked at myself. I asked “If I were the type of woman that I would like to attract (I like super hot, very intelligent women), what would make me want to be with a man?”
So I started reading, listening to tapes, going to seminars… you name it. And I started to work on my ‘presentation’ of myself.
I now think that it’s important to get EVERY POSSIBLE thing going for you that you can.
Here's my take: If you have messed up teeth, that doesn’t prevent you from dressing well (for instance), so don’t let it.Get a cool hair style (It's OK to ask a stylist what's cool and get help on this one).Buy nice clothes (don’t tell me that you don’t have the $$$. Get on eBay, go to the Nordstrom Rack and look at the clearance items. I did it to begin with).
If you will do just a few key things, they won’t necessarily HELP you attract women, but they’ll get rid of things that are PREVENTING you from attracting women now that you DON'T EVEN REALIZE.
Make no mistake about, if you’re interested in ATTRACTIVE women, you’d better realize right now that these things make a difference.
You don’t have to work out ten times a week, but get your body in at least OK shape. You don’t have to have perfect teeth, but make sure that they’re clean and that your breath is great.
My personal view: If you're overweight, poorly groomed, etc. these are all things that are within your control. You should get them handled for YOURSELF. If you don't, then I'm going to assume that you don't have very much self respect, in which case almost NOTHING.
I tell you can help.
Women notice details that most men don't. They notice if your belt and shoes match.They notice what kinds of foods you like to eat. They notice all the details, then make assumptions about every other area of your life based on these details.
So learn what nice shoes are, and how to keep them nice. Figure out how colors and clothing go together and what is cool. It’s worth it.
I wasn’t ‘cool’ when I started, now I’ve learned how to be. Huge difference. (Am I saying that you can’t attract women if you wear Nike’s and have messed up hair? No. But remember the old saying: "A blind pig can find an occasional truffle…")
Of course, don't overdo it.
I've tried the whole dressing well bit in the past, to the point of looking like I'm trying too hard. Now I dress more 'casual nice.' I wear a lot of Calvin Klein T-Shirts with black jeans and nice black shoes, etc. This look, with a nice leather coat, works well in almost any situation. This is a look that you can put together for a couple or few hundred bucks (for several sets).
Here’s my mindset: Keep improving all the time, even if it’s the SMALLEST DETAIL.
I noticed recently that at least once every time I go out, a girl will ask me for a light. I always just said “I don’t smoke” or “No” and left it at that. Couple weeks ago I said “Ah-Ha” and I went to the lighter store SPECIFICALLY to find the coolest lighter that anyone has invented. I bought this torch lighter that make a huge flame. It looks like a welding flame. So what do you think happened the first time I went out with it? Right… got asked for a light… and got a 'wow' reaction from her, which started a conversation.
A list of random things to improve:
* Keep all nails on your body short, clean and neat.
*The only place hair is good is on your head. Keep all other hair trimmed, or have it removed. Nose and ear hairs are a no-no.
*Bushy eyebrows are a no-no. Bushy pubic hairs are a no-no.
*Keep the teeth clean. Get a tongue scraper and use it a lot.
*Floss. Use mouthwash. Fix any blatantly wrong teeth. Do it.
* Wash yourself three times when you shower. Dirt and body odors don't come off with just a rinse. Wash your body completely three times before you meet a woman.
*Use a good deodorant (I don't like anti-perspirants, as they block your lymph system).
*Keep feet, shoes, and socks ultra clean. No foot odor is permitted, period.
* Get a good cologne. Try Dolce and Gabanna, Cerruti Image, or Gaultier for men. And don't OVER-do it! No cologne is better than a lot of cologne. One or two squirts, applied an hour before you're going to be meeting women is best.
Remember, women notice the details and assume you handle everything else the same way.Self Image, Self Talk, And Other Self Stuff.The way I see it, underpinning all of these outer details and techniques is your self-image, confidence, personality, and all of that other intangible stuff that takes a bit to get under control. So let me address how I got my personal self-image stuff together before I talk about what I do specifically. (By the way, this is the most important part of this book. All of my success has flowed from my attitude and confidence - not the other way around. So if you read nothing else,read this.)