Chapter 3
Attitude:
Raw Material for Thought
Although we have reviewed thought and the mind and have understood that thoughts lead to feelings, actions, habits, character and our destiny, we are yet to understand how thoughts are produced in the mind.
Earlier we discussed that the mind is like a Thought Factory. This factory keeps producing thoughts but we have no direct control over it. However, the factory needs a raw material to produce its product – “Thoughts.”
In any production unit, the quality of the finished product depends on the quality of the raw material. Likewise, in the Thought Factory too, the quality of thought depends on the quality of ATTITUDE that we supply to our mind, as raw material. So, let us understand how attitude becomes the raw material for producing thoughts.
What is Attitude?
Attitude is the way in which we react, respond and behave. It is a physical and mental response. The response may be due to our thoughts, actions, feelings, emotions, others' actions or circumstances. Our attitude can be either Positive or Negative.
Every day and most of the time, we react and respond to things happening around us and within us. We react to our own thoughts as well as to others' actions; this is expressed in our behavior. We react to circumstances, and in fact, we are actually reacting to life. Therefore, we are constantly thinking, feeling, acting or responding with our attitude. While we cannot directly control our thought and the feelings and actions they produce, we have command over our attitude.
As we are responding and reacting every day, the conscious mind is either thinking and following the subsequent links – that is, feeling and acting in the Thought Chain or it is reacting and responding to somebody else’s thoughts or actions. Sometimes, the conscious mind is reacting to our own moods, beliefs or habits.
Our mood is our state of mind. The mind may be in a good mood or bad mood, happy mood or sad mood. We thus understand that the mood of the mind depends upon the kind of emotions that we have currently chosen to live with. If we choose positive emotions, the mind is in a positive mood, but when we live with negative emotions, our mood or state of mind becomes negative. Thus, you will notice that even though something negative happens, a person in a good mood reacts positively, while the opposite is also true. A person in a bad mood will react negatively even in the best of circumstances.
Our mind also reacts to our beliefs. What are beliefs? Over the years, we are exposed to certain patterns of living and we tend to believe in some of these. These beliefs become our philosophy, our way of life, our ethos and even our life's constitution. These beliefs are formed by repeated thoughts or observations, and they stand like iron pillars in the mind. Therefore, although a particular circumstance deserves a type of reaction, our mind reacts differently depending on the beliefs it is attached to. This may not be logical, but the mind still reacts that way because it believes in something and its response is based on this belief.
Every time we react, we are choosing a behavior that is depositing a raw material in the mind to produce a thought. Suppose, we see somebody doing something that is not as per our expectations, then it creates an intense disappointment or a feeling of hatred or dislike, which makes us react nastily and develop a negative attitude. This negative attitude acts as a raw material and directly influences the mind to produce a corresponding negative thought and thereafter a negative feeling and action. However, if we have the willpower to control our attitude and understand the other person's action, we will choose to react with patience and compassion. This positive attitude or reaction to the exact same situation deposits a positive raw material in the mind that leads to a corresponding positive feeling and action. Therefore, the type of attitude we choose, either positive or negative, becomes the raw material for the mind and produces the corresponding positive or negative thought, respectively.
Each time we react, respond and behave, our attitude supplies the raw material to the mind and is thus directly responsible for the quality of thoughts the mind produces. In fact, when we constantly repeat our attitude, the consistent reactions not only act as raw material to produce thought but also crystallizes in the mind as a habit.
What is Habit?
The dictionary defines a habit as a recurrent, often unconscious pattern of behavior that is acquired through frequent repetition. Habits are behaviors formed by an individual from repetitive actions, reactions, thoughts and feelings that have become the very essence of a person's life. As are one's habits, so are one's thoughts and actions. Hence the saying “Change your habits to change your life.” Once cultivated, habits are rock-like and difficult to break. Once we form a habit, the habit in turn forms our life.
How are habits formed?
We are not born with habits. Instead, we grow up forming habits depending on the environment and surroundings we live in. Our mind is empty at birth. Once the subconscious mind is formed, it triggers thoughts, which in turn, lead to feelings and actions. These actions when performed repetitively get established in the subconscious mind as a habit. The act of repetition influences the subconscious mind and leads to the creation of habits.
Habits are created not only by repetitive actions but also by repetitive reactions expressed in our attitude, behavior and responses as they crystallize in our mind bit by bit. Each time we react, not only does the mind get triggered to think a corresponding thought, but also the reaction deposits in the mind an emotion, finally creating a strong habit.
Habits, once formed, become the pillars of our life. They take charge of our mind and thoughts, our feelings and emotions, our attitude and reactions. In fact, habits are responsible for everything we do in life because our life gets programmed for living in a particular way depending on the habits we have cultivated. The foundation of our entire personality, sometimes understood as character, is based on the habits we form. We think, act and react with this personality or character until we decide to change.
As a person grows, the mind becomes stronger and stronger with stronger habits, thoughts, feelings and convictions. Parents, teachers and mentors influence a child's character as it grows from an infant to an adult.
Can habits be changed?
Habits take charge of our mind. They become the directors of the Thought Factory and make it produce their kind of thoughts. Positive habits, on the one hand, take charge of our mind to produce positive thoughts, which then lead to positive feelings and actions. On the other hand, negative habits will influence the thought factory to produce negative thoughts. These in turn lead to negative feelings and negative actions.
To view the process more practically, let us reflect upon our habits. Many of us may develop the habit of reacting with anger. The habit of anger will create angry thoughts and will lead us to feel angry and frustrated. The frustration then becomes a habit and constantly creates thoughts of anger and frustration. This negative circle will continue with each negative thought, feeling and action adding a layer to the habit, thus making it stronger.
Positive or negative habits and traits define one’s personality or character. However, it doesn't mean that if these habits happen to be negative ones, they cannot be changed.
We can compare a habit to a thick cable made up of several thin wires that are twisted together. Similarly, a strong habit can be perceived to result from the cumulative formation of several actions, reactions, thoughts and feelings that come together. Athick cable, which is hard to break, can be easily undone wire by wire; likewise, strong habits can also be broken by dissolving or changing, one by one, the actions, reactions, thoughts and feelings that comprise the habit.
Another way to view a habit is to visualize it as the long hair of a woman. Each action, reaction, thought or feeling is just like one strand of hair. By itself, it can just be plucked off effortlessly, and it will easily break away from the scalp. However, just try to hold the entire plait of hair and pull it from the scalp. It is impossible to break it free. Habits also behave in the same way.
The only way to change a habit is by dissolving it thought by thought, feeling by feeling and action by action. And since we cannot control our thoughts that lead to feelings and actions, we should control our attitude that leads to our responses and reactions and influences our thoughts. Is this a lengthy process? Not really. Changing all negative habits into positive ones may take some time, but the change starts the moment we make the decision or the choice to respond with a positive attitude. The moment we start responding positively, we start destroying the negative habits. Slowly, but surely we will change the negative elements in our life to more positive ones because attitude is a matter of choice.
While moods, beliefs and habits influence our attitude, what is it that actually controls our attitude?
Our WILLplays a vital role in our choosing our attitude – positive or negative. A waiter in a restaurant may accidently spill water on us. However, our willpower actually decides whether to react with anger or forgive him. Therefore, the mind also develops a power, called willpower, which is responsible for the choice of attitude and thereafter thought.
At this point, we have discovered several things. So let's sum it up. We have discovered that thoughts lead us to our destiny through feelings, actions, habit and character. We have understood the mind and how it produces thought. We have realized that attitude is the raw material that produces thought. In addition, habits also crystallize in the mind to produce thoughts. The will helps the mind to choose an attitude that triggers thought and thus influences our feelings, actions and finally destiny. Moods and beliefs also influence our attitude, but finally, while all of these influence our attitude, it is attitude that is the raw material that produces thought.
While we have discovered the above, we are yet to find out what creates our attitude, and thus our thoughts, feelings, actions, habits and destiny.
The magical ingredient that creates Attitude is our Emotion. Our emotions can be positive or negative, and I call them PEP(Positive Energy Power) and NEP (Negative Energy Poison), respectively. This PEPand NEPcreate our Attitude, which in turn, influences our thought that creates feelings, action, habits, character and destiny.
